Groovy.

A text-based ask blog for Army of Darkness Ashley J. Williams that has been taken by the entity. Real smooth.

[youngash]

Your Chosen One Has Fallen From The Sky!

The Entity’s realm howled with a gust of wind so strong that even the trees danced within its glory. The whole sight was chaotic, a portal opening from the sky with a black and orange hue. It felt inexplicably deep, similar to the ocean. Even a scream could be heard from it, though not one of pain or fear but more like shock? It was not a random woman's voice, as it sounded more like a man’s voice.

In a sudden surge of light, Ashley J. Williams himself had fallen from the sky, yelling at the top of his lungs before taking a great fall, slamming right into the floor with a thud and a bounce that soon accompanied it. He checked his body and right hand frantically, a frustrated expression plastered onto his bloody face. His Boomstick? Gone. Chainsaw hand? Gone; now replaced with his old metal hand that was fashioned from medieval armor. 

“Geez, a man can’t recite a little wordplay from this bad boy?” His voice broke the monotone noises of the forest, his metal hand slapping against the Necronomicon Ex-Mortis strapped to his waist. Speaking of, what the hell was this place. He looked down only to see letters with splattered blood and chainsaw stamps on them. “Great, a fan signing. What is this, an ask me page on a bulletin board from school or something?” Ash joked, only to come up with the greatest idea possible. Maybe these would help him find his way out of whatever the hell this place was. “Booyah, baby! Now, this is where the money is!” Sure, he wouldn’t be able to find his way out of here, but maybe he would get the answers soon.

Groovy.

(Welcome to the Ash Williams ask blog/rp blog! Feel free to catch some info from here and maybe it’ll help you out a little! Let’s have a fun one.)

[youngash]

Met any other survivors yet?

“Well, met a bunch of them. A lotta those murderous creature people too.” Ash said, nodding as he put his hands onto his hips. “As much as this place stinks, people gotta stop taking it so seriously. Look, I’d be able to handle a bunch of these people with my Boomstick and chainsaw hand but lookie, I don’t got that.” Ash sighed in frustration, throwing his hands up into the air. It really pissed him off having to run away from murderous killers wielding an assortment of weapons. “My favorite out of this bunch has gotta be the blondie Cheryl… maybe that one girl always wearing blue. Uh, Feng Min or something like that. Hell if I know. They’re always some mischievous bastards. Gotta say, I’m one too.”

[youngash]

How can I get more confident in myself

“Ya gotta look at everyone around you and realize they aren’t much better than you. Of course, nobody is better than me, but if you really think about it, not everyone else is doing much better. Sure, people aren’t dealing with an Evil that could destroy the world as we know it but they’re going through problems just like you.” Ash tried to give the best advice he could. Still, he wasn’t a man that would include himself in the rules. He was a rule breaker, the opposite of rules.

[youngash]

...... you single.......😶😶

“The King is always single no matter the time, baby.” Ash ran a hand through his hair charismatically, letting a sly and mischievous smile creep up onto his face. This man was truly groovy.

[youngash]

Best way to deal with anxiety

“Real hard one.” Ash admitted. Even if he didn’t want to come to terms with it, he had times where anxiety had gotten the best of him in tons of ways. Still, he always managed to come out on top. “It’s not something you can shoot and it isn’t something you can punch, but go back and think about the great things you’ve done. It’ll help, not that I know from experience, obviously.”

[youngash]

Date night ideas?

“Date night, huh?” He sat down and shrugged his shoulders, not knowing the answer. “Well, dates aren’t my thing. You ask me, a night out in the woods got ruined by Evil showing up and kissing my girl with Deadite disease that I took care of with a special cure.” Ash joked about the sad situation before continuing. “Take them out to the movies or something. In my experience, chicks love movies. Maybe I’ll come back to my regular time and become an actor so they’ll love it when I’m on the screen too.”

[youngash]

Favorite part about the middle ages.

“Hmm, being treated like I’m on top of the world. Obviously, I am. It’s a lot better than working at S-MART. They can’t appreciate Dr. Groovy like the primitives do. Just wish there was a princess around…” Ash started laughing confidently, nodding his head while gripping onto his metal hand. As much as it disappointed him, at least it wasn’t just his nub.

[youngash]

What should I do if someone accidentally starts the apocalypse (totally not me) from reading the necronomicon?

“Look here, pal. Start reading from the Necronomicon and I might have to kick you in a ditch.” He threatened, raising an eyebrow with a cautious look before waving his hands side to side within the air, almost as if he was dismissing the idea of something like that ever happening. “Now, let’s say someone with half a brain that, obviously can’t be me, reads the book. Call on the king himself. I’ll handle Evil with a grip that makes the Devil cry.”

[youngash]

Ok so an ex boyfriend of mine is going to a party that I was invited to, what should I do?

“Ex-boyfriend, huh? I’ve dealt with a lot of estranged women in my time, ones I’ve left behind in a not too happy state, that’s for sure.” Ash laughed before nodding, now ready to give some advice after thinking it over. “Go anyway. Don’t let a dumbass ruin a night full of partying. He talks to you? Tear him a new one.” Ash shrugged his shoulders after giving his advice, seeing that it was pretty solid. “I’ve fought Evil too many times to count, I see my ex’s as some evil too. That’s why you kick it in the nards.”

[youngash]

Favorite way to kill a deadite

“I’ve killed a lot of Deadites, I’ll say that much. Especially when I was in the knighthood age with peasants roaming the streets praising this big Boomstick of mine.” He put a hand onto his chin, his index finger tapping it gently as he looked up to the sky, thinking very meticulously which was something he didn’t do very often. “When I shoved my chainsaw into a Deadite’s stomach and watched all its guts spill out! Ohoho, that was real smooth. Well, the thing didn’t die right away. Had to make shit-lips over there take a shot from my Boomstick. Then that thing was really out for the count.”

[youngash]

Favorite pickup line?

“Gotta say, that’s a real hard one you’ve hit me with.” Ash scratches his head before shooting with his little finger guns, now laughing as he puts his hands onto his hips. “Whaddya say we get out of this place so Dr. Groovy here can give you a little injection? It’s a classic. Works all the time, one-hundred percent.” Ash nodded, crossing his arms proudly. “I recommend you use it yourself.”