shane: if i Do Everything Right Forever then i will never let my parents down more than i already have by being autistic and gay which is only forgivable and okay if i repent daily by Doing Everything Right Forever therefore proving to them and myself and everyone in montreal and maybe all of canada who revere me And everyone who hates me and wants me to fail and prove that i am whatever they think i am that i can exist correctly (if i just try hard enough and exert obsessive levels of control and discipline in every facet of my personal and professional life Which are the same thing btw) so maybe then i can earn the respect and love so freely given to me that i feel like i never deserved in the first place
his new therapist:
















