DND RECAP: the Beginning of the end
Cast consists of the following and is separated into two sessions
Rose: DM Alfie: Chicken looking birdfolk sorcerer warlock and is from a different universe Mark: human barbarian paladin Gorg: Goliath barbarian Patrick: changeling bard? with memory loss Luna: Elf (they fell victim to the false hydra) Quinn: wood elf Fluffy Scruffington: tabaxi Bob: Archfey NPC (Alfie made a deal with him)
So basically we're standing in front of the painting and Bob appears out of nowhere and pretty much says Hi and I'm like "SWEET MOTHER OF GOD, WHEN DID YOU GET THERE?!"
Bob just throws a smoke bomb and as the smoke clears we see him booking it to the museum exit and he trips and Gorg just busts through the door and hops straight into the painting.
I ask Hank (magical orb of memories that had some sort of say over reality) if the unicorns are the nice and pure hearted kind of the murderous blood thirsty kind and Hank says they're a bunch of cocky sons of bitches.
We all go in the painting and the first thing that we see is Spike who says "Hello welcome to Equestria-" and immediately gets golf clubbed by Gorg's hammer and is immediately killed.
And from the heavens we hear "HOME RUN!" Gorg has a new patron Wii Matt of Wii sports.
My little pony friendship is magic is a graphic novel series where Alfie is from, and Gorg has nightmares about the ponies.
We head into Ponyville and the first pony we meet is Princess Twilight Sparkle. Alfie sums up why we are here asks if there's a cemetery that we can grave rob and also asks her to sign his copies of the MLP graphic novels and leaves her with a bag of gems to pay for any damages. The Golden Oak library is still there.
Gorg sneaks off and spots Rarity. She turns screams and Gorg covers her mouth and kills her dragging the body behind the Carousel Boutique.
Fluttershy is behind the Carousel Boutique and has a panic attack, I chuck a health potion at Gorg and he shoves it down Rarity's throat. She is now extra dead. Mark turns Fluttershy to look at him telling her not to look and wraps his section staff around her snapping her neck. Meanwhile, Gorg was making a show of needing to get rarity help before breaking off her horn and both bodies are stashed away. The DM says "Mark a feeling of dread washes over you. He knows."
Alfie's making his way towards the cemetery and comes across sugar cube corner, popping into ask where the cemetery is and meeting Pinkie pie.
She's absolutely HYPED right now cuz NEW FRIEND.
Pinkie pie is positively vibrating especially since Alfie knows who she is and she has never met him before and he asks her if she wants to go grave robbing with him for some unicorn horns and she says yes.
Meanwhile, Gorg is covered in iridescent unicorn blood and jumps into the town squares fountain to clean it off, destroying the fountain in the process.
Mark decides to sample some of the pony blood and becomes a pony version of himself.
His cutie mark is the word "brisket"
Alfie and Pinkie rush outside to see What happened and now he's like "Hold up Mark is that you?" And Gorgs panicking because what happened to his friend and he does not trust ponies and Granny Smith ambles up to him like "Now now settle down. your friend's probably fine"
Gorg tries to trick Pinkie pie into coming down an alley with him all alone but Alfie brings up that she promised to go grave robbing with him and no pony breaks a promise.
Mark joins us on our trip to the ponyville graveyard.
Gorg stays behind and offers to give granny Smith a haircut.
Cursed shit insued
Gorg is at the fountain and Granny Smith has her back to him.
I have a better granny Smith impression than Rose so I'm roped into this.
Gorg accidentally pees on granny's head.
I panic and play the clueless old lady card and say "oh sugar. I didn't know you were going to give me a shampoo and rinse" and he hocks a loogie into her hair and rubs it in and discord is so disgusted by this that rewind time so it didn't happen and the only people who know that time has rewound are the party members.
Gorg ends up giving Granny Smith an emo haircut and she loves it cuz it reminds her of her rebellious days.
Cut to the graveyard where Pinkie is just desperate to give us cupcakes and I offer tradesies for my muffins and it's a deal she gives me the cupcakes and then she inhales the muffins tray and all and chokes to death.
Mark takes a bite out of Pinkie because the pony blood has made him hunger for more pony flesh and gains more power.
Discord's weakness is pee.
Alfie gets curious and samples some of the pony blood and becomes a pegasus pony minus the bloodlust cuz he scored high enough on the constitution save and only sampled a drop.
I do have bottles of various pony bloods now.
Cut back to Gorg who has opened a successful barber shop. Granny Smith is in the corner just feeling herself in the mirror.
Applejack gets in the hairdressing chair and ask Gorg if he can cut her hair and Gorg says "Yes. Do you consent to me taking a little off the top?" "Sure do, sugar cube." Gorg repeats the question two more times and Applejack says "yes now get on with cutting my hair sweet pea." And out of character Gorg says "I've asked her three times. I come from a different culture. Can this just be a culture dispute?" And Rose says yes.
Gorg chops off Applejack's head and adds her head to his belt.
He meets up with us at the graveyard and Alfie is just digging up graves and sawing off horns leaving flowers on graves as a way to say sorry for defiling your corpse. Muttering under his breath "it's going to be okay. It's going to be okay. Everything's going to be fine" because his childhood is getting more ruined than it already was
First grave we dug up was a fresh grave so of course Mark takes a bite out of the freshly buried body and becomes an alicorn because now he has the magic of all three pony tribes flowing through his veins.
Twilight shows up and Mark is like "Can you give me a hug? I could really use a hug." and she's like "you seem fine "and Alfie's just frantically shaking his head no. And Gorg says "Can I have a hug? My parents were killed by a cupcake." And she says "oh you poor thing of course!" and she gives him a hug and he hugs her to death.
Mark goes for the flank and then runs off on a blood lusted rampage heading to where Spike's body is and becomes a bat pony alicorn after feasting on his flesh.
Mark has jumped the shark
Alfie frantically goes searching for Rainbow Dash so she can warn the princesses about what's happening in Ponyville and finds her in her cloud house taking a nap and tells her 'Rainbow Dash we have to go to canterlot and warn the princesses. There's a bloodthirsty maniac on the loose! Your friends are dead!" And she goes "wait what?" and Mark gets a perfect 20 on an athletics check to see if he can kill Rainbow from wherever he is in ponyville she dies as a dagger pierces through the cloud and spears her in the gut.
At this point Mark is summoned to the graveyard face to face with Discord. Who is pissed off that he has killed his Fluttershy.
Alfie was going to fly to Canterlot to warn the Princesses himself. But the party is the only family he has left. He can't just abandon them and he's just muttering to himself that he wishes he could give Discord some spells that way he can bring Fluttershy back.
Gorg will remember this.
Discord has sobered mark up and Mark has no memory of what happened.
Mark wants to make a deal with Bob and Bob. Shows up out of nowhere and says hey Dad to Discord cuz Discord is his father.
There is nothing Bob can do and Discord gives us two options. Either we fight him or we travel to the afterlife to get Fluttershy's soul back I present an alternative option which would be to use my book to save her in her last moments but my campaign members choose fight Discord. The fight begins at dawn.
Gorg essentially ascends because he broke whatever pact he had with Kratos.
Gorg is no longer with the party, we all get a plus 4 on attack rolls.
End of that session
Next session Patrick, Quinn and Luna join us and they get a recap of what happened.
We are all ponies now.
When we first met Patrick, Mark told him that they were best friends and Patrick went along with it.
Patrick, upon hearing what happened, loudly wonders why they're friends in the first place.
Everyone chews out Mark and Alfie heads off to the Golden oak library cuz He wants to see if there are any new spells he can learn from there and also wants to check out the basement. He takes some of the books and we all head to the basement and see the Cutie Mark Crusaders who are plotting some new way to earn their cutie marks.
Today they're going to help Big Mac on the farm but little do they know Big Mac is dead, Applejack is dead, Granny Smith is dead. The first thing Alfie says when he sees them is "DON'T GO OUTSIDE" and He blocks the doorway and we have to break the news all their sisters are dead their families are just dead. Mark and I deceive them into thinking that there was just some completely unrelated alicorn psychopath that went on the loose and that discord is taking care of the alicorn psychopath at dawn and we make the decision to send them off to Appaloosa so Braeburn can take care of them while we sort everything else out.
We bribe them with cupcakes to make sure that they keep their eyes closed so they don't get extra traumatized. And as we see them off, the sun rises and we're all teleported by Discord to the battleground.
Patrick and Luna back out of the fight because this is kind of Mark's fault despite the fact that he was in an amnesia inducing frenzy and Alfie is conflicted because on one hand Mark is his closest friend. He's the first person he met in this universe. The closest thing he has to family now. But ultimately he decides to do the right thing and prevent even more suffering and death by going to the afterlife and retrieving the mane six with the rest of the party.
Mark summons Bob the Archfey saying that he wants to make a deal with him.
For his soul, name and memories of his little sister he makes this deal: If he kills Discord, I will be freed from my pact, we are free to leave the fey wilds, and have more of the supplies we need for that interdimensional portal book. If Mark perishes in this battle between him and Discord, he will essentially become a husk of his former self as an undead soldier for Bob.
Alfie and Mark share a heartfelt goodbye knowing this could be the last time they ever see each other. Mark gives Alfie his cloak as a memento, share a hug and Alfie gives him a salute and jumps into the hole that leads to the afterlife the other party members following after him leaving Mark to battle Discord solo.
In the afterlife colors are inverted it looks like ponyville but everything's off. Patrick approaches a background pony asking where the main six are and they turn around with white glowing eyes and screech at them before slowly turning their head back to the other pony they were talking to.
We venture further into this twisted town and see Applejack talking to Rarity, we say hey and Applejack's head just falls off and lands at our hooves. "Sorry sugar cube it happens sometimes" and we break the news to her that that wasn't normal. Everyone in ponyville is dead except for the CMC and we can get you back to the land of the living.
Then we go to Princess Twilight and she says "Ugh. It's you." And Alfie profusely apologizes saying that if he knew that that would happen he would have just come here by himself and not to worry cuz the OG killer is no longer with us. He ascended. She casts a spell on her vocal cords to project her voice and tells everyone to head to the green portal on the hill.
On a very distant hill is a flash of lightning revealing a silhouette of something reptilian with six heads that is very familiar to Alfie.
It's a false hydra. The false hydra that they fought in the third session. Alfie tries to tell Twilight about it and she just says "what false hydra?"
Alfie splits up from the rest of the group to get Rainbow Dash who's currently looking for Scootaloo. After talking to Rainbow Dash and letting her know that scootaloo is okay, Bob appears by his side at which Alfie has a couple of questions, the first of which being how the heck he keeps appearing out of nowhere and that that's a bad idea to do to someone who has PTSD cuz that might get you stabbed and the second being "Why did you make a deal with me?"
"Because you reek of foreign magic and frankly I want to dissect you"
"Surprisingly, that's not the first time someone has said that to me. The dissection part that is."
"Really?" "Yep. Uhhhh see ya." And Alfie just books it to Fluttershy's cottage.
I am so hyped for the next session.
