Your Bigender Big Brother @your-bigender-big-brother - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
Your Bigender Big Brother
@your-bigender-big-brother
This blog is my love letter to the multigender community and the many intricacies that come with being multigender. Check my pinned for more info about me and my work!
♡ Hello! I’m your bigender big brother, and this is an inclusive space for to talk about being bigender (and more!) I’m hoping to connect with you by sharing common experiences and hearing your unique stories. Please use he/him or ey/em/eirs for me!
All of my coined terms are on the YB3 Wiki if you want to check that out, and my Carrd has links to my other work!
♡ Other important links:
YB3 zine on Instagram (or go to @yb3zine.)
Ko-Fi (It has a shop page!)
Inner Space Discord server
Bigender resources on Fandom
Queer-focused essays
Stormy Talks YouTube channel
Similar blogs to follow (and more here)
Database of Maverinities blog
Personal archival blog
♡ No matter what your gender experience is, you're very much welcome here!
- Your Bigender Big Brother 💙💚
(Tags, BYF, and further info under the cut. It’s a bit wordy!)
♡ My tagging system:
bbb.txt - regular positivity text posts and some discussions
bbb.ask - asks ("anon" or [username] will be tagged)
yb3.zine - issues of the YB3 zine from Instagram
bbb.prompt - occasional prompts for interaction from the community
bbb.update - blog and project updates
bbb.reblog - posts reblogged from myself; largely unused now
bbb.flags - pride flags I've created
bbb.coining - terms I’ve coined
gender troubleshooting - gender-related questions and advice
gender of the day - highlighting gender terms with concise explanations on them
♡ This blog does not support:
Fakeclaiming, gatekeeping, and general bigotry toward marginalized communities.
TransID usage and radqueer identities.
Transmisogyny and MRA stances.
Proshipping, MAPs, and anti-recovery "pro-paraphilia" stances ("Proshipper" exclusively refers to incest and underaged shipping.)
Anti-religion, anti-spirituality, and religious extremism.
Anti-veganism and vegan extremism (By all means, critique the movement as needed.)
"Kinning" or KFFers.
Neutrality on any of these stances.
This is not a DNI and I don't block much. Just please do the best you can if you're going to be in this space. Also, I hold myself to the same standards. I need to be better too!
♡ I believe that all gender and orientation experiences are valid, and that people know themselves better than anyone else. They can use whatever labels make them feel safe and secure in their identities.
♡ This blog's focus is on inclusivity and positivity, and I will do my very best to uphold that whenever I post or respond to asks. Trolls will not be paid attention to, but I'll take the time to educate them whenever possible. Please let me know if you need a particular post tagged for whatever reason. I will try to use tone tags, but I often forget to do so. Just know that my tone is always in the range of /gen, /nm, and /pos. If you're going to interact with me directly, you will need to be accepting of tone tags. If tone tags are in your DNI, feel free to reblog or like my posts, but don't contact me.
♡ I don't believe in documenting every single thing a person has done wrong, particularly if this is not ongoing behavior and this person does not hold any power in the community (putting everyday people in a callout post is vastly different than putting a celebrity in a callout post, especially given the permanence of such a choice.) I believe in rehabilitation in conjunction with taking accountability. I believe that who a person is right now matters more than what they’d done in the past. If you’re doing your best and making an effort, then you’re welcome to interact, but there cannot be repeating bad behaviors. I hold myself to that as well!
♡ This blog was created as a space for me to better myself and contribute more to the queer community. I will never overstep boundaries because some people will (rightfully) be uncomfortable with my presence in this space and that's okay. I try my best to keep to myself here and continue posting informative content on multigender identities and others. I also plan to help archive coined terms because I believe queer history is important (even when the person contributing to its archival hasn't been a good person in the past.)
Note: Feel free to add my terms and their flags to wiki sites, Carrds, Instagram stories, Bluesky posts, and any other space meant to be informative. Please wait until a term is added to the YB3 Wiki before adding it to another website, if possible. Click here if you want to see a database on Drive of every flag I've ever made. If you requested a flag from me, it’s yours. That flag can be used, remade, and uncredited to your heart’s content. Please do not "recoin" or "reclaim" any of my terms. If it seems a term was coined with a bad definition, send me a message and we can discuss changing it.
♡ Thank you if you've read this far. Feel free to ask me anything at all about my genders or my experiences with queerness in general. I'm always here to enlighten and educate.
"Ningender (shortened to NIN) is an umbrella term for all genders which are neutral in nature (NIN). It can be used as an umbrella term for any genders that are primarily related to a gender quality that is not masculine or feminine. This includes genders such as neutrois, stellarian, maverique, and other unaligned/abinary/neutral aligned non-binary gender." -lgbtqia+ mirahezes ningender page
Ah. Okay. I was seeing it the other way around, where the maverique page had the wrong category placed on it. I didn't realize the ningender page was wrong as well. I've edited it. I think it might need to be shown to mods first before the changes are visible to everyone.
it's so strange to me that the miraheze lgbtqia+ wiki currently defines maverique as being an example of a ningender on the ningenders page
This site seems to be correct, which is the one you mentioned (LGBTQIA Miraheze.) This one (MOGAI Miraheze) was edited by me just now because it listed maverique as NIN. I forgot I have a Miraheze account and can edit pages wherever needed.
If you had meant a different Wiki, let me know and I can pop in and make some edits.
Hi! I saw your flags for proxvir and maverique, and juxera and maverique. I was wondering if you could do one that's all three? I'm pretty sure I'm trigender with all three so a flag would be really nice. No worries if not though! Thanks for everything you do!
Here are two versions! The light red and green are from the juxera and proxvir flags, and I added purple as a color that would sort of sit between the two.
For those who missed it, the above flags are in the style of these ones that I made for maverique proxvir and maverique juxera.
Is there a term or flag for vocorine or vocorian aligned? I was looking through the wiki and found myself heavily relating to most vocorian genders but then when i sat and thought about it… my genders aren’t VOCIN. My genders (currently) aren’t strongly felt, loud, intense or full, yet i find myself relating to vocorian anyway. I say currently since I’m fluix and there definitely have been times that my gender has been some of those things and i’ve been hypergendered before- but that was months ago and more recently i often find it hard to distinguish my genders at all and they’re definitely not strongly felt, but i almost feel like they’re meant to be i guess?? Or that’s it’s just some kind of vague connection to vocorinity. And i think vocorine-aligned would describe that pretty well. I think i explained that more than i needed to but yh is there a term/flag for vocorine or vocorian aligned since i like separating my genders and alignment flags^^
Also i love your blog, it’s given me a lot of knowledge on abinary and multigender identities and I’m really grateful for that and it’s helped me understand my own gender so much more :)
I seem to be one of the few sources for vocorian identities. I've seen others, but I haven't seen anything terms for alignment.
That being said, I think I want to coin some terms to fill that gap. I don't want to fully go back to coining, but having a term for being vocorian-aligned might help, since I made the effort to make in-nature and quality terms for vocorian.
Vocoric (left): A term for being vocorian-aligned. It uses the -ic ending seen in many other alignment terms such as mavric and aporic. The colors are softened versions of the colors seen in the original vocorian flag.
Capellaean (right:) A galactian alignment to describe being vocorian-aligned. The blue and yellow are taken from the vocorian flag, and the symbol represents all of space (and the swirl expands outwards like sound waves might move.) This term is named after Capella, the brightest star within the constellation Auriga.
I think all neutral proximals can be considered niaspec but not ningender. At least in my head it makes sense. Close to X, or comparable to X, but not X - that sounds like it would be -iaspec and not -ingender.
There are more non-ningender niaspec identities out there than I realized.
Would a droxinine gender be niaspec, but not necessarily ningender?
Huh. I suppose it would be. Dipherinities tend to be brand new qualities. Like, droxinine is the combination of neutral and masculine, but they combine in such a way that it's almost like a chemical reaction creating something new. The constituent parts sort of... transform? That's the impression I get at least. So, droxininity is a result of neutrality but not necessarily neutral-in-nature itself.
I guess an ainemine gender could be fiaspec, but not fingender?
That makes sense to me. Fiaspec would include terms that are comparable to femininity but are not intrinsically feminine themselves (feminine-in-nature.)
I wonder, what kinds of identities are niaspec but not ningender (if there are any out there)? That's what I'm on the search for.
niagender could be a thing, the ningender version of (l/m/f)iagender. and maybe xiagender as the xingender
I coined fia-/mia-/lia- to make it easier to say things like “women, nonbinary women, partial women, anyone who is woman-aligned/adjacent, or anyone with a FINgender” (the alternative, of course, being “fiaspec & FINgender people”). It seems like “Niagender Spectrum” would essentially be synonymous to (what I’ve been calling) the neutral (gender) spectrum. Same for xiaspec/xeno spec, aiaspec/apora spec, & agiaspec/agen spec.
That said, I do appreciate the uniformity, & their usage could help to differentiate terms by one spectrum being “genders which are [neutral/xenine/aporine/null]” and the other being (more broadly) “genders which are [x], partially [x], or [x]-aligned/adjacent.”
Here are the definitions I’d propose:
Niagender Spectrum / Niaspec: an umbrella term similar to NINgender for anyone on the “neutrally gendered” spectrum; anyone whose gender is neutral, partly neutral, or in some way similar to/resemblant of gender neutrality. Can also be used as a gender identity all on its own.
Xiagender Spectrum / Xiaspec: an umbrella term similar to XINgender for anyone on the “xenogendered” spectrum; it includes all xenogenders, partial xenogenders, and genders which are in some way similar to/resemblant of xeninity. Can also be used as a gender identity all on its own.
Aiagender Spectrum / Aiaspec: an umbrella term similar to AINgender for anyone on the “aporagendered” spectrum; it includes all aporagenders, partial aporagenders, and genders which are in some way similar to/resemblant of aporinity. Can also be used as a gender identity all on its own.
Agiagender Spectrum / Agiaspec: an umbrella term similar to AGINgender for anyone on the “genderless” spectrum; it includes anyone who does not have a gender, only partly or sometimes has a gender, or whose gender is in some way similar to/resemblant of genderlessness. Can also be used as a gender identity all on its own.
Can someone explain the difference between niagender and ningender? It says here that niagender is similar to ningender, so I would assume there's a distinction somehow.
Well, I guess if someone could explain -iagender versus -ingender in general, that would be great. I'm just focused on niagender because I'm researching it for something.
Dissimilar Gender or Gender Dissimilar: A gender distinct experience that is defined specifically by dissimilarity. This term can still include those who are unambiguous and have a defined sense of gendered certainty but it’s especially for those who experiences a firm sense of differentiation within one’s own gender(s). This can include those who are outherine, distincine, autonine, autonomine/iquine, yonderine and frankly any gender(s)/qualities that may be dissimiline in nature but one doesn’t necessarily have to be any of these to be Gender Dissimilar. Quality term is Dissimiline and for those who are gender dissimilar even when identifying as/with other gender/s could call oneself dissimgender.
You were right, I was basically trying to put two (slightly??) differing definitions into one term without realizing it and the singular definition kind of clash with each other because it🙂↕️🙏🏾. See, my experience with gender distinction (and specifically gender dissimilarity) is when distinct means dissimilar as well as meaning the definition for gender distinction you gave me in a previous ask but the dissimilar aspect is the most important aspect of my gender distinction and gender experience and see them as one of the same. But I do think it could have been defined better either way, and still wanting to get what I want my solution is to separating the two.
Gender Distinct will still be defined as experiencing your own gender/s in a defined, clear and distinct way. It would include any genders and qualities that are defined, unambiguous and have a strong and firm sense of gendered certainty and clarity (like genders/qualities such as maverine/maverique and aporine/aporagender for example). Quality and gender (distincine and distingender) are still the same but hopefully more clear.
But Gender Dissimilar would be what I was trying to get at in the first place: a specific experience with gender distinction/distincinity that can exist but certainly is not all there is to it. So thank you for pointing that out, I hadn’t realize it was giving mixed definitions until then (sorry if you pointed that out before I sometimes struggle with understanding things so😭😅) I also really love the flags you made beautiful as always, so thank you very much. Hopefully this is the last ask about this, I just wanted you to know that I heard you and again appreciate the feedback. Thanks again!
I'm just happy to help! You don't have to apologize. This is the fun part, getting to workshop a definition and finally get it exactly where you need it to be. I like these concepts a lot and I think they'd be very helpful for people.
To share my genderfluid experience I think to some degree I do feel somewhat agender at times but at the same time I don't want to express that and people getting the wrong idea. I'd rather think of it in a different way. I am chronically ill. Sometimes I get exhausted or it's hard to ignore my bodily symptoms and in those moments it's hard to connect to my gender.
So I refuse to say genderlessness is part of my fluidity, I FEEL that way in the moment. What's going on is that my gender IS there, its just buffering like a computer with the circle going loop over and over again. I's just loading, it might take an hour or two. You might have to restart the system first with a shower and medication but it'll get there eventually.
I like this explanation a lot! Sometimes I wonder if that's why I struggle with really feeling my gender on some days, because I deal a lot with fatigue nowadays. I don't feel an absence of gender, but I feel like it's a little harder to grasp than usual. Like trying to catch fog in my hands.
gyxqine :: gynine in an aqualitine way; paradoxically gynine & aqualitine (pronounced guy-ex-keen)
andxqine :: andrine in an aqualitine way; paradoxically andrine & aqualitine (pronounced and-ex-keen)
mavxqine :: maverine in an aqualitine way; paradoxically maverine & aqualitine (pronounced mav-ex-keen)
[image id: three 7-striped flags. the first is deep warm brown, medium yellow, dark yellow, medium coral, medium warm purple, dark ecru, and deep warm brown. the second is deep blue, pale seafoam, medium seafoam, dark teal, dark lavender, ecru, and deep blue. the third is deep warm brown, bright medium yellow, light yellow-orange, medium red-orange, dark dusty pink, dark ecru, and deep warm brown. end id.]
