I see the notifications from time to time of someone liking my writing but how many of you are still there?
It‘s been five years since I‘ve last posted on here, since I‘ve written anything. Life has been super hectic but also super amazing to me and I never left our fandom. I just had so much stuff going on that I usually only read stories instead of writing but guess what? I started writing again.
Looking through my To-Do list made me so excited so I just wanted to check in if anyone would even be interested in me posting stuff again?
Alright my loves - even though I‘m quite sure that it was the same anon who requested it, I don’t know for sure so the prompt I‘m going to do next is number 11:
Can you Do a Harry centric one (I’ve known harrys popular atm.) he gets raped (you don’t have to be graphic about it) on his solo tour and Mitch finds out and Calls the boys
I already started writing it but things are going to take some time. I‘m going on holiday with my mum today (5 relaxing days at the spa), so I won‘t be able to write much. However I‘ll try my best to fill this one rather soon!
Guys please check out the ask I got on my blog. I‘m apparently too dumb to do a survey so just send me a number or suggestions of how I should change the prompt and I‘ll decide which one is going to be my next story in three days :)
Just send me a number between 1 and 12 and we‘ll see.
Hello! You said you have a lot of Harry prompts that some people sent you. Can you please put it on a list? So we can try to help you choose. And your last prompt was really really good. I'm addicted to your prompts hahahahaha
Thank you babe Xx Here‘s the list of my Personal favorite prompts. I‘m going to choose between them but could use a Little help finding the right one. I‘m also Open for suggetions and changes in the plots :) Xx
1.The boys have a really important interview but Harry is sick so they brush him off when he tries to get out of it and he ends up passing out and getting rushed to hospital.
2.There’s a fire in the studio where the boys are at and Harry gets trapped inside.
3.Niam parents where Harry is bullied. Zayn and Louis find him beat up. They can either be his brothers, friends or strangers
4. Harry used to be bullied at school before 1D. He struggles with fame because everyone says he’s good looking but he still believes that he is ugly. And he secretly cuts himself on his legs so the boys won’t see it. And one day Louis catches him cutting and he breaks down and Louis tells him all the physical and non-physical things that he loves about him.
5. I was watching “One way or another” from the Brits 2013 and Harry seemed really out of breath & I saw him coughing a lot before & after the performance so I was thinking: What if Harry is feels bad right before they are going on stage for whatever live award show and can feel himself starting having an asthma attack? He’s still forced to go on stage because he’s out of breath but still can sing, right? 1D boys are worried for him but the show must go on. They perform and Harry is fabulous. He hits every notes but his breathing is not the best. He looks out of it & is really tired at the end. As soon as Harry leaves the stage he has the biggest asthma attack ever and has to go to hospital. The next day critics attack Harry’s performance and make fun of him. Management hides the asthma attack & want him to apologize to the fans. The boys won’t let him and tell the world how proud they are of Harry for singing while he was in real pain. Truth is out.
6.I have a Larry friendship prompt. Harry doesn’t have any friends except for Louis who’s been his only friend since kindergarten and Louis have tons if friends and is one of the populars, and they have a fight one night and Louis tells Harry that the only reason he’s still friends with such a loser as him because he feels bad for him. After that he leaves and moves on while Harry is left all alone and is falling deeper and deeper into depression and starts cutting. And they meet again and Louis cries and apologies for what he said that he didn’t mean it but Harry dosen’t believe him because he thinks so low of himself, and Louis does everything in his power to get the cheerful cheeky harry back but Harry is still depressed, but when he tries to kill himself Louis find him and saves his life and in the end harry forgives Louis
7. The boys have a fight and afterwards the boys start ignoring Harry and after a while Harry leaves the band and goes back to Holmes Chapel. After a year the boys realize their mistake and go find him and win him back. Much hurt, angst and fluff.
8. Can you do a Harry Centric where’s Hes pregnant and the boys don’t know and he leaves suddenly in the middle of otra without telling them and 2 years later Niall and Liam found Harry who there twins Olivia and Jagger sitting at the park and they found he’s living on the streets ? Also bonus if Niall is the Babies father of the Girl and Liam is father of the boy he had triplets but misscarries the third one .
9. Can you do a prompt where Harry has 3 sisters and their mother dies so Harry has to take care of them and brings them on tour? Maybe during OTRA. And Harry starts to distance himself from the boys and the crew and acting really rude trying to hide how broken he is.
10. Can You do a Harry and Niall Centric where they’re both on tour depressed Harry still getting even he’s solo and one hate comment gets to him and Niall is sad also Louis and Liam fly to Niall’s concert thinking Harry can handle his own depression but they saw on the news that harry is in the hospital and they blame themselves
11. Can you Do a Harry centric one (I’ve known harrys popular atm.) he gets raped (you don’t have to be graphic about it) on his solo tour and Mitch finds out and Calls the boys
12. Can you do one where Harry has a service/therapy dog because he has severe depression and anxiety?
Hi! I know you posted the story days ago but I really love your work. Are you working on anything else now and if so,What's the story? Sorry about my english
Hi love! Don‘t worry about your english, it‘s fine :) Well I‘m currently trying to think of my next prompt. Not sure which one it‘ll be but I‘m open for suggestions. Once I figure it out I‘ll start working on it but it‘ll probably take a lot of time for me to get it done since life is super hectic at the moment 😅
Prompt: Can you do one where Harry is a prostitute and lives with the Boys but they don’t know what he’s doing for a Living and one day they find out and then Harry gets hurt.
„Niall how often do I have to tell you to put your clothes away?” Liam yelled as he ran through the apartment, picking up dirty socks, shirts and trousers.
“Oh, eyes what has gotten his knickers into a twist?” Niall, the blond boy, asked Louis, who was sitting at the table right next to him, eating cornflakes and sipping on his way too hot coffee.
Louis looked up from his phone and just shrugged his shoulders, also not knowing what was going with Liam this morning.
Before he even had the chance to answer, Liam stormed into the kitchen and threw all the clothes on the table, right next to Niall’s plate. The blond boy shrieked and got up, looking at Liam angrily.
“Jesus what is wrong with you?” he questioned, sounding annoyed.
“Did you guys really forget?” Liam replied, rolling his eyes. He took a deep breath upon seeing his flat mates’ confused faces and then continued to talk. “Harry is moving in today. He should be here in a few minutes.”
“And you’re trying to tidy the flat because…?”
“Because that’s what you do when someone moves in,” the twenty-year old answered before dropping down in one of the chairs, running his hand through his uncombed hair.
“Let’s see how long he’s going to stay then. Hopefully longer than Peter and Marc and the guy before Marc and the guy before him. Maybe the room is cursed?”
“Or maybe it is because you lot don’t know how to behave,” Liam argued, and his mouth dropped open in shock when Zayn walked into the kitchen wearing nothing but a towel that was bound loosely around his waist.
“What is going on with you?” Louis questioned once again. “He’s going to get used to our way of living anyway so why the fuss?”
“Because it’d be nice to finally have someone living here who is willing to stay longer than a few weeks. It’d be nice to have five people paying rent instead of just four!”
“Okay, okay, I’m going to put some clothes on then,” Zayn surrendered, not wanting to upset Liam any further. He held his hands up in defense as he walked out of the room, sending both Niall and Louis a wink.
Louis however only eyed his best friend from head to toe and shook his head slightly. He had never understood how Liam could be this kind and perfect. He didn’t have any flaws. Like literally. He was always polite and friendly, looking out for others and sometimes Louis wondered that Liam didn’t let some homeless person sleep in the room instead.
The thing about their apartment was that it hadn’t always been easy. Liam and Louis had grown up together in Doncaster. They had been best friends since kindergarten and one day the two boys had decided to move to London together. Their families, especially their mothers, hadn’t been happy about the fact that their baby boys were moving so far away but had supported them nevertheless.
Liam and Louis had always liked the idea of living with someone else and so they had rented this rather big apartment in the middle of London. It consisted of five bedrooms, one bathroom, a living room and the kitchen. To help their sons find roommates a little bit quicker Johannah and Karen, their mothers, had bought furniture for the other rooms so that there was a bed, a wardrobe, a desk and a chair in them at least.
After moving in Liam and Louis had walked around the neighborhood with posters, handing them to a lot of people, hoping to find some roommates soon. They had stopped to get some coffee, the posters lying next to them on the table when the blond waiter, who had just brought them some doughnuts and coffee, had shown interest in one of the rooms.
Liam and Louis had waited for Niall until his shift had been over and had taken him back to their flat to show him what it looked like. Niall had been amazed and had agreed right then that he was going to move in and so it had happened that only five days later the blond boy had stood in front of the door with his belongings and had made his way into their lives.
With Niall’s funny, loud and outgoing personality they had become friends rather quick and still were up to this day.
A few weeks after Niall had moved in Zayn, a quiet boy from somewhere up in Bradford, had contacted Liam via E-Mail, asking about a room. The two of them had bonded instantly over the phone and so Zayn had become part of their lives as well.
Finding the fifth person to live with them had been a hassle ever since. There had been a lot of people but for some reason none of them had fitted in. Liam, Louis, Niall and Zayn had become such close friends over a short amount of time that they were like brothers now, having banter going on between them and just having a really good time. However, the fifth person, or the missing piece like Liam always said, had yet to be found.
There had been this absolute nerd guy who had always made a fuss about everyone needing to be quiet after 10 pm because he needed to sleep. He had always complained whenever someone had left something lying around or when they had had friends over because he needed to study for uni and every distraction was annoying to him. Niall had referred to him as Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory and they hadn’t been surprised when he had moved out again after two months.
After that there had been a guy whose name Liam couldn’t even remember. He had been staying with them for a month and they had barely seen him during the time he had lived with them. He had always been inside of his room, not interacting with them in the slightest and three weeks after moving in, he had handed Liam his rent for the month and had told him that he was leaving the day after tomorrow.
There had been two other people whose names Liam also couldn’t remember and then there had been Marc. Marc had been a friendly, twenty-two-year-old boy who had moved from Spain to the UK. He had been funny and friendly, the boys becoming friends with him and all of them had thought that they had finally found the missing piece until Niall had come home a little bit earlier one day and had found Marc in his bedroom, looking through his things, stealing some money from his money box.
Niall had quickly confronted Marc about this, the older boy handing back the money, trying to find a way out of this situation but Zayn, Liam, Louis and Niall had all decided that they didn’t want to live with someone who stole money from them and so they had kicked him out a week later.
Peter, the last guy that had lived with them, had been much like this nerd guy. He had studied all of the time, always complaining about loud noises or sometimes even about laughter or the TV being too loud. He had then started to hide the remote of the TV but Louis being Louis, had then started turning on the music so loud that Peter had given the remote back instantly, begging Louis to turn off the music instead. Things like that had been going on for three months until one Friday night where Liam, Louis, Niall and Zayn had decided to stay in and play FIFA. They had drunk some beer and had had a really nice time until Peter had stormed into the room. He had turned off the TV and then had started yelling about them being way too loud and it had been Louis who had told him to fuck off and so Peter had packed his things straight away and had left.
This had been six weeks ago and while Louis, Niall and Zayn didn’t really care about paying a little bit more rent, Liam hated having an empty room and had started looking for a new flat mate again. A week ago, he had told them that someone had called him and since he had been busy Liam had given him a tour over Skype, showing him their flat and apparently the lad had decided to move in right away.
Louis thoughts were interrupted when the doorbell rang, and Liam shot up from his seat. Niall grumpily grabbed his clothes and walked out of the room as well, probably throwing his clothing right into his room, not caring about keeping his room tidy.
Turning back to his phone and coffee, Louis could hear Liam at the door, greeting someone who he was sure was this Harry guy.
“So here is the living room and the kitchen is right there. Louis is inside,” the oldest boy heard Liam’s voice come closer to him and looked up just in time when his best friend walked into the room, Harry following right behind.
For a moment blue eyes met green ones and time seemed to stand still.
**
30 Minutes earlier somewhere in London
Harry Styles was close to running, pushing through people that were busy getting to the underground station as well. Some of them were carrying large bags, some of them were looking like tourists but that wouldn’t be a surprise since Harry was at Kings Cross station, one of the biggest hotspots for tourists in London. He knew that he was going to be late if he didn’t hurry and so he quickly swiped his Oyster card through the card holder and then continued moving faster than most of the people, rasping out some apologies whenever he bumped into someone.
He was holding tightly on the strap of his bag that kept bumping into his leg, probably leaving a bruise. His backpack felt even heavier now, the straps hurting his shoulders. Harry reached the platform and tried to catch his breath when he saw that a train was approaching. Checking the time once more he smiled when he realized that he was going to be on time at least now.
Harry had found this flyer of some guys looking for a flat mate lying around in some coffee and he was in desperate need of a place to sleep anyway and so he had called the number, that had been written on the paper. Liam, the name that had been written in a childish looking handwriting, had answered the call after the second ring.
Harry’s life hadn’t always been easy and still wasn’t up to this day. He had grown up in Holmes Chapel, Cheshire, as an only child to Anne and Desmond Styles.
His mother had always been a loving and caring woman and his father had been just the same. Harry still loved to think back to the days were his father would teach him how to ride a bike or how to play football. One day, Harry had been six years old, his father had come home from work like usual, had played and messed around with his son, had kissed him goodnight and the next morning he had been gone. Desmond had disappeared in the night with all of his belonging, not even saying goodbye to his wife.
From this day on it had just been Harry and Anne until Robin had come along. Harry had gotten along very well with Robin, liking the man for always being so nice and friendly, treating his mother with respect and helping her out financially. He had accepted Harry as his son and the curly haired boy had started calling him dad not long after his mother and Robin had gotten married nearly two years later.
It had been a big party and from this day on Harry’s heart had felt whole again. Things had been great back then. He had always had lots of friends in school, his grades had been good, and his family had been nice and friendly until one day.
The teenager had noticed early in his life that he didn’t feel attracted to girls. He had always caught himself staring at other boys and after a kiss, that he had shared with his best friend Sarah, hadn’t made his stomach erupt in butterflies he had come to the conclusion that he was gay.
It had been on Harry’s sixteenth birthday when he had finally found the courage to tell his parents. Back then he had been sure that there was nothing to be worried about but before the words had been fully out of his mouth Robin had interrupted him, saying that he didn’t want a fagot to be his son and the he was disgusted by him.
What had hurt Harry even more than his stepfather telling him that he was disgusted by him, was the fact that his own mother hadn’t taken his side. She had stood right next to her husband, silently telling Harry whose side she was on.
From this day on Harry had been treated like he didn’t exist. All of a sudden, his parents hadn’t talked to him or asked him about his day. They hadn’t bothered to ask if he wanted to eat dinner with them, or if there was anything else that he might need. Harry had been a stranger at his own home. There had been weeks where he hadn’t exchanged a single word with his mother because she had treated him like he simply wasn’t there. It had hurt even worse than being called names or having his parents say anything to him.
On some days Harry had wished that they would just start yelling at him, showing him recognition in some way but they had been silent, not bothering to look up when he had come home late or to ask what he was going to do on the weekends. One day Harry hadn’t come home, silently hoping that his mother would be worried but when he had come home the following day his mother had just looked at him shortly not even saying a single word.
Harry had started to fall into depression. His own mother and her husband (Harry hadn’t thought about calling him dad any longer) were disgusted by him, his friends had quickly noticed his change of behavior and had given him space at first but the teenager hadn’t made an attempt to get back to them and so he had drifted away from his friends as well. One by one they had left and when Harry had found himself sitting at his lunch table alone one day he felt like he was being choked, a panic attack creeping up on him, hitting him hard but no one had cared about the crying and shaking boy in the middle of the cafeteria, no one.
Harry had finished school four months after his eighteenth birthday (another birthday that had gone by unnoticed by his family, Harry crying himself to sleep on this day) and his mother and Robin had waited for him to come home today. A strange feeling had settled into Harry’s stomach when he had arrived at home but for some childish reason he had misinterpreted things. Harry had wished for his mother to jump into his arms and to apologize for all the things she had said, and he would’ve forgiven her straight away, but he had been wrong. Oh, how wrong he had been.
Harry still felt shivers racking through his body whenever he remembered his mother’s hateful stare and her icy voice when she had simply told him to go upstairs to grab his stuff and never come back.
Tears had run down Harry’s face as he had begged for Anne and Robin to give him some time. He had to find a job, a place to stay but Robin had stood tall and had threatened to throw him out right away without giving him a chance to pack his stuff and so Harry had scrambled up the stairs to his room to pack his bags.
A few minutes later he had found himself standing outside of the door of his childhood home, tears streaming down his face. He had begged his mother for forgiveness, had promised her that he’d never look at a boy again and that he would be the son she wanted him to be, but they hadn’t shown mercy, shutting the door right into his face.
Harry had broken down right there, at the front door of the place he had had so many good memories of. He had sobbed for a long time, all of his belongings sitting in the suitcase right next to him, when it had slowly started to think in that he was indeed homeless now.
After another few minutes Harry had gotten up and had decided to leave. He hadn’t had any reason to stay in Holmes Chapel a minute longer. The walk to the railway station was actually quite short but for Harry it had felt like an eternity.
He hadn’t had a lot of money and he had known back then that he had to be money-conscious and so he had simply bought a one-way ticket to London, not knowing where else to go.
A few hours later, it had been shorty after six p.m., Harry had found himself standing at Kings Cross. He had been there before, his mother taking him to trips from time to time, but never had he felt so lost and helpless.
Harry had decided that he needed a place to sleep and so he had gone to this hotel, not knowing where else to go. The room had been rather cheap, and Harry hadn’t cared back then. He had longed for a safe place to stay to wrap his mind around what had happened on this day.
He had thought back then that life couldn’t get any worse, but he had been wrong, so damn wrong.
**
“Hello, I. I’m. I need to check-out,” Harry mumbled as he stood in front of the receptionist. The older looking man eyed the curly haired boy from head to toe and accepted the room-key that Harry had placed on the counter.
“You’ve been here for seven days. Did you have a nice stay?” the man asked politely, and Harry nodded his head whilst playing with the sleeves of his shirt, not daring to look the man into the eyes.
“Yes,” he mumbled in response. “How much is the room?”
“So, let me see,” the man said, and Harry internally cursed himself for staying at the hotel for so long when he could’ve found to find something cheaper, but he had needed some time to think about his options, to clear his head. “Seven days, without breakfast or anything from room-service. That would be 680 pounds, sir. Would you like to pay by card or cash?”
“Credit Card would be fine,” Harry replied, and the receptionist nodded, then used the information that Harry had had to give before checking in and handed the teenager the receipt.
“I just need a signature here then.”
Harry did what he had been told, signed the paper and then quickly turned around, grabbed his suitcase and left the hotel.
It was summer in London, the weather nice and the temperature decent. It wasn’t too hot or too cold and it wasn’t raining today. Once Harry stepped out of the hotel he silently prepared himself for what was to come.
He had spent the last seven days thinking about his future. He had once had enough money, his mother and father always making sure to put something on his bank account and after Desmond had disappeared Anne and Robin had put money on his bank account every month. Harry had worked at the local bakery on Saturdays, earning some money as well but since his mother had stopped given a fuck about him, Harry had had to pay for a lot more things.
Luckily Anne hadn’t told him to pay for his room back in his childhood home, but he had to go grocery shopping for himself, he had had to buy clothes, toiletries, some other stuff that teenagers needed. Harry hadn’t gotten any presents on his birthday or Christmas and one day he had bought himself a new laptop needing one for school.
He had spent a lot of money in the past two years and money was tight now. His stay at the hotel had been much needed for himself and his mind but it had been bad for his bank-account. The curly haired boy knew that he had about 500 pounds left so he really needed to find a job rather quick.
When he had been younger Harry had wanted to go to college to become a writer. He wanted to study English Arts but knew that he had to let go off this plan in order to find a job and earn some money.
Harrys feet were aching from walking through the city with his suitcase and backpack the entire time and so he bought himself some food (a cheeseburger and some fries) and headed down to the Themes. There were so many bridges and Harry found himself sitting on a bench near Westminster bridge, right next to the London Eye, looking at the tourists. He could hear people laughing and talking, could see them taking pictures and having the time of their lives while he was just sitting here, not knowing what to do with his life.
Night came quickly, and Harry pulled a hoodie out from his suitcase and continued to sit there. He knew that he should get some sleep but how was he supposed to get some sleep? He had never had to sleep outside and if he had he had done this for fun but now he was sitting on this bench in London, his belongings right next to him and Harry had learned that being in London meant being in danger of being robbed and he knew that he looked like the perfect target and so he simply couldn’t go to sleep.
It was past midnight, Harry had trouble keeping his eyes open and there were barely tourists anymore, when someone approached the younger boy. Harry tensed right then and sat up straight, eyeing the man from head to toe. He was older than him, probably in his late twenties or early thirties. He looked good. He was wearing black skinny jeans that fitted perfectly around his tall frame and a white shirt. He had light blond hair and a little stubble on his face and sat down right next to the curly haired boy.
“So just tell me. Your flight got cancelled and you don’t have money for another night at the hotel?” the man questioned as he eyed Harry’s belongings.
For some reason Harry chuckled at the suggestion. Oh god was he wrong.
“Far from it,” he replied and the added “There is no flight, the rest if quite right actually.”
“How old are you?”
“I’m eighteen.”
“So, what are you doing here on your own, without money at the age of eighteen then?”
Harry swallowed then looked the man in the eyes. His eyes were brown and warm and something about him seemed to calm the younger boy down. He knew better than to talk to strangers, but it had been so long since he had had a normal conversation with someone and what did he have to lose anyway?
“My parents kicked me out for being gay a week ago. I stood at a hotel for a week but it’s too expensive, so I left today. I tried to find a job but no such luck and now I’m trying to figure out what to do,” Harry explained.
It was probably the shortest version of explaining what had happened to him, but he was only telling the truth.
“That sounds rough,” the other man answered. “I’m David by the way.”
“Harry.”
“Nice to meet you, Harry,” David replied politely.
They sat in silence for a little while longer until Harry spoke up.
“What are you doing out here?” Harry blurted out and David only chuckled.
“I had a rough day today and needed to get some fresh air and London is actually quite nice by night. Then I saw you siting there, looking lost and figured I should ask you what’s wrong.”
“Thanks for that. It’s nice having someone to talk to,” Harry answered honestly.
“You’re very welcome. Listen I should get going. I know this sounds weird, but do you need a place to crash at? I live with some mates of mine at an apartment and there is a spare bedroom that I could offer you.”
“How much?”
“Don’t worry about the money right now. We can work something out for sure, but I’d feel so bad if I let you sit here. Come with me, get some rest and then you can try to get back to your feet if you want to. I might be able to help you finding a job as well.”
Harry was left speechless. He was being offered a room and maybe even a job. For free? He knew that he shouldn’t trust someone like David because he didn’t know him at all, didn’t know if he was telling the truth or not but something about him seemed right and for some reason Harry wasn’t afraid. He was more afraid of staying outside and having no place to go to than to go with a stranger. How much worse could his life get anyway?
“I. I mean. I don’t know if I can accept that,” he stuttered but David squeezed his knew slightly in reassurance.
“You can also stay out here if you like it better. Listen, I’m going to catch a cab and if you decide to accept my offer than come with me, if not it was nice meeting you, Harry.”
David stood up from the bench, stretched his limbs and started walking away and just a second later Harry scrambled from the bench and followed to older man who smiled at him.
*
Harry woke up the next morning and needed a minute to remember what had happened. David had taken him home to his place. It was a big apartment that he shared with three other men, who had all been out the night before, so Harry hadn’t met them yet. David had shown him the spare bedroom that was rather small yet better than sleeping on the streets and had left, giving Harry some privacy.
The curly haired boy had been exhausted and had been asleep the moment his head had hit the pillow. Harry quickly looked around and saw his backpack and suitcase still standing right next to the door where he had left them. His phone was still lying next to him and so he figured that he hadn’t been robbed.
Slowly but surely, he got out of bed and walked into the hallway. Looking around he saw four closed doors and two that were open. He walked over to the open door and found the kitchen. David was sitting at the table, drinking coffee. He didn’t hear Harry enter so the curly haired boy cleared his throat, making David look up.
“Good morning Harry. Did you sleep well?” he questioned as his eyes roamed over Harry’s body, making the teenager blush.
He was only wearing boxers and a white shirt. Harry cursed himself for not putting on some more clothes in the first place.
“Yes, I did, thank you. Are the others still asleep?”, he questioned as he looked at the clock and noticed that it was only shortly after eight o’clock.
“They were out quite long last night. Jack got home at 5.30. They’re probably going to sleep a little while longer. There is a lot of food in the fridge, just take whatever you want.” David offered and once again Harry was amazed by how kind the man was.
“Thank you so much. We need to talk about the money again.”
“Harry, you need to find a job first in order to be able to pay for anything,” David reminded him, and Harry nodded his head, knowing that he was right.
“You said something about being able to find me a job. What did you mean by that?”
“We can talk about this later, now eat.”
“I’d really like to know. I need to get a job and earn some money.”
“Fine, okay,” David replied as he got up from his seat, looking quite angry all of a sudden, making Harry freeze. “You’re stubborn I like that!”
Harry’s eyes widened in shock when David strode over to him and closed the distance between the two of them, leaving Harry no place to get away. He was pressed against the kitchen counter, David standing right in front of him.
“I know a good bitch when I see one and you, my boy, are perfect. The moment I laid eyes on you and knew that you’d be my new boy. I’m a pimp and the boys that are living here are my whores. They make money by selling themselves for sex. They are allowed to live here with me. They have to pay rent like everyone else, but they earn up to 1000 pounds by night. I rescued them all like I did with you and I know that you need the money so do we have a deal, here?”
Harry’s mouth was hanging open in shock, his eyes wide. Did David literally just offer him a job as a prostitute? Harry had never been with a boy before. He had kissed and had jerked himself off, but not once had he had sex with another guy and he definitely wasn’t going to do this. There had to be another way.
“What? No, no, I’m not doing this. Let me go now,” he replied and pushed at the taller man’s chest, trying to get away but David stood still and didn’t move an inch.
“If you don’t do this then you’re going straight back to the streets, but I expect a little payment for letting you drive with the taxi with me and for letting you sleep here. You better get down to your knees and start sucking then!”
Harry felt panic rising in his chest. There was no way that he was going to do this. No way. He wasn’t a whore and definitely wasn’t going to suck on someone’s dick to pay for being allowed to crash at their place. This was so messed up.
“Let me go. You can get money for letting me stay here and then I’ll be gone!”
“Okay fine gives me your money then. I expect 150.”
“Okay, okay let me get it for you,” Harry quickly replied and bolted for the door once David stepped back. He blindly ran through the hallway, back to his room and reached for his backpack. He found his wallet at the bottom of the backpack and fished it out. Upon opening it his eyes widened in shock. His money was gone and so was his credit card. There was nothing there anymore.
“So, where is your money then?” David questioned, and Harry turned around to find him leaning against the doorframe of the room, smirking.
“You!” he breathed out heavily, anger rising. “You stole it. Give it back!”
“I don’t have anything. I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
“Okay that’s it,” Harry replied as he grabbed his backpack and suitcase and made his way over to the door where David was standing. “Let me go, I’m leaving!”
“I don’t think you are babe.”
“Get out of my way!”
“Or what? What are you going to do?”
“Please let me go,” Harry begged, tears forming in his eyes. It would be an understatement to say that he was scared.
“I don’t think so baby. I chose you to be me new bitch and you’re going to be great. Now have you ever had sex before? I bet my ass that you’re a virgin.”
Harry started crying right on the spot, standing in front of David, the man he had trusted to be his savior. He had been betrayed, had been lied to and now he was stuck here. There was no way of getting out and even if he did manage to get to the door Harry was quite sure that there were some more surprises waiting for him.
“Please let me go,” he begged one more time but David only chuckled.
“I suggest you get down on your knees now, so we can start to practice!” he replied cruelly, and Harry wished to die right here on the spot.
*
The following weeks were pure horror for Harry. Ever since he had been “captured” by David he had wanted to end his life on a daily basis. He had quickly learned that he had only been told lies.
After Harry had figured out that he wasn’t going to get out of the flat David had started practicing with him. The curly haired boy had given his first blowjob, had been fucked and hit and had been taught so many things that he still felt a shiver run down his back whenever he remembered what had happened to him.
He had quickly learned that the other boys that were living had a familiar story than himself to share. They had all been abandoned by their families and had been used by David to make money. Harry had learned that David had another flat rented at the building he was living in and that he was using this one for his costumers. There were bodyguards and whenever one of the men was finished they handed the money straight to the bodyguard instead of the boys themselves. They never saw a single pound and if they got a tip David would usually find out and take it from them as well.
David had taken Harry’s phone as well as his passport so that he didn’t have anything. The only thing that he had was a bed to sleep in and a roof over his head but the price for this had been extremely high and Harry wanted to go back to living on the streets so badly.
Every night he had to get ready and move across the hallway into the other apartment and wait for men to come over and fuck him. Some of them had really dirty minds, wanting to live out their kinks and even though they were never allowed to hurt them physically Harry was left being sore almost every single night.
Apparently, Harry was good at doing his “job” as he was highly requested by the costumers and it made him sick to the stomach. He had always dreamed of having a loving boyfriend who he would make love with but now he was being used as a fucktoy for some people’s desires and it scared to shit out of him.
It had been exactly eight weeks since Harry had started his new job and he couldn’t do this anymore. He barely got to see David but one day he was there when Harry got up in the morning and so he decided to quit. This had to be possible, right?
“Hey David,” Harry said as he approached his “boss”.
“Hi there,” David replied casually as if he was doing nothing wrong. He committed a crime every single night by letting Harry get fucked by other men, by holding him hostage against his will, by threatening him yet he didn’t give a damn.
“I want to quit!” Harry blurted out and all of a sudden David’s expression changed from normal to angry.
“You want to quit? Is that so?”
Harry nodded his head, mentally preparing himself for what was to come.
“Alright well you’re so lucky that I found another boy last night who was more willing to do this job than you’ve ever been. I want you to give me 5.000 pounds and then you’re free to go. You’ll even get your passport back!”
“5000?” Harry questioned, raising his voice. How was he supposed to give David 5000 pounds?
“You have a week. If you can’t get it done by then you’re staying. If you manage to earn the money I’ll let you go, I promise!”
On a normal night Harry made around 600 pounds, depending on how many costumers he had but making 5000 in a week was like an impossible task but no matter what Harry had to try. He had to get away from here, he had to find another way to live.
“Okay, I’ll give you the money in one week.” He told David who only shrugged his shoulders and walked away.
*
Exactly one-week later Harry was stepping outside of the building he had been living in for the past nine weeks. He was sore all over, his body aching from the things that had been done to him in the past week, but he had somehow managed to earn the money and so David had kept his word and had let him go.
Now he was back on the streets, having not even a pound but Harry knew that it was still better than being someone’s whore without actually earning some money. One of the other boys he had lived with had told him to go over to Kings Cross at night and wait for costumers. He would be able to earn his own money there and even though Harry was disgusted by himself for doing this he found himself standing there at the same evening, needing to earn some money so that he at least could afford to buy something to eat and get a room somewhere.
This night Harry didn’t earns a pound. He was hungry and tired, and he was disappointed, but he knew that he probably looked more like a lost tourist with his suitcase than a guy who was offering himself for sex and so the night turned into day and Harry still had no money.
He then started walking around Kings Cross, asking people for their spare change or anything but no one seemed to like the idea of giving him anything and so Harry left the station behind and walked through the city. His feet were tired, his body aching and suddenly the teenager found himself sitting at a bench at Hyde Park. Tourists were walking around, taking pictures and laughing with each other.
Harrys heart ached when he thought back to the times where he himself had been a tourist in London. He had been to the city with both bis mother and Robin. They had visited a lot of places, had gone shopping and even had been on one of these funny Duck Tour that tourists like to do.
Now, a few years later, things had changed. A lot. Harry’s life had taken a turn he had never expected. He had always dreamed of himself studying and getting his degree before becoming a successful author, having his novels become movies, meeting the love of his life and living happily ever after with him but now everything was different.
Harry got some much-needed sleep at Hyde park and knew well enough that he needed a shower and that he had to get changed before going back to “work”. He hated admitting to himself that he was a prostitute, but Harry was determined to earn some money rather quick and so this as his only option.
He knew that he wouldn’t be able to get a job somewhere else anyway without having a place to stay at. This was like a vicious circle. He couldn’t get a job without having a place to stay at but also couldn’t find a place to stay at without having an income.
So, when Harry stretched his sore limbs and got up from where he had been lying in the grass it was sometime in the afternoon. The sun was shining, and it was a nice day in London. Luckily Harry still had his phone (apparently his mother still paid for it without even noticing) and so he quickly went online and looked for bathroom services in London. He found one that wasn’t too far away and so he made his way over there. It was a thirty-minute walk but without having money to buy a ticket walking was his only option anyway.
When Harry arrived, an elderly looking woman was sitting at the desk. She eyed him carefully, her eyes scanning him from head to toe.
“What can I do for you today, young man?” she questioned politely, and Harry knew that he had to be looking rough since she wasn’t sending him away. He hadn’t showered in two days and there had to be a small stubble on his face already, mixing with some dirt from lying down in the grass.
“I. I just need a shower,” he replied slowly, eyes fixed on the floor rather than looking at the woman. He didn’t want to see her judgmental stare.
“Bathrooms are down the hallway. Go ahead darling.”
Harry looked up and was surprised when he didn’t see disgust written all over her face but then realized that she probably got to see people who looked much worse than he did. Harry thanking her than hurried away. He rounded the counter and walked down the hallway. He quickly found one door that was unlocked and walked in, smiling when he saw that he was now inside of a rather big, single bathroom. He locked the door behind himself and that was the moment he let go off all the emotions he had bottled up inside of him.
He broke down right there, his belongings lying right next to him, Harry himself shaking against the door, knees pulled up to his chest. He started sobbing, the memories of what had happened rushing back to his mind.
He didn’t want to admit it, but he had been kidnapped, had been held against his will and had been forced to do things. He had been raped. Over and over again until he had decided that it’d hurt less if he accepted it and took part in the action and now he was actually looking to do this again. He was trying to make this his job. How fucked up was he?
Knowing that he couldn’t stay here forever, Harry got up after a few more moments and then stripped out of his clothes before getting into the shower, letting the warm water wash away all of the dirt.
An hour later he was back outside, feeling a lot better than he had before. He had put his dirty clothes back into his suitcase, putting on some fresh ones. Before walking out of the “homeless help” (Harry despised the name of it), he had asked Julia, the lady at the counter, if they had any bags where he could put his stuff in. The suitcase was too big for him anyway.
Julia had taken him to a storage room where a few bags had been lying around. She had explained that people sometimes gifted them with stuff that they didn’t need anymore. Harry had taken a small, black bag where he had put in all of his belonging and had left the suitcase behind for someone else to take it.
A little while later Harry was back at Kings Cross. It was already dark outside, and he quickly found a spot at the back of the building where men and women were standing around. Harry had to admit that they all looked quite sexy with their button-up blouses being left open, exposing their six packs or the ladies wearing skirts that were barely long enough to fit over their asses, putting their long legs perfectly on display.
Harry sighed when he realized that he wasn’t going to find a costumer here. He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, didn’t have anything on him that made him look sexy. He was about to pick up his things and leave when a man approached him.
“You’re trying to get fucked?” he questioned bluntly, getting straight to his point before continuing to talk. “I’m the boss here. I can promise you that you can earn some money. The only condition I have is that I want 50 percent of your income. In return I’m going to make sure that no one hurts you, that you get paid and that you get some other clothes. Do we have a deal here?”
Harry looked at the man, his mouth open in shock. Memories from David came rushing back to his head but even though he’d probably end of being tricked again he needed to do this. He needed to earn some money, needed to get his life back on track or otherwise he was screwed.
“Yes, I guess we have,” Harry mumbled his reply and the other man smiled at him.
“You can put your stuff into the van over there and put on a different shirt. There are some lying around and then you can go straight to work.”
Harry scrambled off and did what he had been told. By the end of the night he had earned 200 pounds, giving the other 200 to Max, as he had learned his name was, but he was okay with it. At least he had enough money to get a room now.
It was early in the morning, Harry was tired and in desperate need of a shower. Even though the men weren’t allowed to come inside of him and always wore condoms he still felt disgusted and like he reeked of sex. Harry quickly walked into this coffee shop near Westminster station and ordered a big cup of coffee and a muffin. It was his first real meal for two days ago and even though he knew that he should eat more he didn’t want to spend too much money right away. The smell inside the coffee shop however made Harry pick up a brownie and a sandwich as well and when he walked away from the counter, balancing the items he had bought in his hands, his eyes fell on the pinboard.
Looking for a flat mate, Single room to rent
The headline caught Harrys eye and when he walked closer he looked at the paper and read the text.
Four boys living near Green Park are looking for a flat mate. Big, furnished bedroom. Rent 350 pounds per month.
If interested, please contact Liam
Underneath the short text a phone number had been scribbled on the paper and Harry knew right away that he needed to call this guy.
Harry had called Liam on the same day, the other boy sending him pictures of the flat and the bedroom via WhatsApp, telling him a little bit more about himself and the other boys living there, and Harry had been excited. The room was rather big and the flat looked nice and tidy. The rent wasn’t too much for a place like this in the middle of London and so Harry had literally told Liam that he was going to move in on Saturday, the slightly older boy agreeing happily.
The following day Harry had stayed at a rather cheap hotel and had gone back to Kings Cross every single night. Max was always there and so were some other boys, but they were all friendly around each other and Max kept his promise, giving Harry 50 percent of what he had earned.
The costumers and the job were bad. The men being rough without leaving actual wounds but hurting Harry nevertheless and he threw up after nearly every costumer and even if he didn’t he always hurried away to brush his teeth at this dirty toilet right outside of Kings Cross.
Harry cried himself to sleep nearly every day, wishing for someone to get him out of this misery but no one was coming to save him. Harry had signed up for classes at university on the last possible day and had even managed to pay the tuition fee on time. University was starting in a week and Harry was determined to be the best student there, to work his arse off because he knew that this was probably his only chance.
**
Harry rested his head on the window of the train. It was early in the morning and he had worked all night, needing to earn some more money. He was determined to get back to his feet, to leave this job behind but right now he didn’t have enough money to do so.
He knew that things were about the get more complicated once classes started because he needed to study hard to make his dream come true. Maybe he would find himself another job now that he had a place to sleep.
Time passed rather quick and when Harry got off the train he felt nerves settle in. What if he didn’t get along with the people living there? What if they didn’t like him?
His mind was telling him to run, to go back to the hotel he had stayed at but deep-down Harry knew that he had to do this and so he made his way down the street like Liam had told him and then stopped at number 58.
It was a nice-looking house right in the middle of London. There were bus stops and even some shops around and it looked nice. Green Park was right across the street and Harry knew already that he was going to find himself studying outside rather often. He had always been someone who loved being outside and back home he had had this huge garden when he had stayed at for hours.
The teenager checked the time once again and noticed that he was five minutes early but rang the bell nevertheless. The door was being opened after a few moments and Harry walked up the stairs to the second floor like Liam had told him.
“Hi. You have to be Harry,” a tall, young man with brown hair said as he stood in the doorway. “I’m Liam, welcome home.”
“Harry,” the curly haired boy replied politely and shook Liam’s hand, feeling his nerves settle down a little bit.
“I’ll show you around really quick if that’s okay and then I’ll let you settle down. I have to go to work in a little while anyway,” Liam explained, and Harry only nodded his head, walking inside of the flat.
“It’s actually rather simple,” Liam explained as he looked down the hallway. “On the left side are all of the bedrooms. We have mine, Zayn’s, Niall’s, yours and Louis’. On the left is the bathroom, the living room and the kitchen.”
Liam had walked down a little bit until he and Harry were standing in front of Harry’s new bedroom. Once the door was being opened Harry was amazed by the room once again even though he had seen it before.
It was a simple but nice room. The bed was pushed against the wall, a small desk standing at the other side. There was a small cupboard and that was about it. The wall was painted in a light-yellow color, making the room feel warm.
Harry put his bags down and followed Liam back outside again, closing the door behind him.
“So here is the living room and the kitchen is right there. Louis is inside,” Liam once again explained and walked into the room, Harry following behind.
At first Harry only saw someone siting at the table, his back facing him. The boy had longer hair than Liam, but they were in a similar color.
When they walked into the room Louis turned around and Harry stopped dead in his tracks as he looked at Louis. He was beautiful. Everything about him made Harry’s heart beat faster. Louis had these beautiful blue eyes, brighter than the ocean, that held so many emotions.
Louis seemed to be just as amazed by Harry, staring straight back at him, eyes scanning Harry from head to toe.
Liam seemed to notice the tension in the room and chuckled before coughing slightly.
“Well okay so Louis this is Harry, Harry this is Louis,” he introduced both boys, but they were too busy eye fucking each other that neither of them seemed to listen to him.
“I think I heard someone at the door?” Niall questioned as he strode into the room, breaking the tension between Louis and Harry. “Hi, I’m Niall,” he quickly introduced himself and Harry shook his hand politely.
“Harry,” he replied then cleared his throat before looking around the room. Louis had turned his face back to his phone, his cheeks still flushed.
“Zayn is getting dressed I think. He should be here soon. Listen I really have to go to work now but I think you’re in good hands. I thought about ordering pizza tonight if that’s okay with you.”
NO! Harry wanted to scream. He had to go back to Kings Cross. He had to earn some money but then again, he figured that one day off wouldn’t hurt too bad. He had just met these boys and they all seemed to be quite nice and Harry was in desperate need of having a friend or two.
“Sounds nice,” he replied, and Liam once again smiled and patted his shoulder before walking out of the room.
“You want some coffee? Or anything to eat?” Niall questioned as Harry continued to stand in the doorway, looking unsure of what to do.
“Coffee sounds nice,” Harry replied, and Niall gestured for him to take a seat and so Harry slowly walked over to where Louis was sitting as well and sat down next to him.
Bright blue eyes looked up from their phone and once again their eyes met. Louis was smiling softly at Harry and Harry blushed slightly.
“So, let’s see if you fit in here,” the boy said after a few more moments as Niall sat down with two hot mugs of coffee and placed them on the table, Harry thanking him.
“Please tell me that you’re not some creep. We’ve had so many weird people living here. I still blame it on the room,” Niall said, making Louis roll his eyes.
“What he’s trying to say is that he’s happy that you’re here and that he’s hoping for the two of you to get along.”
“Well that what I’m hoping as well,” Harry answered truthfully. “Where are you coming from? You’re not British, are you?”
“Mullingar in Ireland,” Niall said proudly and grinned at him. “I moved here a few years ago. I work at a coffee shop around here and I’m trying to make it into music industry as a bassist but no such luck yet.”
“Where are you from, Harry?” Louis questioned, trying to be part of their conversation.
Harry shifted in his seat, not liking where this conversation was going. He had of course figured out that the boys were going to ask questions about his personal life, but he simply didn’t want them to know too much.
“I grew up in Holmes Chapel, Cheshire,” he replied quietly and thanked god as the other boy walked into the kitchen right then.
“Hey, I’m Zayn,” he introduced himself and then looked at Louis and Niall. “Lads we should get going.”
Harry looked a little bit confused and took another sip of his coffee while Niall started to explain things to him.
“We’re going over to Westfield’s. Zayn works there on Saturdays and Louis and I are in need of some clothes. You can join us if you want to.”
“No thanks. I was up all night and I’d like to get settled down if that’s okay with you.”
“Of course. You live here now so make yourself a home. We’ll be back later, okay?” Louis said before Niall even had a chance to speak up.
A few moments later Harry was left alone. Once he heard the door being shut he let go of all the emotions he had successfully bottled up inside of him, breaking down right in the middle of the kitchen. For the first time in months he now had a place that he could call his home.
All those weeks Harry had tried to be strong, had tried to find a way out of his misery. He hadn’t allowed himself to break down whilst living with David, hadn’t allowed for anyone to see what was happening inside of him but new that he was alone and somewhere safe for the first time in weeks, Harry let go.
He cried as if his brain was being shredded from the inside. Emotional pain flowed out of his every pore. From his mouth came a cry so raw that even the eyes of the devil himself would probably become wet with tears.
Harry grabbed onto a chair so that his violent shaking wouldn’t cause him to fall and from his eyes came a thicker flow of tears than he had cried when his mother had abandoned him.
The world turned into a bout and so did all the sound. Everything was just gone. Harry’s floodgates had opened. His chin trembled as if he was a small child and his breathing was heavier than ever before. He was gasping for air that simply wasn’t there.
Harrys mind was so far away, his entire body shaking with sobs. He didn’t hear someone unlocking the door to the flat, didn’t hear Louis walk into the room. He didn’t hear him starting to speak and then raise his voice when he noticed Harry breaking down.
**
Louis, Niall and Zayn had made their way downstairs and were walking to Zayn’s car that was parked a little bit further down the street when Louis reached around into the back pocket of his jeans and cursed loudly.
“Fuck I forgot my wallet.”
“I’ll pay, and you pay me back later,” Niall quickly suggested by Louis shook his head no.
“There is this gift card inside that I got from Mrs. Jenkins for helping her with her groceries. I really wanted to spend it today. I’ll be right back,” Louis explained and then turned around, jogging back to their apartment-complex.
“At least I’m sitting in the front today,” Niall replied cheekily as he got into the car right next to Zayn who was already busy plugging in his phone, looking for a nice playlist.
*
Louis wasted no time waiting for the elevator and took the stairs, two each time. He unlocked the door and walked inside.
“It’s me,” he yelled. “I just forgot my wallet.”
As Louis was about to move forward he stopped dead in his tracks when he heard these strange sounds coming from the kitchen. It sounded like someone was choking.
“Harry?” he questioned as he waked over to the kitchen only to stop dead in his tracks when he saw what was happening right here.
Harry sobbing, choking on his sobs. His entire body was shaking. He was holding onto the chair so hard that his knuckles had turned white whilst has other hand was pressed against his chest.
The sounds that escaped Harry’s lips let a shiver run up Louis spine. Not once in his life had he heard someone cry like that and he didn’t need to be a doctor to know that Harry was hurting. Something horrible must’ve happened in his life to make him break down like this and Louis’ heart ached.
“Harry what’s wrong?” the older boy asked as he walked over to where Harry was doubling over, placing his hand onto his back in a comforting way.
Harry recoiled at first, his red-rimmed eyes shooting up only to meet bright blue ones. Bright blue like the sky. Those eyes that held nothing but worry. No judgement, no pity, just worry.
“It’s just me,” Louis said softly as he watched Harry struggle to figure things out. “It’s Louis.”
Harry nodded his head slowly, silently telling Louis that he recognized him.
“Take a deep breath for me, okay. In and out. In and out.”
Harry was struggling at first, his breathing way too fast but then he felt his hand being grabbed and being placed on Louis’ chest, the older boy trying to get him to match their breathing.
Harry closed his eyes and let Louis guide him down onto the floor, holding onto him like his life depended on it. Suddenly things felt alright again. He felt safe in Louis’ arms, felt safe as the other boy pulled him into a tight embrace and rubbed his hand up and down his back whilst whispering soft words to him.
“It’s okay. You’re alright. Breathe with me. You’re so strong, Harry. It’s alright!”
Even though both boys had met not even an hour ago they could feel the tension in the room and Louis knew instantly that he wanted to help Harry. Wanted him to get better, wanted him to fight his demons, to win the fights he was battling against. Having Harry in his arms felt so right and no matter what Louis wanted him to smile again.
Harry had no idea how long he had been sitting there, in Louis’ arms, trying to put himself back together but after a little while he felt embarrassed for breaking down like that. He pulled away from Louis who was looking at him concerned.
“Thank you,” he mumbled as a blush crept on his cheeks.
“Are you feeling better now?”
“Yes, thank you,” he replied, honesty in his voice. “Listen I... I’m. I’m sorry.”
Before Louis even had a chance to answer, someone was walking into the room and when he looked up he saw Zayn and Niall standing in the doorway, their anger quickly replaced by irritation.
“Louis we’re waiting,” Zayn said before looking at the scene in front of him. “Are you boys okay?”
Another blush decorated Harry’s cheeks as he looked at the floor, not daring to look anyone in the eye. It was Louis who spoke up and explained things.
“Harry was having some trouble getting used to all this. Had a little panic attack right here. He’s okay now though.”
“Maybe you should come with us to get your mind of things? I know how scary things like this can be,” Zayn offered softly, smiling slightly at Harry who figured out that they were probably right.
“Let’s go then,” Louis said as he got up and reached for Harry, offering his hand.
He felt electricity run through his body as Harry took his hand and slowly got up as well.
“Let’s go now lads,” Niall told them before he checked the time and followed his friends back to the car.
**
Harry, Niall and Louis spent the day at Westfields shopping center, having an absolute blast. Both boys had quickly noticed that Harry fitted perfectly to them and Niall had referred to him as the missing piece already.
They got along pretty well, laughed a lot and even had some banter going around like they’d known each other for years.
With the boys being around Harry felt himself start to relax. He was still embarrassed about them finding out about his panic attack and Louis even witnessing it but what amazed Harry the most was that they didn’t judge him. Neither of them had asked him about it and they also hadn’t asked questions about his personal life so far.
Niall and Louis had bought a lot of clothes, Harry sharing his opinion on everything they tried on. Harry himself had seen some pretty nice things but hadn’t bought anything not wanting to spend too much money on stuff. Money was tight, and he definitely didn’t need it to be even tighter. He wanted to be able to pay his rent on time and to buy groceries and stuff like that and so he had decided to save some money up first before spending anything.
Time seemed to pass rather quick because suddenly Zayn was back with them, being done with his shift at the Nike Store already.
“Wow that was so much fun today,” Niall smiled as they got back to the car. “Welcome home, Harry!”
Harry only smiled back at the Irish boy who had no idea how much these words actually meant to the curly haired boy.
**
Later that night all five boys were sitting in the living room, boxes filled with Chinese food standing in front of them. When Liam had come hone he had been devastated when he had found out that their favorite place to order pizza from, had shut down and so they had gone for ordering Chinese instead.
Harry was sitting on the couch, completely relaxed, eating his noodles. He had insisted on paying for their food and even though he now had barely any money life, he didn’t worry about it right now.
“So, it’s question time now, huh?” Liam spoke up and Harry tensed a little bit. He could feel all pairs of eyes on him and instantly felt nervous. He had of course thought about what he was going to tell the others without giving away what was really going on or what he was actually doing for a living.
“Okay. What do you want to know?”
“I think I’ll just start by telling you something about myself first,” Liam suggested, and Harry was absolutely okay with this.
“So, I’m Liam,” the older boy chuckled. “I’ve turned twenty-one a few weeks ago. I’m from Doncaster, have wo older sisters. I’m studying to become a doctor. I like having this place tidy and comfortable, love having a quiet night in from time to time but also don’t say no to going out or playing FIFA. That’s probably it.”
Harry smiled, instantly liking Liam even more. Something about him made him feel like he was probably the most responsible person in this group. Maybe it was because of the face that he was studying to become a doctor or maybe he simply took things more seriously.
“I’ll go next,” Niall announced even though it was hard to understand him, his mouth stuffed with Chinese food.
“Would you mind swallowing first?” Zayn said with disgust as the Irish boy grinned back at him, pieces of food falling into his lap.
The atmosphere in the room shifted and suddenly everyone was laughing looking at the blond boy.
“Okay, okay, sorry,” Niall giggled after he had swallowed all of the food He quickly wiped his eyes where a few tears had formed upon laughing too hard.
“I’m Niall but people call me Nialler as well. I’m from Mullingar in Ireland and moved here two years ago. I work at this coffee shop around the corner twice a week and study to become a computer programmer. I have an older brother and him and the rest of my family are all living in Ireland.”
“Oh, and I love to ear, obviously.” He added and laughed loudly.
“And he’s always loud, funny and very outgoing.”
“I noticed,” Harry replied making the other boys chuckle.
He still didn’t dare to speak up, not wanting to talk about himself but Zayn cut in anyways.
“Okay so I’m Zayn, I’m twenty-one and I’m from Bradford. I moved here about a year ago and literally fell in love with these lads right here. I study to become teacher. I have one older and two younger sisters but they’re either living in Manchester or still in Doncaster.”
The room wasn’t quiet for long since Louis didn’t waste a second before he spoke up.
“I’m Louis,” he introduced himself once more, his blue eyes fixed on Harry who tried to hold back every urge to walk over and kiss the older boy.
“I’m turning 22 in a few weeks. I’m from Doncaster as well. I have six younger siblings but only one of them is a boy. I call my mum every day to talk to her because I miss her terribly and whenever I find the time to, I go home and visit her. I’m studying to become a teacher as well.”
Harry had nearly zoned out, barely listening to what Louis was telling him, his eyes fixed on the older boys’ lips. Louis looked so soft and cuddly and Harry wanted nothing more than to kiss him and maybe even do more things with him.
“So, what about you then?”
Harry tensed slightly, put his plate aside and continued to look at the carpet instead of meeting the boys’ eyes. He quickly tried to remember what he had planned to say and then spoke up. He was talking quietly, and so no other sound was being made by anyone.
“I’m Harry. I’m turning 19 in February. I grew up in Holmes Chapel with my parents. I don’t have any siblings. I want to become a writer and I’m starting University on Monday. I work as a cook at a restaurant during the night and that’s about it.”
Harry had thought long and hard about what to tell the boys since he’d leave the flat sometime in the evening and come back in the middle of the night or early in the morning. He had thought about telling them that he was working in some night club, but it was too risky because what if they decided to go there one day? He had gone with his cover of being a cook because no one could visit him there and if they ever asked where he was working he could quickly tell them a place of an expensive restaurant in the middle of London where they wouldn’t eat dinner anyway.
“So, we can expect you to cook for us then?” Zayn asked with a smile and Harry only nodded his head.
Since his mother and stepdad had decided to ignore him he had taken care of himself and this had also meant getting himself something to eat. Harry had started cooking and had soon found it that it was relaxing to him. He was quite okay but probably still better than the other boys in the flat and so he wasn’t too worried about having to cook from time to time.
“Sure, that’s not a problem,” Harry replied and then turned back to his food, silently thanking the lord that the boys seemed to be satisfied with his introduction.
When Harry got back to his room later that night he sat down on the bed and took a deep breath. For the first time weeks, years actually, he felt like he was home, felt like he belonged somewhere, and this definitely was the nicest feeling in the world, making the curly haired boy fall asleep with a smile on his face.
**
Weeks passed by and Harry found it harder and harder to keep up with his “job” and University. He sometimes had classes in the morning but went to work the night before and so there were days where he didn’t even catch some sleep at all.
He had had to put up his working schedule in the flat like the other boys had done so that they always knew who was going to be home for dinner and who was working. Harry was now officially working every second weekend and either five or three times during the week.
Sometimes the boys would ask him questions about work, but Harry always managed to answer their questions, hoping to keep them from finding out that he was only lying to them.
One-night Harry was sitting on the couch in the living room, trying to keep his eyes open. He still had to read three chapters of this book before tomorrow, but it seemed like an impossible task.
“Hey Haz,” Niall said as he walked into the room but stopped when he looked at Harry.
The curly haired boy looked tired. He looked like he hadn’t slept in day and Niall wasn’t sure if that was even a lie.
Harry was running himself ragged. He tried to keep up with Uni but also had this job as a cook in this fancy restaurant he had yet to tell them the name of. Niall and the other boys had quickly found out that Harry was a private guy. He didn’t talk much about his personal life and so they didn’t question him about it.
He was funny and always made sure that everyone around him was okay. They all loved it when he cooked for all of them or prepared breakfast.
Louis was probably the person who Harry liked the most. No matter what Louis always knew what the curly haired boy needed. He knew when to ask him what was going on but also knew when to offer a hug. Louis had fallen for Harry, they all could tell. He was amazed by the younger boy and couldn’t stop staring at him and sometimes Zayn would tease him about it.
The other boys had tried to get Louis to talk to Harry about his feeling or to take the younger boy out for dinner, but Louis wasn’t having any of this. He wasn’t going to make a fool of himself.
Things like that needed time and Louis was willing to wait forever for Harry to start developing feelings for him.
**
It was a rainy Friday evening in the middle of December when all five boys were having dinner. Niall had ordered pizza since Harry had had a lot of classes and had gotten home past six o’clock. He knew that Harry was too tired to prepare dinner for them and so he had ordered pizza instead.
“So, lads,” Zayn started to say, taking another slice of pizza and chewing it in between speaking. “What are your plans for Christmas this year?”
Harry tensed instantly but quickly tried to cover up, not allowing himself to break down.
This year was going to be the first Christmas he’d celebrate alone, without his mother being around.
Even though his parents hadn’t cared about him last year he had been home at least. He hadn’t gotten a single present, hadn’t had his mother wish him merry Christmas or give him a hug and of course there hadn’t been or tree or anything like that.
They year before Harry had cried until no more tears would come and he was quite sure that this year was going to be just the same.
“I’m flying home to Ireland,” Niall announced happily, half of his pizza already eaten while Liam was at his second slice.
“I guess we’re all going home, right?”
All boys nodded in agreement and Zayn turned to look at Harry.
“What about you, Haz?”
“I. I.,” the curly haired boy stuttered, his face turning bright red. “Mum and dad are on a world tour at the moment and they don’t know where they’re going to be on Christmas, so we decided to celebrate once they’re back.”
“But you can’t stay here on your own!” Louis exclaimed .
“It’s fine, really,” Harry shrugged not wanting to get too worked up over this topic.
“No, it’s not. Listen you’re coming home with me,” Louis said, and Harry’s eyes grew wide.
“What? Oh no, no it’s fine,” he replied even though he loved the idea of spending Christmas with Louis, but he didn’t want to intertwine, knowing that Christmas was for families.
“Well no, it’s not and I’m not taking no as an answer. We’re leaving on the 23rd so you better be ready by then!”
And so, it happened that exactly eight days later Harry, Louis and Liam were on their way to Doncaster.
**
“Oh, my baby boy,” Johannah said as she stood on the platform of the railway station in Manchester, Karen, Liam’s mother standing right next to her.
Both Liam and Louis let their mothers hug them, hugged them back and placed soft kisses on their cheeks.
Harry was standing a little bit behind, looking at the scene with tears in his eyes. He longed for his mother to do this, longed for her touch, her love but he knew that he had ruined it.
As he stood there awkwardly, right next to their suitcases, he realized that there was no going back for him. He thought about home, thought about his mother sitting in her house with Robin, having a lovely Christmas together, not even thinking about Harry and it hurt, it really did.
“You have to be Harry, right?” a female voice pulled him out of his thoughts and when he looked up he saw Johannah looking at him.
“I’m Johannah but you can call me Jay,” she introduced himself and before Harry had a chance to reply she walked over to him and pulled him into a long embrace.
Harry quickly wrapped his arms around the older woman, melting into the touch.
“Mum let the boy breathe,” Louis said from where he was standing, and Jay pulled away chuckling.
“I’m sorry poppet.”
After that Karen pulled Harry into a tight embrace as well and then both families parted ways since Karen and Liam had to pick up Liam’s sister as well.
Louis, Harry and Jay left the railway station and walked over to big car.
“The girls are looking forward to see you,” Jay told her oldest son as she started to drive.
**
Over the next hour Harry learned a lot of things about Louis and his family and even though he was still nervous and felt like an intruder he now found it a little bit easier. Jay was such a nice, lovely lady and she had literally told Harry a hundred times already that she was happy to finally meet him and that he just had to tell her if the girls were too loud since they could be quite a handful.
Once they pulled into the driveway of this house in Doncaster Harry instantly felt amazed. The house was big, even bigger than he had imagined. It looked quiet on his outside, but Harry was quite sure that it could be very loud on the inside with all these people living there.
“Are you okay, love?” Louis questioned once they got out of the car and walked over to the door. “Mum loves you already.”
“She’s lovely,” Harry replied and smiled when Louis wrapped his arm around the younger boys’ waist.
“Let’s go now. Just tell me if they’re too much,” he chuckled, and Harry knew exactly why he had said that when Jay unlocked the door.
There was this choir of people screaming “Mummy” and “Louis” and footsteps coming closer when all of a sudden, a bunch of people rounded the corner and stood in the hallway.
The tiniest kids, Ernest and Doris, wobbled over and crashed into their mothers’ legs. Doris had red hair like no one else in the family and Ernest’ hair was light blonde, lighter than Louis’.
The next pair of twins, Phoebe and Daisy, as Harry had learned, were ten years old. Harry didn’t know which one Phoebe was, and which one was Daisy, but they quickly wrapped their small arms around Louis’, pulling him close.
“I guess you’re Harry,” a brown-haired teenage girl, Fizzy, Harry remembered, walked over and smiled at him.
Harry had to admit that she was beautiful and that she looked exactly like Johannah. She was fourteen years old but looked older than that.
Lottie, the only girl that was left, walked over as well and greeted Harry. She was older yet shorter than Fizzy and had blonde hair.
“Okay babies this is Harry, he’s a friend of Louis and he’s going to stay with us over Christmas,” Johannah explained and Harry greeted everyone then.
“Let’s bring our bags upstairs,” Louis said after a few more moments and Harry silently thanked him. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Louis’ family, they actually seemed to be such nice people, but he had yet to wrap his head around the fact that he was going to celebrate Christmas with strangers.
*
“I can tell that they really like you,” Louis said once he and Harry walked into their room later that day. They had put the babies and the twins to bed just before and were now tired as well.
“I like them a lot, they’re all so friendly,” Harry replied and made his way over to the couch where he was going to sleep during their stay.
Louis room looked exactly like the room of any teenager and he was sure that Johannah hadn’t changed a thing since Louis had moved out years ago. Some old posters were still hanging on the walls and Harry chuckled when he saw posters of Vanessa Hudgens and Victoria Beckham.
“Interesting taste in women,” he said while Louis only blushed.
“Well I don’t even know why they’re up here. I’m not into them anyway but apparently I thought that they’d look nice on my wall,” the older boy shrugged. “I’m going to have a shower now if that’s okay. Just make yourself a home.”
Once Louis had disappeared into the bathroom Harry decided to get himself something to drink and walked downstairs.
It wasn’t that late, the clock reading 9.23 p.m. but the house was quiet already. The twins were asleep and Fizzy, and Lottie had gone to their rooms as well. There was light inside of the kitchen and when Harry walked in Johannah looked up from where he was mixing some ingredients together at the moment. There was a man leaning against the counter as well, holding a beer bottle in his hand.
“Oh, hey Harry,” Jay greeted and then moved her hand to point at the man. “You haven’t met. This is Dan, my husband. Dan, this is Harry a friend of Louis.”
“It’s a pleasure meeting you,” Harry said politely, and Dan smiled back at him.
“Nice meeting you as well.”
“What are you doing?” Harry questioned as he took a closer look at the bowl.
“It’s Louis’ birthday tomorrow and it’s a tradition that I make his favorite cake,” Jay replied while Harry’s mouth opened in shock.
“His birthday? He hasn’t said a thing about this. I don’t have a present for him.”
Jay and Dan smiled softly at the younger boy and shook their heads.
“Don’t worry about this. I’m sure that he’s really happy that you’re here and doesn’t want any presents. Now, what did you need, love?”
**
Harry woke up quite early on the next morning. It took him a moment to remember where he was and when he looked over to the bed he saw Louis still sleeping peacefully. He was snoring softly, and Harry slowly got out of bed, stretched his sore limbs and shuffled over to Louis’ bed.
It was a little bit chilly in the room and since he was wearing nothing but boxers and a shirt, Harry slipped into the covers of Louis’ bed, snuggling closer to the older boy.
At first Louis didn’t react but a few moments later he stirred and turned around. Cracking his eyes open he came face to face with Harry, who smiled cheekily at him.
“Now that’s something nice to wake up to,” he rasped out, his voice still thick with sleep. “What are you doing here?”
“I just wanted to cuddle. I can leave if you want,” Harry quickly said and was about to get up again, but Louis held him down, running his hand through Harry’s soft curls.
“Stay with me,” he whispered, and Harry felt his cheeks flush.
“Happy birthday to you!” he simply said, and Louis wrapped his arms around the younger boy, kissing him on the forehead.
“I don’t know how you found out about this but thank you!”
“I’ll get you a present once we’re back in London. You should’ve told me!”
“Shush now, go back to sleep it’s too early,” Louis replied, and Harry nodded his head, before closing his eyes.
He fell asleep in Louis’ arms, feeling happy and safe and for the first time in months Harry wished that he could talk to someone about his problems, that he could tell Louis what was really going on but then again, he found it impossible to do so. How do you start a conversation like this? What do you say to someone? Oh hey, I lied to you by the way, I work as a prostitute and my family abandoned me? No, he couldn’t tell Louis. Not yet. Not now, maybe never.
*
“Louis, Harry, do you boys mind taking the kids out for the afternoon so that I can put up the tree and wrap up the presents?” Johannah asked the boys right after lunch as they helped her with the dishes.
“Sure, that’s no problem,” Louis replied, and Harry nodded his head in agreement and so it happened that only an hour later Louis and Harry went outside with the kids.
Doris and Ernest clung to Louis while Harry was walking with Phoebe and Daisy. Fizzy and Lottie were walking along with them, but it was quite noticeable that they weren’t too interested in their family at the moment, probably having a very serious conversation about some boys.
“Boo I’m tired,” Doris whined after a little while and Harry turned around to grin at Louis who was turning bright red.
“Boo?” he questioned and chuckled.
“Mummy still calls him Boo,” Phoebe explained, and Louis felt his cheeks flush even more. There was no necessity of Harry knowing his nickname.
“Let’s head to the café and get some hot chocolate then,” Louis simply said, ignoring Harry’s smile.
“Can I sit next to you, Harry?” Daisy, one of the twins, asked once they reached the café.
It was quiet and only a few people were there, so they didn’t have a problem finding a place to sit.
“Sure, love come here.”
“I like you Harry,” Daisy replied and snuggled closer to Harry who wrapped his arm around the younger girl.
Louis was looking at them from across the table, a soft smile on his lips. Doris was sitting on his lap, thumb stuck in her mouth, her eyes falling close already.
“I like you too, love!”
Ernest was fussing around a little bit, not wanting to sit down. He got up from his seat and walked around the table, whining a little up.
“Up,” he claimed as he stood next to Harry, his chubby hands resting on his legs.
“Come here babe,” Harry cooed and picked the toddler up, placing him in his lap.
After a few more minutes their drinks arrived, and Ernest and Doris were already fast asleep.
“He’s usually a lot more complicated when it comes to strangers,” Louis said quite impressed by how well Harry was with kids. It made his heart beat even faster.
“I guess I’m a natural than. People just like me,” Harry replied and chuckled.
“I guess you’re right,” Louis replied and smiled wide at him.
Lottie and Fizzy were snickering right next to them while Daisy simply asked what everyone wanted to know so desperately.
“Are you Louis’ boyfriend?”
Both Harry and Louis turned bright red at the question and while Harry simply looked down Louis looked a little bit shocked at his sister.
“Where did you learn that from?”
“Lottie was talking to Fizzy the other day. She said that if you like someone you call them your boyfriend or girlfriend and I know that you don’t like girls, so Harry has to be your boyfriend then, right? Because you like him?”
“Well I do like girls just not in the romantic way and even if you like someone you’re not automatically their boyfriend. You said before that you like Harry as, well right? He’s not your boyfriend then and he’s not mine as well.”
“But do you want him to be?”
For a moment time seemed to stand still and Louis looked at Harry, bright blue eyes staring into beautiful green ones.
“Very much so, yes!”
**
Ever since Louis’ love confession things were a little bit awkward between Harry and Louis. Harry had wanted to jump into Louis’ arms and kiss him right in the middle of the café, but he knew that it wouldn’t be fair to the older boy.
Louis deserved to find a lover who was willing to die for him (Harry actually was) and someone who didn’t have a fucked-up life like he had.
How could he be together with Louis when he’d practically cheat on him a few times a week? He didn’t have a feeling for the men he was with every night, but he still had sex with them, gave them blowjobs and let himself be fucked by them so no, it wouldn’t be fair.
It happened later that day, when Harry and Louis were back upstairs in the bedroom, scrolling through their phones, when Louis got up and walked over the where Harry was sitting in the couch.
“Hey Haz,” he said softly and sat down, the younger boy looking up at him, putting his phone away.
“Yes?”
“I’m sorry about what I said earlier today. I didn’t want to freak you out, but I honestly meant every word I said. I like you a lot, Harry Styles.”
Harrys heart started beating faster, his palms becoming sweaty and he once again had to fight the urge to throw himself at Louis and kiss him. He was staring at Louis, not a single word coming out of his mouth because what was he supposed to say?
Louis noticed his hesitation and sighed.
“I get it, okay. It’s fine but I hope that this doesn’t change things between the two of us,” he told the younger boy before he got up and walked out of the room, leaving a speechless Harry behind.
“Stupid, stupid, stupid,” Harry said to himself as he stared at the door, Louis had just vanished through.
Taking a few deep breaths, Harry put the blanket away and hurried out of the room as well, making his way downstairs.
It was quiet in the kitchen and so he made his way over to the living room. Johannah and Dan were snuggling on the couch, watching some old movie, two glasses of wine standing on the table in front of them.
They looked so in love and their eyes moved to Harry once he stepped into the room.
“He went outside,” Jay explained with a soft smile while Harry just nodded his head.
Harry was so amazed by how relaxed Jay and Dan were with the situation of Louis’ being gay. They simply didn’t seem to be bothered in the slightest, accepting their son and supporting him through everything.
Harry tried to imagine his parents being like that, tried to imagine how different his life could be right now. He would probably still attend University in London, but things would be so much easier with him not having to worry about money. If circumstances were different he’d probably sit inside of his childhood home right now, drinking some tea with his parents, talking about everything that had happed over the last couple of weeks but instead he was here with Louis and his family.
He was so grateful for the opportunity to spend Christmas with someone else instead of being alone and for the fact that the Tomlinsons’ had accepted him like a son/brother and so Harry knew that he had to make things right with Louis because otherwise he’d probably risk ruining his friendship with the older boy.
Harry shuffled over to the hallway and quickly put on his shoes and his coat before opening the door.
It was 9.30 in the evening. It was dark outside, the only light coming from the streetlamp and some Christmas decoration that had been put up on the windows. Louis was standing a few feet away, staring at the stars in the sky, not acknowledging Harry in the slightest.
The curly haired boy walked over to him, stood beside him and did the same. The stars were shining bright, some brighter than others and it was such a beautiful atmosphere.
“I always used to say that the brightest star on the sky is the one for your loved ones that are no longer with us,” Louis explained before turning his face away and looking at Harry who did just the same.
Louis’ features were soft, no sight of anger on them but Harry could see that he was sad. His eyes weren’t as bright as usual, and Harry hated to know that he was the reason for this.
“Louis look,” he started to speak, looking back into the sky. “I like you too.”
“I like you so much that it sometimes hurts but Louis, I just can’t be with you. It wouldn’t be fair to you.”
“And what exactly is that supposed to mean?”
“I can’t really explain but I just want you to know that this has nothing to do with you, okay. Being with you wouldn’t be fair to you and I don’t want to hurt you.”
For a moment Louis didn’t reply and just kept looking at Harry, his eyes wandering to Harry’s soft lips and then he slowly closed the distance between the two of them, one hand going around Harry’s waist, the other one resting on his cheek.
Louis knew that Harry didn’t love him back the way he did love Harry, but he couldn’t resist. He leaned in a little closer, their foreheads touching. Dear god, he couldn’t fight against the thoughts that were going through him.
His smell was flooding his senses now. Harry smelt soft, like baby powder and also like home.
Louis held Harry gently, cupping his face with one hand. He leaned in and softly. His lips brushed Harry’s. Not innocently like a tease but hot, fiery, passionate and demanding.
Harry wanted to pull away before he lost himself, but he couldn’t seem to. In this moment his sensed had been seduced and he couldn’t think straight. The world fell away.
Louis’ hand rested below his ear, his thumb caressing his cheek and their breaths mingled.
Harry could feel Louis’ soft, warm lips on him and before he had time to react Louis’ pressed his tongue to the seam of his lips and delved inside of his mouth.
It was a sloppy kiss, but Harry felt himself go with it completely. His arms reached up and tangled around Louis’ neck.
When they broke apart for air, Louis was smirking, and Harry smiled back at him before going in for a second kiss. Louis’ mouth was so warm, the caress of his lips soft and when they opened their mouths again to let their tongues dance with each other a low moan escaped Harry.
Sparks flew in every direction and the world was slowly disappearing around them, along with all the worries and problems. Louis made Harry feel like nothing else mattered.
The second kiss was different. It was a lot softer. Intimate and electrifying. Their lips were moving in perfect sync, Louis hands feeling Harry’s waist. The older boy pulled closer, the kiss becoming even more deeper, more passionate.
Harry played with the ends of Louis’ hair on his neck and never wanted to let go. He wanted to take this to the bedroom, to kiss Louis and make love to him but he knew that he couldn’t. Slowly his senses came back to him and he pulled away.
He couldn’t stop the tear that ran down his face, couldn’t stop himself from crying.
“I can’t be with you, Louis. It wouldn’t be fair to you. I need you to understand that this has nothing to do with you. You are perfect but I. I just can’t and I’m sorry!” Harry nearly sobbed before he made his way back into the house, leaving Louis standing outside on his own.
*
Over the next few days things were awkward between Louis and Harry, both boys pretending that nothing had happened even though they both couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss.
Harry was quite happy when they got back to London right after New Years’. Spending time with Louis’ family had been amazing and Harry had had the chance to celebrate Christmas again after two years without celebrating at all.
He had gotten some presents as well and things had been great.
Now they were all back in London and it was like reality had hit Harry hard. He knew that he needed to go to “work”. He was in desperate need of some money, but term break was close and so were exams.
Harry desperately needed to study because he couldn’t allow himself to fail.
“Lads I’m off to work,” he simply said one night, having mastered to say this lie without acting different in the slightest over the last couple of months.
“Have a good one!” Niall replied, and Harry smiled back at the boy before he headed out into the cold winter night.
The drive to Kings Cross was rather short and soon Harry found himself standing at his usual spot, Max greeting him at the car.
“You’re back?” he casually asked while Harry put his clothes away and changed into different ones. Ones that looked sexier on him.
He was wearing tight, black skinny jeans that fitted perfectly around his ass and a button-up blouse. He put a blazer on as well since it was rather cold.
“Yeah,” Harry simply answered not wanting to have a conversation with Max.
“Good then go to work!”
*
This night Harry had met a new costumer. He had introduced himself as Peter and Harry had told him the prices before he had gotten into the car. Peter was driving a fancy car, a black Range Rover that smelled like cigarettes but looked nice on the inside.
He had to be somewhere in his late-thirty’s or early-forties and didn’t talk much. They drove for about ten minutes until they reached some kind of hotel and walked inside together.
“Alright so let’s do this,” the man simply told Harry whose heart was beating rapidly against his chest, like always.
He figured that he’d never get used to this.
*
Nearly four hours later Harry got back to Kings Cross, Peter dropping him off like usual. Harry stumbled out of the car, his entire body hurting, while Max took care of the money.
“Styles come here!” Max suddenly yelled, and Harry quickly turned around and walked back when he saw Peter and Max talking right next to the car.
“You apparently earned this today. This is your tip,” Max explained as he handed Harry 100 pounds, the curly haired boy staring at the money in utter disbelief.
“Such a nice boy. I hope I’ll see you around here again!”
“Thank you so much, Sir!”
From that day on Peter became Harry’s best costumer. He came by at least three times a week and always left Harry and generous tip. Max kept his word and handed Harry half of the money he earned from his job, obviously having a lot of respect for Peter and Harry didn’t mind.
He was running himself ragged again, not wanting to miss out on Peter stopping by or him finding someone else and so Harry worked every night. He studied in the mornings, between classes or sometimes in the afternoon and tried to keep up with his life but things seemed to be impossible.
It happened one week before his final exam when everything came crashing down around Harry.
**
It was a typical Friday night in London and all five boys had gone out to celebrate Harrys upcoming birthday on Sunday.
They were sitting in this nice bar in the middle of London, having a laugh, drinking some beer.
“I can’t believe you’re only turning nineteen!”
“Niall, you’re not much older,” Harry argued but his words fell on deaf ears.
The boys were having such a good time and for once Harry didn’t think about anything else and just enjoyed the moment until he saw someone he hadn’t wished to see here in the slightest.
“Oh, Harry it’s nice to see you here,” a man in his forties suddenly said as approached their table.
Harry’s body tensed instantly. This wasn’t supposed to happen. No one was supposed to find out, but things were about to go downhill, Harry could tell.
“Oh, hi Peter,” he replied, voice shaking, feeling the looks of the other boys on him. “I’m just here with my friends.”
“That’s great. Listen I didn’t want to disturb you but then I saw all your beautiful friends here and I was wondering if you guys were up for a gang-bang.”
Niall nearly choked on his drink, beer coming out of his mouth while Louis looked furious. Liam’s mouth was wide open in shock and Zayn simply looked really mad.
“What the actual fuck?!” the hissed, about to get up and step closer to this guy.
“Oh,” Peter suddenly chuckled, eyes locking with Harry whose face had turning bright red with embarrassment. “You guys obviously don’t know that Harry here is a whore? I swear he gives the best blow jobs. Such a good little bitch!”
Now all eyes were fixed on Harry, who was looking down at his lap, playing with the sleeves of his sweater.
“Harry, what is he talking about?” Liam questioned after a few more moments of silence, a shocking idea popping up in his mind.
“He’s a freaking prostitute. Stands near Kings Cross at least five times a week waiting eager for someone to fuck him!”
“That’s bullshit!” Louis growled, glaring at the older man. He had to be lying.
Before anyone even had the chance to say something Harry bolted from his seat and ran out of the bar.
“HARRY!” all boys yelled in union.
“Guess you just got your answer then,” the man, Peter, chuckled before he walked away, leaving four speechless boys behind.
“I can’t believe this,” Niall whispered, eyes still wide.
“Let’s see if he wants home,” Liam suggested as he followed the other boys outside after putting some bills on their table, paying for their drinks.
“I still don’t understand,” Zayn mumbled as the boys got on the tube a few minutes later.
“We have to let him explain at first.”
“Why didn’t he tell us? I mean we’ve been living together for a for months now,” Louis shrugged his shoulders, his heart feeling heavy.
Suddenly a lot of things made sense to him. How Harry would sometimes flinch when someone startled him, how he kept complaining about having to go to work, how he had to work longer at least three times a week. And of course, why he couldn’t be with Louis. The curly haired boys’ words still stuck in Louis’ head.
I can’t be with you, Louis. It wouldn’t be fair to you. I need you to understand that this has nothing to do with you. You are perfect but I. I just can’t and I’m sorry!
**
Once the boys arrived at their flat they wasted no time, quickly walking over to Harry’s room, breathing out in relief when they heard shuffling behind the closed door. At least Harry was home.
Zayn didn’t bother to knock on the door, simply opening it. He needed answers, now!
Their mouths dropped open in shock when they looked at Harry who was busy throwing clothes into a bag.
Upon hearing the boys walk into his room Harry stopped in his actions, taking a deep breath before looking the other boys into the eyes.
He was confused when he found nothing but worry written over their faces. They had to be disgusted by him, right? After all they had just found out that their roommate was actually a whore, selling his body to other people in order to earn some money.
A single tear made its way down Harry’s cheek and he quickly wiped it away before his green eyes met Louis’. Bright blue like the ocean, the most beautiful color that Harry had ever seen.
He was going to miss this lot. He had only been living with them for a few months, but they had become like a family to him.
The nineteen-year-old was even more confused when Louis’ face also held nothing but concern. Louis simply had to hate him for what he was doing for a living.
“I..I..,” Harry stuttered, finally finding his voice. “I’ll be gone in ten minutes, I swear!”
“Harry,” Liam was the first once to react after moments of silence. “No one is kicking you out, love!”
Harry’s eyes grew wide at the confession, not understanding what he had just been told. He was not being kicked out? They actually wanted him to stay?
“But I thought,” he argued but this time it was Louis who cut him off, moving into the room until he was standing in front of the curly haired boy, smiling softly when he noticed how bad Harry was shaking.
Louis took one of Harry’s hands into his own, using the other one to brush away some curls from Harry’s face.
“Haz we just want some answers but we’re not here to judge you or kick you out. You’re our friend no matter what you do for a living!”
Even though it kills me to know that you’re sleeping with random people nearly every night!
That was exactly what it took for Harry to break down. He started sobbing, big fat tears running down his face. What did he do to deserve friends like that?
Louis wordlessly pulled Harry into a tight embrace, feeling his shirt get wet from all the tears but he didn’t care. He ran his hand up and down Harry’s back, turning over to see the other boys still standing in the doorway.
“I’m going to put on some tea,” Liam suggested, and Louis nodded his head, watching as Liam pulled Zayn and Niall out of the room as well.
“Shh Haz, I’ve got you,” Louis whispered into Harry’s ear as the boy continued to sob loudly.
“I’m so sorry,” Harry hiccupped after a few more moments, pulling away slightly from Louis’ chest.
Their eyes met once again and Louis’ heart broke when he saw all the emotions reflecting in the usual bright green eyes. Harry was scared and nervous, a hint of sadness reflecting through his eyes as well and the older boy was left wondering how strong Harry had to be to carry so much stuff around.
“Come one let’s go to the others and then we can talk,” he suggested and reached for Harry’s hand softly, pulling the boy out of the room.
**
No one really knew what to say when Harry was sitting in the living room. You can’t really start a conversation by saying “So you’re a whore?”, right?
Harry was sitting on the couch, biting on his thumbnail, looking down at the floor while the others all sat around him, looking at each other quite unsure.
It was once again Liam who finally found the right words to say, knowing that if he didn’t start talking now, no one else would.
“Harry please just let me tell you once again that what we just found out doesn’t change anything between the five of us! We’re not going to kick you out or judge you. We’d just like to know why you’re doing this.”
Harry took a deep breath, not daring to look up, staring at the floor instead of meeting anyone’s eyes, still scared of seeing disgust in his friends’ eyes.
“I have to do this,” he started speaking, his voice barely louder than a whisper and still thick with tears. “It’s the only thing I’m good at!”
“Harry, that’s…,” Niall was the first one to interrupt the curly haired boy but was quickly cut off by Harry.
“I know it’s true, Niall. Please don’t say what you’re about to say.”
Niall closed his mouth again, sighing loudly, looking at the other boys for help but they all shrugged their shoulders, obviously overwhelmed with the situation themselves.
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Zayn questioned after a few more moments and this time it was Harry who didn’t know how to react. Instead he just shrugged.
“What was I supposed to say? I’m a whore at night? I’m just going out to get fucked by some random men? Don’t wait up for me because I don’t know how long it’ll make him to come?”
Harry snorted his answer, his voice becoming louder, making it sound even worse and Louis cringed instantly.
“So how long have you been doing this? What about the restaurant?”
The curly haired boy gave a half-hearted chuckled. He’d be happy to work in some fancy restaurant instead of being a prostitute.
“I’ve been doing this for eight months now. Ever since I moved away from Cheshire. I hade left home without money and used to sleep on the street and then this man came up one night and offered me a place to stay at. I went with him and the next morning he offered me a job as a prostitute. I declined, and he wanted money instead so when I reached for my wallet I realized that he had stolen everything, and I couldn’t pay him, so I had to give him a blowjob instead.”
Harry’s voice was once again becoming thick with tears and some of them rolled down his cheeks.
“I was so disgusted but he wouldn’t let me go and so I worked for him for weeks. Apparently, I was good at my job but after ten weeks I couldn’t do this anymore and got away. Money was tight, so I found myself standing at Kings Cross a few days later and got the job I’m doing now.”
“So, you lied to us,” Liam simply stated, and Harry felt even worse now.
He knew that he deserved all of this, knew that the entire situation was his fault, but he hated himself for lying to his friends, the only people he could always rely on. He deserved to be kicked out, because all these months he had lied to the, making up stories about his family and work instead of telling the truth.
“Why?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Why did you lie to us? You could’ve told us the truth.”
“Liam, I think that’s enough now,” Louis stepped in, but Harry shook his head, smiling lightly at the older boy.
“No, it’s okay,” he quickly reassured his friend. “I was so embarrassed. You wouldn’t let me live here if I told you what I was doing for a living and that I used to be homeless. I couldn’t tell you. I was too ashamed, still am actually.”
“What about your family then?”
Harry felt his heart break a little bit at the question, thinking about his mother. It made him feel so sad knowing that everything could’ve been avoided, that all of this didn’t need to happen.
“When I told my mum and stepfather that I was gay they started ignoring met. It was like I wasn’t existing anymore. This went on for two years and on the day of my graduation I came home, and mum told me to pack my bags and leave.”
Louis felt anger rising in his chest. After all Harry was still their son and he couldn’t imagine what Harry had gone through. It made him feel sick to thin about people abandoning their loved ones because of their sexuality.
“Alright so I think I speak for the four of us when I tell you that we’re not kicking you out! All I’m saying is that you should stop doing this. For your own sake,” Liam explained, and the other boys nodded their heads in agreement.
“I can’t,” Harry sighed, his hand going to his hair. “I need the money. I have to pay rent, have to pay a lot of other things as my Oyster Card, stuff I need for Uni, groceries, clothes. My laptop is about to break down any moment. I came here with nothing, so I need to earn a lot in order to be able to save up some money.”
“I’ll pay for your room,” Louis suddenly blurted out.
He didn’t care if he needed to ask his mother for help to cover up the costs, knowing that she would help him anyway. He desperately needed Harry to stop doing this.
“What? No! No please don’t. I can’t accept that!”
“Well that’s not for you to decide, I guess,” Niall interrupted the younger boy and then looked at Louis. “I’m going to pay half of it.”
“I guess we’re all going to pay for your room. It’s just going to be like a few months ago when the room was empty. We’ve got this covered!”
Another tear escaped Harry’s eyes. He still had no idea why he deserved to have such loving friends.
“Thank you so much!” Harry sobbed and was quickly pulled into a group-hug.
“I think we should give Harry and Louis some time to talk now,” Zayn was the first to say, knowing that both boys probably needed some time. “Good night lads!”
**
Once the boys had left the room Louis and Harry were left sitting in the living room. Harrys heart was beating quite fast, his eyes locking with Louis’.
“Just say it,” the curly haired boy mumbled, pain evident in his voice.
“Say what exactly?”
“That this changes everything between the two of us. That you’re disgusted.”
Louis got up from his seat and walked over to the couch, sitting next to Harry. He wordlessly opened his arms and Harry was quick to wrap his arms around the older boy.
Tears were still streaming down his cheeks and he was hurting but with Louis being right here things seemed to be a little bit better.
“I’m not disgusted in you. At least I now know what’s been going on, but you should’ve told me anyway.”
“I couldn’t,” Harry sighed. “I couldn’t tell you and I can’t be with you knowing that I’d actually be cheating on you every single day. You don’t deserve this!”
“Well things are going to change now. Let’s go to bed now, Styles!”
**
“I’ll be home soon, don’t worry,” Harry told Louis as he was putting on his shoes, Louis standing in the doorway of the living room.
“I still don’t get this. At least let me come with you,” the older boy argued but Harry only shook his head.
Last night he hadn’t gotten any sleep at all, too busy to think about his life. He had decided to stop with his job, agreeing with his friends that he was going to find a way to earn some money.
But Harry being Harry wanted to go to Kings Cross one last time to inform Max about his decision and so he had decided to head over there, to tell him what he had decided to do.
Louis had argued that he didn’t owe anyone an explanation, but Harry had insisted on going.
“I have to do this. I feel like I need to do this in order to close this chapter of my life!”
“Alright,” Louis sighed, knowing that arguing with Harry wouldn’t get him to change his mind anyway. “I’ll wait for you to come back and if you need anything just give me a call!”
“I will. See you later, Boo!”
*
Once Harry arrived at Kings Cross he saw Max standing near the car, grinning when he saw the curly haired boy walking over.
It was a chill night in the beginning of February and Harry pulled his beanie further down, taking a deep breath.
“Hey Styles,” Max greeted the young boy, eyeing him from head to toe. “You’re here to tell me that you’re quitting, right?”
“How do you know?”
“Peter called me this morning and told me what he did. He’s waiting for you in his car, right around the corner.”
“I’m not here to get fucked again. I just wanted to let you know,” Harry replied, making Max laugh.
“So, you’re telling me that you just came here to tell me that you’re quitting? You don’t owe me anything you know that,” Max said, cocking his eyebrow. “Peter is offering to triple the money if he gets to fuck you one more time. Plus, he’s offering a tip of 500 pounds but since you’re not interested I’ll simply tell him to find a new slut.”
“I’ll do it,” Harry replied, not even thinking about what he had just agreed to.
He had actually promised Louis to come straight back home, but money was still tight, and he knew that he was going to earn a lot of money by doing this one last time.
One part of Harry wanted to get away, to run to Louis’ and fall straight into his arms and the other part knew that he was in need of the money and that he wouldn’t be cheating on Louis’ since they weren’t together. At least not yet.
“I knew you would. Have fun then,” Max simply told him, and Harry was quick to walk away.
*
“Good evening,” Harry said politely as he got into the car, Peter eyeing him from the side.
“Hello there,” he chuckled before starting the car. “I knew that you’re too much of a slut to miss this.”
Harry tactfully ignored the comment and looked out of the window, watching the houses pass by.
“This is the last time that I’m doing this.”
“I know love,” Peter replied, his hand getting in contact with Harry’s knee, caressing it gently. “But believe me when I tell you that you’ll never forget about it!”
“Where are you going?” Harry questioned as he noticed Peter driving past the hotel they had always spent their times with together.
“You’ll see babe,” the man answered and then stopped the car in front of an old-looking house.
“This is my home.”
Harry tensed and didn’t feel like getting out of the car. Something about this seemed off but before he had the chance to do anything, the door was being opened and he was grabbed roughly by the arm.
“Let’s get to business now, whore!” Peter growled before he unlocked the door and pushed Harry inside, the young boy nearly stumbling over his own legs.
“Let me go!” Harry demanded but Peter was a lot quicker to react and pushed the curly haired boy.
Harry fell backwards ending up on his ass on the carpet, the impact sending a jolt of pain up his spine.
“You’re nothing but a cheap whore,” Peter yelled loudly, his face full of rage. Harry had never seen a face so full of rage, no even his stepfather’s one when he had kicked him out.
“Please,” Harry stammered out though he didn’t know what he was begging for. He took in his surroundings and quickly realized that house was no one’s home.
Everything was dirty and dusty, there was barely any furniture but int the lightly lit living room on his right Harry saw a bloody mattress lying in the middle of the room and shuddered. He knew that he needed to get away. Quick.
“You think I spend all my money on you and then you can simply quit with this job? I owe you now, whore!” Peter screamed, and Harry swallowed hard as he began to shake.
Peter bend down and grabbed Harry’s wrist harshly, sending another jolt of pain through Harry. The man tugged on his wrist sharply as he made his way over to the living room, pushing Harry.
The curly haired boy lost his balance and fell forward, ending up on his knees right in front of the mattress. When he looked around his breath caught in his throat.
Harry tried to crawl away from Peter.
“Oh no you are fucking don’t!” he roared. “You’re going to learn your lesson and you’re going to take it like the whore you are!”
Harry knew right then that there was no going back, that Peter was going to hurt him, to probably kill him. He let his mind wander to Louis, sweet, loving Louis and tried to block out the pain the best he could.
*
“This is what you get, whore!” were the last words that Peter whispered into Harry’s ear as he dropped him of in front of his apartment complex. It was three in the morning and no one was out in the streets.
Harry’s knees gave out the moment Peter pulled him out of the car and he collapsed on the ground, unable to move. He heard Peter say something else and then the engine was being turned on and the car drove away.
Harry felt disgusted with himself. Cum and blood were seeping down the back of his thighs all the way to his ankles and when he tried to walk, a severe burning pain made him gasp.
The curly haired boy had trouble getting up, but he knew that he couldn’t stay here. He couldn’t risk someone seeing him like that. He needed to go to the flat, needed to go to Louis and so he tried his hardest to stand up.
Harry had to bite down on his tongue to stop himself from crying out loud but he somehow managed to make his way over to the door, unlocking in with shaking hands. Just a few more steps and he’d be home.
*
Louis was sleeping on the couch in the living room, his body not able to stay awake any longer. All damn night Louis had waited for Harry to come home. He had called the younger boy, had sent him hundreds of text messages but the curly haired boy hadn’t answered, and Louis was worried.
He had promised himself to stay awake, to wait for Harry but right after two in the morning he had fallen asleep.
Louis startled awake when he heard someone unlocking the door. He was up from the couch in the matter of seconds and bolted into the hallway, turning on the light.
In this moment Louis wished he hadn’t done this because he wasn’t prepared for this.
There was Harry, bloody and bruised. He was holding onto the wall for support, leaving a bloody hand-print on the wall.
His face was dirty, his nose bleeding and his lip was split. There were marks on his neck and Louis was quite sure that someone had choked Harry here. Blood was also running down Harry’s face, his hair matted in red crimson.
The younger boys’ clothes were ripped, his chest revealing some nasty bruises on his torso.
Before Louis had the chance to react Harry slid down the wall, hissing in pain.
“HARRY!”
“Lou?” he managed to say, slumped over though he was against the wall.
“Harry!” Louis voice was insistent. Harry wondered vaguely why his thoughts were processing so slowly and why his thinking felt blurry.
Concussion? Probably
The thought made Harry’s stomach feel nauseous. Puke rose in his mouth and he vomited. Someone was holding his head so that he was retching off to the side and not onto himself. He tried to wipe the vomit off of his face, but his entire body felt like it was on fire.
“I’ll get some help.”
**
When Louis bolted over to Harry he wanted to throw up, wanted to scream and cry at the same time but he knew that Harry needed him now.
The younger boy reeked of something disgusting and Louis figured that it was the smell of sex and cum, some of it was still on Harry’s face.
All of a sudden, the curly haired boy retched, and Louis had just enough time to hold his head so that he wasn’t throwing up on himself.
“I’ll get some help,” Louis quickly said and then ran over to Liam’s bedroom, opening the door with so much force that it shook.
On any other occasion Louis would’ve made some sneaky comment when he saw Zayn sleeping in the same bed than Liam but he didn’t have time now.
“LIAM, I NEED HELP!” he yelled, and the boy was awake almost instantly.
“Oh my god what happened to him?” Liam questioned once he made his way into the hallway and saw Harry sitting there.
“I don’t know but he’s hurt. Bad.”
“He needs to go to hospital! Call for an ambulance!”
*
“Did you hear anything yet?” Niall questioned as he walked back into the waiting area of the hospital, coffee in his hand.
“No yet,” Louis replied and shook his head no, tears forming in his eyes.
He knew that he would never get these images out of his head. Seeing Harry so bloody and broken, more dead than alive had done something to him.
“He’s going to be okay,” Zayn reassured them, his fingers intertwined with Liam’s.
It was 5.30 in the morning now, but all boys were at the hospital desperately waiting for some news on Harry.
It was 5.43 in the morning when the door finally opened, and a female doctor walked into the waiting area.
“Is there anyone here for Harry Styles?”
“We’re his flat mates,” Liam quickly introduced themselves and the doctor nodded her head.
“I have Mr. Styles’ permission to inform you about his health. Mr. Styles suffers form a concussion, two broken ribs, a sprained wrist and some bruises all over his body. We had to stitch up the wound on his head. He’s going to be fine in a little while,” she explained and then looked back at the boys.
“Mr. Styles was brutally raped tonight. He has some internal bleeding in his anus and a bad tear that we had to stitch up. We took some examples and sent them to the police already. Mr. Styles needs a lot of rest. He’s not allowed to walk around a lot and has to be on a strict diet. He’s only allowed to eat light food because we don’t want him risking bursting the stitches. He insists on going home so I was expecting you to take him home?”
“Absolutely!”
When the boys walked into the room Harry was currently in, their hearts broke. His face was pale and there was a bandage wrapped around his head. The bruises around his neck looked even darker than before and Harry started crying the minute he laid eyes on his friends.
“I’m sorry,” he sobbed but Louis was quick to close the distance between the two of them, taking Harry’s hand into his own, careful to not hurt him any further.
“You have nothing to be sorry for, babe!”
“Can we go home now?”
*
A little while later Harry was being wheeled out of the hospital by Niall. The police had stopped by and had asked him questions but he had been too tired to answer them.
Liam helped Harry off the chair and gently into the car, buckling up his seat belt. He quickly got into the driver’s seat and looked at Harry whose eyes were screwed up tightly shut.
“Breathe for me. I know you’re hurting but breathe slowly.”
It was as if Louis had some magical hands because when he reached around the seat from behind, his hand resting on Harry’s hip the younger boy instantly relaxed and helped Harry’s breathing return to normal.
Once Liam stopped the car in front of their apartment they all helped Harry out of the car and up the stairs.
It didn’t take long until Harry was lying in bed, trying to get some sleep but the demons seemed to be coming back every time he closed his eyes.
“Lou,” he said loudly, the older boy nearly running into the room.
They had insisted that Harry left the door to his room open in case he needed anything.
“Yes, love? Are you in pain? Do you need anything?”
“Lie with me?”
“Absolutely.”
**
It took weeks for Harry to bounce back to normal, the wounds healing slowly but with the help if his friends he had managed to get better.
Louis and Harry were now a couple, supporting each other through everything and even though Louis knew that Harry wasn’t ready to do anything sexual he was willing to wait forever if Harry needed him to.
Zayn and Liam had made things official between as well now and even Niall was seeing some girl he had met at Uni.
Things were finally looking up and as long as Harry had his friends by his side he knew that they’d keep him safe.
The new OneShot is coming on Friday ☺️ I‘m so looking forward to post it. It‘s so long and I‘m so proud of it! Hope you guys like it!
Also thank you guys so much for all your incredible prompts! I‘m going to stick with Harry Centric One Shots for a little while and even had some ideas of my own that I want to write desperately so watch this space!
Thank you so much for your kind words :) Don‘t worry about me - I‘m perfectly fine. I‘m working a lot this month (13 hour shifts five times a week) and barely have any free time and if I have I spend it with family or get some much needed sleep.
I‘m not able to write as much as I‘d love to so everything is happening rather slow. I have this 5k Harry-Centric prompt and I‘m only halfway through it so please be patient, I‘ll try to post something soon!
Once summer is over it‘ll be a lot calmer at the restaurant and then I‘ll have more time. For now please bear with me!