All Levi wanted is to feel his mother's warmth again. Kuchel choose to keep him despite of Kenny's protest, and she loved her only son unconditionally. You could almost touch what Levi felt when the tea cup shattered. He loved his mom so much that his childhood died with her. My guy deserve the biggest and warmest hug ever :(
so, @dont-f-with-moogles challenged me as such on this post and this is what i came up with:
as for the choice between those two front row cats, you might have thought Hange would be the red, aggressively affectionate one. but you'd be dead wrong.
because listen, this happens on the second Christmas day Levi spends above ground, and the first one after Hange unfortunately found out it's also his birth date (they confessed earlier today that Nanaba helped them break into Shadis' office to find Levi's record, and that is all they could dig up about him) and made, as he was afraid they would, a huge deal of it.
except he's starting to regret (yes, Levi is starting to regret something. no, he doesn't understand how it's happening either) thinking that was such a bad thing, because Hange has now spent the entire day with him (as in, took an actual break from their research and experiments), walked into town with him and took him to a tea shop that wasn't as fancy as he always feared those places would be (which probably has to do with how warmly the old lady behind the counter greeted Hange when they got in, but he's not going to pry about that.. yet) and discreetly bought and offered him the kind he liked best when they left.
and yeah, Levi's probably going to lose it when he realizes it was Hange's mission to lure him away from HQ today just so everyone could put together a surprise birthday party for him (and watch his reaction from afar instead of standing in a dark room and yelling out "SURPRISE" as Humanity's Strongest enters because, contrary to civilian belief, they are not a bunch of suicidal fools), and it will no doubt create yet another frustrating misunderstanding between them when he thinks that's all there was to Hange's behavior, but right now he doesn't know that...
no. right now, Levi's too drunk on the aftertaste of delicious tea, on confusingly comforting feelings about this day he hadn't associated with anything joyful since his mother died, and on Hange's insufferably irresistible kindness, to have noticed everyone lurking behind them
and right now, he's holding onto Hange's elbow to stop them from falling (because of course they had to walk backwards down those stairs so they could stare back at him as they excitedly ranted about who knows what and couldn't watch where they were going instead) and they're laughing off their own clumsiness and playfully mocking him like "hey, look at you on your higher step there, standing taller than me! this is so weird, i've never seen you that way before!"
and they keep yapping away, but his mind is stuck on that phrasing, and Levi gets so fucking... annoyed. annoyed at their teasing yet beautiful grin, at the deep brown of their scarf that so poorly compares to that of their eyes, at everything they've come to mean to him in the amount of time he's gotten to know them
and so, in a fit of insanity he'll blame on the magnetic pull they have on him even right now with their fogged-up askew glasses, he takes a deep breath, thinks what the hell
and goes with "well, here's another new way to look at me, shitty glasses"
Levi's Gaze Towards Hange Over Their Years Together
Gazing into Hange's eyes to stop her from being overly excited about going out the walls as a measure to keep her from doing something drastic because of her love for Titans.
Levi's gaze after silently watching and patiently waiting to pick up Hange after her research on the new Titan crystal.
Levi not being able to hold Hange's soft and understanding gaze after asking for forgiveness for losing her squad members.
Levi's gaze as he watched Hange leave the barracks with Connie, making sure they left alright. Not taking his eyes away until they were out of view.
Finding out Hange is alive after the explosion that took out Shinganshina and most of their comrades. The shock of seeing her alive and not being left alone.
Silently watching Hange as she read through Grisha's notes after the battle of Shinganshina. Watching from her blind spot so that he doesn't get caught and can observe longer without getting caught. Still taking in that Hange really is there and alive.
Protectively looking over Hange as she ventures into the unknown waters. Instead of looking over Eren and the other kids, or even watching the vast ocean of water in front of him, making sure Hange is alright and doesn't get hurt.
When they're at their most vulnerable and finally letting their deepest wishes of living together through the war, and hinting at the deeper feelings they hold for each other get voiced out as a possibility.
Realizing this is the last time he gets to see and be next to Hange. The last gaze and last time he willingly looks at her before her sacrifice. Keeping in memory her being alive instead of watching her death so she could live on in his heart and mind forever
There's so many more I wanted to add but I'm restricted to 10 GIFs per post. But this is enough to show how much Levi cared for Hange.
Am I in pain? Absolutely. This pairing is both the most beautiful and most devastating. The true definition of understanding and unconditional love. I hope they do have a happy life together in the afterlife.
this is the reason why Levi's character arc will always be one my favorite. He is helping to save the world even after witnessing all its darkest sides (underground, inside the walls, and even outside). He saw how humanity became selfish, sad, and cruel. But he still believed that humanity is worth fighting for. The world that was never kind to him ever since. The world who took away all his love ones–is the same world that he is trying to save 'til the end. What a man.
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