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maryleest

in my preschool class we’re holding “class president of the day” elections this week. we already elected our first female president on monday, even though one of the boy’s campaign promises was to “bring jewels” to the classroom.

charlietheskonk

tuesday: we talked about the real election happening today. one child says she hopes hillary clinton wins and all of her classmates chime in with sober agreements. one boy says voting for the drumpf “would not be a very good idea.”

they elected the other female candidate today in our mock election, so she won over the jewels boy and the other boy, who said he would make bracelets for the entire class. my students are surprisingly practical, seeing as they voted for the candidate who would clean the school and help them with their work.

once president, she did do those things, but also punched one of her constituents into the sandbox, so, i mean … she’s sort of a typical politician i guess

charlietheskonk

wednesday: the children announced tensely to me that trump won the real election. one boy said, “i still don’t like him, but we can’t say we hate him, because then we would be saying we hate the president.”

i said that was true, and that saying we hate him sounds a lot like something trump would say. they nodded and continued to help the toddler class students get their snack plates to the table without dropping their apple slices.

they elected one of the girls again, so she served her second term by helping her friends button their art smocks before we made our galaxy paintings. (because if you think i’m gonna create an art lesson plan to focus any more attention on this shitshow of an election, you are wrong.)

neither of the boy candidates have stood much of a chance in this race so far. one of them came to me and said he was rethinking his campaign promises, and could he make a new poster

he got a paper and wrote a huge list of ways that he would help keep all the children safe, including reminding them to use walking feet and not to touch broken glass. then he volunteered to work in the toddler room and cleaned up all of their messes, and moved all the shelves in my room so he could clean behind them.

i’m feeling so hopeless right now, but these children remind me that there is a future and they. are. it.

charlietheskonk

thursday: today i was very pleased. our president today is the little boy who made changes to his campaign promises. he also wore tyrannosaurus rex foot slippers. when the voters were shaking his hand to congratulate him on his victory, one said, “good job, and thank you for having monster feet”

he watched everyone like a hawk to make sure they were being safe, and then spent the morning writing in his journal about how much he loves all of us and his bicycle.

Pure

Dwayne’s Gaston

LISTEN BITCH

mymompickedthisurlss-deactivate

ok so. there’s an office administrator at my work and she has this cute little 2 year old named William. he calls me “Nick so tall”. like that’s my name to him, but he says it like it’s one word. “Nicksotall”. and i love it so I’ve taken to calling him Will So Lil’ and we get along like a housefire. i haven’t seen him in like two weeks, but his mom comes in to work today and tells me that recently he’s been telling his own bedtime stories, and he starts them all with once upon a time and everything. cute right? well to me it gets cuter, because he has been telling stories about Batman, Spider-man, and Nicksotall. and we have these adventures and climb buildings and fight crime together and i have to be honest, it warmed my heart so fucking much it’s ridiculous

tl;dr I’m a superhero to an adorable 2 year old