aeni

temporary escapism from a world of tragedy

[feelingsoftheday]

why does wanting to be loved sometimes feel so embarrassingly pathetic?

[autistobrat]

this too shall pass but the fuck was that for

[disc90s]

til my self sabotage do us apart

[0ymx]

i’m not even sad in a loud way anymore.

it’s just this quiet kind of tired that sits there and doesn’t leave.

i wake up, do the things i’m supposed to do, eat, talk, reply, smile when i need to and it all just feels like i’m going through something already finished

like the ending is already written and i’m just… filling in time

because what’s the point really…if everything eventually ends anyway? if people leave, if things fade, if even the good parts don’t stay.

i try to look for something. anything. to make it feel worth it but some days it’s like there’s nothing. i actually want at the end of all this.

no big dream, no clear reason, just… continuing.

and that’s the part that feels the hardest.

sometimes i don’t want anything dramatic, i don’t want to break down or disappear in a painful way.

i just.. wish i could quietly stop existing for a bit, like melting into a cloud somewhere where nothing is expected of me.

no thinking, no explaining, no trying to be okay.

just soft, just still, just at peace..

because i’m so tired of carrying, even when nothing looks heavy. it still feels like it is.

and i don’t know. maybe i’d come back. maybe i wouldn’t.

but for once, i just want to rest without feeling like i have to wake up again.

[sasak-i]

[bleedingflowers]

[thenevernovel]

I wonder if there's something wrong with the way I give love. If it's too bright or too warm and people mistake it for a different kind of sun.

| excerpt from a novel I will never write

[0ymx]

[whistle-whisper]

[0ymx]

it’s only been hours since you left,

yet it feels like the world has fallen quiet.

but i know your soul has found its light

free from pain, resting gently among the stars.

heaven gained a kind heart today,

and i’ll carry your love with me always. 🤍

[0ymx]

you gave without asking,

loved without end.

your strength became our shelter,

your heart, our friend.

though your chair is empty,

your warmth still stays

in the quiet mornings,

and our endless yesterdays.

❤️

[0ymx]

ive cupped the river in trembling hands,

thinking if i held it still enough,

it would stop its rush,

stay clear, stay kind.

but water keeps its promise to move

carving paths i cannot follow,

slipping through every reason

i whisper into its current.

ive learned the cruel mercy of time

how it heals, but not always to wholeness;

how it takes, and still leaves enough

for us to keep trying.

and so i stand at the edge,

hands open now,

knowing some tides are meant

to be watched, not won.

[pin-yao]

[0ymx]

if they asked who id run to, id only point at the night sky

for sometimes the stars feel closer than anyone on earth

[fuwanek0]

Housekibako ni Ai wo Tsumeyou, ch. 1

[0ymx]

[0ymx]