19%

Constantly in low power mode

[casual-caroline]

me running after my pets to see what’s in their mouths

[19-percent]

Tubbs the cat has Big Dick Energy

[thein-crowd]

Wonder Woman 2017

[slimetony]

Engineers have developed a machine powerful enough to milk god

[regularlesbian]

randy, the subaru outback sport has been out for 20 years now

[19-percent]

anyone who enjoys room temperature water is Not A Real Person and probably part of the Lizard Government

[19-percent]

This raises many questions to me, too many to list, however the main one is why that bitch CARRIED HER BIG ASS TELEPHONE into the kitchen just to look fake shocked and get fuckin rekt by random a strangely proportioned tiger. But I digress.

[19-percent]

Whoever designed humans to get itches on parts of their backs that we can’t reach: you are sick and a musty bitch

[avant-gardevoir-old-deactivated]

who has the image where it says albert einstein lived in a house made of cheese and failed the driving test 8000 times

[headkicker-ii-the-final-kick-de]

[acoolguy]

me as a hotel receptionist: *greets guests by playing hotel california but cutting it off right before they say california*

[19-percent]

Me, on my 60th sit up: *continues to lay down and DOES NOT sit up*

My dance teacher: come on ! It’s mind over matter ! Your body can do it your mind just has to tell it to !

My body: hahaha NOPE

My mind: lmao eh

[shez-a-dove-deactivated20161204]

who are u in a group of friends like what’s your Role

[midtown120blues-deactivated2018]

name: clay

role:

clay

[itchycoil]

I’m clay

[midtown120blues-deactivated2018]

wrong

i’m clay

[19-percent]

You know you’ve made it as a dentist when you engrave your name into your patients toothbrushes

[fb9062]

amazon bring me….my child

[fb9062]

SON???????????

[fb9062]

He’s ok just wrinkly

[snagerdragon]

he was vacuum sealed

[murdernachos]

[19-percent]

Food network contestant: it's held together by carmel, hopes, and prayers

An accurate description of my life