[1dentifie]

#1DENTIFIE. independent + private writing blog [headcanon─heavy] for deacon from the fallout series. scrutinized [lovingly] by lis. other blogs: unlament, maidmyth. ♡

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[1dentifie]

DATA SOURCE, starter call. USER, @betrayale.

" ah, the brotherhood... the holier-than-thou brotherhood. you met any of 'em yet? "

[thoughtcascades]

every time i get close to someone i feel like a stray dog trying to live in a house. like i don’t know where to put my body or how loud i’m allowed to be.

[lastvalyrian]

Referring to a canon character as "my oc" because I put more work into them than the author

[1dentifie]

🥁 A battle song for my muse

DATA SOURCE, song associations. USER, @1defense.

i tried to find a song from his playlist with lyrics but couldn't pick one out because honestly ... in the house, in a heartbeat by john murphy really gives me 'battle' vibes for him. he's not really a battle-y guy, more of a in the shadows / playing it safe until it's not safe then he has to fight up close & personal type so i'm very sorry </33

[indulgentprompts]

Send ✢ to discover that my muse has been hiding an injury.

[1dentifie]

if i made a small private blog for my fallout oc girlies would you all write with them …

[rainyprompts]

✧✦⭒ SONG ASSOCIATIONS —

send a symbol and i’ll give you a corresponding song for the prompt!

🎼 A song that reminds me of my muse’s vibes

🎶 A song that reminds me of my muse’s backstory

🎧 A song used for writing my muse

🥁 A battle song for my muse

🎭 A sad song for my muse

🎉 A happy song for my muse

📣 A song for when my muse is upset or angry

⚡ A song that my muse would listen to

🎆 A song my muse would sing or dance to

🎺 An instrumental song for my muse

✨ A theme song for my muse

🔊 A leitmotif for my muse

🌠 A song for our muses

🖤 A song for our muses’ ship

🔮 A random song from my muse’s playlist

[1dentifie]

Do you think Pitbull exists in the fallout universe. Do you think deacon knows him

actually pitbull was supposed to be in fallout 4 as a fellow frozen survivor of vault 111 / companion but todd howard said there could be only one bald companion so him & deacon had to duel . deacon won

[1dentifie]

Do you personally think Deacon was telling the truth during his final approval talk ?

oh anon …. i have been waiting for someone to ask this!!!!!! do not give me this Power …

[1dentifie]

i am going to admit something. i think that when deacon truly & genuinely smiles — it’s actually a really nice sight. not a smirk, not a faux smile, not a hair one, but a real one that actually reaches his eyes (if sunglasses are off) crinkles their corners. it’s … refreshing, honestly.

[weedass]

woke up and turned over and there was a roach next to me.... wtf did we do last night....?

[1dentifie]

remind me when i’m not so sleepy that deacon probably (definitely) knows he’s seen as more of an asset / weapon than an actual person in the railroad but doesn’t mind because at least that gives him one form of solid identity for him to hold onto ……..

[weltenwellen]

Wildness Before Something Sublime Leila Chatti

[prophecyprompts]

#UNRELEASED. assortment of lyrics from some unreleased marina songs. links to songs are in title for those who may not have heard them before. ♡

SCAB & PLASTER. ♫

you can’t communicate.

i can’t communicate.

i’ve nothing left to say.

oh, are we out of luck?

you shut me in, you shut me out.

i’ve lost my confidence.

in a cup of loneliness, i found instant relief.

i'd prefer to be alone than live a life that’s not my own.

i found my self-belief.

you tell me what to say & wear — you say it’s because you care.

i’ve lost my innocence.

if nobody could see, i’d hold my hand out to be held.

PHILOSOPHER MY ARSE. ♫

your theories, your beliefs, & the way you preach for peace: it sounds like vomit to my ears.

i know when something’s amiss.

don’t think you can fucking lie to me.

let me fall & kiss your feet — everybody knows they're cleaner than your lips.

i’m not easy to defeat.

philosopher, my ass.

your whole life’s a scam.

your words leave your mouth pretty fast.

how can you compare yourself?

don’t cheat me. don’t you cheat me.

JEALOUSY. ♫

i’m embarrassed to confess.

what is taking over me?

i never say a word, in case i come off needy.

i’ll leave you before you leave me.

i want you to belong to me.

i think that’s called jealousy.

it’s so easy when you don’t belong to me.

is it you, or is it me?

i think i’m fine, i think i’m tough, until i go & fall in love.

the more i hide, the worse i feel.

STARLIGHT. ♫

you had a sad urge to be wanted by fools.

well done, pinocchio, you told a lie.

i'm so lonely.

the broken spend their nights staring at the sky.

won't you hold me?

stars shine but it's only old light. it's been dead for a long time.

stars & love burn bright 'till they're ready to die.

now it's time bury the hatchet & bury it deep.

i wouldn't take advantage of a cut-up heart.

you've a massive heart.

we sow what we reap.

i need time just to roam; find a place i can call home.

we grew up as solitary souls.

love is like starlight: even when a star dies, you can still see it shine. but it's only old light.

sometimes it's better to be on your own.

they said i was too good for you.

love is starlight.

DOUBLE LIFE. ♫

you play the innocent.

am i glory-seeking scum?

i know that i'm stuck inside a double life.

am i charismatic?

am i just completely average?

that mask is brilliant.

i can call your double bluff.

i don't know why, but every single time i try to tell the truth, i tell a lie.

I'M NOT HUNGRY ANYMORE. ♫

i always thought that i would die if i didn't have you by my side, but i've changed my mind.

i don't care what the future holds as long as i love & grow old.

that feeling's gone.

now i don't even know what i need you for.

i'm not hungry for your love anymore.

that chip on my shoulder is almost gone.

maybe i'm not who i was trying to be.

maybe there's another road for me.

connect the dots from a to b.

been feeling like myself more than ever before.

maybe i was wrong all along.

i'm not hungry for love anymore.

all my worries are gone, i'm enjoying the ride.

that savage desire to belong.

don't even bother feeding me your bullshit.

there's no rush anymore, time's on my side.

DEMONS & ANGELS. ♫

i tried to change, but i can't get a grip.

i'm broken in so many ways.

maybe i shouldn't try to change.

happiness was for other people.

if i got rid of my demons, i'd lose my angels.

i believe that what i feel can set me free.

oh, angel.

maybe i don't need to change.

never know where the wind could blow.

there are so many reasons why life is painful.

i guess i like to be alone.

i know i'm flawed in many ways.

i still wonder how i got buried under.

i guess i'm always waiting to be fixed, but maybe this is it.

[1dentifie]

DEACON'S REAL NAME. from both my personal headcanon list & what's hinted towards in-game, i think his true name is either john or johnny. if you look through the railroad's terminal entries, there's talk about an agent (a runner) named john d. (probably john doe, as is the stereotypical first & last name for "unknowns".) he continues to be talked about in a few more entries, including the beginning of the dead-drop system, until he just stops appearing altogether. until...... dun dun dun! pinky becomes the leader! in december of 2273, it says:

also: john / johnny / john d. doesn't appear in any more entries after this, even in desdemona's entries when she became leader, but the name "deacon" does – only after 2273. now of course there's no guarantee this 100% means john changed his name to deacon. but the way it's worded, along with the fact that there's really no one else it could be referring to, i truly do think this is referring to the deacon we know & love in fallout 4. :')

[tall]