paper cut survivors unite!

[younggluestick]

Another day, another lone pudding in the fridge. God continues to hunt me for sport.

Updates to follow.

[younggluestick]

I just re-watched Madagscar (2005). There’s no way that Mort is 50+

This isn’t California, nobody on Madagascar is getting lemur Botox.

There is no way they have a thriving plastic surgery industry and access to a 12-step skin care routine in the jungle.

[younggluestick]

I hate people who are haters. Being a hater is embarrassing. Excpet when I’m doing it, because I’m not a hater, I’m a critic, an intellectual, a great philosopher analyzing culture.

[younggluestick]

I hate how I let a little giggle slip out while I’m daydreaming and everyone around me thinks I’m schizophrenic

[younggluestick]

I am going to hang a picture of Zohran in my house like Irish Catholics did with JFK, or the Pope.

[younggluestick]

Dearest friends, I have endured yet another week in this capitalist wasteland. Morale is low. Soup supplies are critical.

[younggluestick]

Last night I feel like the nation took a collective Lexapro. Zohran Mamdani, my country, Northern Virginia, yearns for freedom.

Follow up: I’m actually so bummed I didn’t get to vote for Mamdani. I have Mamdani FOMO.

[younggluestick]

This is all getting too difficult to romanticise. This wouldn’t be happening to me if I were a huge dragon.

[younggluestick]

This is TOO MUCH, my friends will not respond to me I need to put this out into the world even though no one here will respond either.

[younggluestick]

I wonder sometimes, if i just put my dog in a tiny suit and fed it coffee, would it run a successful startup?

[younggluestick]

I think I have the immune system of a medieval peasant

[younggluestick]

i think i could have easily won an oscar, i just have other things going on right now

[younggluestick]

at the rate i respond to texts, i think people should just start sending me carrier pidgeons. I need the company anyway.

🐦🪶

carrier pigeon purchase ?

yes

no

Voting ended onFeb 6, 2025

[younggluestick]

accidentaly fed that dawg in me some chocolate. skkrt.

[younggluestick]

my thoughts on seeing donald jr. after the womens rally on saturday at the Waldorf:

I hate the way you talk to me

And the way you cut your hair

I hate the way you drive my car

I hate it when you stare

I hate your big dumb italian leather shoes

And the way you read my mind

I hate you so much that it makes me sick

And even makes me rhyme

I hate the way you're always wrong

I hate it when you lie

I hate it when you don’t make me laugh

Even worse when you make me cry

I hate it when you're around

And the fact that you did call

But mostly I hate the way you scare me

A little.

A lot.

Thank you all.

[younggluestick]

sometimes i think i werewolf. no magic powers, no immortality, just a hairy beast that breaths. just awful.

[younggluestick]

there’s this thing called psychosis, which i seem to be showing signs of. However my room is really pretty and my cardigan really suits me so maybe i do know whats best.