Kiss me properly and pull me apart.

Formerly known as Nelly--. Geelong, 26 a space to place the things that put a smile on my face.Curiosity killed the cat.About me.My face.

[a--fortunate--accident]

Oh tumblr. ..

It’s been awhile.

Since I was last on here I've started a full time job and bought an amazing house. Everything's coming up Milhouse.

[itslolathepug]

[shortvideosandstuff]

[coral]

[notmebbe-deactivated20260425]

Mine 😍

[a--fortunate--accident]

anyone know where I can find these?

[kittiezandtittiez]

[a--fortunate--accident]

House hunting online and I found the ugliest bathroom I've ever seen. It looks like Shrek threw up.

[tears-dry]

[cultporn]

[thatsnicebutimmarried]

The life of a pet owner: “What are you eating? OH GOD WHAT ARE YOU EATING???”

[myresin]

"Come back here with whatever you’re eating!"

[petrpetrpuckeater]

"Don’t think you can fool me by stopping chewing. I know you’re still eating it!"

[fayethesuccubus-deactivated2017]

"Open your mouth. OPEN. YOUR. MOUTH."

[absolutebisaster]

The best part is that all of these can be seen as the owner’s perspective or the pet’s and it’s all still accurate.

[nurturexyourxtemple]

[sativarose]

[cinyma]

That’s just the point. It can’t stop at once, because it’s in you, and you can’t stop something that’s inside you.

[a--fortunate--accident]

Being an adult.

How do normal people have appointments with mortgage brokers, do house inspections and go to the doctors and still manage to work a full day! The thought of how I'm going to manage all this hurts my head! Also...any "tips" on what to look for in a house inspection would be greatly appreciated. Other than you know...trying to imagine furniture in the room and figuring out the actual leftover size of the room which I'm terrible at!

[kittiezandtittiez]

[kittiezandtittiez]

[a--fortunate--accident]

In which my dad learns about purses and jeans sizes.

My dad: Your sister's crazy. Who'd want a $200 purse?

Me: She does.

My dad: What is it with ladies purses, anyway?

Me: (glancing at my purse) What do you mean?

My dad: How did that start--I mean, why do women use them? Doesn't it get tiring carrying a bag around all the time?

Me: (stands up and turns around) See those pockets?

My dad: ... Yes?

Me: What can I fit in them?

My dad: What?

Me: How many things do you think I could fit in my pockets? Honestly. How many things?

My dad: Doesn't look like you could fit much.

Me: A pack of Orbit, some folded bills, and that's about it. That's why we use purses--because we can't carry our shit in our pockets like you do.

My dad: But I can fit my wallet, my keys, and my cigarettes in my pockets!

Me: And your jeans also fit the way they should.

My dad: I'm almost afraid to ask, but what do you mean?

Me: Your jeans are sized by, what, your inseam and waist, right?

My dad: ... Aren't yours?

Me: I'm a size 3.

My dad: 3 what?

Me: No, just a 3. A size 3.

My dad: What does that mean?

Me: I actually have no idea. I'm a size 3 in these jeans. In some other jeans, I'm a 5. I'm a 7 in my favorite pair of shorts.

My dad: Wait, it's not the same?

Me: Nope. A size 3 in one brand's jeans is completely different from a size 3 in another brand.

My dad: That's fucking stupid! How do you shop for them?!

Me: With great difficulty. This is why when you ask me what I did during the week and despite the fact I know you won't care I sometimes tell you I found a pair of jeans. Because finding a pair of jeans that fit and fit well is like finding the Holy Grail with your name encrusted in diamonds on it