Hi! Welcome to my blog! I hope that you guys enjoy my writing, and I thought that I'd give you a bit of information about myself and this page.
My name is Alex! You can call me that, A.N. Conrad, or just "author" if you'd like! I'm nonbinary, and my pronouns are whatever you feel like using. I don't have a preference, really.
My blog is always open to requests (submitted at this [LINK] or via ask), however I have ADHD, classes, and a job, so I can't always get to everyone's requests in a timely manner. Especially when my ADHD doesn't feel like cooperating. So feel free to request, but please understand if I don't get to it right away. I also won't write things that I am not personally comfortable with.
All of my one-shots will be posted here, but longer fics will be available on my AO3 [HERE] because I do not like having to update masterlists.
If you have any questions about me or my writing, feel free to ask.
I made a little pilot episode of a sci fi podcast because I haven’t been able to work lately (chronic illness is a bitch). It’s 5 minutes. Check it out if you’re interested!
[Summary: Date treats you colder than your other coworkers, and despite how much you don’t want to admit it, it drove you insane. (Not necessarily romantic, but may get there in later parts)
Warnings: Mentions of pornography (this IS Date we’re talking about), AI:The Somnium Files spoilers, I’m ignoring the mask thing (That’s just his face to me), mentions of murder and violence, swearing, alcohol
Request: No request. Just me getting back into the fanfiction brainrot now that I’m not super sick anymore. Request here through my survey! (https://forms.gle/D9rsJtkERoBPaKvv8)]
You weren’t sure what to think of Kaname Date when you first started at ABIS. Boss told you that he was good at what he did, but… well, her exact words were “He’s got quite the personality”. Eventually, you were fairly certain that you had a decent handle on who he was. He was thorough and determined enough that you understood Ryuki’s admiration of him. He genuinely was a good detective with a strong sense of justice. Though, you couldn’t say that Mizuki and Aiba were wrong to call him a “pervert” and roll their eyes at some of his ridiculous behavior. Your own AI partner had informed you of his strange response to pornographic magazines. It had helped you out in a fight or two, but that didn’t mean you didn’t find it strange.
But more than his cleverness and less than appropriate habits, you noticed that he was kind. You heard him reassure Ryuki when the rookie messed things up. You saw how he went out of his way to protect Iris and Mizuki. He really did treat Mizuki like his own kid. Something in their constant bickering just felt like familial love. The same could be said about his interactions with Aiba, though you only got to see one side of that bickering usually.
Despite that, his kindness rarely seemed to be directed at you. In fact, he rarely spoke to you when he could avoid it.
“Focus,” Tsuki, your AI partner, reminded you. Their voice sounded in your mind like it was your own. It was quite the adjustment when you had first started working for ABIS, but it was beginning to feel natural. “You’re here on a case. You can complain about Date later.”
“Shut up,” you responded in your own head, turning back to the crime scene that you and Date were meant to be investigating. We already had three bodies from a new serial killer, and Boss decided you needed some extra eyes. And who better than Date, right?
“Have you figured out what they’re using?” Date asked, looking down at the body in front of him. They were clearly shot, it happened in broad daylight, but no one had seen any suspects when it happened. Normally that would point towards a long range rifle, but there weren't any rifling markings on the bullet.
“I have Pewter seeing if he can figure out a way to design a long ranged rifle without any rifling. That’s the only thing that makes sense with the situation,” you respended, trying to hide your irritation. The same irritation that arose in your chest whenever Date spoke to you. Why did he treat you so coldly? What the fuck did he have against you?
“If he can figure that out it might help us track the weapon,” Date replied. If he had noticed the sharpness in your tone, he didn’t acknowledge it. “Any other leads?”
“Both of the earlier victims went to the same grocery store the day before. Tsuki confirmed that our newest victim’s phone location record puts her there yesterday, too. My guess is that’s where our killer is finding new victims. We can check it out, but it's a big place. I don’t have a ton of hope of finding something helpful there. I also want to talk to Mama and the Kumakura’s to see if they know anything about the weapon that we’re looking for. You have an in with the chairman of the Kumakura’s, right?”
Date nodded, agreeing that those were probably good places to start. The two of you decided to head out together, both riding in Date’s car. It was old fashioned, but you kind of liked it. It looked cool. Not that you would ever admit that to Date, willingly. The car ride was awkward and quiet, but you were used to it. It was always like this with you and Date.
- - - - -
By the end of the day, you hadn’t gotten much further. You had a list of grocery store employees with anger management problems to look over, but with former employees and regular customers added, even Aiba and Tsuki would take a while to look through that all. Moma and Mama had nothing new for you on the weapon, and Pewter was still figuring it out, though he was making progress. And both Aiba and Tsuki needed to charge, leaving just you and Date. There wasn’t much more you could do at that point until the AI-balls were done charging, and frankly both of you were getting a little annoyed with having nothing to go on.
“At least with the New Cyclops case, everything was all connected,” Date muttered, pulling the eyepatch over his left eye. You opted for a non-AI prosthetic when Tsuki was out of commission. “This one just seems all over the place. I need a drink.”
“I can agree with you there,” you sighed. You were planning to go back to Marble and complain to Mama. She was a good listener and the drinks were good. And you needed a break.
“Where am I dropping you off?” Date asked, getting back into his car after your stop.
“Ugh, just drop me at Marble. I’ll get myself a cab when I’m ready to go. I’m going to think myself to death if I try to just go home and sleep,” you said, shaking your head at the thought of trying to just relax. You supposed this was why Date, Ryuki, and Boss had all started to make a habit out of this.
“Might as well just go with then, since I was planning to do the same thing,” Date said, his voice still a little measured, like he was reluctant to grab a drink with you. Despite going out with just about all of your other coworkers. You weren’t crazy for taking it personally, you reassured yourself. But truthfully, you were too exhausted from digging around and finding nothing that you couldn’t bother being too annoyed.
- - - - -
Mama greeted you again when you got to Marble, taking the chance to tease about just how many times in a day you’ve visited her. She gave you both the same drinks as usual without asking, knowing full well that neither of you were in the mood to try anything new. You never were when a case was going badly. Neither you nor Date said much, besides a little bit of chitchat with Mama. Despite not talking to each other, you couldn’t help but study Date a little. You wouldn’t admit this while you had Tsuki, but you didn’t hate him. You wanted to dislike him, but you just couldn’t. And that’s what made the distance that he puts between you all the more frustrating. You didn’t know why. You couldn’t think of anything that you did to offend him. Yet, he treats you with all of the distance of a stranger.
He was deep in thought, but neither of you said anything as you downed a few drinks. Mama kept handing you more as you sat in silence, eyeing you like the tension between you was something entertaining. You supposed she always loved a little drama. It made sense that she could tell something was up, and you were sure she was plenty curious. She didn’t say anything as you drank in silence, though, and you were glad for that.
It wasn’t long before your mind started to feel a bit fuzzy, though. A bit too fuzzy for you to keep up your mask of distance. Date seemed a bit better off than you, but you were sure that the drinks were getting to him too.
“I know I’m good looking, but the staring could be a little subtler,” he said, snapping you out of the blurry fog that you had sunk into. You hadn’t even realized how blatantly you were staring. You looked away quickly, causing your head to spin a little. Hopefully the blush you could feel rising on your cheeks could believably be blamed on the drinking.
“Don’t let it go to your head,” you replied, trying to salvage your pride even a little, “I was just thinking and happened to space out in that direction.”
“About what?”
“Huh?”
“What were you thinking about?”
You sat for a minute, one that felt like an hour, trying to decide what you wanted to say. How much did you want to admit? Was now the time to ask? Was there ever going to be a time?
“Did I do something?” You asked, eventually, deciding that if you ruined things, you could always just blame the drinks. Ryuki got away with saying a lot when he was drunk, so you supposed you could try the same excuse.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you treat me so differently than everyone else and I can't figure out why. I don’t remember doing something to make you keep me at an arm’s length, but there had to be something. So what am I missing? What did I do?”
Date looked surprised for a second, and for a moment you wondered if you were just imagining things. Maybe you just saw his regular behavior as rude because you wanted to be closer? Maybe it was all you after all?
“You didn’t do anything,” he said, after a little thought, “... It’s just complicated. And I’m not sure you want to hear the whole explanation.”
“Try me.”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. It took him a little bit before he spoke again, clearly mulling over how he wanted to say what he needed to say. He grabbed you hand before you realized it, pulling you along with him until you ended up somewhere quiet. Your head was still fuzzy enough that you weren’t sure how you got there. You were too focused on the hand gripping your own as he pulled you along. You assumed you had to have taken a cab, since you ended up far away from Marble. You weren’t sure where exactly you ended up, but it had to be Date’s apartment. You both sat on the couch, unsure what to say, until eventually he launched into an explanation.
He told you about who he was before he was Date. About Falco and the Kumakuras. About Hitomi and Iris and the little family that they started to build. He told you about Saito and Rohan and the bodyswapping that he was never supposed to talk about. You assumed that one was why he had dragged you away from Marble. It was stuff you had heard hinted at before around the office, but this was your first time hearing him lay it all out, and you hung on every word. This was the most Date had ever shared with you and you were not about to take that for granted.
He told you about his six years of amnesia, where he knew nothing about all of the things that he had just told you about. About the friends that he made. Taking in Mizuki after befriending Renju. And then he told you about the New Cyclops case. You knew the gist of the case, but the details were something you only really got to hear from Date, so you had never heard them before.
“Why are you telling me all of this,” you asked eventually, unsure of why you were getting all of this background. Unsure of what that had to do with you.
“I’ll get there. Just trust me,” He said. “Hitomi and I couldn’t get back together after all of that. She wanted to, but I wasn’t really the same person anymore. And I couldn’t risk putting her in danger like that again. I didn’t want to risk putting anyone in danger like that again. Iris, Hitomi, and Mizuki all almost died because they were close to me. And Renju and Shoko did.”
“You can’t blame yourself for that,” You said.
“Why not? I was the one that got Saito Sojima involved. And it was all because of Falco. Because I got too caught up in my idea of ‘justice’ that I got myself into trouble. And then I brought that trouble home,” He sighed. You weren’t sure if you had ever seen him be this vulnerable with anyone. It seemed odd, seeing the strong, confident Agent Date talk about himself like that. “I won’t let that happen again.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t want you getting close to me. I’m not a good person. There’s nothing I can do about Mizuki anymore besides make sure that she can defend herself, and Ryuki is too much like me to just let him go off on his own, but you’re different. You don’t need to be involved in my mess, and I’m certainly not worth it.”
“God, you’re stupid,” you blurted out before you could stop yourself. “You don’t get to choose if people like you just because you think you don’t deserve it. If you genuinely didn’t deserve it, you wouldn’t have to push people away to get them to not be close to you.”
“That’s probably the nicest reason I’ve been called stupid,” He chuckled. “But I’m really not worth the trouble.”
“Isn’t that up to me?” You asked. “Maybe I like trouble.”
“Alright, you’re definitely drunk.”
“Because I’m flirting with you?”
“Uh-huh. You need sleep. Mizuki is staying with a friend, so you can crash on the couch if you want.”
“Fine…” You sighed, admitting to yourself that you were starting to feel a bit tired. “But we’re talking about this later.”
“Sure,” You could tell that Date was hoping you’d forget by the morning, and you two could go back to your awkward tension.
But you wouldn’t. Now that you’d seen a hint of the real Date, of the reason that he treated you so coldly, there was no way in hell you were letting that go.
Some stupid AI company scraped a bunch fics off of AO3 to train their AI Model and I hope they also got all of the different AO3 author’s notes and their own program starts to guilt trip between raunchy A/B/O nonsense.
Anyway, AI is garbage and if you like my fics it’s because I’m a person and have real love for the things I write about. Don’t support this blatant theft.
Hey guys, turns out I have a SEVERE vitamin D deficiency. So I’ve been beyond exhausted. But I got some fuckin’ Vitamins so hopefully I’ll have energy to write again soon. My energy will probably be split between fanfic and the novel that I’m working on. If you might be interested in beta-reading my novel, feel free to shoot me a message!
If you folks are interested in some of my other writing, I’ll be posting about my novel that I’m working on on Bluesky. ANConrad on Bluesky. Otherwise, stay tuned in here for bigger updates!
Hey folks! It’s been a while. Being an adult fucking suuuuucks. But anyway, just so you all know, I’ve been writing a novel. You like detectives? Phantom thieves? Enemies to lovers? Oh and cool neurodivergent and LGBT fiction written by an actual LGBT and neurodivergent writer? Cool! You’re going to love Violet Roses! Especially if you’re already a fan of my writing here.
Currently no scheduled release date, but you guys will be some of the first to know any updates!
[Summary: Seven begins to act cold after he starts to stay with you for your own safety. However, it was too late to spare you from the heartbreak that he was sure you were doomed to. If only it didn’t take a physical form. A form that might kill you. (They/Them pronouns)
Warnings:Hanahaki Disease, Hurt/Comfort, blood,
Request: From my request survey (https://forms.gle/D9rsJtkERoBPaKvv8)]
Seven was so different since he’d started staying with you. He had been cold. He started avoiding you almost instantly. He’d snap at you any time you tried to talk to him. It was such a shocking change from how he was just a couple days before. You missed the quirky, high energy person you have been talking to earlier. But you were also so worried for the version of Seven that was right in front of you. People don’t just change like that for no reason. You had to wonder what was up.
If only you could focus on that, instead of the growing pressure in your chest. It was hard to help Seven when you felt your breathing slowly growing weaker. At first, you assumed it was just the stress getting to you. You were in danger. So much had changed in such a short time. And the man you had been falling for was suddenly treating you like he hated you. It was a lot to take in. It was no surprise that you were starting to feel a bit under the weather.
And then there was the cough. It seemed like your body was trying to rip something free from your lungs. The amount of force each cough held was ridiculous. Still, you refused to believe that there was anything more to it than a bit of stress. At least until the petals started to appear. Small, red stained petals appear in the tissues every time you had a coughing fit. Of course, you had heard of hanahaki disease. It was a rare condition, though. It felt unbelievable that it would happen to you.
Unrequited love taking physical form. Flowers sprouting in the lungs of each of the disease’s victims. The feeling of heartbreak when you feel like your love was doomed was bad enough, but the crushing feeling of foliage blooming in your chest only made things worse.
Of course, when you realized what you had, you knew exactly what happened. You had let yourself fall too hard for Seven too quickly. The quick explosion of emotion was bound to blow up in your face. Especially with Seven acting the way that he was. The coldness seemed to make the flowers grow faster. It was almost as though you could feel the roots dig deeper into your body every time Seven pointedly ignored you.
You knew that the only way to fix it was to confront the situation. Emotion clears away emotion. A solid, tangible heartbreak from a straightforward rejection was known to clear away the flowers that grew with hanahaki disease. That was what you expected to happen, at least. With the way Seven had begun to treat you, you knew there was no outcome besides rejection. However, the idea of confronting the issue made you feel guilty. It was clear that Seven didn’t want to talk to you. How selfish would it be to make him deal with that issue, considering everything else that he was dealing with? You couldn’t bear the thought of that conversation.
So you stayed silent, hoping the feelings would fade, taking the ever-growing flowers with them. Only, that wasn’t what happened. The flowers continued to grow, roots worming their way through the walls of your lungs, filling your breath with blood.
“Seven, have you eaten yet?” you asked timidly. It was one of the only things that you could bring yourself to talk to him about. He still hated the conversations, but you couldn’t help but care.
“I have some chips,” came his monotone response. He still didn’t look up from his computer.
“I can make you something if you’d li-” your offer was cut off with a coughing fit. You would normally go to get yourself a tissue, however, the force of each cough made it hard for you to move. You almost seemed to curl up into yourself as the fit progressed, your ribs screaming from the force.
Seven still didn’t look up at first. The coughing fits weren’t anything new, and you were sure that he thought it was just a cold or something. That was, until you dropped to the ground, your body no longer able to hold out under the force of each cough. You were coughing so hard that you seemed to just lose your balance completely. As you dropped to your knees, Seven finally raised his gaze away from the screen.
You weren’t sure what you expected, but it wasn’t the look of fear in his eyes as blood dripped past your lips. You didn’t expect him to set his laptop to the side, or rush over to you. You didn’t expect the hand on your back, or the one that guided you to the bedroom you had been staying in. And you certainly didn’t expect his shocked and angry reaction as he saw the pile of old, bloody tissues that had accumulated next to your bed.
“How long have you been this sick? Why didn’t you tell me? Do you have medicine? Do I need to bring you to the hospital? How could you not tell me?” The rapid-fire questions were hard to process. You hadn’t expected so much angry concern. You were completely unsure of how to respond.
“I-” you were cut off with another cough and another round of questioning from Seven. You didn’t get the chance to respond before he ran off to the bathroom, raiding the medicine cabinet for anything that might help. At least, with the assumption that this was some regular cough. You were thankful that he hadn’t seemed to notice the petals tucked away in each of the tissues that sat next to you. You still weren’t sure how you would explain the situation to him. At least if he thought it was just a bad cough, pneumonia maybe, he would stop worrying after a while. You hoped he would, at least.
“(Y/n), you need to take this,” he insisted, as he handed you the cough medicine that he had managed to find. You were thankful that there was something in that cabinet that hadn't expired. You knew that it wouldn’t do anything to help, but at least it might make him feel better. You hated seeing him worry, though it felt good to have his attention again. You just wished the circumstances were different. It was a bittersweet feeling.
“I’m sorry, Seven,” you managed to mutter out, your voice coarser than you had expected.
“I don’t know what you’re apologizing for. Just sleep,” he responded, still cold, but you wondered if there was something underneath the ice of his tone. You weren’t tired, but you couldn’t bring yourself to argue. So you closed your eyes and waited for sleep to set in.
- - - - -
“They’re sick. You need to let me have Jumin send a doctor,” you could hear the voice through the thick fog of sleep, though you couldn’t place it. The why and the who were lost on you as all context reminded clouded in drowsy fog. “No, V. This is serious. They’re coughing up blood. I can’t sit here and do nothing.”
You lay there listening for a moment as you collect your thoughts, pulling the rest of your brain back to reality. You had never heard Seven that upset before, even as he snapped at you for trying to drag him away from his work. And you certainly hadn’t heard him talk like that to V. He always seemed to speak to V as though he was some kind of savior. You didn’t know that full story of them, but you knew that this was new for Seven. And you didn’t know how to feel about it.
It was at the moment that another coughing fit announced your awakening. Seven hung up almost immediately, turning his attention to you quicker than you could have expected. He was by your side in an instant, trying to comfort you in any way he could. The soothing words felt odd in contrast to how he had been acting earlier. But the look in his eyes was so genuine. You wanted to savor the attention for a moment. Only for a flower to appear in your hand, red stained and entirely too revealing.
It felt like the world paused for a moment. Seven stared at the bundle of petals in your head, and you felt like you could feel the realization sinking in. Coughing up flowers could only mean one thing. Everyone knew that. And Luciel Choi was far too smart to be in denial about what he was seeing right in front of him.
Neither of you knew what to say at first. You had no clue how long the silence stretched on. It felt like an eternity and a second at the same time.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked in a heartbreaking whisper.
“I didn’t think you’d want to know,” was all you could think to say. The moment after stretched on for another emotion-soaked eternity. And then, before you could even notice him moving, his arms were around you.
You could feel him sobbing as he muttered apologies into your shoulder. You had never seen him so vulnerable. You wondered how many people were even alive that had. All you could do was run your hand through his hair, waiting for him to gather himself up enough to talk a bit more clearly. You knew that you needed to discuss the issue finally. You had put it off long enough. And now you had no other option.
“(Y/n), I’m not a good person. I’m not the person who deserves this from you. There are so many better people. You deserve so much better.”
“Is that you telling me that you don’t feel the same?” You ask. You needed a clear answer. At the very least, you could finally breathe again if you got a clear answer.
“No,” he said, “This is me trying to protect you. But I suppose that hasn’t been working out the way that I meant.”
He muttered the last part, his eyes drifting over to the stack of used tissues. It was clear that his attempt to save you from himself had only backfired. You didn’t need saving from him. You needed him.
“Seven, I love you. Tell me you feel the same way, please,” You had no idea when you got so bold, but maybe it was the look in his eyes that did it. Someone needed to take the reins. And you supposed that it would have to be you this time.
“I do,” he managed to choke out, though you could tell that he still felt unsure about letting you near him.
“Then we can work everything else out from here,” you told him. And you fully believed it. Everything you work out. You could already feel your lungs starting to clear up as you grabbed his hand. You just needed to work it out together. And now that you knew that he felt the same way, you weren’t about to let him push you away again.
[A/N: I'm definitely a bit rusty. Sorry for being MIA for so long. But hopefully, I'll get back on track soon enough.]
Hey, sorry for being MIA so long, friends. My mental health is… well, I write fanfiction on the internet, so I’m sure you can draw some conclusions (I promise this is a lighthearted joke). I’m hoping to get back to things asap, though.
I submitted post on the link. The google thing. And idk if it’s anonymous or not. If it isn’t plz don’t share it🙏🏻 i just found your account btw. Love it!
The request survey is fully anonymous, don’t worry!
Request: From my request survey (https://forms.gle/FpFyr84gPioVrW1Z9)
In a world with soulmates, I imagine that at some point Micah had a hard time believing that he would ever meet his soulmate. He was also concerned that if he did meet his soulmate, you wouldn’t like him.
Of course, he never made that obvious. When he did meet you and realized you were his soulmate, he acted as though it was obvious that you would fall for him. Even if he didn’t really believe it.
He’s honestly always shocked that he managed to find his soulmate. He considers himself incredibly lucky.
He isn’t really one to resist the concept of soulmates, especially if you impress him early on. He’d be happy to know that the universe thinks he has a chance with you.
He makes so many puns and jokes about fate and how you were destined to fall in love with him. They’re bad jokes, but it’s kind of endearing.
Micah will 100% panic sometimes when he starts to overthink the whole soulmate thing. He will definitely think of all of the worst case scenarios. He needs so much comfort. Remind him that you love him because of who he is, and not just because of fate.
Brags about his soulmate so much. He loves you. He’ll try to keep it to a level that you’re comfy with, but he can’t help himself. He wants everyone to know how lucky he is.
In a world with soulmates, I can only imagine the cheesy merchandise that has to do with soulmates. I guarantee he’d buy some of it. It’s probably awful.
Hi! I just wanted to let you all know that I turned on tips! Absolutely no pressure to tip at all, and I’ll still post as usual, but if you’d like to support me and my writing, feel free to send me something.
[Summary: Having a crush on your best friend sucked way more than TV made it seem. Maybe a night at the beach would help. Maybe even more than you had originally expected. (They/Them pronouns)
Warnings: Insecurity, Slight misunderstanding
Request: From my request survey! (https://forms.gle/D9rsJtkERoBPaKvv8)]
The beach had become a comfortable place for you throughout the years. It was familiar and calm most of the time. You had so many memories there that it almost felt like an extension of your home. Just like the hills behind your house that were always covered in poppies. However, the sound of the waves always helped you think, which was probably why the beach had become the place you wandered off to when you needed to process something.
You were having a bit of a crisis, after all. One that you really couldn’t trust your family to handle with any level of maturity. You knew they meant well, but they tended to tease. It was lighthearted, of course, but it still didn’t help. Not when you were trying to sort through your extremely conflicted emotions.
Falling in love with your best friend was unbelievably difficult. People often thought that it would be easy. You already knew each other. There was trust and affection there to build off of. But you had to work through the initial issues first. Change was terrifying. Especially when it came to something as important as your best friend. You wanted to think that your friendship wasn’t so fragile that a slight shift would shatter it, but you couldn’t be sure. Not really.
Cove Holden didn’t handle change well, after all. New things terrified him. And he had never been one to know how to accept affection without a bit of guidance. You didn’t want to just push your feelings on him out of the blue. Overwhelming him like that didn’t seem fair. But he also had a hard time picking up on hints. There was no way to be subtle about it that he would actually understand. You didn’t mind any of this about Cove, but it did make your dilemma a bit more challenging.
So that was why you had walked to the beach late at night. It was summer, so it wasn’t like you actually had anything to do the next day. And your parents had been a little less strict about your curfew, so you were free to stay out for a bit as long as you didn’t stray too far.
It was a nice night. The air had cooled off enough that you didn’t feel like you were going to melt the way you had earlier. in the day. The sky was clear, giving you a beautiful view of the stars. You tried your best to find the few constellations that you could remember from your astronomy lessons. It was quiet and calm, a stark contrast to your overactive mind. Still, you couldn’t manage to calm yourself down the way you normally would have.
Maybe that was because there wasn’t any clean solution. Eventually, you would have to take a risk if you wanted to resolve the situation. Your only options were to say something or to not. No amount of thinking would magically make a third option appear, and deep down you knew that. It was just a bit disappointing. You wanted there to be a solution that didn’t lead to a risk of you getting your feelings hurt. But things weren’t always that neat.
You were starting to think that it was time to head home when you heard something behind you. You tried your best not to look too startled as you turned around to see where the sound had come from. Sure, your town was peaceful, but it was tourist season. You never really knew who was around town during the summer. Your slight panic subsided as you met familiar green eyes and minty hair. The exact person you had just been thinking about. You almost wanted to laugh at the irony.
“What are you doing out here, Cove?” You asked, trying your best to hide any hint of the emotions still bubbling inside your brain. He wasn’t the best at reading people, but he had started getting pretty good at figuring out when you were in a bad mood.
“Uh,” he stuttered, a blush finding its way to his cheeks. He always flustered pretty easily, so you never read too deep into it. “I could ask you the same?”
You almost laughed at how unsure he sounded in his rebuttal. He always had such a cute way of handling himself when he was caught off guard, somewhere between nervous and standoffish. Unfortunately, him being cute was really only making your internal crisis worse.
“It’s peaceful out here. I needed a bit of alone time,” you eventually replied. You hated lying to him, so you chose to be vague instead. You knew it never worked, but you still tried.
“Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
You could tell from the pout on his face that he didn’t believe you. That he was trying his best to drop the subject since you clearly didn’t want to share. But that was never something that Cove could do. He always wanted to help, even when you didn’t exactly want him to. Luckily, you found it more endearing than frustrating.
Eventually he broke and asked, “Are you sure you’re alright? Please talk to me.”
You had a hard enough time saying no to him normally. The puppy-dog eyes that he shot you only made things harder. You knew you had to tell him what was going on eventually, but you still didn’t want to tell him everything. So you decided to continue being vague, even though you knew it wouldn’t actually help anything.
“Emotions are hard, you know?” You eventually laid back on the sand as you talked to him. He joined you, getting sand stuck in his hair. He never minded before, so you were sure he wasn’t about to start complaining about sand now.
“I know. Do you, uh,” he paused, turning away from you to face the sky as he continued talking, “do you want to talk about it?”
You laughed a bit, “Are you actually going to let me say no?”
“Of course!” He protested. He had a hard time letting things go, though. You were sure that he would try his best, but he would eventually end up prying. Even if he didn’t exactly want to.
“I’m just not sure if I should tell someone that I like him or not. We’re friends, and I don’t want to ruin anything. But it kind of sucks to keep it a secret,” you tried your best to pretend you were talking about someone else. You always trusted Cove with everything else. Maybe it would actually help to talk things through with him before coming to a decision.
“Oh,” for a moment he seemed shocked. And then he was quiet for a few more moments. You didn’t look at him, not sure what kind of expression you would find. When he eventually spoke again, there was a slight wobble to his voice that you couldn’t really identify. It almost sounded sad, but you were sure that couldn’t be right. “I think you should go for it. You deserve to be happy, and you aren’t going to be happy hiding the way you feel.”
“Yeah, I know. But I don’t want to ruin our friendship. I care a lot about him, so it would suck to make things awkward because of this.”
“I’m sure he likes you back. Derek’s had a crush on you for ages.”
“Derek?” You were a bit confused as to why Cove was bringing him up. You knew that Derek had a crush on you, after all. But you had already turned him down, citing your feelings for Cove.
“Is that… not who we’re talking about?” Cove seemed even more confused than you by the turn in the conversation. “He’s one of your closest guy friends, so I kind of assumed.”
“Um, no. I already talked to Derek about that. I’m not talking about Derek,” you replied, your face heating up a bit. You could feel the conversation getting closer to the point where you would have to tell Cove who exactly you were talking about. You just wanted to try your best to avoid it for a little longer.
“Then who are you talking about?”
There it was. The question you were trying your best not to answer. You knew it would come up eventually. And you knew that you couldn’t avoid answering it. You didn’t want to make Cove feel bad by denying him an answer. He would think you didn’t trust him anymore. And you couldn’t lie to him. You hated lying to him. It always made you feel guilty. So you braced yourself to answer the question, staring at the stars like you were hoping to float up there and join them.
“You, Cove.”
The silence that followed felt like it stretched for ages. You were conflicted all over again. This time the debate was about whether to look over at him or not. Did you want to see the face he was making? What could he possibly be feeling at that moment? Shock? Disgust, maybe? The thought was terrifying. But eventually you had to give in.
You found him staring at you with shock and wonder on his face. It was the “too good to be true” look. The look of surprise and disbelief that came with hearing something that you were almost sure you imagined, because there was no way you could actually get that lucky. For a moment, you actually felt a bit of hope, making you bold enough to say something.
“I really do like you, you know. More than like. I just really don’t want to freak you out with anything too sudden. You don’t have to say or do anything. It just feels better to say it.”
Of course, you wanted a response. Hopefully a good one. But you didn’t want to push. Making him panic was exactly what you wanted to avoid, after all.
“I, um,” his face was bright red by the time he started speaking. His voice was wobbling so much that you barely understood what he was saying at first. Eventually he cleared his throat and started speaking again, this time just a little steadier. “I really like you too. I don’t really know how to do this, though.”
“That’s alright,” you replied, a smile plastered to your face before you could think to stop it. “We’ll figure it out together. We always do.”
He nodded at that, a dorky smile to match your own forming on his lips. The starlit ocean behind you giving the perfect backdrop for the moment. It was calm and beautiful, exactly what Cove deserved, even though you didn’t plan it. You couldn’t help but go just a little further.
“Can I kiss you?”
He nodded, and that was all you needed to finally press your lips against his softly. It was worth every moment that you had spent pining over him. He smelled like seawater, poppies, and cheap body wash. And for that moment, you felt more at home than you ever had before.
General XOXO Droplets dating HCs with the Jerk Squad
For Nate, Everett, Shiloh, Bae, Pran, and Jeremy with a gender neutral reader!
[Warnings: None? I think? ]
Request: From my request survey (https://forms.gle/FpFyr84gPioVrW1Z9)
Nate Lawson
Nate Lawson cannot turn off the nagging no matter how hard he tries. You just kind of have to deal with it.
However, it does help sometimes. If you’re bad at remembering to do things or finding motivation, he’s actually a huge help.
If you can handle him being a bit blunt and rude, he helps a lot with studying too when he has the time.
His schedule is annoying as hell, let’s be honest. However, if you can convince him that it would be beneficial, you could probably get him to specifically schedule dates for you.
He’s probably always going to be a little uncomfortable with touch, but he finds plenty of other ways to show affection.
There are pros and cons to getting him to help you clean/organize. On one hand, it will be done really well. On the other hand, the process of getting it done will be SO stressful.
Truthfully, Nate is probably a really good boyfriend if you can deal with all of the stress. You just have to be willing to work with him.
He would definitely struggle with compromises, but he cares and he’s trying his best.
I have a feeling that he’s really used to people just writing him off as a perfectionist killjoy. He’d probably really appreciate someone who’s willing to understand him, even if you don’t agree with all of his opinions.
You do have to be able to get along with Everett a little. You don’t have to be best friends with him, but if you can’t stand to be in the same room as Nate’s best friend it just isn’t going to work.
Everett Gray
Judgey and snarky. I love Everett, but this guy uses his fake superiority complex to cope with his anxiety. You have to be able to deal with some snarky comments, and maybe even fire back a bit.
If you go shopping with him, he’s going to be incredibly picky about what you try. He’s trying to “help”, but he’s kind of a jerk about it. You might end up looking cool in the end, though.
Opposite of Nate when it comes to you needing help with things. Unless you want advice on how to seem “cool”, this guy is absolutely useless. He’ll be there for “support” though (he’ll sit and complain about being bored, but he’s still there).
Probably tried really hard not to tell his mom about you when you were first casually dating, but accidentally ruined his own plan but absentmindedly ranting. His mom probably thought it was really cute.
Shares his mom’s care packages with you. Don’t make a big deal out of it.
He probably starts getting little gifts for you after you start officially dating. He says he thinks it’s dumb, but I refuse to believe Mrs. Gray didn’t teach that boy any manners.
Has moods where he tries to push people away. Be stubborn. He needs stubborn. He may act annoyed, but he isn’t. He just loves to act annoyed.
Like with Nate, you do have to be able to tolerate his best friend. He’s not giving up his friend for you. Sorry.
Shiloh Fields
Honestly on the surface Shiloh would probably be a really good boyfriend, because he’s really good at doing/being exactly who you want. But is it genuine? Of course not. This is Shiloh we’re talking about.
It’s going to be a task to get anything real out of Shiloh, but I think if he genuinely cares about you, he’ll try. Of course, genuine for Shiloh just means that he’ll let you in on some of the scams he’s got going.
Shiloh’s probably never going to stop being a little manipulative, but he might be able to tone it down with you. He’ll keep it more in the “forgivable prank” and “joking lies” categories.
Shiloh loves horror so I’m confident he would be one of those guys that uses horror movies to get you to cling to him. He’ll definitely say things like “This movie isn’t that bad. Just a few jumpscares.” before putting in one of the scariest movies known to man.
It might seem like it would be helpful to be able to see through Shiloh’s lies, but I think that would make him uncomfortable.
He’d probably use his tricks to help you after a while. If you go to Shiloh about someone making you uncomfortable, he’ll deal with it. You don’t need to know how. It’s probably mostly legal, right? Maybe.
He doesn’t particularly care if you get along with other people. You do, however, have to be willing to let him continue with his scams.
Bae Pyoun
Bae is probably a decent boyfriend if you can actually get him to date you. He’s got high standards for everything. This can be to your detriment or benefit depending on how you look at it.
He’s not going to slack off on dating you. Of course, he expects the same, but at least you can tell that he cares, right?
I honestly doubt that he would refer to you by name basically ever. The nicknames just get more ridiculous.
I fully imagine that seeing him around kids is absolutely adorable. And then you have to take a second and realize that he treats just about everyone exactly the same way that he treats five year olds. You might be an exception sometimes, though.
He’s one of those people that “supervises” when you have to do something hard. By supervise, I meant that he watches and micromanages in the background. He’ll help a little if you really need it. Just don’t expect him to do any physical labor.
He’s one of those people that can manage to tell someone off without them really knowing how to react. If you tell him that someone is making you uncomfortable, they’ll probably end up too confused to keep bothering you.
He doesn’t really need you to get along with people, but you do have to handle it a certain way if you do dislike people. He’ll probably trash talk them with you, though.
Pran Taylor
Very much the “sit next to each other and do our own thing” kind of person. He likes to just sit next to you and draw while you do your own thing.
He isn’t going to go out of his way to do things with you, but at a certain point, he’ll just go along with what you want. He’ll probably continue to act annoyed about it, but you can definitely catch him smiling every once in a while.
Genuinely really protective, but I imagine he has like 500 excuses for why. He will not admit that it’s because he cares about you if he can avoid it.
I can distinctly picture that he would give you a drawing as a gift, but the way he would do it would be by crumpling it up and throwing it at you. The only reason you know that it’s for you is because there’s no way that Pran would litter.
Pran can almost certainly pick you up. You might even be able to convince him to carry you around. He honestly might find it kind of cute if you have a lot of fun with it.
You definitely have to get along with Jeremy a bit. Pran’s very protective, so he won’t tolerate you being genuinely mean to his friend.
Jeremy King
Jeremy is begrudgingly very cute. I feel like he hates that he genuinely wants to do cute things for you sometimes. He finds it so embarrassing.
He is a germaphobe and that does still apply to you. He does insist you wash your hands an insane amount before any physical affection.
His snappier side from when he was younger didn’t go away completely, but he does try his best not to snap at you. It’s not too hard, since he’s mostly apathetic, but it’s a struggle on occasion.
He definitely absentmindedly makes you gifts when he’s especially tired. He definitely won’t give it to you in person, though. It would be way too embarrassing for him.
He absolutely sucks at planning dates. He'll mostly go along with whatever you want, but he’ll really appreciate it if you make an effort to get him to enjoy it too. That’s not to say that he will enjoy it, just that he appreciates the effort.
His parents would probably love you regardless of who you are, and it annoys him so much.
He doesn’t exactly need you to be friends with Pran, but he’d get annoyed if you two fought too much. You have to at least tolerate Pran and get him to tolerate you.
[A/N: I was trying to use the wiki as a guide because it's been a little while since I played, but some of the boys have like nothing on their page. RIP me, I guess.]
[Summary: Micah takes it upon himself to distract you while you stress out about homework. (They/Them pronouns)
Warnings: None
Request: None, but you can request at my survey! I’m just… down bad. (https://forms.gle/D9rsJtkERoBPaKvv8)]
You had hoped that you’d be done with your school work before Micah’s visit. Most of your work, you could get done ahead of time. The classes were easy enough for you, so you could work a week or two ahead. That meant that you had more time to spend with Micah. He didn’t get the chance to visit all that often, so you didn’t want to waste any of the time you had on school work.
Unfortunately, there was one class that you just couldn’t get ahead of, no matter how hard you tried. You had hoped the poetry class wouldn’t be that much of a challenge when you signed up for it. However, it seemed you just couldn’t keep up with all the assignments. That was how you ended up pouring through your poetry books while Micah watched over your shoulder.
“Angel, I’m bored,” he whined, leaning on your shoulders as you tried to stay focused.
“And here I was, thinking that you just enjoyed spending time with me. I suppose that’s not enough for you anymore, huh?” You couldn’t help but tease him a bit, still not looking up from your book. The reading you were trying to do was due the next morning, and you still had to write up your analysis on it.
“Aw, that’s not fair,” he pouted. When you didn’t respond, he moved to sit across from you at the table. Honestly, you couldn’t help but think it was sweet that he wanted your attention so badly. You wanted to take a break from your homework too, but you truly didn’t have the time. “You know I enjoy just hanging out with you, but I was promised cuddles. I bought a whole plane ticket and everything.”
You couldn’t help but laugh a bit as he whined. You knew he was joking, but he was really giving the bit everything that he had. He could be ridiculously dramatic when he wanted to, and you had to admit it was endearing. “I promise you’ll survive until I finish with this, you dork. I just have to get this done, and I should be done for the week.”
“Ugh, can’t you just cheat? I thought you said that was what you normally did,” he was getting more and more dramatic with every moment. You could vaguely see his golden puppy-dog eyes staring at you in the edge of your vision.
“That was a joke, idiot. Besides, shouldn’t you be used to sitting around like this? I doubt this is as boring as your 8 hour study sessions,” you looked up just long enough to stick your tongue out at him, earning a chuckle that always seemed to make your heart melt. “Speaking of, if you wanna help me out with the analysis for this, it would probably do more for you than all that pouting.”
“I don’t know,” he replied, drawing out the words in a way that told you he was about to say something absurd. “That seems unfair to all of your classmates. I’m kind of a genius when it comes to poetry, after all. You don’t want to make them all feel stupid, do you?”
“I mean, a bit,” you responded, unable to hide the smile forming on your lips, “but I’m really not all that worried about that.”
“What, you don’t believe that I’m a poetry god? A master wordsmith? You dare doubt me?”
“Oh, no, of course not,” your words were dripping with sarcasm as they left your mouth, “I’m sure you’re just a modern day Shakespeare.”
“I don’t know, Angel. It sounds a bit like my wonderful partner is doubting my abilities,” you hadn’t even realized that he had stood up from the chair. You were far too focused on trying to get your work done. You probably should have known better than to think Micah Yujin wouldn’t use the opportunity to fluster you.
“No comment.”
“Oh, Angel, you wound me,” his voice was much closer, finally catching your attention. You looked up from your books, only to find him kneeling next to you, his face much closer to your own than you expected. You knew he was enjoying the banter because the sparkle in his eyes didn’t fade for a second.
You tried distracting yourself, looking at his hair instead of the mischievous look in his eyes. The chunky white stripes in his hair were a signature look of his. You could barely imagine what he would look like without them. Still, you could tell that it had been a little while since he had touched them up because his roots were growing out a bit. However, you couldn’t help but to look back at his face after a moment or two, meeting his cocky grin that always put his fangs on full display. You just had to hope the blush wasn’t noticeable yet.
“Can I help you, Micah?” You asked, keeping your voice as steady as you possibly could.
“Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day, Angel?” He moved a hand to rest on your cheek, and you were sure that he could feel the heat pouring off of your cheeks. You never understood how his voice could have such an effect on you. He never failed to make you weak in the knees with just his words alone. Not that you were going to tell him that. You would never live that down and you knew it.
Instead, you just looked at him, trying to keep a straight face as he stared directly into your eyes. You didn’t trust your voice with a response. The last time he had caught you stuttering because of him, he teased you about it for a week. He only stopped because you pointed out all the times he had done the same thing. Still, you decided that avoiding that teasing would be much easier than finding a way to distract him afterwards. So you just raised an eyebrow at him in response, trying your best to seem entirely unimpressed.
“Because you’re hot as fuck.”
It took you a second to process, the sudden change in tone catching you a bit off guard. However, once you finally wrapped your head around what he had said, you couldn’t help but burst into laughter.
It was the ugly, absurd laughter that often came when he caught you off guard with a joke. The kind that only he had ever really earned. It always seemed to make him smile, but your eyes were too watery for you to see the dopey, love-struck look on his face.
“Micah Yujin, that was terrible,” you said between giggles. You were still gasping for breath, but you felt as though you had to say something or you’d never manage to calm down.
Honestly, you hadn’t even realized how tense you were getting about your school work until that moment. Until the tension was shaken from your shoulders with each laugh. Until you finally felt relaxed as you slowly caught your breath. It was at that moment that you realized Micah hadn’t been trying to get you to take a break because he wanted your attention. He wanted you to take a break for yourself.
“Micah Yujin, you absolute dork,” you sighed, leaning your face into his hand that had returned to your cheek. You and Micah might tease each other constantly, but it was moments like that when you were reminded just how caring Micah really was. And you were eternally grateful to have him. However, the only way you could think to express it was a simple, “Thank you.”
He seemed to get the message, though, if the soft kiss he pressed to your forehead was anything to go by.
[A/N: This is shorter than my usual stuff, but hey, at least I've started getting over my writer's block. At least a little bit.]
