Sometimes I feel like I'm fucking worthless and don't deserve anything in life. Everything I post here is complete crap, something I want to get rid of. Everything irritates me, and it infuriates me about myself. I don't know what I want to achieve, and I'm tired of constantly being tired of just being tired. People have taken advantage of me my whole life, and yet, no one has ever left me without intentionally hurting me. I don't understand anything about this life. I want to do what I like, but no one likes it. So what's the point if everyone says I'm just an obsessive slut who bites her nails until they bleed from nerves? I'm tired of everything that's happening around me, and the most offensive thing is that I keep all my anger and pain inside, and I got used to it because if I had desire to splash out my emotions I always got punched in the face and was left with bruises. I don’t want to receive physical pain, and I’m used to receiving mental pain. But now I want to hit myself against the wall a couple of times because I'm tired of keeping everything inside, spending my whole life drawing how characters are happy, just trying to understand what it's like. I'm tired of losing my hair just from brushing and losing consciousness almost every other day. I'm tired of waking up with the taste of blood in my mouth and a nosebleed. I'm just tired. I want to do something that brings me pleasure, but in the end it only brings irritation and anger. I don't want to be "unique", I want to be like everyone else.
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