assigning Scully to the X-files was the funniest thing the US government ever did because imagine you send this logical, rule-following scientist to spy on the Basement Weirdo but instead they fall in love and soul-bond so intensely that it’s actually a legitimate threat to national security. all the super-important super-evil government conspiracies are at risk because you (the US government) accidentally pulled the best matchmaking job in history and now they’re so in love and oh shit they’re breaking into another top-secret facility, they’re discovering evidence of another war crime, they’re gazing longingly into each other’s eyes next to a crashed ufo and it’s all your fucking fault