It had been four days since Hollies passing, and surely enough, sleep did not come easy to Heidi as it used to. In the span of those four days she had only acquired a little over three hours of sleep in total. On the second night out of the four, Heidi flat out refused to get any rest in fear of suffering another night terror. But during the other two nights she did make the effort to try and lull herself to sleep, bit each time she did, she found herself stirring awake from a strange dream or lying wide awake in the middle of the night, half expecting to receive a message from hollie.
Heidi relaxed herself against her mattress and closed her eyes, a powerful yawn leaving her body. Her head eased into her pillow and to her surprise within a few minutes she began to feel herself slipping. It felt strange to not fall asleep against hollies body but Heidi knew that she would have to get used to this form of sleeping by her lonesome self once again. She just hoped that the night wouldn't bring her any nightmarish dreams. All she wanted to do was see hollies face again even if it was just for a second. Heidi finally fell asleep.
That night, she dreamt of the first night hollie had come over to her house. She dreamt of how hollie had buried herself into the mustard yellow blanket to watch the movie 'Cloud Atlas' that played on the laptop screen and how hollie had told her it was her favourite movie because no matter what, she believed, like the characters, that in another life they will always find each other. Only in this life hollie would be better. Heidi could still feel the pink and blonde strands of hollies hair brushing against her cheek whenever she moved. She still saw the way hollies band T Shirt would slip off her shoulder everytime she stirred and how the feel of hollies weight on her would take her breath away. It was all still there but there was something different about it all that puzzled heidi.
At one point in her dream Heidi looked out the window. The night sky had suddenly become a pale blue, and the warm orange glow of the sun spread across the horizon. She turned her head to look at hollie, and watched her as she lay in her arms. Heidi said her name, and to this, hollie stirred awake. She turned her head and met Heidi's gaze with weary, well rested eyes. She stretched and stifled a yawn, pushed a hand through the mess that was her hair and relaxed her head against Heidi's shoulder.
Sunlight broke into the room, cascading all along the walls and floor, and casting shadows all around. It lit hollies face up just enough for heidi to take in those healthy features that were staring back at her. She felt her heart rate accelerate and her throat tightened as her vision blurred. Hollie beamed at her with a smile that spoke a thousand words and her hand reached out to touch Heidi's cheek. Heidi felt her palm, walm and full, caressing the round of her face. She leaned into her touch, and her vision began to fade, her eyes filling with tears.
Hollie leaned in and touched her forehead to Heidi's. She was only a blurred shape now, but Heidi knew she was still there. Hollie spoke, her voice peaceful. Healthy. Whole.
A trembling tender laugh escaped Heidi. She smiled.
(Not degrassi but Heidi's birthday present)
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