This Isn't What They Wanted

{This is an indie, semi-selective rp blog for Joshua Washington from Until Dawn. I am canon-divergent and AU and OC friendly.}

[youmeangymclass-blog]

Why not? || closed

A chuckle formed on lopsided lips as Josh shook his head. The florescent lights of the diner buzzed gently overhead.  He’d spent more time with Caroline than he’d intended, but he wasn’t complaining.  She’d made what was meant to obviously have been a joke, but it stirred something within him.  “All I know,” he smirked, “Is the last time I danced with Death, I stepped on his fuckin’ toes.”

@inviciousx 

[inviciousx]

“Oof.” she snorted, taking a second to belt out a laugh. “You don’t wanna do that. The man has a temper.”

[youmeangymclass-blog]

“Yeah, tell me about it,” he muttered, taking a sip of the warm tea he ordered. It was almost one in the morning and the place was quiet save for the shuffling of the waiter as he absently cleaned the grill and the sound of the cold wind outside.  “He’s proven it more than enough to me. Consider me stepping on his toes as my act of defiance. He tried to get me too... “

[youmeangymclass-blog]

Why not? || closed

A chuckle formed on lopsided lips as Josh shook his head. The florescent lights of the diner buzzed gently overhead.  He’d spent more time with Caroline than he’d intended, but he wasn’t complaining.  She’d made what was meant to obviously have been a joke, but it stirred something within him.  “All I know,” he smirked, “Is the last time I danced with Death, I stepped on his fuckin’ toes.”

@inviciousx 

[youmeangymclass-blog]

[youmeangymclass-blog]

{Not my video. This though.... This is perfect.}

[youmeangymclass-blog]

[youmeangymclass-blog]

[youmeangymclass-blog]

[youmeangymclass-blog]

[distantsongsofjoy]

“You look pale… sit down.” {youmeangymclass}

Panic Attack Starters:

August chewed silently at the tip of his tongue behind his lips, dull fingernails clawing into the skin of his arms until he moved to chew at them. He was already a generally pale person, so the statement that he looked pale was a little surprising… Or, it would be, if he was paying Josh any attention. Actually, he was sort of just staring blankly, his heart pounding rapidly in his chest. His breath was coming quickly, shakily, but he seemed to be trying to keep himself mostly under control. However, every time he closed his eyes he could see it. He didn’t feel well, his stomach churning with the cold feeling of wet hands on the back of his neck, though that action was non-existent. His whole body felt frigid and empty, like something had torn into him and ripped out a piece of his consciousness and left him with a gaping hole.

He swallowed hard, his legs feeling like jello. Luckily, he saw Josh’s lips move when he said to sit down. Slowly he lowered himself onto the couch, still tearing into his nails with his teeth. His other arm squeezed his middle tightly, gaze empty and unblinking, completely glazed over. Whatever had happened clearly he was shaken, caught up in some kind of dizzied panic. Eventually, though, he blinked hard and buried his face in his hands, squeezing his eyes shut as he just tried to breathe. His shoulders were tense, his whole body sort of curling in on itself on the couch. He seemed like he just wanted to shrink away into nothingness and that was true. He couldn’t seem to escape the sound of rushing water, the visual of the sink, the pain of a memory that he had hoped wouldn’t resurface today, but apparently this was a moment it would.

He remained silent and still, his face buried in his hands to hide his pale expression, to hide the fact that the rapid pounding of his heart was starting to force tears to well in his eyes deep blueish green eyes.

[youmeangymclass-blog]

At first Josh was unsure how to approach the situation, hazel eyes appraising the room for something, anything he might have missed. His first reaction to seeing August like this was to think he missed something dangerous. It was part of his hyper-vigilance. He was always on edge in some way or another. Once he was sure there was no threat, he made himself steady his own breathing.  “August…” He breathed, kneeling in front of him, his voice soft, though hopefully loud enough that he would notice. He was covering his face, and he didn’t want to make things worse by touching him. 

“August, it’s okay man,” he assured.  “Breathe with me,” he stated, signing as he spoke. He knew at the moment he was too wrapped up in what he was feeling to pay attention, but when he did look up, he didn’t want him to be completely lost. His ASL still wasn’t perfect, but he’d gotten a lot better over the past few months. August always made sure he was okay… he wanted to be able to do the same. 

“Just breathe,” he repeated, trying not to get to close.  “You’re not there anymore man. You’re not there. You’re here with me. If you want I can help you ground yourself, but I need you to focus, okay?” He offered, licking his lips nervously. 

@dysfunctionaljoy

[youmeangymclass-blog]

[rp-meme-blog]

Send “💒” for our muses to wake up married after a long night of partying.

[distantsongsofjoy]

youmeangymclass‌:

Just thinking about it made Josh feel sick. The whole scenario was like something out of a bad, campy, eighties horror movie.  He wished that was all it had been.  “Okay….” He signed, taking a deep breath. He saw that both signing and speaking seemed easier for August, so he would continue to do so. It also gave him something else to focus on so even though the words were forming, he was only half concentrated. He could still focus on making his hands do as he wanted them to. Maybe it would help him remember he was here in the present and those were just memories. He still felt a little shaky, but he tried not to let his hands betray him. 

“Every year, my friends and I would go up to an old ski lodge my parents owned,” He explained.  “It was our annual winter getaway. We were celebrating closing in on my senior year. Well, mine and some of my friends. Some were a few years younger. Including my sisters.” Some of his signing was a little slow, just due to his lack of experience, but he was trying. 

“We had all been drinking, but me and my buddy Chris, we passed out. I was supposed to have been looking out for them….” 

He stopped himself, making sure he kept himself in the present.  He couldn’t change it now. He couldn’t go back… he’d made his choices. 

“My other friends knew that Hannah, one of my sisters, had a crush on our other friend Mike. They played a prank on her, making her think he wanted to meet up and make out or something. Embarrassed her in front of everyone and got it on camera. She was upset and without thinking about the consequences, she ran out into the snow.” 

His voice was cracking now, and he had to swallow down the emotion that was rising.  “Beth, her twin, went running out after her, and that was the last time anyone saw either of them. Their case stayed open for over a year, but honestly, after three months they got presumed dead. The case went cold… wasn’t until a year later that we learned the truth, and I lost everyone else….”

@dysfunctionaljoy

As Josh explained his past, August looked at him through wide, intent eyes, read to listen, ready to learn and understand to the best of his ability. His gaze shifted back and forth between his slightly sloppy gestures and his slow moving lips. Josh’s lips were always a little harder to read than most because of his overbite, so the fact that he was learning sign language was a huge help.

The more he started to deteriorate with emotion, the more August felt his expression turning to one of concern, brows furrowed and head tilted to one side slightly. His gaze shifted to watch him when he paused, noting the way he faltered despite being unable to hear the crack in his voice. He could tell it was making him feel emotional and he sort of felt bad that he felt the need to tell him. He wanted to tell him it was OK, that he didn’t need to go on if he didn’t want to, but before he could say anything he was going on.

He pressed his lips into a thin line, a hard frown on his face once he finished the story. The truth? Everyone else? What exactly was the truth? He couldn’t help but want to ask, but at the same time… He knew it wasn’t his place to. Josh was kind enough to share just that tidbit of his story, of his past with him and he wasn’t about to push him any further. Besides, after the panic he had been going through not long ago, he didn’t want to accidentally cause more of it.

“ I… “ He bit his lip, still frowning sympathetically at Josh… He couldn’t imagine what that would be like. To lose a sister. To lose… Rhys… God, if he lost Rhys…

“ I’m so sorry, Josh… “ He had almost lost Rhys before… Multiple times, though there was one time in particular that stuck out in his mind. What would he have done if he had lost him? Gone insane, maybe? He wasn’t sure if he could live…

“ I… I- I don’t know… what- what to say. That’s… “ He let his gaze lift to meet the other’s, readily ignoring the bruise under his eye that was now flushed a nice solid purple. Perhaps they should ice that… “ I can’t imagine… I… “ He swallowed hard. “ Look, like I said, if you need a place to stay, my door is always open. I– My brother might… be… a little uncomfortable at first, but it isn’t you… He’s just… he’s a little different and he has a lot of anxieties… “ He bit his lip. He would definitely have to tell Rhys if Josh was going to stay with them for a little while. He knew his brother wouldn’t like it, would probably lock himself up in his room for a few days, but… He could manage. He would manage. Would have to. Clearly Josh needed someone right now, someone to look after him… Sort of like how Rhys needed him…

“ I want you to… to feel like you can stay as long as you need. We– I… You- you really scared me… Josh. And… I… I’m more scared for you, than I am of you, OK? “

[youmeangymclass-blog]

August’s sympathy didn’t fall short of his acknowledgement. He was thankful for the empathy he extended to him, but it was his last statement that really caught his attention. To say he was more worried for him than of him was one thing, but in saying it, it was also an admittance that August was afraid of him in some way, even if it was minor. That cut him deep, though he covered that pain with a grateful, lopsided smile.  He deserved that. He deserved for the rest of the people in his life to hold him at arm’s length. He’d come to terms with that years ago, even if Dr. Hill told him he was wrong. That was the price he had to pay for deciding to go through with his game up there on the mountain. No matter how many times he reminded himself it was meant to be a prank, he couldn’t help but remember that his actions had consequences, just like the actions his friends took that led to Hannah and Beth dying. 

“Thank you,” he breathed, pushing he dark thoughts out of his mind that kept trying to creep into his consciousness.  “Losing them led to a hell of a lot of problems.” 

By this time he’d started signing again. He wasn’t sure why he was continuing. In a way it was freeing though. He’d never told anyone about that night save for Dr. Hill. He wanted to tell August though. He wanted to get it off his chest. He didn’t always want to hide it. 

“For months after they went missing, we looked for them. The worst thought then was that we wouldn’t find them until the snow thawed in the spring. When that didn’t happen either, we assumed a wolf or a bear had gotten to them. We had a service for them. My friends sent cards and flowers. They said they were sorry. They wished they could change it... they were there for me.... but where had they been for Hannah and Beth?” 

His eye hurt and it was swelling. It made him think about how Chris had knocked him out with a loose board when they tied him up in the barn before.....

He pushed the thought away quickly. 

“The next year, I invited everyone back. I wanted to get revenge. I wanted to scare them and make them see how my sister felt. I never meant for anyone to get hurt...”

@dysfunctionaljoy

[distantsongsofjoy]

youmeangymclass‌:

Hazel hues danced over August from Josh’s place on the floor. He didn’t feel like he had the energy to get back to his feet. His legs felt like jello.  A nod at the sincerely asked question made him swallow thickly in admitting that he didn’t want to be alone. He hated this. He hated that his mind dared to betray him in this way. Normally he was good at grounding himself and getting back on track, but this??? This was like it had been back in the mines. 

He had to push that thought, that memory, away before he let himself spiral back down.  “Do you mind if I stay with you? I’ll try my best. They’re just supposed to call tomorrow,” he assured, slowing his breathing as he tried to keep himself steady. He couldn’t let his mind work too hard. He was already on double the dose that was normally prescribed. What else could they do? 

Forcing himself into what he had been learning, he sat a bit straighter, working through his mind fog to sign. He hated feeling like he was leaving August in the dark.  “It’ll take some time to explain, but I trust you….” he breathed, his words trailing off after he’d both spoken and signed them.  “I owe you this much. Sit with me… “

In all truth, he’d had problems for years before the incident happened. He had started a long string of both psychiatrists and antidepressants as far back as 2006, and even then when the meds didn’t work, he tried self medicating. It obviously didn’t work then either. It was quite the opposite actually. His delusions got worse after, and he was admitted into a psychiatric facility for over a month because of the nature of his attempt at suicide to get the voices… the visions… to stop. 

Those things didn’t matter now though.  

Well…. they did, but they were nothing in comparison to the things he went through after them.  Still being careful to sign, though he was sure he was stumbling over some words, he asked him, “Have I ever told you about how my sisters died?”

@dysfunctionaljoy

August shrugged a little at Josh’s question. “ I wouldn’t offer if I minded, “ he assured him, fingertips slowly starting to claw into the flesh on his arm. It wasn’t that Josh was making him nervous, but… He still felt off-kilter. Still felt a soft buzz in the back of his mind that put him on-edge, that left him hanging in fight or flight.

He swallowed hard, the signing helping him understand Josh’s words even if it was a little stuttered and sometimes hard to read. Being able to read his hands and his lips was a helpful combination. Quietly, he started to sink down to the ground in front of him. He didn’t move beside him, though, still wary and just not wanting closeness right now. He was still shaky from the previous events and didn’t want him to accidentally touch him and strike a nerve. Josh didn’t need to have another black eye…

Hugging his legs to his chest gently, he rest his chin against his knees and stared at Josh silently, waiting until he spoke again. His gaze flickered from his rough signs to his lips.

“ I… I don’t think so, no… “

[youmeangymclass-blog]

Just thinking about it made Josh feel sick. The whole scenario was like something out of a bad, campy, eighties horror movie.  He wished that was all it had been.  “Okay....” He signed, taking a deep breath. He saw that both signing and speaking seemed easier for August, so he would continue to do so. It also gave him something else to focus on so even though the words were forming, he was only half concentrated. He could still focus on making his hands do as he wanted them to. Maybe it would help him remember he was here in the present and those were just memories. He still felt a little shaky, but he tried not to let his hands betray him. 

“Every year, my friends and I would go up to an old ski lodge my parents owned,” He explained.  “It was our annual winter getaway. We were celebrating closing in on my senior year. Well, mine and some of my friends. Some were a few years younger. Including my sisters.” Some of his signing was a little slow, just due to his lack of experience, but he was trying. 

“We had all been drinking, but me and my buddy Chris, we passed out. I was supposed to have been looking out for them....” 

He stopped himself, making sure he kept himself in the present.  He couldn’t change it now. He couldn’t go back... he’d made his choices. 

“My other friends knew that Hannah, one of my sisters, had a crush on our other friend Mike. They played a prank on her, making her think he wanted to meet up and make out or something. Embarrassed her in front of everyone and got it on camera. She was upset and without thinking about the consequences, she ran out into the snow.” 

His voice was cracking now, and he had to swallow down the emotion that was rising.  “Beth, her twin, went running out after her, and that was the last time anyone saw either of them. Their case stayed open for over a year, but honestly, after three months they got presumed dead. The case went cold... wasn’t until a year later that we learned the truth, and I lost everyone else....”

@dysfunctionaljoy

[inksplit]

[distantsongsofjoy]

Continued with @youmeangymclass from (x)

Communication was difficult between them at the current moment. Josh couldn’t think to sign and August couldn’t think to read his lips, could hardly keep his gaze focused on him long enough to do so. Still, he did his best, quickly looking up whenever he heard the hum of his breathing shift to a distinct hum of talking, though he couldn’t hear the words being said to him. He felt his stomach twist as his gaze fell on his lips again, catching sight of the quickly swelling spot on his face where he had hit him, the redness in his cheek where he had slapped him… His fingertips poked at his own bruising, wincing at the pain there.

He wasn’t sure he understood much of what Josh was saying, but he just watched and pretended like he was keeping up. His heavy breathing, the nervousness of his tone made it harder to keep track of his words. At the very least, he understood that he was on meds, but that they weren’t working right. Perhaps his body had built up a tolerance to them… Whatever the case, it needed to be fixed, clearly. For his own sake. Doctors were so stupid sometimes…

There was one word in particular he was almost certain he hadn’t read right and that was “wendigo.” What did that even mean? Surely it was just a gibberish mistake of sloppy lip reading, exhaustion, and the anxious continuous pounding of his heart.

When he saw him look down at the spot he was rubbing on his arm, he quickly looked down again, vibrant, fuzzy curls falling over his forehead. “ Uh, no, no it’s– I’m OK… “ he murmured, biting his lip as he wrung his fingers around his wrist nervously. He grew quiet then, not catching the last words that Josh said, but glancing up a bit jumpily when he slid to the ground.

“ So… “ He swallowed hard. “ Are- are- are we…. are we gonna talk about… about it? I mean, Josh, I- I- I’ve seen you, um, I’ve dealt with you panicking before, but… but, um… not- not like that, are you gonna be OK? “ Frowning, he let his gaze lift a little. His heart was still beating out of his chest, his brain working a hundred miles an hour to try and clear the flashbacks, the breathless tendency to return to those positions in his childhood when he felt this afraid, this defensive…

“ I mean, d- do you… do you, um… need somebody… I dunno, maybe… to stay with… until your meds get fixed? “ He wasn’t about to judge the guy for whatever was wrong with his head, whatever caused him to freak out like that. Hell, he dealt with plenty of crazy compulsions himself that were so much worse in his youth. His brother was equally as crazy sometimes. He knew how to handle these sorts of things and he never judged, never pushed away, always drew closer. It was ingrained in him to offer help in those kind of situations. Maybe he should’ve been a psychiatrist…

[youmeangymclass-blog]

Hazel hues danced over August from Josh’s place on the floor. He didn’t feel like he had the energy to get back to his feet. His legs felt like jello.  A nod at the sincerely asked question made him swallow thickly in admitting that he didn’t want to be alone. He hated this. He hated that his mind dared to betray him in this way. Normally he was good at grounding himself and getting back on track, but this??? This was like it had been back in the mines. 

He had to push that thought, that memory, away before he let himself spiral back down.  “Do you mind if I stay with you? I’ll try my best. They’re just supposed to call tomorrow,” he assured, slowing his breathing as he tried to keep himself steady. He couldn’t let his mind work too hard. He was already on double the dose that was normally prescribed. What else could they do? 

Forcing himself into what he had been learning, he sat a bit straighter, working through his mind fog to sign. He hated feeling like he was leaving August in the dark.  “It’ll take some time to explain, but I trust you....” he breathed, his words trailing off after he’d both spoken and signed them.  “I owe you this much. Sit with me... “

In all truth, he’d had problems for years before the incident happened. He had started a long string of both psychiatrists and antidepressants as far back as 2006, and even then when the meds didn’t work, he tried self medicating. It obviously didn’t work then either. It was quite the opposite actually. His delusions got worse after, and he was admitted into a psychiatric facility for over a month because of the nature of his attempt at suicide to get the voices... the visions... to stop. 

Those things didn’t matter now though.  

Well.... they did, but they were nothing in comparison to the things he went through after them.  Still being careful to sign, though he was sure he was stumbling over some words, he asked him, “Have I ever told you about how my sisters died?”

@dysfunctionaljoy

[youmeangymclass-blog]

The Weather Today || closed

[youmeangymclass-blog]

She retook her seat, smiling noncommittally at the man as he sat. Expecting the cafe to lapse into the overdetermined silence that a place like this normally assumed, she was surprised and had to look up again from her screen again when he took the baton of conversation and proceeded to run laps around the track which she had not been prepared for.  

Caroline nodded and hummed to extend some measure of civility into his efforts, and, after a few seconds, forced herself to lower her laptop screen until it looked like a Pac-man mouth, realizing that she was finding her frustratingly empty inbox more magnetizing than his conversation at first.

Her expression did perk up as he mentioned the benefits of working at what sounded like an amusement park. She envisioned brightly painted rides of questionable integrity and children selling their soul in front of crane machines to win a stuffed animal. She smiled slightly, genuinely, leaning forward on her table. She wondered briefly what kind of first job she might have had if that had not been predetermined for her. They always seemed like a rite of passage; especially having never experienced it herself. There was a restaurant in town where the waiters always seemed to get along and the Rueben’s were always served on toasted rye. Maybe she could have worked there.

Her fantasy was interrupted when she vaguely noticed the man excusing himself in a fashion that was equal parts self-aware and awkward. “Take it easy.” she instructed him casually as he was retreating toward the door.

She passed a few minutes idly flipping through unimportant panes. The young barista behind the counter had returned to schmoozing her new boss, acting out her accident. The older woman seemed to react well to the self-deprecating humor. Caroline still didn’t like her.

Huffing, her concentration broken, and an auburn sky rising over the desert town, Caroline shut her computer and stretched momentarily before packing, rising, and heading toward the door. She inhaled deeply as she walked out. The air was bone dry but rich with nutrients from the surrounding lands, like they were all walking in invisible, sunny wine. It carried with it to, a hint of smoke. Caroline crossed the road to the parking lot, fishing in her bag for the single key she foolishly, reliably forgot to buy a keychain for when she spotted the source of the one foul smell in the area: her new friend.

Her mouth twisted uncomfortably. He was close enough to be in range of spotting her easily when the headlights of her car flipped on. Though they owed each other nothing in reality, it felt cheap to impart a sorry-that-sucks smile and drive off into the sunset. People who helped deserved to be helped. Right?

At least, that’s what she told herself as she locked her computer into her car.

“What’d you do?” she called in dry playfulness, stuffing her hands into her jacket as she neared the hybrid vehicle-dragon and its distressed owner.

His door was open to let the warm, evening air circulate a bit rather than being stagnant and sticky.  “I wish I knew,” he sighed, a half chuckle leaving lopsided lips.  “It’s this little metal piece here that causes the spark between the starter and the battery. I don’t even know what to call it,” he muttered, getting out and lifting the hood to show her.  “I can put my pocket knife here and make it connect. When I do that it’ll start, but it doesn’t stay running. The moment I move it, it dies again. I tried calling a tow truck, but they have a three hour wait. I can....” he started before he had to swallow thickly.  He felt himself getting a bit light headed and his mind trying to race. He didn’t have his meds with him. They were at the motel. He was fine though right.... nothing was wrong. He could fix this. There was nothing going so bad he couldn’t fix it. 

“I can find the closest auto parts store and start walking,” he continued after a moment. It couldn’t be more than a few miles. By the time he got back though it could be dark which would make it damn hard to change the part out. 

“If you’re from around here, would you mind telling me where the closest one is? I’ve only been in town a few days. Just kind of passing through, you know?” He stated, an almost nervous smile curling his lips as he chuckled gently again. Something he did out of nervous habit. 

[distantsongsofjoy]

Worry twisted in his gut as Josh's hazel eyes met his friend's. He thought he'd been doing better. The meds had been working, but for days now he'd been hearing and seeing things that simply weren't there. His hesrt was still racing the delusion they'd freed him of only moments ago with a stark slap to the face. "What? What did I do?" He asked, his voice low. Thinking about it, it struck him and he signed it instead, or at least he tried to. He was still learning, but he was learning for them.

@youmeangymclass

August’s breath came in slow heaves as he stared at the other, one hand outstretched as he stared at him wide-eyed, nervous, his fingers shaking. He remained at a distance, his arm extended to warn the other not to approach. He knew he had… issues. He had experienced them in a variety of circumstances over their time as friends, but… but he had no idea it was anything like this. He was on meds, right? This seemed like the kind of thing you needed to always be on meds, constantly and purposefully… No skipping. His brother was the same way, of course, but for entirely different reasons. He never acted quite like this… However, it was a good thing August was there because he had some general ideas of how to handle these types of situations.

As soon as the other started to talk to himself, started to verbalize his delusions, the hallucinations he was having, August had started to try and talk him down. When that didn’t work, though, he had ended up having to sort of physically tear him from his delusion to keep him from hurting him or hurting himself, the latter being the worse of the two. It reminded him of dark nights with his friends in high school… Bad trips, avoiding the hospital, demands not to call the cops… Crazy hallucinations, delusions, fears, schizophrenic nightmares… He could tell the other was seeing some crazy stuff.

He pulled his lip between his teeth, trying to get his pants to slow as he breathed deeply, worried eyes searching the other mutely until he saw his hands raise to sign for him. He swallowed hard, starting to slowly relax, but he wouldn’t let his guard down. Not yet.

“ You were freaking out, “ he hummed lowly. “ I don’t know, something about somebody watching us, about… “ He shook his head slowly, swallowing hard. A breath. His hand slowly lowered. “ It’s fine. Are you good now? Do you need medication? I– “ He pressed his lips into a thin line, fingertips gently reaching up to stroke his arm, where the other had grabbed him. He was steadfastly trying to ignore the bruise slowly forming under Josh’s eye, but he could see it… Frowning, he looked down at the ground to avoid staring at it, to avoid thinking about the previous minutes that had thrown him into such a defensive panic. 

“ Sorry. I- I- I- I didn’t know… what- what else to do… “ He had slapped him out of it, but the punch had been entirely unintentional. It was an automated response. A response to the sudden danger he found himself in when the other had grabbed him a bit violently.

[youmeangymclass-blog]

Josh’s mouth was dry and his jaw was tense. He didn’t blame August for hitting him. He didn’t blame him for being scared. Hell…. he was scared himself. He’d tried and failed in his signing. This time he didn’t even try. He did make sure he tried to speak clearly enough though. His hands were still shaking too badly, and at the moment he couldn’t remember much of what he’d learned.  “I…. I keep taking my meds,” he breathed, his heart beating so hard it was hurting his chest.  “They aren’t working right. I called my doctor, but I’m waiting for him to call me to make an appointment. I keep… I keep seeing them. My sisters, the windigos…. my friends.”

He hadn’t told August everything. He was terrified of being honest with him. His parents had disowned him and the only friend that still spoke to him from the past was Chris, and even then it took him forever to reach out to him. Things would never be the same and he knew it. 

“Are you okay?” He questioned, his gaze falling to his friend’s wrist.  “I didn’t mean to…” 

He bit his lip, leaning against the wall before he slid down to the floor.  “I…. I know I should just go home…” In truth though, he didn’t want to be alone.

@dysfunctionaljoy