Welcome to the Rodeo

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN TO ME AGAIN

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

unsure if you remember me (and it's okay if you don't!), but i hope you're doing well!!!

🖤💫

Awww I do remember you! I hope you’re doing well too ❤️ I’ve been doing good! I graduated college and trying to navigate the world which is super weird hahaha

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

I want to start writing again but I honestly have no idea what to write

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Obey Me Boys as Lana Songs  Ultraviolence Edition

I’ve seen a few posts like this with Taylor Swift songs and I am a HUGE Lana Del Rey fan so I wanted to do it to! I’m going to try and do all her albums

Creds: I saw yamanorakuen and therwitingmagician2022 do them for T Swizzle and loved them! so I got my inspo from their posts!

Lucifer

Ultraviolence

This is ultraviolence Ultraviolence Ultraviolence Ultraviolence I can hear sirens, sirens He hit me and it felt like a kiss I can hear violins, violins Give me all of that ultraviolence

Lucifer is the definition of this song. Loving him is scary, hard, but also thrilling. He’s the avatar of pride and he lives up to that title. Being with him means choosing him and no one else. 

Mammon

Brooklyn Baby

They say I'm too young to love you They say I'm too dumb to see They judge me like a picture book By the colors, like they forgot to read I think we're like fire and water I think we're like the wind and sea You're burnin' up, I'm coolin' down You're up, I'm down You're blind, I see

This song just screams him for some reason. It’s fun, it’s cute, and the two of you would definitely dance to it in his room. Just imagine singing the “yeah my boyfriend’s pretty cool, but he’s not as cool as me.” part to him and him getting pouty.

Levi

Black Beauty

I paint the house black My wedding dress black leather too You have no room for light, love is lost on you I keep my lips red To seem like cherries in the spring Darling, you can't let everything seem so dark blue But oh, what can I do? To turn you on or get through you?Oh, what can I do? Life is beautiful, but you don't have a clue Sun and ocean blue Their magnificence, it don't make sense to you

Levi doesn’t understand why you choose him. He doubts himself so much. This song is almost like you trying to tell him that he needs to stop putting himself down because you love him and you will always choose him. 

Satan

Sad Girl

Watch what you say to me Careful who you're talking to Watch what you say to me Careful who you're talking to I'm on fire, baby I'm on fire

He's got the fire And he walks with it He's got the fire And he talks with it

I feel like being with Satan is a power move. He’s a romantic, he’s a gentleman, but most importantly he’s the avatar of wrath. I feel like the chorus fits him. He wouldn’t let anyone hurt you. People have to watch what they say and do to you because you have him in your corner. 

Asmo

The Other Woman

The other woman has time to manicure her nails The other woman is perfect where her rival fails And she's never seen with pin curls in her hair, anywhere.The other woman enchants her clothes with French perfume The other woman keeps fresh cut flowers in each room There are never toys that's scattered everywhere

This is easily Asmo’s song for many reasons. In the past he has definitely been the other woman time and time again. I mean, come on, he has canonically ruined peoples lives by dating him. Like that lady in the painting. This song is almost like a warning to be careful getting involved with him.

Beel 

Old Money

But if you send for me, you know I'll come And if you call for me, you know I'll run I'll run to you, I'll run to you I'll run, run, run I'll come to you, I'll come to you I'll come, come, come Oh-oh oh, oh-oh ohThe power of youth is on my mind Sunsets, small town, I'm out of time Will you still love me when I shine From words but not from beauty

Beel is a protector and he will protect you. He will be there when you need him. He loves you and will not fail you. He’s your guardian and teddy bear. Just say the word and he will be there.

Belphie

Cruel World

I shared my body and my mind with you That's all over now I did what I had to do I found another anyhow Shared my body and my mind with you That's all over now I did what I had to do I could see you leaving now

I see this from Belphie’s point of view. He “shared” himself with you (he lied and manipulated you) to get you to free him. He did what he thought he had to do to get what he wanted. In the end, he hurt you, himself, and his brothers. 

Diavolo

Money, Power, Glory

The sun also rises on those who fail to call My life, it comprises of losses and wins and fails and falls I can do it if you really, really like that I know what you really want, b-baby I can do it if you think you like that You should run, boy, run

Diavolo has all three thrings: money, power, and glory. He is literally a prince and that comes with dangerous territory. As a prince he will make calls that make people happy and also make people mad. Being with him means sacrifice and you will be with him through every rise and fall.

Barbatos

Pretty When You Cry

Don't say you need me when You're leaving, you leave again I'm stronger than all my men Except for you Don't say you need me then You live last, you're leaving I can't do it, I can't do it But you do it best'Cause I'm pretty when I cry, I'm pretty when I cry Pretty when I cry, I'm pretty when I cry Pretty when I cry, I'm pretty when I cry I'm pretty when I cry I'm pretty when I cry

Barbatos has loyalty to Diavolo. If he is called upon, he will leave you to do his duties. I feel like pretty when you cry essentially sums up what it would be like to be with him. You have to deal with him not always being there and leaving you when he has to attend his duties. His loyalty to Diavolo comes first.

Simeon

West Coast 

You push it hard, I pull away, I'm feeling hotter than fire I guess that no one ever really made me feel that much higher Te deseo, cariño, boy, it's you I desire Your love, your love

I can see my baby swinging His Parliament's on fire and his hands are up On the balcony and I'm singing Ooh, baby, ooh, baby, I'm in love I can see my sweet boy swaying He's crazy y cubano como yo, la-la On the balcony and I'm saying Move, baby, move, baby, I'm in love

The man Lana sings about in this song just reminds me of Simeon. He’s an angel and loving him almost feels forbidden. He’s said before that he would be willing to fall if it meant being with you. He is beautiful and kind and ethereal. His fate is in your hands.

Solomon

Shades of Cool

My baby lives in shades of cool Cold heart and hands and aptitude He lives for love, for women too I'm one of many, Bonnie's blue And when he calls, he calls for me and not for you He prays for love, he prays for peace, and maybe someone new

He is shady. A shady sorcerer. He’s lived so long it’s questionable to even call him human. But, he loves you in his own odd way. He teases you, he flirts with you, he wants to be yours. He wants you to see beyond the veil and love him. Just love him and all his shadiness. 

[neverwonderneverremember-deacti]

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Why is this Belphie

[midnightsunnyday]

*stands on podium* to the artist who draws Lucifer with the gray DILF streak. I don't know who you are, but thank you. Your service is appreciated.

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Late Night Drive With Lucifer

GN!Reader x Lucifer

set outside the Obey Me universe so like human AU i guess??

TW/CW: Suggestive at the end? I don’t proofread

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You should have known better than to ride with Asmo to a party when it usually always ended with him wanting to stay longer while you were ready to go home. Your feet hurt, your clothes felt too tight, and you were beyond over the pounding music. 

“Please! Just a few more minutes!” Asmo pleaded with puppy dog eyes.

“You said that an hour ago! You promised that when I said I wanted to go we would leave.” You couldn’t fight the irritation that was beginning to bubble up inside. “I can’t just keep bumming rides off your brothers or paying for a taxi.” You failed to notice Lucifer walk up behind you before he interjected.

“I can drive you home.” 

You both turned your heads to see Lucifer standing behind you. 

“Thank you, Luci~!” Asmo squealed before running off, disappearing back into the sea of people.

Your relationship with Lucifer was complicated to say the least. You couldn’t deny your attraction for the raven haired man. He was everything you could have dreamed of: tall, handsome, responsible, mysterious. You were close to his brothers, but he always seemed to keep you at a distance. He would let you in for a moment before shutting down and acting like it never happened. The mixed signals were frustrating, especially when he seemed to keep his eyes on you the entire night. Every time you would catch his eyes you would turn the other way to hide your flushed face. Something about him seemed different tonight. He stayed by Diavolo’s side the entire night but every time you looked at him his eyes were trained on you. 

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” You looked everywhere but his face.

“I wouldn’t have walked over here if I didn’t want to. I was about to leave anyways, come on, let’s get going.” You couldn't help but be flustered at the hand that rested on the small of your back as he guided you through the crowd. As you stepped outside, you were hit with the drastic temperature difference. You grabbed your arms to keep yourself warm. You heard a chuckle and looked up to see Lucifer smirking down at you. He began taking his coat off. Despite your protest, he draped his suit jacket over your shoulders. Your whole body became warm as his cologne flooded your senses. 

“Its cold out. I can’t have you getting sick now.” You felt butterflies fill your stomach as you followed him across the parking lot to his car. You were mentally preparing yourself for the car ride. It would be one of the few rare times that you would be completely alone with him. As the two of you reached his car, he opened the door for you and gestured for you to get in. Goosebumps spread across your body as the cold leather seat met you skin. You shamelessly wrapped his jacket closer around your body. As he got in and started the car you couldn’t help but smile as the radio began playing. The radio was set to a classical music station. You let out a giggle as you settled back against the seat.

“Whats so funny?” He quirked an eyebrow at you as he put his seatbelt on.

“Oh, nothing. I just think it’s funny you listened to classical music on the way to a club.” As he pulled out of the parking lot the two of you sat in silence, the only noise being the music softly playing on the radio. Something about the moment seemed so intimate. You began wracking your brain for something, anything to say to break the silence.

“You looked beautiful tonight. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you.” The words broke you out of your thoughts. Your heart hammered as you registered his words.

“You could have approached me.” You replied quietly.

He looked ethereal illuminated by the red glow of the stoplight. You couldn't help but mess with your fingers as you felt the tension in the air stick to your skin. You tried to sneak another glance at him only to be met with his gaze.

“You seem nervous.” His piercing red eyes seemed to bore a hole through you. Your mouth felt dry as you tried to think of a response. You felt small under his gaze.

“Why would I be nervous?” You gave a weak laugh as you avoided his gaze.

“You seemed to avoid me all night.” He hummed as he turned his eyes on the road. You couldn’t let this opportunity pass. This was your shot to try and get your foot in the door to open it.

“Because I’m trying to figure out what you want.” You watched as a brief look of confusion flashed across his face. “You’re so hot and cold. You’ll dodge any personal questions I ask you but then you’ll stare at me all night. What do you want from me?” You crossed your arms and looked out the window at the passing lights.

“I know what I want, but I want to make sure that you know what you’re getting into.” You swallowed thickly as you reached the destination. As he put the car in park, he leaned across the console to grab your chin. His thumb ghosted across your bottom lip as he turned your head to face him. “I’m not like my brothers. You’ll be mine, and no one else’s. So, what do you want?” He whispered, inches from your face. You knew you had two options. You could get out of the car and throw away any possible chance with him, or you could be honest.

“You.” As the words left your mouth, his lips were on yours. 

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

MY BABY CAME HOME FIRST PULL CRYING SHITTING PISSING MYSELF

[fluffimemes]

Asmodeus: I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate, malewife our way out of this one, boys.

Satan, cracking his knuckles: Manslaughter it is, then.

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Can you do a story about Barbatos and Diavolo falling in love with F!MC? Btw I love your stories!!

This is kinda short so I apologize! I wanted to try a style I’ve never wrote in before.

------

When you're the royal butler of the crowned prince of the Devildom, you have to sacrifice a multitude of things. You sacrifice your time, your hobbies, and most importantly, you have to sacrifice being with the one you love. 

Barbatos couldn't quite pin when he had fallen for you. It started off slowly, then it seemed to happen all at once. Maybe it was the way your eyes lit up when he presented you with whatever dessert he had made for the day, or how heartwarming it was when you acted protective of Luke. All he knew was that he saw you in a new light. He was captivated by you and he wanted nothing more than to bask in your presence. He found himself texting you more, inviting you to tag along when he went to the market, and finding excuses to randomly gift you with sweets. 

Diavolo knew the moment he fell for you. He could recount every single moment that you made his heart swoon. You didn’t treat him like he was royalty, you treated him like a friend. You made him feel normal. When he was around you he didn’t have to keep up the facade of a prince. Around you, he could be himself.

Barbatos knew that Diavolo had feelings for you. He could see it in the way he held his hand against the small of your back when he walked beside you, the way he leaned into you when he spoke to you, and most importantly, the way his entire being seemed to light up when you walked into a room. You seemed to be over at the castle more and more. One day you were there for tea with Diavolo, the next you were baking with Barbatos. 

Just as Barbatos knew about his lords feelings towards you, Diavolo knew the same about Barbatos. He saw it in the way he would linger around you when he poured your tea, how he always seemed to stand closer to you when the two of you baked. It left him feeling odd. Diavolo knew that he had the power to order Barbatos to stop pursuing you, but he was his friend. He would never dream of stooping so low. When Barbatos had you over, Diavolo would make himself scarce. When Diavolo had you over, Barbatos would do his duty then rereat to the kitchen. It was an unspoken rule. They both could sense what the other was doing.

Barbatos had tried to hide his own feelings for the sake of his lord, but when you turn and flash him your smile, he falls in love all over again. He couldn't help falling in love with you just as Diavolo couldn't either. Both knew there would come a time when they would have to confront the issue, but for now, they just wanted to enjoy their time with you.

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

I have OCs. Eleven of ‘em, in fact. But I don’t draw, I just use Gacha Club T.T

(Yes call me childish idc xD)

Don't worry, I go to picrew and make them haha. I have a handful for obey me. If you ever want to talk about OCs hit me up B) i love hearing about them

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Obey Me! Masterlist

Obey Me!

All Brothers

Bros with an MC with a weird sleep schedule

MC being scared of the brothers

Everyone 

Everyone with a witch hunter MC

Lucifer

College HCS

Mammon

With a fairy MC

College HCS 

Leviathan

With a fairy MC

College HCS

Satan

College HCS

Asmo

With a fairy MC

College HCS

Beel

College HCS

Belphie

College HCS 

Diavolo

Diavolo crushing on you

Cat and Mouse Part 1 / 2

College HCS

Barbatos

College HCS

Simeon

College HCS

Solomon

College HCS

Obey me college AU

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Thought of dis while in da shower: bros reacting to an MC dat is even shadier than da sorcerer when it comes to their sleep schedule-

Lucifer

Listen, he can't say anything about anyone's sleep schedule

Man is known to overwork himself

There's a chat pic of him asleep at his desk with a pen in his hand

The moment he tries to scold you about your bad sleep habits you just have to hit him with the, "oh yeah? Let's talk about YOUR sleep habits."

Uno reverse

He'd be speechless (and honestly offended)

He’d just stare at you in silence

On a more serious note, He would be a little worried

Humans need their sleep to be able to function. Please stop adding more stress to this man

Mammon

I just know he would flip over your schedule because he’s so protective over you

Definitely send you texts like, “you better be asleep you human!” 

He attempts to lecture you about it but its Mammon we’re talking about. It’s just him being like go to sleep. Just sleep. Come on, go to sleep.

He tries to make you coffee in the morning to keep you awake during the day

Will offer to let you stay with him during the night 

Levi

He stays up watching anime and gaming

I feel like he also has a bad sleep schedule 

Probably uses it to his advantage to try and get you to game with him

You’re already wide awake? Why not come game or watch anime?

He texts you more at night because he knows you’re most likely still up and he needs someone to ramble to 

 Satan

Will offer to read to you to help you fall asleep

Will read some sleep guides to see if he can find anything to help you fall asleep

Definitely gives you tips and tricks he has read to see if it’ll help

Makes you tea at night

Will definitely tease you about your sleep schedule

Asmo

Do you know how bad that is for your skin?

He stays on your case about your sleep schedule

He wants you to always be looking and feeling your best

He pesters you about your sleep schedule constantly

I feel like he would text you when it was bed time and tell you to go to sleep

Buys you products that are supposed to help with sleeping

Expect a lot of lavender scented things

Buys you face masks that help with dark circles and puffiness because a bad sleep schedule can cause bad skin

Beel

Because he works out and plays fangol, I feel like he has a pretty decent sleep schedule (minus him waking up to get food)

He would be slightly concerned because he knows sleep is important

Would invite you to work out with him to see if maybe it will make you sleepier at night

If he sees your light on during one of his late night snack runs he’ll drop in and eat with you

Belphie

Another one that can’t really say anything about your sleep schedule whenever his is even more odd

Idk if this is canon but I had read somewhere that because he sleeps during the day its hard for him to sleep at night so going off that I feel like if you stayed up late into the night he would try and convince you to lay with him as an attempt to get the both of you to sleep at night

if that doesn’t work then you two are nap buddies for during the day because you’re gonna crash at some point and he wants cuddles

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

CHILDBIRTH ANON: i watched a documentary about medieval royal harems, and a senior concubine had become pregnant soon after the protagonist was released from punishment. however, someone had severely increased the dosage of medicine she was using, which caused the fetus to grow unnaturally large. the child was absorbing a harmful amount of blood from the concubine, which is why she was eating so much at the time. maybe that could also apply to demons because everyone is so tall?

Yeah I could see that. I feel like magic would also play a huge part in it like maybe the fetus also absorbs the mothers nutrients, blood, and magic. Plus where their life spans are so incredibly long I wonder how that effects how long the mom stays pregnant. Like I wonder if that makes them stay pregnant longer

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Just wait until the bros hear about the horrors of human childbirth-

I’ve always wondered how childbirth works for in the devildom bc it stated at some point that Diavolo’s mom died during childbirth. Like I wonder if it’s similar to how human childbirth with the risks and all

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

You know, I just watched a C-Drama and a character named Liu Xigua was introduced in episode 16 (pronounced Li-yu She-guaa). I thought that it kind of sounded like Lucifer, until I remembered that Xigua is the Mandarin word for watermelon-

Imagine walking around HOL and just calling him watermelon out of the blue. He’d be so confused. HAHAHA SEE HIM AND SAY “watermelon sugar, hi!” And then running away at your pun

[a-very-bizarre-adventure]

Not me searching for my headphones only to realize I have been wearing them for the past hour-

HAHAHA that’s literally me when I’m driving and searching for my sunglasses only for them to be on top of my head. Relatable bestie