begging the shell-slipped pearl

the settling curve the blue the pressure the light and wind after storm what can i do about it!

[3chrysanthemum]

[ialwaysbelieve]

Left hand on heart

i am remembering the feeling

[3chrysanthemum]

[3chrysanthemum]

 i’m so affected by objects, it’s silly. muji kitchen-ware section is so cute, makes me feel very heavy & sad, i want to cry, i feel ashamed about it. of course maybe it’s not actually the objects themselves it’s me my want my open mouth projected/reflected onto my perception. it is the dream-image of the object which moves me, the aura  shadow of a branch flicking on blacktop  a thing produced by distance, which facilitates desire.  i so want a life of my own, i so fear i’ll never have it, small things like soup bowls encompass/compose so much of that the lacquer the ritual the repetition the contentment  i shy away even as it pulls closer  of course it’s the distance which moves me, which i’ve come to love.

[t-h-e-flower-girl]

℘ɧơɬơɠrą℘ɧყ ცყ ɬ-ɧ-ɛ-ʄƖơῳɛr-ɠırƖ

[3chrysanthemum]

[thingsfromthedirt]

[3chrysanthemum]

[3chrysanthemum]

What’s weird is that my memory from that time is totally missing. I don’t remember having a fever, or being at the clinic, or acting or saying anything strange. Instead, I was dreaming. I dreamed I traveled somewhere far away. There were endless forests and a huge lake. Herds of strange animals lived by the water, and there were no humans anywhere. I thought I could see buildings in the distance, and I made my way toward them through the tall plants. No matter how long I walked, they never came nearer. Something flew through the air. A big bird. Its plaintive cry seemed to fill the sky.

Kawakami Hiromi, Under the Eye of the Big Bird

[3chrysanthemum]

[3chrysanthemum]

What’s weird is that my memory from that time is totally missing. I don’t remember having a fever, or being at the clinic, or acting or saying anything strange. Instead, I was dreaming. I dreamed I traveled somewhere far away. There were endless forests and a huge lake. Herds of strange animals lived by the water, and there were no humans anywhere. I thought I could see buildings in the distance, and I made my way toward them through the tall plants. No matter how long I walked, they never came nearer. Something flew through the air. A big bird. Its plaintive cry seemed to fill the sky.

Kawakami Hiromi, Under the Eye of the Big Bird

[3chrysanthemum]

[ontologicalevil]

The trick is to be more curious than you're scared.

[3chrysanthemum]

a warm night, window open, packing has begun in earnest. i am leaving again, my home of three years. this place has been such a gift i love my little basement room, always cool, always quiet, earthy sanctuary  the most safe i’ve ever felt  I’ll miss it so bad, i already do   i feel so grateful, i can barely breath, this is all moving along so quickly, like city lights receding. i knew this was coming, also I didn’t; what can i do? i don’t know   i listen to Alien 9 soundtrack, to Quiet Light’s new record. it’ll be okay it’ll be ok it’ll be OK

[3chrysanthemum]

a dream within a dream, i saw her, glistening black and alive

[3chrysanthemum]

ohhhh i find these under-cabinet cd players so so spiritous and captivating, they suggest so much, like yes yes please lets put on an album we love on a sunny day early evening just woke up from nap languid  head-buzzing we’ll have a coffee and a snack and talk about dinner, loud over the music ‘cause we won’t turn it down  the music needs the space  from under the cabinet just at neck level  we’re just visitors here  the sun is leaning through the window tossed across the table like candlelight  weighted blanket over everything  and we’ll dance maybe and the world will be still maybe and we’ll return to ourselves maybe

[3chrysanthemum]

becoming a bird for a brief and subtle moment

embracing a cyborg imagination

becoming a knife

keep warm setting on rice cooker

facing your pearly accumulates 

stumbling into greater depths

[catnpc]

どうぶつの森：ねこ