Still, if it's not you, everything else won't matter.

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@yourpengirl-blogs
Still, if it's not you, everything else won't matter.
Did you ever feel like you're ready to die? Not because you've had enough, but because you're already contented.
What I'm saying is, I'm ready to let you go.
When I miss you, what's the best thing to do?
Hindi naman tayo nagkikita pero mamimiss pa rin kita. Palagi naman, 'di ba?
Ngayon ay isang malaking kasalanan na ang naising makita't makasama ka. Maaaring ito na ang ating hantungan, ang ating kapalaran na pinabayaan.
Maybe I shouldn't react to that. 바보. I guess there's still a big effect. Gosh, he takes my breath away as if everthing just happened yesterday. Dang.
*whispers*
“Eh ‘di next time...”
“I still find comfort when I think about you, though you’re not the source of my happiness anymore. What is the meaning of this thought?”
So glad that I inspired some people in my own little ways.
little ways to change your life:
learn how to write a new style of handwriting. try wearing your hair or makeup differently. find a new perfume you like.
do things for yourself, not for the validation of others. resist the temptation to post everything online.
start doing something you usually can't be bothered to do. like making your bed, folding everything neatly, stretching every hour, going on jogs, making a healthy meal from scratch or sleeping earlier.
make your surroundings as cozy and as pleasing for you to look at as possible.
bake delicious but sometimes deformed pastries. write things that no one "gets". wear clothes and hairstyles that make u happy. crotchet a sock badly. draw a picture that won't be aesthetic on instagram. let go of the perfect image of who you need to be. do things for yourself.
be messy. self-expression isn't always pretty. scribble messily in a notebook. draw messily an idea for a character. write a messy draft for a story.
learn your thing from scratch, whether it's astronomy, greek mythology, flower species, piano, japanese, making jam, drawing comics, or something completely different.
let yourself fully enjoy everyday things like food, commute, and your morning routines. slow down and notice every single thing that makes you feel nice.
appreciate nature, like the sunlight streaming through in the morning, the sound of rain, and the colors of sunsets.
notice the deeper meanings and emotions in songs, poetry and paintings.
let people in. give new loves and friendships a chance. initiate conversations when you want.
read as much as you can. read different genres, popular and unpopular books, classics and new releases. give every book that catches your eye a chance.
enjoy your solitude like you're a character in a movie. if you can, go out for walks alone. visit the park to look at dogs, a café to people-watch, or a library to spend the afternoon buried in a book. bring a journal everywhere with you, and write poetry and quotes and doodles.
collect little things, like vinyls, pretty rocks and shells, stuffed animals, whatever makes you happy.
find a sport you like. pretend you're a superhero. dance like no one's watching. swim like you're a mermaid. exercise is supposed to be fun, so find one that you like.
make self care a priority. this includes taking your meds on time, starting to study for a test after procrastinating for weeks, deleting things that trigger negative emotions, and knowing when to let go and ask for help.
distance yourself from sources of negativity. learn to be ok on your own. know your worth and boundaries.
let go of the past. forgive yourself for the things you regret and start again.
let go of old relationships. there's a difference between missing someone and wanting them back in your life.
let go of your need to be perfect. it does more harm than good.
never compare yourself. it will always feel like a losing battle, no matter how amazing you really are.
keep in touch with people you don't speak to much. even a message can brighten someone's day.
be kind to everyone you meet, even strangers. if someone makes you happy, make them happier. compliment often, and be less judgemental. give someone a smile, you never know how much it means to them.
wake up earlier in the morning. wake up with the sun and fall asleep with the moon.
if you want to be calmer and more productive, remove things on your phone and social media apps that you don't need. (which is most of them).
make a list of qualities in the person you dream of becoming. write about your ideal life with what you have. make goals to be the happiest and healthiest version of yourself.
don't suppress your emotions, but don't overthink them either. have a kinder relationship with your body and your thoughts.
don't be afraid to ask for help, whether it's a teacher, therapist, friend, doctor or parent.
remember that healing and loving yourself is just starting over and over. it's not too late. you're still young and you can move and grow at your own pace. your peak is yet to come.
Who would’ve thought that I could feel this kind of happiness again? No particular reason nor particular person. Just because I am.
"I’m sorry you had to deal with all the confusion, self-doubt and unanswered questions. The answer was simple; I had other things on my mind, we were not on the same page and I didn’t want to be the one you run to when you needed someone. I wanted you to feel how unreliable I was so you wouldn’t rely on me."
(c) Thought Catalog
“I love the way you love with all your heart. You’ve been hurt so many times, yet you still to present your newly-healed heart exposed and vulnerable each time. The world will tell you it’s stupid and naive, but it makes you stronger and I love you for it.”
— tara love / how could i not? (via ink-and-oceans)
My road to self-happiness is about to begin. You should wait for it.
The moment you cross my mind, I'll immediately shrug it off. That's my solution.
I Found Myself Messaging You Again
I pity myself for being this weak because of you. I can't put into words how much it makes me suffer 'cause loving you requires so much energy. It drains me every day to think that there's nothing to hold onto. I keep reaching out, but I just end up being disappointed. I knew it from the start, but I always justify it. I became a typical broken-hearted girl which I promised I will never become. It's because of you. You changed my world. You felt it, but you shrugged it off.
But you're right. Why would you waste your time on someone you don't even like? I want to cry, but tears are not coming out. I want to yell, but my mind is in so much pain. I want to go back to the time when we first met 'cause I might think twice if ever I will talk to you again.