YESSSS IM UNSURE IF YOU REMEMBER ME BUT I USED TO READ ALL OF UR FICS!!!! I'm so so glad to hear about you again after all these years I've been waiting đ«¶đ«¶đ«¶ I'm so glad to hear you're getting better, please take your time but I'm so happy to hear news about you! you were one of the main reasons i started writing!!!! Hope you have an amazing week!!!
Hi! Yes I remember you!! đ It's really nice to see some people from a few years ago are still around and remember me ><
Wish you the best of luck with your writing journey đ Have a great November ahead of you!
Idk if you had this ask or someone just saying u have a really good writing and what's the secret, but I AM completely, hypnotized and everything just because of one of your fics, which I am trying to read and I am surprised you can write so long fic, that describes passionately. Really makes me taken aback, how you got that level of writing?? That's like mysterious secret?
Hi! Haha yes I've gotten a lot of feedback over the years but I never really tire of them đ
Hmm with the length of my fics, I honestly don't think of it as an achievement. I've always struggled to keep things short and sweet? I admire people who can write things that are short but it still feels cohesive and complete. IRL I like to explain things with detail so that my point is clear and understood. You can probably see it w/ this ask. That probably translated to my writing style too.
I think with my writing, in general, it just naturally improved overtime. I started writing when I was 10? I'm in my early 20s now, so I'd like to hope I've gotten better! đ
Reading a lot helps too. I am always reading. Not just fanfics, I read everything: fiction books of different reading levels, poetry, non-fiction like history, the news, articles by professional or aspiring writers on smth like medium or substack. I tend to take note of how things are phrased, and why the author did it. The purpose of why is really important to know, it's not so wise to just copy another author's style without understanding why it works well in their work, yk?
Not to say that I don't do light, turn-your-brain-off reading, but I keep a balance. It's also just good for your brain to consume slowly and thoughtfully sometimes.
But yeah, read a lot, consume media! It's the same concept as when you talk to someone a lot you subconsciously copy some of their verbiage đ
in response to your dynamics/trope post for ace... i've been brainrotting over epic the musical recently so maybe a play where ace and yuu get the leads? ace spending the whole time losing his shit over having to act romantic with yuu when he's already heads over heels sounds like the perfect quota for ace being a yearning loser that you mentioned you wanted hehehe
The moment I read "play" it was like a sleeper agent woke up in me bc I love theatre, I love musicals! I'm kinda a loser but very proud! đ
(And I miss A3! EN if anyone still knows the underrated gacha đ Miss Izumi... Tasuku... Tsuzuru... Banri... the troupes... I miss u all...)
I do see the yearning loser potential here... hmm...
And I also already have that short theatre AU fic with sebek... so it's not like this would be out of the ordinary or difficult for me to write... and I have enough knowledge with theatre that I can whip smth up... hmmm... đ€
(Also omg Epic the Musical I haven't listened to all the released songs but the ones I have listened to are fire)
itâs so good to hear from you again ! not a mutual but a long time follower. your writing was what helped me get back into twst and also inspired me to start writing again myself. im glad you took time for yourself and sorry it also came with a lot of issues on your end too. hereâs to hoping on your good health, please take care of yourself and dont feel too pressured to abruptly get back into the swing of things. thereâs so much content tho that i hope youâll personally have fun sinking your teeth into !
Yes don't worry about me I try to prioritize my health first above all! And also because I have people who will probably get mad at me if I don't hehe đ€
But it's really so touching to hear that my writing can inspire others. I've been writing fanfics since I was 10, and it's so wild to me to think a decade and some years later I could ever be in a position to have people like my works to that extent đđ„č
I'm catching up on what I've missed with TWST slowly but surely. Although a bit sad I couldn't be there for events/card drops I'm also trying to get over that and focus on having all this content to explore!
I wish you the best of luck with your writings yourself đ Although idk who you are I'm cheering you on đ
i've been on hiatus too so it's been EONS since i've really said or done anything publicly on here but IT'S SO GOOD TO HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN NATHYA!!!! this'll be so awkward if you don't remember me (/j) but it's amazing to see you back, even if only briefly for now oâ (â (â *â ^â âœâ ^â *â )â )â o
sending you so much love and support, it's wonderful to see you again <3 â hallow đ
HALLOW are you kidding ofc I remember you âŒïž Your iconic username aside and the pink that I associated with u, I remember getting tagged by you in those tag games (I'm not sure what they're called) and always being happy to see you in my inbox or notifs
I hope you're doing well đ„čđ Sending you all my love too mwah mwah
hello! we've never talked before but i just wanted to make sure i hope you're doing well! i first found your fics last year, and i binge read everything in a single night because the way you write makes it so easy to get pulled into a different world, i still reread your silver x reader every now and then because there's nothing funnier than exasperation ksjdhdh again i just hope you're doing better now, i'll send off here đ đ
Ohhhhh that's so sweet...! Thank you for your support đ
Is Silver your favorite or is it Sebek's exasperation that you find funny, lol. Anyway this might be good news to anyone who likes Silver, haha
These are probably my most recent drafts? The Silver one was in the works since the Sebek birthday fic but I kinda forgot what my planned plot for it was, so I'm still unsure on the plot, though it'll probably be quite light and hopefully funny, lol
For those who remember me and have been wondering how I've been...! This is Nathya, I'm alive!
I'm really sorry for disappearing without a word to you guys and especially my friends/mutuals, and the people who inquired about commissions. Things have been really tough and my life, although better now, was really rough for quite some time.
I've mentioned I think that I've been dealing with health issues, and it's been tough on me mentally, physically, and financially. Without disclosing details during my hiatus I've discovered that I had a disability, among other health issues related and unrelated, and it took me a lot of time coming to terms with it and learning how to deal with it. It's affected my life in ways that I was not prepared for, almost taking over it for quite some time. I think it just sucked the joy out of me, and even things like fandom activities couldn't help me.
I haven't had the time for myself, or even games or hobbies until this year. I've connected and reconnected with people and have had people encourage me to get back into games (Genshin specifically, I can't believe TWST is still region locked :/ I don't remember how to access my account). I've also found more things to be happy about, and even though my health still isn't at its best I am able to find life enjoyable, which is a huge step for me.
For writing related updates, I'll still have to think about it realistically, but I did recently open up my drafts again :)
After all this time I realized I still have a lot of love and passion for these characters, so I feel like I can't really stay away for too long, right?
That and I think that I've experienced more things in life, things that honestly inspire me to write again. But we'll see!
Feel free to reply or leave an ask if you have something to say or ask. For mutuals, I don't have access to my old discord anymore but feel free to DM I can relay if you wish!
That's all. I made this post impulsively before going to bed, it just felt like the time was right is all
đ Thank you for all the support. With love, Nathya (zgvlt)
72 notes for a post saying hi is funny lol, hope you're all doing well :> surprised it even appeared in anyone's dash
i'll try to catch up with the characterization developments first before i try writing for twst again âșïž i can't promise how soon it'll be tho đ them again i've never been a quick writer so that's normal lol
sorry guys and girlies and ghouls i got sick again some time after this đ 2024 was not it for me so no fandom or social media presence at all đ but i think im doing better đ
72 notes for a post saying hi is funny lol, hope you're all doing well :> surprised it even appeared in anyone's dash
i'll try to catch up with the characterization developments first before i try writing for twst again âșïž i can't promise how soon it'll be tho đ them again i've never been a quick writer so that's normal lol
HI! Would love some suggestions! What's your favorite romantic/pre-relationship dynamic for the following:
Trey Clover
Cater Diamond
Rook Hunt
Lilia Vanrouge
Or if specifying any dynamics is too difficult, then maybe a personality type you enjoy most with their characters. Feel free to send in asks or replies/rbs. Thanks in advance đœ
tags: gender neutral reader, sfw, fluff/romance, aged up characters (since they're all working), no magic AU, 12k+ words, not beta read
author's note (see end for more): (Belated) HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEBEK and (Belated) Happy Anniversary, TWST JP! Since my first fic was also on Sebek's birthday last year, Happy 1 year anniversary to my blog! Yippee!
you can also read this on AO3
âHello! Youâre here again.â Sebek looked up from the menu to stare at you, not unkindly but in a not exactly friendly way either. âDear regular. What will you be having tonight?â
âIâll have honey lemon tea,â he replied easily, heeding the recommendation his two bosses gave him. It would be good to keep his voice loud and healthy, they said, and who was he to not follow such a well-meaning, wise suggestion? âHot, please.â
âAlright,â you replied, scribbling something on your notepad quickly, âand for something to bite⊠The usual, sir?â
Sebek nodded, âWhatever went unsold, Iâll get it all.â
You smiled brightly. He remembered you used to be visibly shocked the first few times he dined in, even concerned for his wallet with how much he ordered. He had huffed at the time, proclaiming that he was very well compensated by his very well-off employers, and that there was no use in worrying about him or his appetite. Nowadays, though, with the growing popularity of your business, you seemed more concerned about whether you had enough to feed him with.
âItâs really nice that you eat well,â you said, âdoes it have something to do with your job? You know, like people who compete in bodybuilding have to eat a certain amount and eat certain things to develop their body a certain way when they work out.â
âYouâve never asked me about my profession before,â Sebek noted. Many people would have stopped at that and you did look like you were about to apologize for prying, but he was, honestly, extremely proud of his job, so he found himself talking about it anyway. âBut yes. Eating a certain amount is a part of my training regimen! How can I protect Sir Malleus properly if I canât utilize my body efficiently?â
You blinked. âIâm sorry, protect who?â
Sebekâs first instinct is to groan to himselfâthat was a slip of the tongue, he should have been more careful with his wordsâŠ! What if youâre some delusional fan whoâs going to pester him about Malleus Draconia?! What if youâre an anti whoâs going to try to use him to get close to the man and try to harm him?!
âMalleus⊠I feel like Iâve heard that name before. Is he a model or something?â
The second instinct he has is to immediately educate you, because unless youâre extremely good at pretendingâhe has to keep his guard up before he can clear that doubt about youâyou seem to not know who Malleus Draconia is, which is an act malum in se⊠A crime in and of itself.
âHow do you not know the greatest performer of the century? The Malleus Draconia!â Sebek exclaimed, shaking his head. Simultaneously, he brought out his walletâbut not to pay for his orders yet. Rather, snuck in a slot right in between his credit card and debit card, he pulled out a photo card, one of the man being brought up. âThis is Malleus Draconia. He was a talented stage actor in his childhood, then he became a soloist in his teenage years, before returning back to acting, this time in movies and series, in his adulthood. He also models, yes, in commercials and magazines, but it is not his main profession.Â
âSurely you must have seen him somewhere? Perhaps you simply did not know his name but your eyes have been graced with his performances!â
âUm, I hate to break it to you⊠I donât think I know any of his songs, or watched anything heâs in,â you admitted, though upon locking eyes with him for a few seconds you ended up adding, âIâm sure heâs very talented, though! I mean, he certainly looks the part of someone popular. Iâll, err, do my research once I get home? If I donât pass out in bed immediately,â
âThatâs WONDERFUL! Of course, if you are truly as new to him as you say you are, you will have much to catch up on,â Sebek sighed, as though pitying you slightly, âbut it will certainly be worth it. If youâre quick to invest enough, I wonât be surprised if you begin begging me for tickets to his concerts or fanmeets, or if you try to bribe me to get his signature. I wonât do it, mind you! So Iâm warning you now!â
It was a very genuine warning, but something about the look on your face perturbed him. Could it be that you had plans to do so?
âSo during these fanmeets and all these other events⊠Youâll be in attendance?â you asked, and Sebek scoffed at the question. Was it not obvious?
âIâm one of his bodyguards,â Sebek proclaimed with pride, âI am always in attendance, not only in the case of an emergency, but to support him as well!â
âI feel like youâre about to tell me something along the lines of âIf Malleus Draconia has 1 million fans, I am one of them. If he has 1,000, I am one of them. If he has one, that is me. If he has none, Iâve departed from this world,â or however the saying goes,â you laughed, and Sebek had almost begun an argument about how Malleus had more than one million fans, thank you very much! His MagiCam followers were only surpassed by the likes of Vil Schoenheit and Neige LeBlanche, who were active on social media, so it wasnât a fair comparison!Â
âI think itâs nice that a serious guy like you has this kind of passion, even if I wouldnât have been able to guess it,â you said, âeveryone must feel really reassured that they could rely on someone dedicated like you to protect such a high-profile celebrity.â
âHmph! Of course they are!â Sebek was practically preening at your compliments, readily accepting them. âItâs good that even you, who hardly knows anything about Malleus Draconia, can recognize that!â
âFeel free to tip me for that if you want,â you said, âthat was a joke by the way, I was being genuine.â
âI know it was a joke.â Sebek did not know, actually. He was fully prepared to tip you more than usual for engaging in this type of conversation with him. Somehow, he found himself more rejuvenated than usual, even though he had quite the tiring workday. Hopefully the tea would do the trick and, if not, he supposed some late night lifting back in his apartment would get him sleepy!
âAlright,â you smiled, as though you didnât believe him. âIâll go prepare your order, Sebek.â
âIâm surprised you remember my name,â he admitted, âyou always call me your regular or something else instead.â
âSebek, youâve spelled out your name for me so many times for your coffee,â you reminded him, âS-E-B-E-K. Iâm sure anyone would remember a name yelled out at five in the morning, practically every day.â
âRight,â Sebek turned away from you, flushing slightly in embarrassment. Of course that made sense. He was a frequent customer. If not you, then one of your employees would write his name down on a coffee cup. Sebek was not a particularly common name, too, so obviously you would recall.
âSince you know my name, though, I should know yours as well.â
You didnât answer him initially, focused on preparing his orders and, right after, charging his card for the bill. However, when he gets his receipt, he finds it jotted in pencil at the back, alongside your MagiCam handle and phone numberâfor emergencies it says, right beside an asterisk, or if he needed something delivered to his workplace.
Sebek doesnât do social media, nor is he particularly social anywhere, mostly using his phone for work, to keep up with anything to do with Malleus, or to catch up with his family, but he keeps the receipt tucked in his wallet instead of throwing it out immediately.Â
That was all there was to it so, despite the regulations he had, self-imposed or otherwise, he found himself not just saving your number, but replying back, warning you to not spread his contact details anywhere.
Aside from a promise to do so, you text him something youâve already told him a while ago:Â Good night!
Perhaps he should have reminded you to only text him for important matters, but maybe it was a good thing that he didnât.
He did not reply, but he made sure to greet you a good morning in person the next day.
Sebekâs eyes have constantly been flickering between Malleus Draconia and the crowd coming to see him this whole time, that being for about an hour now, and as much as he enjoys seeing people recognize the celebrityâs talents and efforts to the point that they would line up for hours to see him, the whole affair is, for once, relatively uneventful.Â
Heâs grateful, of course, that thereâs no one to have to restrain for once; even his boss seems genuinely relieved that the event thus far had been very peaceful, what with him flashing a rare grin (with teeth!) instead of his usual closed-lipped smirks and smiles.Â
What a blessed day to be a supporter of Malleus Draconia.Â
That was why, although he still tried to keep vigilant, he found himself relaxing slightly, just soaking up the good atmosphere.
Why didnât you tell him you were going to attend?! You never even showed any interest in attending when he told you there was going to be a fanmeet today!
Then, you placed a paper bag on top of the desk. The contents had to be food, Sebek was sure, because while you did your best to cover up where the food had come from by using something plain as opposed to branded packaging, there was no hiding the familiar smell of pastries within.
Really, it showed that you were awfully new to events like these. Though the rules differed from celebrity to celebrity, Malleus specifically was not allowed to accept foods that were not, at the very least, sealed and packaged. For safety reasons, unfortunately, but a measure that had to be done.
Still, because you, from what he knew of you, were a well-intentioned person, he didnât want to embarrass you in front of anyone. He was already making his way to grab the paper bag himself, as well as give you a reminder for the future, when you decide to tell Malleus something, muttering low enough so as to not be heard by anyone else.
âNice to meet you, Malleus,â you said, shaking the hand in front of you, âSorry if this is impolite, but could you give this to Sebek?â
Sebek nearly screamed. He really was about to, but he just about managed to hold back, merely jolting in place. His fellow guard slash his other bossâ assistant slash adoptive son, Silver, stared at him pointedly.Â
âYou know one of my bodyguards?â the black-haired man asked. While Sebek could not see his expression from his vantage point, he did sound intrigued by you. âAre you SebekâsâŠ?â
âOh I wouldnât worry about him. He had a hefty breakfast, I promise,â Malleus laughed, âthough Iâll make sure to give this to him anyway, since you worked so hard to bring it here.âÂ
âThank you, I really appreciate it. Sebek was right about you being nice. Iâll try to support you in the future,â you promised, âIâll be going now. I donât want to take away any more time than I have from your fans.â
âAlright, take care,â Malleus said, and Sebek watched you walk away with a smile, wondering to himself who exactly it was meant for considering the difference between who you were talking to versus who you were looking at.Â
Malleus spun around to hand the bag to him, eyes gleaming.Â
âWell, you might as well prepare yourself. Lilia is going to pester you about this later,â he laughed ominously, promptly turning back to the crowd to greet his next fan before Sebek could get a response out.
âYou must have lined up for about an hour just to get to the front,â Sebek said, confronting you as soon as he got back to his hotel room. Through the phone, he heard you let out a hum of agreement. Sebek sighed right after. âYou didnât have to do that.â
âI was expecting you! You said youâd be able to go get your morning coffee,â you retorted, âwell, âcoffeeâ, quote-unquote, itâs more like milk with a dash of coffee⊠But seriously, isnât it normal to get worried, especially because of the type of job you have?â
Sebek glanced at the mirror, the visual representation of his heated face reflected right back at him.Â
âSomething came up. We had to leave earlier than usual, so I couldnât stop by,â he explained apologetically⊠and blatantly ignoring the comment about his tastes in caffeine. âYou could have messaged me.â
âYou donât check your phone during work hours,â you reminded him, âunless itâs work related.â
âHow sure are you that I would not have checked?!â Sebek asked, rolling his eyes despite the fact that you would not be able to see it. âSeriouslyâŠ! I got a severe questioning from my boss because of you!â
âOops, sorry!â you apologized, not sounding all that sorry. âWhat did Malleus ask you? I canât imagine him as the type to grill you all that much.â
âNot much, thankfully, since, AHEM!â He cleared the non-existent phlegm in his throat, using that time to think of some other response other than the truth. âHe mostly did the listening, not the questioning. Our chairman did.â
He inevitably went with the truth.
âDamn⊠your chairman?â you laughed, though it seemed more sympathetic this time, âYou didnât get in trouble, did you? I know some people are particularly strict with, you know, how they operate during work hours, who they associate with, not allowing people in your personal life to interact with people in your profession, things like that.â
âNo! No, heâs terrifying sometimes, but heâs extremely compassionate too!â Sebek said, defending the man, âAlthough the questions⊠I would have preferred not to answer them at allâŠâ
The recollection of the earlier event, the awkwardness and embarrassment he felt as he was questioned about you of all people, everything about it made him groan in annoyance. It felt like no matter what he answered, he found himself digging into a deeper and deeper hole that he couldnât get away from.
âOkay, I wonât pry about the questions since you seem so pained by the memory,â you assured him, âeven if Iâm curious, so⊠Letâs talk about something else, then, if youâre not busy.â
Never mind that, at the time, he was there as a customer and right now, well, there was no real reason for him to speak to you without the proximity binding you two to converse.Â
âAre you sure? You sound a little tired.â
âMe? Tired? Do you still not know me well enough to be able to suggest such a thing? The events of today are not enough to make use of all of my strength, mind you!â he huffed, incredulous at the suggestion. âEven if I were to stay up for three consecutive nights, I would be able to do it!â
âWould not recommend that, even if itâs for work.â He imagined you shaking your head at him in some form of disapproval. âHow was the coffee, by the way? I hope it was still warm by the time it got into your hands.â
âIt was actually, yes.â His eyes darted onto the coffee table, the mint green tumbler sitting there, emptied and washed. âThe insulation was good and it kept the drink sufficiently warm. I must ask where you bought it! I should replace my current water bottle with something similar.â
âAhh⊠Just keep it, then,â you told him, hastily adding, âI havenât used it yet, by the way! So you donât have to worry about, like, my germs or something.â
âI canât possiblyâŠâ Sebek said, trailing off as he listened to your protests. âFine! Let me pay for it, then.â
âSebek, no.â He tried to imagine what type of expression you would have on your face by now as you tried to argue with him. There were some complaints and banter, yes, but insistence regarding something so simple was new in regards to you. âJust consider it as a thank you for being my regular.â
âAbsolutely not, then. Goods and services are meant to be paid for, and Iâve paid for them appropriately. Itâs not like youâre handing them out to me for free. If anything, shouldnât I pay you extra for doing a delivery run even when you did not have to go that far?â
For a moment you did not say anything, and Sebek thought he had finally won against you. Then, as though to let him know your silence was simply spent thinking of the perfect response, you replied,
âThen itâs a gift,â you told him, âbecause youâre my friend.â
âFRIEND?!â Sebek blurted out, before clearing his throat the second time that night. âAh! Well, yes, of COURSE. This is normal behavior for friends to exhibit, yes. The exchange of gifts. Tokens of friendship.â
âYeah? I mean, not everyone really needs to exchange. Sometimes, just receiving or just giving is enough,â you pointed out, âbut you know, it feels nice to let your friends know you appreciate them any way you can, and that youâre appreciated, too.â
âOf course,â Sebek nodded to himself. Payment wasnât what you wanted. What you needed in return was something⊠heartfelt and genuine. It was like one of his favorite Malleus Draconia movies, where he, to show his appreciation, gifted his dear ally something practical, something special, something he knew they would enjoy. It was such a good movie he had teared up, and what kind of fan would he be if he were not to heed the morals of the media he consumed? âIâll keep that in mind.â
âThatâs oddly intimidating, but alright,â you replied, yawning midway, âAlright, itâs getting late, and if not you, then I should go get some rest, so⊠See you tomorrow?â
âI wonât be there in the morning,â he let you know, âbut Iâll see you in the evening.â
It was thereafter he remembered that his room was right beside Malleusâ, who tended to stay up late with Lilia, who often had Silver by his side, and thusâŠ
Someone knocked on his door, a familiar beat of a song from his hometown. When he opened it up, he was only slightly surprised to be face to face with his fellow bodyguard, somehow awake at this hour.Â
âSebek, try to lower your volume next time,â the light-haired boy sighed, âfather told me to let you know he and Malleus could hear your loverâs quarrel from the next room.â
He felt the red seep back into his face, though he wondered if it had ever really left in the first place.
âIâll go over and apologize⊠even if itâs not a loverâs quarrel!â he boomed, before shutting the door behind him. Next to him, Silver shrugged.
âOkay, maybe we just misheard.â
âAnd misunderstood, too,â Sebek added. They walked a few steps in the hallway, walking away from room 1703 stopping right in front of 1704, Malleusâ room. Before Silver could use the keycard, Sebek halted the action. âWait. Answer me this before we enter.â
âSure?â Silver asked, confused by how sudden it was brought upon him. âIf I can, Iâll try.â
âSilver⊠What kind of gifts do friends usually give each other?â
âSIR! What are you doing here?!âÂ
At his exclamation, Malleus Draconia looked away from his conversation partner, you, to acknowledge his presence. Beside him, you smile and wave at him, as though beckoning him to come closer. He could not compel himself to do so, choosing to stand right next to the door.
âAm I not allowed to be here, Sebek?âÂ
He froze, panicked and unsure of how to respond. Who was he to dictate where the man was allowed to go, especially a place not just harmless, but a place he was fond and familiar with? If anything, his pre-existing preoccupation with the establishment should have assured him that nothing terrible would happen to his employer.
Beyond safety, the person who ran the business itself was one he approved of beyond measure, thusâŠÂ
âThereâs no reason you shouldnât be, sir!â he replied hastily, gaze avoidant of your own, focused on the tall man. âI was just shocked to see you here so late, and without Sir Lilia or Silver by your side!â
âEven before you and Silver were enlisted as my guards, Iâve been accustomed to taking walks at this hour. Youâre not the only creature of the night, after all.â Malleus moved to stand up from his chair, the seat he (and you) preferred to occupy during nights like these, walking towards him slowly. âSince I understand now why you frequent this place, I should take my leave.â
Sebek let out a sound of protest instinctively, ready to either drive or walk the man back to his home or whichever location he wanted to go to next, but Malleus waved him off.
âI donât need to monopolize any more of your time, especially since you just got here. I already have your company nearly everyday for multiple hours a day.â His gaze drifted back to you, looking unsure as to whether you should insist on having Sebek escort him or otherwise. âUnlike a certain someone. Iâll go hail a ride by myself.â
âDo⊠Do you have the app for that installed on your phone?â Sebek asked, admittedly doubtful at the actorâs ability to book one for himself. Not that he could dare say his concerns out loud.
âKids these days⊠Lilia taught me how to do it, remember?â he deadpanned, ânow leave me be and donât even think about being back at the hotel room until at least midnight.â
âDid you just get a reverse curfew?â you muttered in disbelief, attention all on him as Malleus took his leave.Â
âIâm⊠a little confused myself,â Sebek admitted, âbut Iâm sure someone as intelligent as Sir Malleus has his reasons for imposing a, as you said, reverse curfew. In fact, I can think of a few right now!â
You looked surprised, which was an offense (none taken, but an offense nonetheless) to him. Sure, he would not say he was one hundred percent sure, false advertising was a crime, but he was at least ninety percent sure, which was more than decent by his standards.
âOh? What do you think Malleus is trying to do?â
âItâs not that he doesnât have his own sense of agency, but I have my reasons to believe that the chairman influenced him to visit you during his free time,â Sebek sighed, growing more and more embarrassed as the list of reasons began writing themselves in his brain. Was he actually going to reveal all of it to you?!
Of course he was. He never quite got the ability to keep his mouth shut unless told or, well, with you sometimes.
âHim coming here was probably due to a few things. First, theyâre trying to teach me some kind of lesson. That isââ
âWait, lesson?â you laughed, finding his answer a little absurd, âDo you think seeing me is a punishment?â
âOF COURSE NOT!â he denied immediately, âTo imply as such is downright repugnant!â
âPfft, it was a joke!â
âI donât see how it could be humorous.â Sebek shook his head, wondering how you could afford to smile at his displeasure. What a terrible thing for someone to find your company even the least bit unpleasant; even more terrible, for someone to think he could dislike it, dislike you. âIn any case, what I meant by lesson is that they might want to remind me that, as a bodyguard, my protection should not be limited to my employers and family. Rather, it should extend to good people. Like you.â
âThatâs⊠Thatâs quite the sweet conclusion to arrive to, butâŠâ you trailed off for a moment, as though hesitating to continue. âSebek, do you really think thatâs the reason Malleus told you to stay?â
âIt would make sense, but there are other reasons, Iâm sure.â
âOkay, then tell me another, since Iâm not too convinced.â
âWell⊠It could be a reward,â Sebek said, âfor a job well done. Instead of having to continue working at this hour, which I would be happy to do, Iâm proud of what I can do as a bodyguard. Iâm sure some consideration is in play by allowing me to spend time with a friend instead.â
âAh, well, yes, but also no. Iâm not sure how you can get it, but also not? At the same time?â you laughed, awkward but not demeaning. It still perturbed him, though.
âOkay? Then explain your thought process, then,â Sebek huffed, slightly frustrated at what he was not getting, âYou seem to have talked a decent amount with my boss before I got here, somehow to the point that you can understand his way of thinking already.â
âI would, but he told me to keep it between us.â Before he could complain and demand to know anyway, you switched the subject very deliberately and, to your fortune, rather effectively. âSo you think getting to spend time with me is a reward?â
Sebekâs eyebrows furrowed, indignant at your choice of ignoring his inquiry and at himself for not catching his word choice. Reward, was that the word he used?
âHmph! Donât get too haughty about it now!â he insisted, a warning that you would likely not take to heart, âItâs less reward and more a rewarding feeling, like something nice to look forward to before I end my day.â
âI see.â Except youâre not looking at him again, despite there being no one else to look at. Sebek should be frustrated, as he tended to be when people did not pay attention to him when he addressed them, but thereâs something soft about your expression that has him okay with the slight impoliteness. He supposed even someone like him could fall victim to favoritism after all.
Thereâs another reason he could have told you that comes into mind, but he swallows it for now.
âIâll go get you something to eat,â you told him, suddenly standing up and leaving him alone at his usual table. Sebek realized that might have been the first time the both of you had simply talked without anything in front of the both of you, no barriers, no disruptions. It was like those signs that were hung up in establishments sometimes, telling people to talk or read a book instead of using their phones and asking for the internet password.
Sebek abided by those quite a lot, reading whatever book he could lay his hands on (or an electronic book if his bag was strapped for space), but he never could have imagined talking to someone about⊠topics that he had never discussed with anyone, for a lack of a better term.
âThereâs something Iâve been thinking about.â
âYes?â You looked up suddenly from the plate of pastries you had picked up for him, genuinely curious and perhaps even showing an anticipatory flash of excitement. âLay it on me.â
âOh? Interrogating me, are you?â you laughed, as though amused, though you looked away and had gone back to piling pastries, now on a second plate, so he could not see your expression. âDonât worry, I only said good things about you.â
Shame as it was, it was alright. Even without seeing your eyes, he knows you are not one to lie, especially with such a matter important to him.
On one hand, he likes (more than, even, perhaps adores) the idea that you talked about him, good things at that. Beyond that, the idea that you could compliment him to his superior, a person heâs heavily respected since childhood, pleased him heavily. With that saidâŠ
Itâs not jealousy or envy, per say. He knows what those taste likeâheâs been eating and swallowing them up for years, after allâwhich is how he knows what heâs feeling isnât anything associated with the sin. Rather, he supposes heâs⊠concerned. That talking to others about him would give you a certain impression of him, one thatâs not very capable after all, even though he goes on and on about how dedicated and passionate he is when it comes to his job.
Dedication is one thing. Ability is another.
The thing is, Sebekâs come to the realization that he wants, needs you to think of him as someone capable, though he canât be sure why the idea of you in particular showing disappointment in him scares him so much.
âDo you think Iâm lacking in any means?â Sebek breathed out the question without any context, and while you looked somewhat surprised at the question, you donât grill him for it either. Maybe you understood what he meantâyou had gotten good at that, he thought, understanding him in a way others failed to.
âI canât say for sure,â you replied honestly. You sit in front of him once more, placing two plates in front of him that would go unnoticed and untouched for a little while longer. âWhen it comes to work in particular. However⊠Most people arenât exactly built to be perfect in everything, so everyone is lacking in something.â
You could have stopped there. Itâs a model answer to a question he had sprung up on you for no real reason other than to see what you think or, maybe, to reassure himself over this and that.Â
You donât stop. Instead, you looked him in the eye and asked,
âDo you want me to tell you what I really think?â
âPlease,â Sebek said, desperate not just for praise, but for feedback. As long as it was an opinion you held of him, that you had an opinion on him that wasnât so⊠typical, he supposed.
âI think that when it comes to your character, I think youâre doing your best to become better and better each day. Whether this is the path you continue to take in the future or not, I think thereâs one thing you will never lackâitâs your dedication.â
Sebekâs beaming the rest of the night, even when itâs mostly silentâhim regaining his energy and calories, you asking him questions here and there about his day, him throwing them back at you. Itâs peaceful and heâs happy, heâs happy and itâs got nothing to do with Malleus or Lilia or winning in a friendly martial arts spar against Silver; itâs got nothing to do with his parents doting on him or his siblings making him his favorite food. Itâs got all to do with you and itâs just⊠terribly wonderful.Â
Itâs a minute after midnight when he stands by the entrance again, smile a little smaller, regretful to have to go, but teeth still blinding nonetheless. Heâs thinking if he should ask if he can help you clean up next time, or if he should offer to drive you homeâsome other excuse to stick around a little longer, all under the guise of his bossâ orders, when you interrupt his reverie.
âSebek, before you go, I need to ask you something.â You stood by the door. You donât invite him in nor do you step outside with him, but you keep the door open to be able to talk to him. âOr tell you something. Both.â
âWhat is it?â
âMalleus told me your awareness levels are⊠a work in progress, but do you really not understand his intentions? Or, one of them, at least,â you asked, âIâm sure he and Lilia and Silver are very nice people who genuinely want you to spend more time with me as a friend, and that theyâre curious about me as a person because Iâm your friend, but itâs a little clear to me that theyâre trying to see if they can get something else to happen by giving us more time alone, or purposefully seeking me out during a time you would usually come by.â
Sebek did not answer immediately, not because he did not understand where you were getting at, but because he had not wanted to acknowledge it. His awareness skills, he was told, were something he needed work with, but the base level was not zero.
After all, every mention of you brought upon implications upon implications. At that point, even he would get it. It was just that⊠it was embarrassing for you to realize it as well, so he tucked the reason he was very well-aware existed at the back of his mind.
Unfortunately, you already realized it, too.
With the silence that followed, you decided to continue.
âMalleus told me to keep this a secret, but it didnât feel right,â you admitted, somewhat cautiously, like the man would be able to hear you break a promise, âso Iâm telling you now. He was asking me what I thought about you, mostly, or what I felt. Anything to gauge if the two of us were actually in a relationship or if there was some way to set us up or get us together.
âItâs nice that he cares, but, you know, still a little shocking to have some world famous celebrity come up to you and ask you about your intentions with his bodyguard. Shouldnât it be the other way around?â
âI have to apologize,â Sebek said, unsure of who, if there was anyone, really, to blame for the situation. He knew you had started it by appearing in their sights during the fanmeet, but he was the one who brought you up, and⊠Sebek was loathe to so much as think it, but even his seniors played fault, too, no matter how well-meaning they were.
âIâm sorry for bringing you into this. Theyâre just⊠I donât mention anyone other than my family. Iâm not exactly the mostâŠâ His voice dropped to a whisper, as though unwilling to admit something. âWhat Iâm trying to say is that I hope youâre not off put by me all of a sudden because of this.â
âWhat? Of course not!â Without a second even passing you had countered the idea immediately, and in the evening, the sun had shone in his heart once more. âI was worried you would be put off by it! I mean, you never⊠I mean I like having you around, so it would kind of, really suck if you stopped because of, you know.â
You waved your hands around, unable to find the appropriate word. Sebek, articulate as he tried to be, understood the feeling this time around.
âNo, no! Itâs not a big deal to me! These kinds of things happen all the time in the entertainment industry, Iâve heard all the complaints first hand! If theyâre mentally strong enough to handle all those rumors about them, then something this small shouldnât bother me, nor should it you!â he proclaimed, and you nodded your head in agreement.Â
âThank the Sevens⊠I was seriously worried⊠Youâre too important to me.â
Sebek stiffened in place. For a moment, he thought he would burst into⊠something, maybe flames, maybe an explosion, just something crackling and sparking and sparkling. You looked like you had expected him to shout, too, but when his voice had left his throat it had cracked like he was going through puberty once more. Uncertain, unsure, unconfidentâwords that he believed had long left his vocabulary since.
âIâm important to you?â Sebek did not quite realize it then, but he asked not for a clarification but a repetition. He heard it right, but what he needed was to hear it again.
âYouâre important to me, Sebek.â
Sebekâs face was colored a bright redâhe can see it through the nearby windowâs reflection, hazy as it may be at this hour.Â
Itâs through that reflection, too, that he realized his hands had been shaking, torn between wanting to cover up his face and the smile growing back on it, to trying to hold onto⊠something, someone. He settled for curling one up in a fist, then clutching the lapels of his suit jacket the other.Â
âI SEE! I SUPPOSE IâŠâ He tried to respond with his usual bravado, but he could not compel himself to do it this time around. âAhem, IâŠâ
âHey, you donât have toââ
âNo, let me say it,â he interrupted quickly. Your consideration was always appreciated, but he wanted to make things fair, to make sure you understood. âTo you, I feel the same. You are⊠You are someone IâŠÂ
âYou are precious to me.â
âAh?â You let out a huff, some kind of sound of disbelief. He canât blame youâhe had meant to echo what you had told him for it would be the truth anyway, and yet a different statement had come out instead. âI thought you were going to say⊠SeriouslyâŠ!â
Then, you shut the door on him. Before Sebek can so much as worry if he had suddenly ruined everything, you go from leaning against the counterâthe transparency of the door had ruined your ability to hide yourself from himâto stomping right back up to the door, opening it wide.
âIâll see you tomorrow. Please stay safe on the way back,â you breathed out, somehow looking more frazzled within such a short time frame.
âOf course I will.â
âOkay. Good.â Then, you do something he had only seen people do in the movies, something he had thought would never happen in real life, much less to him.Â
You pulled him closer by his tie, almost as though you had wanted to drag him right back inside with you. Instead, though, you tug just strong enough to make him jolt forwards, letting him do the work of aligning himself to be right in front of you. With an anticipation he had never felt before, he abruptly shut his eyes, not knowing what else to do.Â
Unlike the movies, you donât leave a kiss on his lips. Because you are friends, and most friends donât just⊠do that, he thinks. However, the chaste peck you leave on his lips does not feel that friendly either.Â
Thereâs room for doubt, of course, because you are one of the only friends he even has, and the feelings he has with you have felt different than everyone else, but he just knows, for once not with his mind but with his heart, that he should not have felt that way receiving a kiss on the cheek from someone he saw asâŠÂ asâŠ
âGood night!â you shouted, emulating his usual volume, before running back inside, actually trying to hide yourself from him this time.
On the drive home he tries to simply move past everything, but the whole eventâthe whole night, reallyâjust keeps replaying in his head like a broken record. The stoplight is green and heâs thinking about how youâre such a wonderful friend and that you were exhibiting normal friend behavior. The stoplight is red and he has one hand off the steering wheel, too busy keeping it next to the cheek you had kissed.
Sebek tried to move on, really, but the thing isâ
Itâs almost one in the morning, so itâs a given that all the stores are closed. Some stores, however, keep the lights in their display windows open. He never would have noticed it before, but with Silverâs voice ringing in his head, it taunts him now.
âSebekâs not very good at moving past anything.
Sebek didnât believe in magic, he was a little too old for that, but that did not stop him from believing you might have cursed him somehow, maybe put some kind of magic in that tumbler you gave him, or the sweets he definitely did not enjoy that much and only ate for the dose of carbohydrates he needed.
It had to be some kind of curse, because why else was he actually heeding Silverâs adviceâSilver, of all people!âregarding what kind of gift you might enjoy. Why was he pulling up his maps application for a store he had never even known existed until he passed by it some nights ago while thinking about you! Isnât that crazy?!
âI can type it, you know,â you offered, comfortably strapped with a seatbelt at the back of his car. âNot that I know where weâre going in the first place, butâŠâ
âIâve got it,â he insisted, having already saved the address previously. âYouâll see. Itâs just ten minutes away from here.â
âShould I be nervous?â you asked with a short laugh, âI feel like I should be, especially since Iâm strapped so securely at the back of your car instead of, you know, the front next to you.â
âItâs what Iâm used to, so it was just my instincts telling me to make you sit there,â Sebek admitted, âyou can sit at the front if you want later.â
âNice! Still donât know where weâre heading, though. I donât recognize the store name you inputted.â
âI passed by it while driving home one time,â while I was freaking out thinking about you kissing me, except not really the type of kissing people expect when they hear the term kissing, except it felt like a real kiss to me anyway !
âI thought you might like some of the items they sold there.â
âAww! Since when were you such a sweetheart?â you cooed, and Sebek used the excuse of being too busy paying attention to the road to respond to what you said.Â
âIâm surprised youâre free today, though, since you donât seem like the type to skimp out on work. You give me the vibes of someone who would try to train somehow by going to the gym or something when you have a break.â
âThatâs true,â he replied, âthough Iâm not some kind of musclehead, if thatâs what youâre implying!â he said, âI also do other things, though, like dropping by bookstores in the area, or attending interesting lectures in my alma mater, orââ
âAccusing me of being disloyal? How insolent!â he huffed, âDid I waste my paid leave on you after all?â
Sebek was lucky he was the one behind the wheel, considering you looked just about ready to slam the horn of the car⊠or slam him against it, he canât be sure.
âWait, I thought you were free?!â
âI AM! Why do you think Iâm here? I took a leave, which means Iâm free for the rest of the day!â
âI thought it was just a day off or something! Like, Malleus told you you didnât have to accompany him anywhere or something!â
âI mean he did tell me that, or else I would be working.â He rolled his eyes, because was it not obvious that he would not just skip work if he felt that he was needed? He did not even think he would be ALLOWED to. âIâm healthy enough to never be ill so I donât use them up. If anything, they were very much alright with letting me take a leave once I told them my reasoning.â
âWell when you put it that way,â you laughed, âthey probably think youâre getting time off to take me out on a date or someâSEBEK EYES ON THE ROAD!â
âDonât spring up something like THAT on me all of a sudden!â His hand gripped the wheel tightly, chest heaving as he very nearly ran a red light. âNot that youâre wrong, but, you know!â
âI definitely wonât while weâre on the road,â you muttered, tearing your eyes away from him to look outside of the window, âbut, like⊠You know theyâre going to ask you about today later, right?â
âI have time to figure out how to word my report.â He cleared his throat, âOkay, wait, weâre here. You can step out and head in already, if you want. Parallel parking is⊠parallel parking.â
âNo, no, I want to see how long it takes you,â you snickered, âcome on, if you want to boast about being a terrific driver, this is essential to perfect.â
âHeh, you think youâre so cheeky and clever. This is why I shouldnât favor you over anyone elseâyouâre too keen on taking advantage of it!â Ignoring that he had essentially admitted that he did favor you, he shooed you out of his car. When it came to parking properly, he had to use all of his mirrors and⊠Honestly, he was a little terrified heâd damage someoneâs car because he miscalculated, distracted by your presence.
It takes him three minutes, which is way better than his latest record of four. He thinks it might be because he doesnât want to keep you waiting, knowing he wouldnât want to be kept waiting, too.
âSebek, look!â You tugged onto the sleeve of his sweater as soon as he entered the store, attempting to navigate him carefully through the aisles, shelves filled with fragile objects and breakables that neither of you wanted to pay for.
Taking him to a more secluded area, you pick up a mug to show him.
âDoesnât it look like you?â
âBecause itâs green?â he deadpanned.
âNo, no, look closely at the crocodile!â you argued. It was hard not to look closely since you were waving it right in front of his face. Other than the similarity in colors, heâs really not sure how itâs supposed to be him.
âI donât see what youâre talking about.â
âIâll make you see it then,â you proclaimed, âIâm getting it, then Iâll serve all your hot drinks with this mug so youâll be forced to stare right at it. Then, youâll realize Iâm right.â
âYouâre getting it because it looksâbecause you think it looks like me?! What kind of reason is that?â he coughed, pretending he did feel the least bit flustered by you. He took you here because he thought you might appreciate getting some nice mugs or plates or something for your cafe, and the first thing you pick out is something for him?! Isnât that just unfair?!
âOh, and Iâm getting this one as well!â His eyes follow your fingertips, seeing you point at a mug themed after a brown rodent. Given that the animal-themed mugs seemed to be in alphabetical order, then that one wasâŠ
âYou know capybaras are too big for crocodiles to swallow, right,â he explained, wondering if you were being purposeful in your selections thus far, âthatâs why they can swim in the same waters.â
âIn my heart of hearts that means they have a close relationship! Which means, Iâll be using that mug from now on, thank you very much,â you grinned at him, and all Sebek can do is take the two mugs from you, a lot more careful with his hold than he usually is. Heâs pretty sure thereâs only one left of the designs youâve picked out, so it would be troubling if anything had happened to them.
âI canât say I would have picked THESE out, but we went here for you, after all,â he began. He really did think there were designs more to his taste, like the squirrel themed one he saw by the display window, but he did not take his leave to go shopping for himself.
He was heeding Silverâs advice by getting you something practical you could use and, well, this was what he had thought of.
âSo if you like these, then weâll get them.â
âWait⊠Sebek, are you offering to pay? IâŠâ you trailed off, clearly remembering something. âNo way⊠Is this about the tokens of friendship? You never forgot about that?â
âI use the tumbler you give me all the time. Itâs pretty good for when I need something to drink during workouts, or keeping my drinks warm,â Sebek explained, âI wanted to get you something you could use all the time, too, so if youâll let me pay, Iâd be more than happy to!â
âIâll think about it⊠Iâm definitely not letting you pay for anything else I pick up, but if itâs those twoâŠâ you hummed, not giving an answer right away.Â
That was fine by Sebek, who had made a numbered list in his head of things he could do for you as some sort of⊠he didnât know how to describe it. Something to prove himself to you, he supposed. Impress you, maybe, or simply make you happy with him. Happy in general.
âYou know, Iâve heard people talk about whether people should split the bill on a date or not, but I never really hear discussions about whether people should give gifts or not,â you laughed, ânot that this is a date, but the same principle applies.â
Youâre walking away from him, perusing the rest of the ceramics and metals, and itâs then the impulsiveness wins in him.
âI MEAN, ITâS NOT LIKEââ He forgets himself and where he is, but youâre walking right back up to him, so he supposes his volume was alright in the moment. When youâre close enough, though, his voice drops to just above a whisper. âItâs not like it canât be a date. You donât have to insist that it isnât.â
âWell you didnât call it one when you popped the question all of a sudden at five in the morning!â you argued, âWait, youâre not saying date as in platonic date, right? I have nothing against it, but I donât want to misunderstandââ
âI meant it in a⊠in a⊠You know! The not-just-platonic way!â
âRomantic?â you supplied helpfully⊠or maybe unhelpfully. He knew the word! Saying it out loud, in public, was just embarrassing for him! Not embarrassed of you or his feelings or anything, just embarrassing in general. He wondered how the leads in those dramas and movies and books made it look so easy when it was the most nerve wracking thing heâs done since his job application!
âYes, romantic!â he exclaimed, suddenly grateful that there were no other customers besides them, and suddenly uncaring that the only other personâthe cashierâcould hear him. âIf you want!â
âWell, should I go ahead and tell you now? Sebek Zigvolt, terribly intelligent, incredibly cute, and occasionally dense, Iââ
âWait no!â He notices his grip tighten on the mugs, and he softens it just in time before any chips or cracks could appear on either one. âNot that, you know, I donât⊠We shouldnât say that here.â
âWhy not?â you asked, not offended but certainly curious.Â
âI want it to be more⊠special?â he cleared his throat, âNot that it canât be, since youâre here, but I want to be more prepared when I say it, or when I hear it. Whichever comes first.â
âOkay,â you responded, nodding in understanding, âyeah, maybe this was a little out of nowhere. We donât want to have regrets or anything.â
âNo, we donât,â he agreed. As much as he thought he would not regret any of his feelings for you, he did not want you to look back at this day and wish he had admitted his feelings for you some other way. He needed it to be perfect. âIâm glad weâre on the same page. About this and about, ah, our feelings⊠Right?â
âRight!â You left little room for doubt with your answer. You never seemed to when it came to Sebek. While he had absolutely no plans to admit it to your face anytime soon, he appreciated the lengths you went to make sure he would never misunderstand you or your intentions. Just as he was a man devout to chosen people, he was a man prone to doubt.
âThat said⊠Is your offer to count this as a date still up for grabs?â
Sebek Zigvolt was well into his twenties, so the idea that he was back to talking to an inanimate objectâa mug of all thingsâwas bizarre to him. Downright embarrassing, actually. Sometimes he found himself regretting buying that squirrel-shaped mug, but you were just way too convincing and now he uses it to store his toothbrushes. Wonderful.
âShould I do it today?â he asked. It had no mouth so it could not speak, but the painted-on eyes staring back at him held a resounding no.Â
âYouâre right. Domesticity is one thing, but is it not too casual to confess in my apartment of all placesâŠ?â he murmured.
He checked his teeth for any food or stains one last timeâold habits die hard when your parents are dentistsâbefore leaving the bathroom.
âAnd that would be no good! One must always rest without the distraction of work in the midst!â Sebek declared, walking over to the dining table, finding that you had already washed the dishes without him. You even remembered where he hid the towelsâit took you longer to find them last time.
âExactly, so I hope you donât mind me coming here again. Though, if youâre free, I also know a goodââ
A knock on the door interrupted the both of you. Sebek frowned, immediately reaching for something he could use to whack someone with in case of an emergency. Meanwhile, you walked over there without any hesitation.
âIâm already heading out anyway, so I might as well,â you explained, partially unlocking the door to get a peep of who was outside. âOh. Silver, right?â
SILVER?! What was that man doing outside of his apartment? Not that heâd never been, but still! Couldnât he have at least sent a text or call warning him? How rude, especially since he had a guest over, andâŠ!
Oh Sevens, he had you over, and Silver saw.Â
âThat would be me,â the man replied, face less stiff than usual. His expression is somewhere in between actually smiling and trying to de-widen his eyes. âYouâre SebekâsâŠâ
âYeah, letâs leave it at that,â you laughed sheepishly, âI assumed you would be Silver because of the hair. You probably get that a lot. Anyway, SEBEK! YOUR FRIEND IS HERE!â
âWHY ARE YOU SHOUTING,â he shouted, âI CAN SEE HIM.â
âTHEN IâLL LEAVE YOU TO IT,â you shouted back, âIâLL GO BACK TO WORK NOW.â
You unlocked the door fully now, allowing Silver to enter, you to exit, and Sebek⊠to also exit right after you. He knew it was not very hospitable of him to leave Silver to tend to his apartment, but it would only be for a minute anyway! The INTRUDER could handle himself for that long!
âHold on,â Sebek called out to you, grabbing hold of your hand. âI should give you a proper farewell. Itâs good manners.â
âYouâll see me again later anyway,â you laughed, âokay, come closer.â
Sebekâs gotten himself into a certain routine, he would put it, one that he loathed to break. Routine was routine for a reason, and there was no reason for him to not abide by it. What must be done shall be done.
You pressed your lips just next to his, narrowly avoiding them in favor of the corners where his smile lines were. Sebek suddenly wanted to go on a run so he could blame the sudden spike of his heart rate on the physical activity.
âIâll see you later,â you said as you pulled awayâfrom his face, from his hand, from him. This would have been the part where he would have offered to either drive or walk you back, butâŠ
He sighed as he went back into his apartment. He wanted to muster up a frown for Silver, but he was still too giddy to stop himself from smiling in time.Â
âWho said you could make yourself home in my place?â Silver, seated on his sofa and idly watching the news on his television, looked back up at him with a cup of coffee in his hand. Thankfully not one of the few cups youâve brought and left in his apartment, but still. âAnd why are you here anyway?â
âI was nearby, so I thought it would be more efficient to ride together. Save gas, itâs better for the environment.â The man took a sip of his coffee (without sugar or cream or milk! Just how did he manage?), humming appreciatively. âHuh. Your partnerâs pretty good at this.â
âThatâs true,â Sebek replied, and then realized his mistake. âBut, like I said, the two of us are NOT in a relationship.â
âThereâs no point in lying, if youâre worried about being professional, since we donât have a no-dating policy to abide by, unlike some talents out there,â Silver countered. That was NOT the issue though, unbeknownst to the man.
âI would NOT lie about this to you, and even more so to Sir Malleus and Sir Lilia!â he insisted. âWeâre currently dating!â
âIâm sorry?âÂ
âDating. No label yet. Like courting. There is a difference!â He said it like it was incredibly obvious, even though he had not realized there was a difference between going on dates and being in an official relationship before you had told him about it.
âAh, well⊠As long as youâre happy.â Sebek wasnât sure if Silver actually understood correctly, but he nodded his head anyway.
âExactly. I feel happy, so you donât have to pry.â
That was what Sebek told him, but, if heâs being honest⊠He really does want to confess soon. Itâs why after a moment of silence, he cavesâ
âBUT⊠You know, if you have any advice, I would listen attentively. Even if itâs subpar. Your previous advice regarding the gifts were decent, so I would not be against hearing what you would have to say.â
Actually the advice was more than decent, considering it somehow led him to being one step closer to being with you romantically, which was more than he ever could have hoped. However, he did not want to give Silver the satisfaction and credit, so he would not say as much.
âYou could have just said thank youâŠâ Silver deadpanned, shaking his head.
Sebek should have realized that the perfect place, the perfect time, would be that which was both special and familiar to the both of you.
Heâs reading through a small binder of papers his boss had given him. Heâs red-faced, slightly frustrated, but extremely focused at each and every word and line and note written in the margins, eyes intense like the words were his prey, his meal, like consuming the words would mean he would embody them.
You clearly notice how his attentionâs been completely captured by the papers in his hand considering you call him out for it. You never used to ask considering he sometimes held confidential documents, things even he canât tell you, but you canât seem to hold your curiosity this time around.
âMy boss gave me his scripts,â he replied, âto clarify, he selected a few scenes from some of the movies and dramas heâs acted in.â
âYou donât seem as excited as I thought you would be.â
âItâs not that Iâm not grateful!!! Being able to have papers from the original copy is wonderful! Iâm sure these count as prized possessions!â he exclaimed.
âBut?â
But the reason his boss gave them to him was embarrassing! His employer is terribly generous and kind, as expected, and maybe a little later heâll be elated about being gifted them, but the fact that Malleus gave them to him so he could get an idea of how to confess to you simply made him want to shrivel up and wither.
A part of him didnât want to explain it to you at all, perhaps think up some excuse on the spot, but he knew that honesty was important in all relationships, so he shouldnât hide it from you.Â
Thereâs also the fact that heâs not the best liar, but thatâs entirely irrelevant.
âI told you that I wanted to wait for the perfect time to confess, so I would have the right words to explain my feelings for you this time around⊠But Iâve been having difficulty formulating the perfect order of words, order of sentences.â Sebek was bashful at the admission. Even though he knew it not to be true, he sometimes felt that you were better at conveying your feelings for him than he for you. He felt repressed by comparison, even though he did his best to showcase his affections whatever way he could.
In him was the desperate need to not just make you feel how you made him feel, but to make sure you understood just how you have charmed him; that, at times, his heart was more yours than his.
âWith that, Sir Malleus, or perhaps Silver or Sir Liliaâwhoâs to say who made the suggestionâgave me a few scenes to read so I could be inspired to finally confess my feelings to you.â
âOh!â you looked somewhat pleased by his response, Sebek thought with relief. At least youâre not upset that, after all this time, heâs still having trouble to the point that heâs trying his luck with external sources. âWell, do you think itâs effective?â
âI canât say for sure,â he replied, âthe lines are well written themselves! Itâs just⊠Imagining myself saying them feels off, to say the least.â
âWell, you donât have to restrict yourself to imagining,â you told him, âyou can actually say them out loud.â
âIn front of you?!â He would have done a spit take had he been drinking a beverage, which would have humiliated him and ruined his chances of ever confessing to you, he dramatized in his head.Â
âIt wonât count as your confession. Just think of it like a read through! Hasnât Malleus ever made you do that while practicing his lines?â
âHe has⊠So I suppose I do have some experience in this matter, even if itâs nothing professional,â he nodded to himself, arriving at a decision. âYes. Alright. Well, have at thisâI come here with no expectations, only to profess, now that I am at liberty to do so, that my heart is and always will beâŠyoursâŠâ
âWell, the line itself was rather captivating, and I liked the way you said it, althoughâŠâ you stifled a laugh, âYou looked so serious reading the script that I can hardly call it heartfelt.â
âThat line wasnât in the book the movie was an adaptation of,â he pointed out, a factoid he just happened to know. âI was just reminded of it while reading the script⊠I wonder if the line is too direct? What aboutâŠÂ Anyone who has seen your smile has known perfection. You instill grace in every common thing and divinity in every careless gesture.â
âVery poetic,â you nodded, then joked, âif you ever consider switching careers, Iâll be your most toxic and supportive fan. Iâll go carry around your polaroid by daylight, then fight your antis by midnight.â
âHow silly,â he shook his head, pretending he wasnât a little flattered, even if it was a mere joke. âYou already have a polaroid at the back of your phone case, remember?â
âCorrection! Of us, not of you! Which, putting it that way, might be even better!â you laughed, âThough no point of using that against me when you have your copy tucked nicely in your wallet.â
âIâve been meaning to take it out.â
âSebek, you decorated it. With stickers your parents gave you when you had your last check up.â
âI TOLD them I was too old for stickers, but they insisted on giving me a sheet anyway!â he said, a well-prepared excuse in case you asked, âIt would have gone to waste!â
âOf course,â you chuckled, âremind me to ask for a sticker sheet the next time I go to the dentist. Maybe Iâll even go out of my way to go to your parentsâ clinic so we could match.â
âYouâre ridiculous,â and terribly, terribly sweet and lovely, but ridiculous nonetheless.
âYou love me anyway!â
âIâm not sure why I do.â
âJust like that!â Sebek doesnât get what youâre on about, and he doesnât for a while, even as youâre grinning at him, cheerful, beautiful. Honestly, he wishes he knew so he could do or say it again.Â
âJust like what?â
âSebek, you just told me you loved me.â
He froze.
âHad I?â he asked, voice a little shaky. Had he truly? If that was really the case, what an uneventful confession! How regretful and simple and incredibly plain, andâ
âIâm not sure if youâve ever considered this, but I donât really need anything grand or incredibly put together.â
You take the papers from his hands, gently putting them to the side so his hands could hold yours instead. Sebek adjusts his grip; holds them more delicatelyâjust tight enough a grip to feel that itâs truly you heâs holding, but loose enough to keep you comfortable. Your hands are precious; as is all of you. Not a prized possession for you cannot be possessed, but something to be treasured regardless.
âI feel that you deserve it, though,â he argues, a little forlorn, âI would speak my thoughts if I could. My mouth does not have the eloquence my brain has, I think.â
âYou can try regardless,â you say, âitâs something I love about you. That in spite of failure, you will try and try.â
You, endeared to him beyond the limit he thought possible, had little trouble in convincing him. How could he, eager to impress you and eager to prove himself to you, refuse such a request? How could he when you tell him there is something about him you love, to state that there is love in your heart for him? How could he not attempt to say the same?
If it is for you, then he will swallow down his pride and try.
âIn the past, I had wondered if the feelings I felt for you were that of romance or if I had been influenced by the opinions of others, if I even understood what romance was. Everybody knows that not all movies and books are true to life, and I was afraid I had misconstrued my feelings of friendshipâfor friends, to me, were few and far betweenâwith attraction, if attraction was misconstrued with love.Â
âBut it had dawned on me, what I had felt for you, that night you had first kissed me.â He peels his eyes away from your own momentarily, pained an action as it is, glancing at the entrance. âThe first night, I excused my constant thinking about it, about you, to the new feeling I had never experienced before. The second night, I was still thinking of you, and I excused it as simply wanting to sort out my thoughts as to what that action meant for you, all your intents and purposes.â
âAnd now?â His eyes returned to you, idly watching your lips move as you spoke. âWhat realization had you come to?â
âEven now, after several phases of the moon have come to pass, I still think of youânight and day, morning and evening. Nothing has left, for the only change would be the growth of my feelings.â
âI am sure more than ever, for how long I have tried to dispute or explain away my feelings, the tests I have done to make sure I could only be genuine with you⊠Tried and tested, tried and true, my heart and my soul is truly yours.â
âSebekâŠâ
You pull your hands away. The loss is mourned.
He thinks youâre saying something. He thinks and not knows because his ears stop working, just for a moment; among the vessels of his senses, only his eyes remain attuned, fixated on the way you stood from your seat, ridding yourself of the distance the coffee table forced between the two of you. It is only when you press your forehead against his that he feels everything again.
âHave I conveyed it to you?â he breathes out, pleading, âDo you understand me?â
âYou never should have doubted yourself. I understand you perfectly,â you reply, smiling softly. âSo let me make myself understood by you, too.â
end notes | masterlist of all my works |
other sebek fics
-> (the stories told, the charm you hold)
-> (capture my heart, my voice into art)
-> (stick to the script)
[ 1 ] Title comes from the phrases "tried and tested" and "tried and true", which I just combined with the sign off "yours truly".
[ 2 ] The AU idea came to me when I saw people make fancams of the bodyguards and back-up dancers of idols. It was kinda cute. I think they really deserve a lot of appreciation. Then the idea grew from there!
[ 3 ] For everyoneâs ages, I sort of imagined Sebek and Silver to be in their 20s, basically typical post-college age. Malleus Iâm not sure, letâs say 30s, and Lilia will be ??? (no one knows his age he has hid the documents). Basically theyâre all working adults.
[ 4 ] Malum in se: wrong or evil in itself; sinful and wrong by nature (as opposed to malum prohibitum, which means something is wrong due to law dictating it).
[ 5 ] The first quote Sebek says is ripped from the Sense and Sensibility adaptation. Spoilers! Many think that the famous confession line, âI come here with no expectations, only to profess, now that I am at liberty to do so, that my heart is and always will be...yours," is also in Jane Austen's book, but it's actually just in the movie! I actually like the adaptation and the line, by the way! Just a fun fact!
[ 6 ] The second quote is altered to be gender neutral. It's from Edmond Rostand's Cyrano de Bergerac. The original is, "Anyone who has seen her smile has known perfection. She instills grace in every common thing and divinity in every careless gesture.'
[ 7 ] Fun fact! Malleus purposefully chose scenes from book adaptations since he knows Sebek is a reader, so he would appreciate it more.
[ 8 ] I actually had a lot of ideas for this fic and universe in general that I just can't fit in so maybe I'll revisit it some other time with one of the other Diasomnia boys.