Z™

I'm not okay (I promise) 18, she/they

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

First post!!

idk really know what to post, I'm just super fucking bored and it's like 5am, so get to know me I guess?

I'm Z™ (yes, it's trademarked) I use she/they, I'm non binary and bi:)

I love music, art, nature, and memes, so that's probably mainly what I'll be posting

As you can probably tell, I live in the Midwest, and I'm emo, I'm also graduating highschool this year, which i fucking hate (I don't wanna get older, it seems scary)

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

Retaking my road test today, let's hope I don't fuck it up again

I swear if I fail this time, I'm gonna sue

Idk who, so everybody better just watch out

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

Y'all, I did a stick n poke and I can't tell if I should go over it a few more times lol

Please let me know if you think it should be darker

Tw! Healed scars and a shitty tattoo lmao

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

r u 18+?

I'm 18 👍

[cosmikazie]

hey remember when people said we gotta keep talking about this and then two days passed and it just went quiet. anyways

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

!!!!!!

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

I GOT SOME CDS!!

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

Words cannot describe how much I love this song

ITS SO GOOD AND FUN RAHHHHHHH

[lttledog]

I Saw the TV Glow (2024), dir. Jane Schoenbrun.

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

It's not unprecedented for ppl to ID as nonbinary then realize theyre just women struggling against cishet-typical objectifications. My bsf was this way and so was her friend, both queer (one a lesbian girl who feels her girlhood differs from cishet girlhood still, one a bisexual). I think what's most important to keep in mind, no matter what you end up most comfortable with for yourself, is that there are still many nonbinary people who also don't feel dysphoria or do incidentally enjoy matching some of their AGAB's expectations.

And for most of us, there's still no escaping objectification if around shitty people, chest-related or otherwise—that's part of why trans and/or nonbinary people are extra fetishized, shunned, and at risk of corrective assault. Nonbinary people will always be taken even less seriously than binary trans people, since cis people generally have an easier time fathoming someone who's just a man or just a woman. It's dreadful and not a competition but just how it is, while all we can do is hold onto better connections.

And neutral titles (any title at all) can be for anyone. In sapphic community it's common for GNC binary women to go by they or he etc, and theres cis women who choose transmasc-like body changes, it's fine. People may still assume such a person is masc/nonbinary/whatever because sadly masc(ulinity) is a lot about what others conclude abt your exterior if being honest with ourselves but yeah.

Misgendering oneself is also kind of common—accidents happen, or we on purpose say what we have to for safety/privacy. I think this part matters less than what we decide for our full selves. Being a demigirl (or whatever other nonbinary and/or trans thing) isnt something that should be seen as childish esp when theres other adults, maybe even way older ones, under those labels. Anyone who'd shame you for that is far more naive and fall in a hole if incapable of learning.

And finally abt you wanting a different label—if you dislike the sound of demigirl and demifemme, how about nonbinary woman? It can mean the same or similar. Rebecca Sugar is a she/they adult nonbinary woman for example. Or nonbinary femme? Genderqueer? Idk what else to say on that part and this is clearly enough of a wordwall, but best of luck on your learning journey ♡ from someone whos been trans nonbinary for over nine years now

Holy shit, thank you so so so much. I think non binary women sounds correct, you are a legitimate life saver, may both sides of your pillow be forever cold 🙏

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

A rant about my gender, because this shit is confusing (if you have wisdom, please share it, I'm losing my fucking mind)

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sometimes I feel like I'm not actually non binary because sometimes I feel ok in my body, and I still feel connected to feminity. Sometimes I wonder if I just want to be treated like a person, not an object. Sometimes I wonder if I'd still want a flat chest if I wasn't sexualized for my body. But then again, I refer to myself with neutral titles, because it feels right. And I think about starting t, and getting top surgery, but not to be a man, or masc, just me. Sometimes I misgender myself, and I feel myself cringe, and a weird guilty feeling starts creeping in, like I'm lying to people. I'm not out to all of my friends, and I feel bad about it, but I don't want them to be weird when talking to me. I honestly just feel like a freak, and like I shouldn't be anything at all. I wish people understood what I am, but I can't even understand it. I know I don't need a label, but I want one. Demigirl and demifemme are the closest I've found, but neither feel right. And I don't want to walk around as an adult telling people I'm a demigirl, not only is it not quite correct, but i feel very childish saying it. I'm an adult, I should know what I am damn it 😭

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

Item: A Crumpled Manual Rarity: ⏶ Common

Do you skip tutorials as fast as you can?

Feed your dashboard by answering my question, blogger.

Most of the time I do, unless I have absolutely no clue what I'm doing

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

A meme dump because I am losing it 😭

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

Guys is this a good score??

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

I just turned 18, and I kinda hate it 😭

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

Guess who found the bathroom scale after it magically went missing??

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

I just cried my eyes out because my mom threw away trash in my room while I was gone, including monster cans I had saved for a project. I'm such a fucking baby and I hate myself for it

[yourlocalmidwestemo]

Anyone else feel like their getting too old for their bad habits?? Just me? Ok.....