"Katie Killjoy here for 666 News!"

Katie Killjoy rp blog. NSFW allowed for 18+ followers, usually done in a read more tab. It's heavily headcanon and may possibly divert from canon material until Hazbin Hotel actually comes out. Follows back from askshadetrixieandfamily, please read rules page before interacting.

[supesart]

Katie Killjoy

[666newsstar]

Did she say bad things to you

“Listen, pal. I don’t need a knight in shining armor, I need you to GO AWAY.”

[666newsstar]

Y Charlie say curse word at you

“Wow, nice grammar. You 3 years old or something, twerp?”

[666newsstar]

Do you know Charlie is doing today

“How about fixing your english before you talk to me, kid?”

[666newsstar]

So I wanna talk to you

“Alright?”

[666newsstar]

Hi Katie killjoy my name is Jordan

“Um... Hello?”

[moretrashyrpmemes]

I am a roleplayer with anxiety

I swear I don’t ignore you, our threads, asks, meme posts and starters. I just get anxious.

I’m worried if I reply too fast you’ll think I’m desperate but if I reply too slow you’ll think I’m uninterested.

I’m worried if I don’t send memes you think I use you as a meme archive but if I do I’m annoying.

I’m worried not getting asks makes me hated but getting too many makes me a narcassist.

I’m worried that everything I do is wrong or not good enough and I am so sorry.

[666newsstar]

I need to find an rp partner or something to get this blog going again.

[666newsstar]

Maybe pack it up and switch to a different character?

[666newsstar]

I need to find an rp partner or something to get this blog going again.

[666newsstar]

I have an idea for an interaction, but I need a specific character for it.

One of the Overlords (including Alastor), Charlie, or Lucifer.

[666newsstar]

Actually, now that I think about it, it should work with all characters outside of Tom (whom she bullies and tortures regularly)

[666newsstar]

I have an idea for an interaction, but I need a specific character for it.

One of the Overlords (including Alastor), Charlie, or Lucifer.

[666newsstar]

I think I’ll try to revive this blog as well.

[666newsstar]

At the risk of getting a snarky answer...do you sometimes wish that your life turned out different when you were alive, Ms. Killjoy?

After all, while you may be famous for your news show...fame in Hell can only last for so long.

And we both know that Vox is possibly an opportunist who can replace you, at any given moment and that Lucifer doesn't give a damn about his subjects, if he is willing to let a vast number of them be mercilessly slaughtered at the end of the year.

So I ask again, Ms. Killjoy...do you sometimes wish that your life could have turned out differently, back when you were alive? Where you could have worked hard to overcome whatever problems made you this way? So that God would welcome you in his kingdom and that you wouldn't have to live in Hell with the nagging fear of being replaced...or worse?

Really think long and hard about the question I have asked, before you give your answer, Ms. Killjoy.

“Well let me start off by saying Vox would never replace me. I know this because I got him by the balls by being the only newscaster with the guts to report everything. Even if it involves degrading my boss, I’ll do it with a smile on my face!”

Her usual smile turns into a somber, thought-filled frown as she lights a cigarette.

“And if my life had turned out differently... I may not be here. I’d still be alive. True, I did awful shit to end up down here, but the job comes before morals. And my fame lasts long enough, probably longer since I assaulted Lucifer’s little dipshit on live TV. The only difference between here and the living world is censorships.” She snuffs her cigarette with a smile on the anon’s forehead. “Or lackthereof.”

[frenchiefieart]

🦇❤️🔮

[cis-het-angel-kinnie-deactivate]

Helsa: You’re the exact same person now that you were back in high school: a total and complete loser!

Charlie: So, you think I’m a loser? Just because I have a family that doesn’t respect me and a whole city that curses the day I was born? Well, that may mean loser to you, but let me tell you something. Every morning when I wake up, I know that I’m gonna be suffering for the next 16 hours. So I get up, I go to the kitchen and I get cussed out by my best friend because I won’t let him drink vodka at 7:00 AM. I discuss the future of the hotel with a man who only supports it because he wants to see the guests fail. I spend every waking hour of my miserable existence trying to sell the idea of redemption to people who couldn’t care less. I’ll never be the lead in a Broadway musical like I thought I would. I’ll never be respected by my peers. And I’ll never again know the joy of hearing my father say that he loves me. But I’m not a loser. Because, despite it all, I wake up every morning with a big smile on my face and a song in my heart, ready to fight for what I believe in. And the fact that I haven’t put a gun in my mouth, you contemptuous bitch, makes me a winner!

[wandawillkill312]

@wclometohell

@inside-of-every-demon

@666newsstar ((Just imagine Charlie saying this to Katie.))

[666newsstar]

Katie would actually gain some respect for her for finally letting that all out.

[pxppinmolly-archived]

back on this bullshit!

[wandawillkill312]

"Of Sass and Solvent."

"...The family dog dug up the charred, headless corpse." Said Tom Trench- co-anchor of 666 News.

"Now for something humorous!"

"Our very own Princess of Hell has recently taken in 3 new guests at her hotel."

"For many of you folks at home, they're blasts from the past, but for a me, it's more like a face-full of the future."

"That's right folks, the Happy Hotel's new guests are none other than 1960s South American Dictator Carlos "The Cannibal" Cortez- say that 3 times fast-, 1980s serial killer Luigi "Dollmaker" Valentino and 1990s DJ/Cyberterrorist Jimmy "Stinger" Springfield.

"Anything you have to say about that, Katie?"

[666newsstar]

"My form? I just get my other limbs out. What are you talking about?"

[wandawillkill312]

"As you have noticed, once you enter Hell, you are transformed into whatever you either hate or fear." He said.

"Take Angel Dust being a spider demon."

"But sometimes you're transformed into what you died from as part of our beloved King's ironic sense of humor- like the Radio Demon and his Deer-like appearance."

"So, what did you transform into, when you first got here?"

[666newsstar]

"I'm a spider demon, like Angel but more in the sense of a black widow. While I have a smooth carapace, that pornstar's family including him seem to be more like tarantulas."

[wandawillkill312]

"Cool. Mine was..."custom made", courtesy of Lucifer making me his pet project." He said rolling up of his sleeves to show her anatomically correct and well detailed stitch and patchwork.

His arm then opened up to reveal mechanics and hidden compact weapons.

"He needed a durable servant, after all...and ironically a first ever toy to give to his daughter as a kid- who BTW, was not all rainbows and puppies! Bitch really put me through the ringer, until she got bored with me at age 13."

"Also speaking of pain, thank you for all those times you caused me harm."

"They were a constant reminder that I could still feel...which is good."

[666newsstar]

"I see. So what was the little shit like as a kid?"

[wandawillkill312]

"Extremely energetic, creative and wreckless!" He said.

"When her dad told her how durable I was, she introduced me to her amusement park- made from industrial machines designed and painted to look like a carnival- Lucifer gave this to her, of course. Charlie just expanded it- especially when received more and more toys."

"However; unlike me, they were actual toys, that didn't last long."

"Through it all, I just stood there, watching through a smiling doll helmet/mask Lucifer trapped my head in, wearing a combination of Dandy attire and a Carnival Barker's outfit."

[666newsstar]

"Wait, so you can't actually take that thing off?" She says as she moves on to the next dish.

[wandawillkill312]

"Katie I can change my masks depending on whatever occasion- like I came to your door, wearing a golden one." He said, doing the same thing.

"Speaking of which, would you like to see my face, or should I save that for after we have sex?"

[666newsstar]

She thinks for a moment, downs her drink, and shudders from the strength of it. "During. In fact, hurry it up and finish."

[wandawillkill312]

7 minutes later, it was time.

Tom showed up out of his clothes.

He had lightly sun-kissed fair skin and like his hand, his entire body was also covered in anatomically correct stitching and patchwork.

He was also very toned and muscular. His usual suit didn't do him justice.

His package was also impressive, as his penis was the length of a Magnum 500 revolver and the texture of a cucumber, while his sack was the size of a big Macintosh apple.

Finally; over his head, he wore full-headed and realistic latex mask made to look like a much more handsome version of 80s Arnold Schwarzenegger combined with a sewn-on golden canary yellow blonde wig made to look like a soft, shiny and really voluminous Elvis pompadour with sideburns and a semi-big curl dangling in the front.

The face was decorated with Ziggy Stardust facepaint.

Finally he wore twin bullet bandoliers across his chest, a gold medallion and a royal purple cowboy bandana around his neck, a pair of shades, a red "Rambo" headbandana and of course an extra-strength condom.

He smiled at Katie, as this commando was ready to "do battle!"

[666newsstar]

Katie looked at this ridiculous ensemble he was wearing and just stared. All she had on was a bathrobe she was currently untying.

[wandawillkill312]

He was a bit nervous but played it off.

10 seconds later, they were having sex.

Tom decided to start off small by doing Missionary first, before getting into the freaky stuff like S&M.

He hoped he was doing good. He watched at least 12 pornos and read 2 Kama sutra books, before coming over.

[666newsstar]

Katie was reading a magazine during their doggystyle. She was turned on, no denying that, but the ridiculous outfit he had on cancelled out her interest. Halfway through she sighed. “Stop, stop stop stop. Tom, you look like an idiot.”

[wandawillkill312]

"Yeah...you're right..." He said, taking off everything, but the condom.

He finally revealed his face- his real face.

In terms of hotness, it was a 7 1/2 out of 10 with a the stitchwork made to look like a combination of a Scarecrow's face and a skull design- complete with slight dark circles around the eyes- which were blue.

Lucifer did this, of course.

He also had slight cheekbone detail, a regular jawline, a moderate cleft chin, kissable lips and his regular blonde hair.

"I'm sorry..."

You can tell he was a bit insecure about his face.

[666newsstar]

Her jaw drops to the floor before she composes herself. "Just, don't try to be overly flamboyant with the ridiculous costumes. Now, let's try missionary again."