Who is the prettiest of them all?
Thigh gaps, big booty, good eyebrows, small waist, nice tits, big lips, good make-up, Kylie Jenner.
These features are part of what adds up to the social media’s perspective of being attractive; sexy. Although girls can look at the perspective of ‘being attractive’ differently, there are two most common ways:
· It causes depression, anxiety and can lead to mental issues and self-harm
· It motivates girls to be ‘healthier’, work out to get that body.
Girls at the age of 12 (or possibly even much younger) shouldn’t be worrying about how wide their thigh gaps are. Girls at the age of 13 shouldn’t be worrying about how big their tits are. Girls at the age of 14 shouldn’t be worrying about how good their make-up looks. Girls at the age of 15 shouldn’t be worrying about how big their asses look on instagram nor should Girls at the age of 16 be worrying about how good their eyebrows look.
In fact no girl or woman at whatever age should worry about how they look.
I, myself experienced this. At the age of 14, I wanted to be skinnier, I wanted to have a thigh gap, abs and a smaller waist. I didn’t eat breakfast and lunch, and all I did was work out a lot, to get that body I wanted. I wanted to look good and feel good, and I thought if I had a thigh gap like those girls on my computer screen, I would look as good as them. I lost the weight I wanted. And I thought I felt good. At the age of 15, started to pluck my eyebrows and do them the way some girls had it, because it looked good on them. I wanted to see that maybe it looked good on me. It came to a point where I plucked so much I literally almost had no eyebrows. During that time, I did countless of squats to get that ass I wanted, I would go through 200 a day and I did that for two months until I gave up. At the age of 16, I gained back the weight I lost, due to the exams (due to stress I ate so much) and there was a short phase shortly after my exams have finished where I became depressed about my weight and the way I looked. I always compared myself to others, I thought I was never pretty enough or good looking enough. I thought I wasn’t slim enough. I started skipping breakfast and lunch, and during the wait for dinner all I’d have was water. In all honesty, it was only last week when I started eating breakfast and lunch again.
But what I realised is that, I was so focused with looking good, looking attractive that I forgot how to appreciate myself, my health and my body. Instead of eating, I smoked my hunger away. Forcing to make myself believe that cigarettes made me full and the rumble coming from my stomach is just my stomach complaining that I smoke too much. I tried to push the hunger away from me. I lied to myself. I told myself that it was little sacrifices to make myself better. But in reality it was actions that could cause serious health issues.
But what you guys need to realise, regardless of your gender / sexuality / race, is that we are all different, we all have different body types, we don’t look the same and that’s okay. That’s why we shouldn’t base our looks on a few features, so what if we don’t have a small waist, big butt and big tits? You are so much more than a few compliments and comments on instagram telling you that you are beautiful.
We all have ‘flaws’, even the people you look up to, the people you find flawless probably have as much ‘flaws’ as you think you do. But the difference is those people you look up to have appreciated the fact that they have ‘flaws’ and have learnt to love themselves despite it. Take your ‘flaws’ as a positive thing, instead of taking it negatively. You need to realise that beauty isn’t just based on your outer appearance. And you need to realise that how pretty you look isn’t just based on other people’s opinions of you. You need to realise that people will always talk, bad or good they will always have something to say, and it comes down to you on how you take that in. You need to realise that your opinion on yourself, your appreciation and how you love yourself is what matters the most. Literally, fuck what these people say about how women and men should look, because you are what you are and you need to love yourself.
Because how the hell can you love someone else when you can’t even love yourself? How can someone love you when you can’t love yourself?
Self-appreciation can be considered as a hard thing, and I know that. I still have insecurities that I’m trying to appreciate. But it takes time, patience and positivity. Block yourself from negative comments, stop thinking negatively. Instead of worrying about your insecurities start appreciating the things you like/love about yourself. Once you start only thinking about the good things, the considered bad things become positive too. This doesn’t take one day; this has to be a daily thing. Start appreciating yourself more rather than ignoring that you are beautiful.
And if you wake up being like ‘Fucking hell I am fucking buff’, stay like that. So what if people call you over confident. It’s a way to appreciate what you’re worth. You don’t need to wait for someone to call you beautiful to know that you are beautiful. Other people’s comments to you should only take a small piece of what you are. In fact it shouldn’t even take up anything of what you are because as I’ve probably said countless of times, you are what you think you are.
The way you present yourself to people is how they’re going to take in that you are. So if you feel that you aren’t good enough, people are going to take that and victimise you. That’s going to hurt you even more.
Don’t base your beauty on what the media claims as appealing.
Love yourself because you are worth so fucking much more than big lips, fat ass, small waists and good eyebrows.
Loving yourself is what makes you beautiful because you know what you’re worth without worrying what others think and that’s fucking sexy.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not bashing those who have those traits. You are as beautiful as everyone else, its just harder for those who think they don’t have it, to appreciate themselves because the media isn’t considering them beautiful.
Away with the negative and in with the positive and its one step closer to loving yourself.
