Merci pour le venin.

I'm Emily. I'm as emo and gay as 2005 Gerard Way.

[makeupobsession]

[spaceyjules-deactivated20180305]

If you call pedophilia a kink please unfollow me and never talk to me again

[spaceyjules-deactivated20180305]

Isn’t it disgusting that 23 people just unfollowed me

[clarknokent]

Unfollow me too

[gothhabiba]

this goes double if you call paedophilia a disability. unfollow me twice

[closet-keys]

and if you call pedophilia an “orientation” or in any way compare it to being LGBP+ you can unfollow, delete your blog, and set yourself on fire. 

[harlivy]

y'all about some white dude: protect him at all costs!

Me: from what sharon. From what.

[ponyfiasco]

the consequences of his own actions

[spoopercorp]

Holy shit.

[ultrafacts]

Source If you want more facts, follow Ultrafacts

[maggiemunkee]

I read an anecdote from someone whose African Grey didn’t particularly get along with her Amazon parrot, Paco. One night she was preparing cornish hens for dinner, while the grey hung out with her in the kitchen. He got a closer look at one of the hens, looked his mama dead in the eyes and asked, “Paco?” Then he laughed.

[vitiateoriginator]

that is one sadistic bird 

[mentalhealthfemme]

I am slightly afraid now.

[syndonic-deactivated20160709]

I love birds?

[toshio-the-starman]

African Grey Parrots are one of the smartest birds, and seems they can be known to play “jokes” or “pranks” on their owners or any visitors.

I was visiting a friend of the family one time and I was just casually watching tv when I thought I heard the water running. I go into the kitchen but everything’s fine. the parrot looks at me and says “gotcha”.

Parrots are awesome.

[whatswrongwithblue]

I have an African Grey named Loki and he lives up to his name.

He likes to scream and mimic the sounds of things falling off the shelf and when we run into the room to see what’s happening he says “The cat did it! Bad Sammy!” and laughs.

Whenever he gets mad at me he flies away from me, but since he can’t fly very well, he always crash lands. And the first thing he says when I go to pick him up, without fail, is always “You need to vacuum,” in a very bitter grumble. 

Loki likes to call our cat to him. He’ll sit there for minutes saying “here kitty kitty kitty.” The cat will come, walk up to the bird, get bit and then Loki will laugh as the cat screams and runs away. This goes on for hours. 

If it’s late at night and he’s tired, but I’m still up with the lights on, he’ll say “Loki go night night.” It’s starts of in a normal tone and then gets louder and louder until he’s screaming “LOKI GO NIGHT NIGHT!” 

If he sees my dad fall asleep, he screams like a little girl to scare my dad awake. And then laughs. He’s kind of perfected that evil laugh.

But the best one was when I brought home the man who has since become my ex for the first time, Loki looked him dead in the eyes and said “I’m going to bite you.” My parrot was the first one to see what a bad person my ex. He was smarter than us all. 

[buggery-approved]

Parrots are people.

[countess7-deactivated20210515]

@oneshortdamnfuse

[theofficialvincenzo]

African Greys are like the greatest animal on the planet

[outragedbird]

When I was a kid, we had a rescued african grey called Dodi, and once I was arguing with my mum about my bed time, and the parrot (who had some very foul mouthed previous owners) just shouted at me “for fuck sake go to bed!” also whenever we hoovered he’d call us “yoooou dusty cunts” best thing was he had a scottish accent

[nuttyrabbit]

Reblogging for Scottish swearing parrot

[pati79]

I almost died choked with a piece of cake because of the last one.

[azcrowleyfell]

@farragoofwires

[vanessacarlysle]

Sir, if you don’t mind my saying, I’m a little concerned. I’ve seen you go through similar phases in…

[esdnz]

[fhlorant-deactivated20200920]

[aestheticacadema]

aesthetics

[2xghi0dgh65-deactivated20190207]

i have no followers on twitter and i wanted to show this off

[tastefullyoffensive]

[caleforpresident]

Give him space He can do it

[thepipsqueakery]

View this post on Instagram

When Marcelene drained her water bottle and soaked her nest I also got this video of this sweet little baby cleaning his face! How cute is he? Are you ded of the cute yet? #hamster #baby #weeklyfluff #dedofthecute

[colleenclarkart]

[ayearofdan]

It’s May 19th 2017

Here’s a good Dan song remix to listen to today: Polio by HollowTunes Here’s a good Grumps episode to watch today: Chuck Rock Here’s a cool Dan fact for you today: Dan was not an athletic kid growing up, but he played little league baseball. They stuck him in the outfield because he wasn’t very good and since no balls ever came his way he’d just sit on his knees and play with the dirt while the game was going on. While watching one of his games and seeing him do this Avi remarked to Deb, “Eh, I don’t think is Dan going to be an athlete…” Here’s a good picture of Dan to look at today:

[okaymad]

[womanifesting]

This is the meme content I like to see

[astrangertomykin]

let me tell u something chefs love memes about how a kitchen works and this one caused my entire kitchen to riot and my head chef sent it to all the area chefs in the company

[ommanyte]

I arrive in Africa

Drums: echoing Boy: hurried Rains: blessed

[trevenanl-deactivated20200913]

I am forcibly dragged away from you

[jessehimself]

[vsnaire]

Everyone IN NY should read this

Everyone who wants to come to NY should read this

Everyone should read this if you’re thinking about NY in any way, shape or form.

[fggssdf-deactivated20150219]

Everyone should fucking read this

[grumpy-pewdiplieyer]

I love when Arin says something like “watch this” or “I’ve got this” and something bad happens immediately and Dan bursts into laughter.

[bpdbuttercup]

yes I am fully aware that I’m The Worst™ but I still wanna be like……. loved and stuff

[taylormakaveli-deactivated20251]

basically