sweet in your memory

ajax arlington. thirty-one. and lot’s wife, of course, was told not to look back where all those people and their homes had been. but she did look back, and i love her for that, because it was so human

[aarlingtons]

"betrayal" + selene

it feels rather as though he’s been shot. a slug right to the stomach. not the heart, not the head. those would be too simple, too direct. a sawn-off shotgun pointed right at his belly and fired. once, twice maybe. a spray of pellets. it feels like being torn, ripped open. muggle weapons have a blunt, indelicate way of dealing out pain that magic lacks. there is nothing elegant about the way she appears to him now. nothing mystical or whimsical about the truth she is part of. “so. it’s all just a lie? nothing is true - none of it?” he’s disgusted, and he may be an actor, but there is nothing hidden in his voice now. nothing false. this is, perhaps, the closest he’s ever come to pure hatred. the words feel like rot as they cascade from him, and it’s wrong, but it is true. it is what she has earned from him, after all of this. “fuck you, selene. you are so, so much worse than even you think you are. and i know you hate yourself. i can see it.” he doesn’t know if he’s right, but it feels right. she must hate herself. she has to, if she’s still human. “i can see all of it, now. all of you. and you’re nothing but a sick, pathetic coward. and your hand is in all of it. every single part of that evil - you did it. you let it happen. you disgust me.”

[aarlingtons]

“Something happened today.” (Rosa)

something. the word itself is ominous, and his heart immediately stutters in a sharp, radiating ache. it drifts throughout his chest. his throat closes up, and all he can think to do is to reach out, hand hanging numbly in idair, halfway between them. her family? her parents? there were targets on their backs. on his back, but more so on hers. all because she sought to do good. all because she was the best of them, of anyone. he swallows, and pushes words out through the block. “something?” he asks, and his hand finds home, clasping onto her shoulder. “rosa, are you okay? is everything - is everyone okay?” he asks quietly, guiding them both towards the couch, preparing himself for something terrible, hoping against all hope that he’s only overreacting. “please - tell me.”

[aarlingtons]

❝ that wasn’t meant for you. ❞ - selene

he’s not sure what to make of it - not sure, really, what to make of selene at all. she’s always evaded him, his understanding. once, ajax had thought he could read people pretty well. good or bad, interesting or boring, polite or genuine... but the longer the war stretches on, the harder it’s becoming. he looks at her, probably for a few seconds too long, trying to work out a response. slowly, his trademark grin fades, until his face is serious. it’s not an expression he’s used to. “okay,” he says it slowly. like she’s testing him. a small frown crinkles between his brows. concern. for her or for hiself, he’s not sure - the former, probably. he’s never been great at self-preservation. “and if it was meant for me - i mean, if you were going to say something, to me, for me - what would it be? how different would you make it?” he’s not sure even what he’s saying. ajax laughs at his own idiocy, and looks down. “jesus. you’re confusing, you know that? i can’t work you out, not for anything. i feel like - and i know this is rich, coming from me - i feel like you’re always putting on an act. so just be real with me, for a minute. if it wasn’t meant for me, then what was meant for me?”

[aarlingtons]

thirdwars​:

“Well, while you do bring out the non-asshole in me, I think you would.” It’s a compliment, that comes out a bit oddly, and she flashes him a quick smirk. Sometimes she thinks that a combination of their worldviews would be the ideal, but she has never managed to get there herself. Especially not as of late. “Oi, don’t call yourself a coward. Yer just … nice, which sounds really shitty, but it’s true, and it’s a good thing. But you’ll find something, I’m bloody sure ––– and fuck, the muggle theatre would be so good. None of that war shit tainting it either, right?”

ajax laughs. “why, ‘cause i’m just too nice to see it?” he knows she’s probably right - he wouldn’t see it. ajax isn’t sure if it’s because he’s incapable of seeing anything as purely evil, or just willfully blind to it. he smiles. “oh, but i am - if i’d have gone to hogwarts, that hat would’ve known it immediately. no gryffindor for me.” he looks down. it’s not that he’s scared of not finding something - there’s a war, going on, after all. the arts might have to wait. it’s simply that he’s not normally one to back out of commitment. “no. but they’ve got their own issues.”

[aarlingtons]

thirdwars​:

Ajax humbles her sometimes; he, a romantic, and she such a cynic. She smiles a little, at how he approaches the situation, endeared. “Well, then don’t be an asshole ‘bout it. I’m not good at giving advice on that one, though.” Her smile becomes a bit guilty, then. “Right, okay, let’s just forget all my ideas. They’re not it. Aren’t there any potions that turn you into a fantastic singer, or something?”

“aw, c’mon, if you were an asshole all the time do you really think i’d hang out with you?” he grins, shaking his head. she’s not right about herself: she’s not an asshole, and she’s normally right. ajax just wishes she didn’t have to be - he’d rather see the world as a place of hope than a boxing ring. “no, no, you’re right. i need to quit. i’m the one being a coward. i’ll find something else to do for the next three months - hell, i could try get myself into the muggle theater. that’d be something.”

[aarlingtons]

darling, this was just as hard as when they pulled me apart ( rosa )

he’s not used to real feelings - ajax is accustomed to simplicity and happiness, a stupid joke or a competition. he’s played real problems, he’s faked real tears. but he’s lived a charmed enough life not to know what it’s like, truly, to hurt. “oh,” he says quietly, wrapping an arm around her and squeezing. “rosa.” he knows how to be there, physically, to hug her close and let her cry, or hurt. but he hasn’t a clue what to say. “babe, i’m sorry. it’s okay. you’ve got me. i’m right here.”

[aarlingtons]

thirdwars​:

“I mean, do you want it? If you don’t, just … don’t fuckin’ do it. Honesty’s the best policy, if y’ask me.” She shrugs, as if it’s very simple. “Feel free to utilise me as an excuse, though. Tell them I had a family crisis again, or something, or there’s an emergency at RED. You’ll get those neat empathy points.”

“if i could sing, i’d love the part. it’s actually really, really good. better than most of the ones i get, you know. but i’d be an asshole if i didn’t step down.” he knows it should be simple. but he’s always hated disappointing people. “right, ‘cause that’ll do wonders for the whole ‘stop the world from thinking we’re together’ thing.”

[aarlingtons]

thirdwars​:

“Ajax. Ajax. Here’s how you do it. You call him up, you say: ‘hey, mate, love the offer, but I’m totally tone deaf’, and then maybe offer to help find a replacement because of your exquisite network and hang the fuck up. It’s not that hard to say no. Just one syllable, really.”

he sighs. “but he really, really wanted me for the part! and i can't let him down like that - he’ll think i just don’t want it, or something. what i was thinking, right - i get mysteriously, deeply sick. lose my voice, even. solves the problem!”

[aarlingtons]

“so they’ve asked me to sing for this new thing, some musical comedy, or whatever, and i just don’t know how to tell the director that i’m completely and utterly tone deaf. and we start rehearsals next week.”

[blishwix]

“Alright, I’ll concede — Quodpot is a pretty stupid sport. Now that that’s out of the way, I figure it’s time I embrace the quidditch fever that’s rampant around here. So give me your best sales pitch for which team you consider to be the best in the league. I’m going to need someone to root for and I’m taking suggestions.”

[aarlingtons]

“well i, for one, would recommend the cannons or the kestrals.” ajax replies, feigning utter and innocent sincerity without a fault. “great teams, long and storied histories...” despite having played for both, he couldn’t possibly tell you what the histories were, of course. “there’s also the fact that they were my teams, but that’s no matter.”

[aarlingtons]

{ cismale, he/him } ❝ and lot’s wife, of course, was told not to look back where all those people and their homes had been. but she did look back, and i love her for that, because it was so human. ❞ huh, who’s ROBERT PATTINSON? no, you’re mistaken, that’s actually AJAX ARLINGTON. he is a THIRTY-ONE year old MUGGLEBORN wizard who is A RETIRED SEEKER ACTOR.

he is a BEAUXBATONS alum and the child of DARREN and CLEO ARLINGTON. he is known for being FOOLISH, CLOYING, OVEREAGER, EMOTIONAL, and WAYWARD but also TALENTED, HARDWORKING, OVER-ATTACHED, CURIOUS, and HUMOUROUS, so that must be why pronoun always reminds me of the song CANYON MOON by HARRY STYLES, and

THE ACHE OF A ROMANTIC CHILDHOOD GONE AND IRRETRIEVABLE;

PAGES FADING AT THE CORNERS FROM OVERUSE;

BOOMING LAUGHTER IN A QUIET RESTAURANT;

MESSY HAIR AND A FRAYING SHIRT;

A MAN WHO BRINGS SUMMER EVEN IN A SNOWSTORM;

THE CHIDING OF ELDERS AND PEERS MET WITH AN EMBARRASSED GRIN AND EYES THAT BETRAY A LACK OF REGRET;

BURNING SUNLIGHT AND EMOTIONS TWICE AS BRIGHT.

i hear he is aligned with THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX, so be sure to keep an eye on him.

ajax is born into a perfectly quaint, perfectly clueless muggle family. his father an english teacher, his mother a french-born nurse, he grows up in new jersey of all places, surrounded by love, and about as far from magic as one could get. until, of course, one day he isn’t.

his magic begins to surface when he’s nine - invisible coincidences at first, then sparkles in the air when he smiles, when he is filled with excitement and delight. ajax has always been a hopeful, happy boy - and his magic shows as much.

his parents, lost and yet ecstatic at the talent of their boy, and deciding that a fresh start for all would work best, promptly pack up and move to nice, france. his grandparents live there, and their family grows stronger in their love and attachment the moment they move.

his years at beauxbatons blow by in a blur - he learns, but only so far as his love for people and socialising and above all quidditch allow him. he spends much of his time performing, however - a loud, popular teen, he was known for elaborate performances for his teachers, his comically average french spurring him on to great infamy

he graduates with a contract offered to him by both the chudley cannons and the kenmare kestrels - largely clueless to britain, and to british quidditch, but with few other plans for his life, he chooses the cannons, and leaves france behind just as he had new jersey. his parents, ever loving, ever devoted, move with him.

he stars in their development team for two seasons, spurred along by his carefree personality and growing fame off the pitch

adding to this, of course, is his propensity to fall in love often, and fast, and he finds himself splattered across tabloids for dating left right and center, celebrities and non-celebrities alike

his reputation grows beyond him, and before long he’s known as a serial dater - not the hopeless romantic he truly is, but as a womaniser. it stings, at first, but he grows to find it entertaining. he has, of course, always enjoyed a performance.

he joins the first team when he is twenty, and spends a couple more years coming off the bench, occasionally starting, but by no means a star of the sport. he loves quidditch, for sure, but it is far from his true passion. he mostly just knows it is how he pays his bills. at twenty-three, he is traded to the kestrels. he starts four games, then suffers an injury that even magic cannot properly heal - a bludger to the knee, combined with a hard and fast fall.

he never plays a full game again, and retires at the end of the season. with nothing to do, he spends days with his parents, and seeks out a new purpose. it takes him a while to find it - but his celebrity had always been growing, and along with it his activism, as a muggleborn himself, for acceptance and equality of all blood statuses.

the fame, however, is what attracts magical directors to him: he clearly can perform, and always have. he is by no means a prestigious nor heavily talented actor, but he is captivating enough to please them. after his first play, the roles do not stop being offered. mostly comedic, but he does not complain - entertainment was always a talent of ajax’s, after all.

it takes little effort to join the order once the inevitability war becomes clear - he is, after all, well known for believing in their cause. he is, however, not much of a fighter. more of a symbol, a face, a public figure to push the agenda.

buhhhhh yeah that’s what i’ve got for now!!!! to be clear. this is a lad. he’s a lad. he’s out here being stupid in the pub!!! goofing it!!!! still attending every single cannons AND kestrels game!!! he really didn’t think through the whole public figure part of this!!! the bro of all bros!!!! love him!!!!!