zeroslashsix

a casual sci fi sideblog. Mass Effect, Shakarian, but also happy to ship anything Shepard/AnyHappinessTheyCanGetInThisDamnedGalaxy. X-Men. Ben 10 possibly. Will mostly be used to organize stuff/updates for my fanfic. She/her/they

[zeroslashsix]

My Serious Media Analysis thoughts on Avatar: Fire and Ash are elsewhere, but it's genuinely so funny how desperate that movie is to convince us Blue Quaritch is hot in a Traditionally American Masculine Way. James Cameron didn't have to give male Na'vi the limb and waist proportions of an oddly-drawn yaoi protagonist, but that was what he decided to do, and so now we've got the visual effects department screaming "No no you don't understand! Quaritch is a manly catboy with a slim and unbreedable waist! You can tell because of how shirtless and oily he is!"

[parkchanwoohoo]

James Cameron's mind fascinates me, at least what little I can see from the Avatar movies (I have not googled his biography). He loves nature so much. He also loves military shit so much, and must have struggled to reconcile this in a somewhat Kojima sense. It seems he "cares about" indigenous people in so much as they are, to his mind as far as I can tell from Avatar, closer to nature than white people. He fucking loves whales so much. His biggest wish is to go back in time and give indigenous people machine guns so that they can fight white people and everyone (especially him) can live lives closer to nature. It is astonishingly condescending and also completely, childishly sincere. At once a little boy and a cynical old man. The movies read to me as he fucking loved the Tarzan books growing up, or maybe he wished he could have been Tarzan and do a better job of it and never leave the jungle. Fascinates me

[parkchanwoohoo]

GOD. YEAH. A LOT OF THAT.

Again, totally just operating out of armchair Avatar psychoanalysis without taking even a gander at his wiki page. His hierarchy of respect seems to be 1) Nature 2) Beings close to nature 3) Beings who protect 1 and 2. He seems to put Good Men in category 3, taking on traditional patriarchal roles of protection and employing martial knowledge in the service of Nature and its envoys. His secret hopes seem to be that if a man is good enough at 3, he can, through earning respect, climb to category 2 where the women and indigenous people are. Again, deeply sincere and deeply ridiculous. A desire so naked it hardly feels like I'm even doing armchair psychoanalysis so much as restating explicit themes

[luidilovins]

The Youtuber Native Media Theory covers a lot of these topics about how James Cameron views indigenous people in depth I highly suggest you check out his video.

[zeroslashsix]

This is because the core story of Avatar, its intention and foundation, is the same as your whitebread romance novel. It's why ACOTAR and Fourth Wing sell so well but at the same time so many media analysts shout their dismay at poor writing, at stereotypes, patronization and Mary Sue protagonists. They are the authors' inner fantasies written down and sold to the masses. They are not designed for impact, positivity, worldbuilding, nor are they genuine attempts to pursuade the audience to save whales or earnestly fund and legislate conservation. They are the creator's innermost daydreams, polished and distributed. Daydreams sell. They sell well. It's the reason romance is the most profitable genre to write in, no matter how poor its themes or worldbuilding, no matter how many stereotypes it perpetuates or odd beliefs soak through the author's work.

The only remarkability here is just the fact that James Cameron, a white man so successful that he has the freedom to cook up whatever story he wishes, can access hundreds of millions of dollars to create his own romance novel and then distribute it to wider audiences than the average romantasy author can even dream of. It's a white man's Fourth Wing.

[zeroslashsix]

Ben 10: Alien Force

I think Kevin is my favorite part of B10:AF and beyond, not necessarily because of Kevin himself, but because his friendship makes the other two look completely insane. Yeah they become friends in episode one, but Kevin doesn't have a redemption arc. His turning point is "Don't work with the DNAliens specifically" but he absolutely continues to do crime.

Ben: I want to save the world and also have a good time.

Gwen: I want to protect my cousin and also get into a good college.

Kevin: I want to commit tax fraud on earth and also in space.

They hang out because they just like each other and Kevin has a car, but I cannot stress enough that Kevin very much continues his illegal activities. If the Tennysons catch him doing it they'll grumble "Really, Kevin? Smuggling illegal chemicals?" as if he just dropped some trash and didn't pick it up. Ben and Gwen are crazy for keeping him around, I love it. Yeah that's our friend Kevin, he's chill. He has some personality quirks and some of those quirks are felonies, but hey, when you're friends you overlook stuff.

"Hey where's Kevin at? We gotta stop the war on this alien planet."

"Oh he's increasing hostilities so he can sell weapons to both sides."

"... Yeah that sounds like Kevin. Anyway-"

[zeroslashsix]

Can’t believe I forgot the episode where Kevin straight up kills a man. Not in self-defense, either. He fully and intentionally pushes a dude off a spaceship to his death. I’m pretty sure Ben and Gwen are on the ground looking up at it. Like, they fully see this happen. And when Kevin joins them on the ground, he’s like, “That bad guy won’t bother us anymore.” And the Tennysons’ response is just “Man tonight was exhausting. We really need to go home and get some sleep.”

[zeroslashsix]

Wait wait wait, you know what little character detail makes this whole thing even funnier?

Kevin’s deep-seated desire to be a Plumber.

Y’all remember that episode where the trio have to go to Plumber school to make all the alien-fighting legal, and Kevin takes it super seriously because he legit wants to be a space cop. This dude spent years stealing the space-catalytic-converters out of ships and dreaming to himself, “Man, my perfect job would be to enforce the law.”

And he. He was deputized. I’m 90% he and the Tennysons were all given Plumber authority after they completed school. And then Kevin goes RIGHT BACK to doing crime.

Could you imagine being an alien who dropped onto earth accidentally, no big deal, this human kid says he knows how to get the parts you need to get going. Except the kid scams you, steals parts from your ship, and so you reach out to the nearest plumber to report the crime. Except sike, the nearest plumber is the guy who just scammed you! Well shit, you gotta call the second closest plumber to report this scumbag. Except the second plumber who shows up is the scammer’s best friend. Shit. Fine. Third closest plumber then. Except she shows up and it’s the scammer’s girlfriend.

[shortkinglogan]

ThpThpThpThpThpThp

[zeroslashsix]

X-Men TAS S2 Ep5 "Repo Man"

Ok so just got to the Alpha Flight vs Wolverine episode, and why the hell is Vindicator SO PRESSED about Wolverine leaving? The vibes Wolverine is having with this married couple are unhinged, this is in no way a work-appropriate response on Vindicator's part. And no one else on the team is behaving this way. The rest of Alpha Flight is all "You were one of us, we miss you, we want you back on the team" but also they're following Vindicator's orders to hunt down a previous teammate and force him to be on the team again, all the while Vindicator is screaming "You left us for ANOTHER TEAM! What do the X-Men have that we don't?? You deserve the Torture Machine because you LEFT US."

Meanwhile his wife is gently tending Wolverine's pain as she operates the Torture Machine, because she wanted it to be as soft as possible for his sake, and no touch could be softer than hers. All the while we keep getting flashbacks of husband and wife finding the feral Wolverine after the Weapon X program, nursing him back to health, and taming his wild nature with their love and affection. It's mostly Heather in the flashbacks, so it seemed like a setup for jealousy and/or a love triangle, but no. We find out later that Vindicator was also gently taming Wolverine's wild nature with his love and affection.

I don't usually jump to shipping people outside of canon, especially not pre-2000s shows where I don't think the writers intended shipping, but this is absurd. Vindicator is not responding in a normal way, and nobody else is responding like this. They're a foil for Scott and Jean, right? They have to be. Team leader husband married to sweet and compassionate wife. But like... Vindicator/Heather/Wolverine had to be an actual throuple. There's no way a rational person would react this way to their coworker finding opportunities elsewhere. And no one else in the episode is reacting this way, it's literally just Vindicator getting so mad. This man, Scott's foil, is acting like Wolverine cheated with Scott by joining the X-Men.

Which like. what is this trying to say about the Scott/Jean/Logan triangle. Or the fact Logan keeps a hidden picture of both Scott and Jean, in a 90s superhero show. Did the writers do this deliberately? They. they had to know what they were implying, right? And this episode was them doubling down on "polyamorous king Wolverine."

[zeroslashsix]

Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s Mabelline. But this is the cover of Vindicator’s first comic appearance.

[zeroslashsix]

I thought the comics would be a bit more platonic but I WAS WAS WRONG. The original source material is EVEN HORNIER.

What is this conversation. What the hell is Logan saying. What the hell is SHE saying.

“Yes Logan you’ve called me sexy many times. Yes I know you are aroused by my anger. Please please please go talk to my husband so the three of us can be together again.”

[zeroslashsix]

GNAWING AT TJE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE

Wolvicator let me go. Wolvicator I already believe in you its ok you don’t have to convince me Wolvicator

"They nursed him back to health, accepted him, loved him. And he loved them in return."

[zeroslashsix]

Alright, this is officially becoming my master post of Wolvicather content, because one day, many years from now, someone’s going to ask “Wait you ship Wolverine/Vindicator/Heather??? Why would you do that” and I will show them my source material

Because what do you MEAN Logan left to protect them from himself. What do you MEAN they begged him to stay. Why is this so romantic for no reason

Edit: issue is Uncanny 147

[zeroslashsix]

X-Men TAS S2 Ep5 "Repo Man"

Ok so just got to the Alpha Flight vs Wolverine episode, and why the hell is Vindicator SO PRESSED about Wolverine leaving? The vibes Wolverine is having with this married couple are unhinged, this is in no way a work-appropriate response on Vindicator's part. And no one else on the team is behaving this way. The rest of Alpha Flight is all "You were one of us, we miss you, we want you back on the team" but also they're following Vindicator's orders to hunt down a previous teammate and force him to be on the team again, all the while Vindicator is screaming "You left us for ANOTHER TEAM! What do the X-Men have that we don't?? You deserve the Torture Machine because you LEFT US."

Meanwhile his wife is gently tending Wolverine's pain as she operates the Torture Machine, because she wanted it to be as soft as possible for his sake, and no touch could be softer than hers. All the while we keep getting flashbacks of husband and wife finding the feral Wolverine after the Weapon X program, nursing him back to health, and taming his wild nature with their love and affection. It's mostly Heather in the flashbacks, so it seemed like a setup for jealousy and/or a love triangle, but no. We find out later that Vindicator was also gently taming Wolverine's wild nature with his love and affection.

I don't usually jump to shipping people outside of canon, especially not pre-2000s shows where I don't think the writers intended shipping, but this is absurd. Vindicator is not responding in a normal way, and nobody else is responding like this. They're a foil for Scott and Jean, right? They have to be. Team leader husband married to sweet and compassionate wife. But like... Vindicator/Heather/Wolverine had to be an actual throuple. There's no way a rational person would react this way to their coworker finding opportunities elsewhere. And no one else in the episode is reacting this way, it's literally just Vindicator getting so mad. This man, Scott's foil, is acting like Wolverine cheated with Scott by joining the X-Men.

Which like. what is this trying to say about the Scott/Jean/Logan triangle. Or the fact Logan keeps a hidden picture of both Scott and Jean, in a 90s superhero show. Did the writers do this deliberately? They. they had to know what they were implying, right? And this episode was them doubling down on "polyamorous king Wolverine."

[zeroslashsix]

Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s Mabelline. But this is the cover of Vindicator’s first comic appearance.

[zeroslashsix]

I thought the comics would be a bit more platonic but I WAS WAS WRONG. The original source material is EVEN HORNIER.

What is this conversation. What the hell is Logan saying. What the hell is SHE saying.

“Yes Logan you’ve called me sexy many times. Yes I know you are aroused by my anger. Please please please go talk to my husband so the three of us can be together again.”

[zeroslashsix]

GNAWING AT TJE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE

Wolvicator let me go. Wolvicator I already believe in you its ok you don’t have to convince me Wolvicator

"They nursed him back to health, accepted him, loved him. And he loved them in return."

[zeroslashsix]

Ben 10: Alien Force

I think Kevin is my favorite part of B10:AF and beyond, not necessarily because of Kevin himself, but because his friendship makes the other two look completely insane. Yeah they become friends in episode one, but Kevin doesn't have a redemption arc. His turning point is "Don't work with the DNAliens specifically" but he absolutely continues to do crime.

Ben: I want to save the world and also have a good time.

Gwen: I want to protect my cousin and also get into a good college.

Kevin: I want to commit tax fraud on earth and also in space.

They hang out because they just like each other and Kevin has a car, but I cannot stress enough that Kevin very much continues his illegal activities. If the Tennysons catch him doing it they'll grumble "Really, Kevin? Smuggling illegal chemicals?" as if he just dropped some trash and didn't pick it up. Ben and Gwen are crazy for keeping him around, I love it. Yeah that's our friend Kevin, he's chill. He has some personality quirks and some of those quirks are felonies, but hey, when you're friends you overlook stuff.

"Hey where's Kevin at? We gotta stop the war on this alien planet."

"Oh he's increasing hostilities so he can sell weapons to both sides."

"... Yeah that sounds like Kevin. Anyway-"

[zeroslashsix]

Can’t believe I forgot the episode where Kevin straight up kills a man. Not in self-defense, either. He fully and intentionally pushes a dude off a spaceship to his death. I’m pretty sure Ben and Gwen are on the ground looking up at it. Like, they fully see this happen. And when Kevin joins them on the ground, he’s like, “That bad guy won’t bother us anymore.” And the Tennysons’ response is just “Man tonight was exhausting. We really need to go home and get some sleep.”

[zeroslashsix]

Ben 10: Alien Force

I think Kevin is my favorite part of B10:AF and beyond, not necessarily because of Kevin himself, but because his friendship makes the other two look completely insane. Yeah they become friends in episode one, but Kevin doesn't have a redemption arc. His turning point is "Don't work with the DNAliens specifically" but he absolutely continues to do crime.

Ben: I want to save the world and also have a good time.

Gwen: I want to protect my cousin and also get into a good college.

Kevin: I want to commit tax fraud on earth and also in space.

They hang out because they just like each other and Kevin has a car, but I cannot stress enough that Kevin very much continues his illegal activities. If the Tennysons catch him doing it they'll grumble "Really, Kevin? Smuggling illegal chemicals?" as if he just dropped some trash and didn't pick it up. Ben and Gwen are crazy for keeping him around, I love it. Yeah that's our friend Kevin, he's chill. He has some personality quirks and some of those quirks are felonies, but hey, when you're friends you overlook stuff.

"Hey where's Kevin at? We gotta stop the war on this alien planet."

"Oh he's increasing hostilities so he can sell weapons to both sides."

"... Yeah that sounds like Kevin. Anyway-"

[zeroslashsix]

X-Men TAS S2 Ep5 "Repo Man"

Ok so just got to the Alpha Flight vs Wolverine episode, and why the hell is Vindicator SO PRESSED about Wolverine leaving? The vibes Wolverine is having with this married couple are unhinged, this is in no way a work-appropriate response on Vindicator's part. And no one else on the team is behaving this way. The rest of Alpha Flight is all "You were one of us, we miss you, we want you back on the team" but also they're following Vindicator's orders to hunt down a previous teammate and force him to be on the team again, all the while Vindicator is screaming "You left us for ANOTHER TEAM! What do the X-Men have that we don't?? You deserve the Torture Machine because you LEFT US."

Meanwhile his wife is gently tending Wolverine's pain as she operates the Torture Machine, because she wanted it to be as soft as possible for his sake, and no touch could be softer than hers. All the while we keep getting flashbacks of husband and wife finding the feral Wolverine after the Weapon X program, nursing him back to health, and taming his wild nature with their love and affection. It's mostly Heather in the flashbacks, so it seemed like a setup for jealousy and/or a love triangle, but no. We find out later that Vindicator was also gently taming Wolverine's wild nature with his love and affection.

I don't usually jump to shipping people outside of canon, especially not pre-2000s shows where I don't think the writers intended shipping, but this is absurd. Vindicator is not responding in a normal way, and nobody else is responding like this. They're a foil for Scott and Jean, right? They have to be. Team leader husband married to sweet and compassionate wife. But like... Vindicator/Heather/Wolverine had to be an actual throuple. There's no way a rational person would react this way to their coworker finding opportunities elsewhere. And no one else in the episode is reacting this way, it's literally just Vindicator getting so mad. This man, Scott's foil, is acting like Wolverine cheated with Scott by joining the X-Men.

Which like. what is this trying to say about the Scott/Jean/Logan triangle. Or the fact Logan keeps a hidden picture of both Scott and Jean, in a 90s superhero show. Did the writers do this deliberately? They. they had to know what they were implying, right? And this episode was them doubling down on "polyamorous king Wolverine."

[zeroslashsix]

Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s Mabelline. But this is the cover of Vindicator’s first comic appearance.

[zeroslashsix]

I thought the comics would be a bit more platonic but I WAS WAS WRONG. The original source material is EVEN HORNIER.

What is this conversation. What the hell is Logan saying. What the hell is SHE saying.

“Yes Logan you’ve called me sexy many times. Yes I know you are aroused by my anger. Please please please go talk to my husband so the three of us can be together again.”

[zeroslashsix]

I absolutely love Kurt wearing big sunglasses inside to hide his eyes, as if that’s the biggest feature someone might recognize him by.

Kurt. Sweetiebruh. Is there perhaps another physical feature that might give you away.

[zeroslashsix]

XMenEvo Lancitty fic

if y'all would care for a bite.

TBH I have never had any strong feelings about Lancitty ever, positive or negative, so it's an interesting exercise to write them as the main couple for an 'episode' fic. They're my two little bugs in a jar, and the more I write them, the more fascinated I become. Super interested to see if Lancitty fans enjoy it.

Catstone - Chapter 1 - laughingcatdog - X-Men - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

Fandom: X-Men Evolution

Pairings: Kitty Pryde/Lance Alvers, Rogue/Remy Lebeau, Kurt Wagner/Amanda Sefton, Scott Summers/Jean Grey

Word Count: 9k

Summary: Kitty has... a lot to deal with. Lance also has a lot to deal with. Her parents, the New York reporter tearing through Bayville, new high school principal, Magneto getting philosophical. And if they work together, maybe they can deal with it all in that order. (Theoretical X-Men Evo season 5, episode 2)

[zeroslashsix]

X-Men TAS S2 Ep5 "Repo Man"

Ok so just got to the Alpha Flight vs Wolverine episode, and why the hell is Vindicator SO PRESSED about Wolverine leaving? The vibes Wolverine is having with this married couple are unhinged, this is in no way a work-appropriate response on Vindicator's part. And no one else on the team is behaving this way. The rest of Alpha Flight is all "You were one of us, we miss you, we want you back on the team" but also they're following Vindicator's orders to hunt down a previous teammate and force him to be on the team again, all the while Vindicator is screaming "You left us for ANOTHER TEAM! What do the X-Men have that we don't?? You deserve the Torture Machine because you LEFT US."

Meanwhile his wife is gently tending Wolverine's pain as she operates the Torture Machine, because she wanted it to be as soft as possible for his sake, and no touch could be softer than hers. All the while we keep getting flashbacks of husband and wife finding the feral Wolverine after the Weapon X program, nursing him back to health, and taming his wild nature with their love and affection. It's mostly Heather in the flashbacks, so it seemed like a setup for jealousy and/or a love triangle, but no. We find out later that Vindicator was also gently taming Wolverine's wild nature with his love and affection.

I don't usually jump to shipping people outside of canon, especially not pre-2000s shows where I don't think the writers intended shipping, but this is absurd. Vindicator is not responding in a normal way, and nobody else is responding like this. They're a foil for Scott and Jean, right? They have to be. Team leader husband married to sweet and compassionate wife. But like... Vindicator/Heather/Wolverine had to be an actual throuple. There's no way a rational person would react this way to their coworker finding opportunities elsewhere. And no one else in the episode is reacting this way, it's literally just Vindicator getting so mad. This man, Scott's foil, is acting like Wolverine cheated with Scott by joining the X-Men.

Which like. what is this trying to say about the Scott/Jean/Logan triangle. Or the fact Logan keeps a hidden picture of both Scott and Jean, in a 90s superhero show. Did the writers do this deliberately? They. they had to know what they were implying, right? And this episode was them doubling down on "polyamorous king Wolverine."

[zeroslashsix]

Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s Mabelline. But this is the cover of Vindicator’s first comic appearance.

[zeroslashsix]

The more fanfic I write for XMenEvo, the more enamored I become with the idea of Lance as an omega mutant, or at least growing into one as an adult. Because his powers aren’t exactly useless in a fight, but they are the least useful when compared to agility, super speed, super strength, etc. He can affect the environment, but if someone is trying to punch him, all he can really do is make them fall down or just make the ground extra difficult to move across. He can and will 100% punch a dude in the face, but that’s nothing to do with his powers. But he can lower several city blocks halfway underground like he helped Jean control that explosion that one time, and he can make giant fissures in the earth, it’s just like… you can’t really block a bullet with those skills, or stop someone who really really wants to get at you.

Idk, I just really like the idea of a mutant whose powers cannot help in a close quarters fight, but are absolutely devastating to the surrounding environment. Like maybe Grown Up Evo Lance can’t throw rocks at you, but he can move the tectonic plates under your feet, which could cause mass casualties beyond the fight. Or a max-powered Lance could just like… detach Florida from the US and move it somewhere else. Not by picking it up or anything, just making the continent itself shift.

[witchyleehibernates]

I want X-Men headcanons. I want Scott headcanons, Jean, Jubilee, Storm, Morph, Logan, Gambit, Kurt, Rogue. I want all the headcanons. Ship headcanons, the X-Men as family headcanons, duo headcanons, ECT... Even holiday headcanons.

I would like them all please.

All of them.

[zeroslashsix]

Jean and Remy always struggle to see eye to eye on matters of the kitchen (especially with spices), but it gets especially rampant at Christmastime. They have an unspoken tradition of super passive-aggressive gifts that each must recieve with joy and smiles. Ex:

Remy: Been waitin' all year to give you this, chere -- an entire industrial-sized tub of cayenne pepper, just for you!

Jean: Oh, wonderful, it goes so well with my gift for you! Look, a whole gallon of sour cream! We can mix them <3

Jean makes potato salad with raisins. Remy 'accidentally' drops it like "So sorry chere, just been super clumsy today is all, cookin' good food, you know how it is."

Jean smiles through gritted teeth and says "No it's fine, I've been totally clumsy today too!" and telekinetically throws all the raisins into Remy's gumbo.

Scott and Rogue share a knowing look and move the rest of the food to a secondary location.

[zeroslashsix]

Thank god Tim Walz drives a Honda Accord, because if by some coincidence he drove a Honda Odyssey then I’m pretty sure this timeline would collapse.

[zeroslashsix]

Did someone say SAVAGE LAND ROGUE?

[zeroslashsix]

Finished fic!

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Fandom: X-Men: Evolution

Pairings: Rogue/Gambit, trace elements of Kitty Pryde/Piotr Rasputin

Word count: 41k

Summary:  Gambit's plans go awry, and Rogue is all too happy to get some payback. The X-Men worry that Magneto is gathering his forces, but Kitty feels bad about fighting a guy as nice as Colossus. With Jean off to college, the now-graduated Scott struggles to plan for the X-Men's future. (Theoretical season 5 episode 1, because we all wanted more Evo.)