The Better Boyfriend Program
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Hey everyone, Brody here. So yeah. Megan and Paul roasted me mercilessly. I mean, I knew I wasn't perfect but damn. Guess I didn't realize how bad I must seem to them sometimes. First time I've seen those two agree on something in a long time.
So that's why I'm here at this Better Boyfriend Program. Can't say I'm too excited. Paul's boyfriend apparently sent him here too and they broke up anyway. But whatever. If they want to spend money to send me to some spa and fitness retreat, I'll take it.
But yeah. They uh want me to record myself each day, to reflect or some shit. Feels kinda weird but whatever. So I got here late last night and met my roommate, Phillip. Pretty cool dude actually. Bit of a dweeb but seems nice enough. This morning started with an icebreaker session. Met a bunch of other guys all here for the same reason - becoming better boyfriends.
After that, I had my first aroma therapy session. Felt pretty relaxing honestly. Lots of different scents, oils, candles. Made me feel calm and centered. Definitely needed that after the stress of the past couple days. Okay, that's it for today. Feeling pretty wiped out. Hope tomorrow isn't too crazy. Later!
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Alright, Day 2. Woke up feeling pretty refreshed actually. Had my first spa appointment with Michael. Super friendly guy. Michael gave me a thorough facial, cleaned my pores, applied masks and creams. Then he shaved my face, which was kinda strange since I usually rock the stubble look. But he assured me it was part of the process. The cream he put on afterwards felt amazing though, super moisturizing. Skin looks great now. Might have to pick some up for home. Saw Phillip again during lunch. Dude smells different than yesterday, more woodsy and earthy. He and the other guys gave me shit for smelling all floral. I'll talk to Michael about it.
Later, spent the afternoon by the pool. Let me tell ya, these guys have some pretty impressive physiques. I should ask them for some tips. But I'm feeling inspired to start hitting the weights more often…Phillip came over to chat for a bit. Still super chill, easy to talk to. Told me he was enjoying the program so far. Me? Eh, still trying to wrap my head around it all.
Gonna crash early tonight. More treatments in the morning. Hopefully won't be too intense. Catch you later!
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Wow, Day 3. Where do I even begin?
Had another session with Michael. This time, a full body massage. At first he seemed really focused on my lower back and glutes. Kinda awkward tbh. Told him I wasn't into it and asked him to focus on my upper body. He switched to working on my arms and pecs instead. Also asked if we could switch to a manlier smelling oil. He said it wasn't necessary, that the current blend was carefully curated for me. Whatever, I can handle a few jokes at my expense. But the massage itself was incredible though. Most relaxed I've felt in ages.
Hit the gym after that, hoping to bulk up a bit, but the trainers steered me towards cardio and squats instead. Kinda sucked watching all the other guys get to lift though. Their girlfriends are gonna be so lucky by the end of this.
Afterwards, had a therapy session. Discussed toxic masculinity and control. Never really thought about it before but I guess I do have some toxic traits. Something to work on moving forward I guess.
Caught up with Phillip briefly. He's starting to fill out, gaining muscle. Looking real good. Hard not to stare, haha. Gotta stay focused though. Off to bed. Let's see what tomorrow brings. Until then!
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Whoa, Day 4. Things are really picking up speed now.
Met up with Michael again. Focused was on my ass this time. I know I wasn't comfortable with it the other day, but I guess I needed this after those squats. Midway through he started showering me with complements. Called my ass smooth, curvy, perky… Really putting the moves on or what? Haha. Joking.
Anyways, the massage ended up feeling pretty great and my butt does feel firmer, so hey, progress! Went to my second therapy session after that. Talked mostly about Megan's bestie Paul and being gay. Never really considered what it means to me personally. Makes sense I suppose, since I'm straight. Definitely made me think twice about some of my preconceived notions. Always good to challenge yourself.
Ran into Phillip again, who's now going by Phil. Holy shit, he's gotten hot. Face squared out, jawline sharper. Clothes hugging his frame perfectly. Caught myself staring multiple times. Phil noticed and playfully called me out on it. I told him he was looking swole. He told me I was getting cute and slapped my ass. Would've brushed it off before but… I liked it. There's something hot about Phil's confidence.
Not sure what else to say. I don't really know how this'll make me a better boyfriend, but hey, trust the process.
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Can't believe it's already Day 5. Time flies when you're constantly pampered, I guess.
Went for my massage and Michael proposed something different. Asked if I'd be down to get waxed. Thought about it a bit, I mean, a real man should be hairy, right? I held off. But after they, sent me to aroma therapy to relax. Smells in there were intense but worked wonders. Calmed me down completely. Thought a bit more about getting waxed and you know what? Fuck it. Some guys really rock the clean-shaven look.
Turns out I was way hairier than I realized. Back, chest, legs, groin… Man, feels strange being completely smooth, but I could get used to it. Guess I'll have to because Michael slathered on some "special cream" that supposedly prevents regrowth. Kinda freaked me out to be honest. Especially since Megan seemed to like my chest hair. But I have to trust the process.
In the evening, we had a group reflection session. Everyone shared how the program has affected them so far. A few talked about feeling more open-minded. Others said they were connecting with their bodies differently. Personally, I couldn't stop glancing at Phil across the circle. God he looks like one of the guys from the team now... Speaking of which, wonder what the guys on my football team would think if they saw me now. Whatevs. Should probably get some sleep.
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Man, Day 6. Can't believe I'm this far along *giggles*. Alright, alright *clears throat*.
Started with a meeting with the program director. Told her I was dating a woman, not sure why that mattered to her but she acted pretty surprised. Didn't elaborate though, just said I'd benefit regardless and we're pretty deep into the process by now.
After, I went for my usual massage. But Michael was joined by some kind of sex therapist this time, who asked about how I like to pleasure myself. Kind of on the nose, but I'm not ashamed. She told me that she wanted to help me explore alternative pleasure sources for men, outside of the "nontraditional." Sure why not, right? But totes wasn't expected them to put a vibrating plug up my ass. I wanted to freak out, but fuck... Could barely focus for the rest of the day with that thing buzzing away. Did teach me how good ass play can feel though… Megan might need to invest in a strap-on. Definitely see the appeal of being the "receiving partner" or whatever that sex lady said. Who knows.
Therapy was a struggle because of the distraction but we got through it. Kept zoning out, thinking about Phil and his progress. Speaking of Phil, he's downright sexy. Reminds me a bit of Paul. Paul... Fuck...
Anyway, Michael came to remove the toy. Asked if I enjoyed it. I admitted I did. He smiled and said that was good, that I was making excellent progress. Part of me felt ashamed, like I betrayed my masculinity somehow. But the rest of me was eager for more. That's all for now. Need a cold shower.
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Okay Day 7… Where do I start? Therapy was all about exploring homosexuality and sexuality as a whole this time. Talked a lot about sexual dynamics between men. Top vs bottom, roles, etc. When she asked what I thought, I'll admit I judged the hell out of being a bottom. Didn't seem very masculine at all. But after discussing expectations, dynamics, communication needs… I'm starting to rethink. Look at me, expanding my worldview.
Wound up thinking about other men in my life. Realized Phil probably makes a strong top based on his build. And yeah, Paul definitely falls into that category too. My bros on the team? Fuck yeah, they'd be tops. But me? I don't know. I thought I could be a top, but the more I think about it, the less certain I am. Especially when I think about guys like Paul and Phil. They're so big and muscly and hairy... I... I guess my time away from the gym really did a number on my gains. And the waxing too really... Fuck, whatever. The therapist told me to think about it.
Not sure how knowing that fits into all this. Maybe that would make me a better boyfriend? Knowing how to switch things up and take turns?
Oh fuck... How could I forget the other big event today? Michael gave me a very thorough handjob during our massage today. Used this special oil that made my dick ultra sensitive and tingly. Came embarrassingly fast. He said that was normal and that I shouldn't be embarrassed. Easy for him to say. Does he even know he's the first dude to get me off? Fuck... I can't tell anyone I know about this...
But things got even more intense. That sex coach? She brought in a dildo and started teaching me a proper blowjob technique. I balked- there was no fucking way I was gonna ever need that. She told me to keep the dildo with me and reconsider.
Admittedly, I got bored in my room while Phil was at the gym. Had nothing else to do, so practiced on it until I felt like I had the hang of it. Don't know if I'll ever use those skills, but I kinda had fun. Of course Phil walked in all sweaty, and saw me sucking off a thick, pink dildo. Luckily he was cool about, told me he could give me the real thing if I wanted. As if...
Feeling a little overwhelmed honestly. Only a few days left now.
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I... I want to go home. It's Day 8 and everything feels so wrong. Okay, so normally I wake up rock hard. But nope. Flaccid this morning and stayed that way. Shouldn't matter right? Except… My ass felt good though. My hole? Fuck... I keep fingering myself in private. It feels so amazing. And my dick? Nothing... It's so useless.
Didn't see Michael today which bummed me out more than it should. Been craving his touch, which is so messed up… fuck! Like, I couldn't do anything today. My ass feels so empty and I hate it. Like I NEED something inside. It's driving me insane. So I did it. That dildo? Went to the bathroom and fucked myself with it. And... And I saw myself in the mirror... I'm not me! I'm hairless, skinny, and I look so pouty and desperate. I wanted to say something! To someone! But... Phil walked in and oh em gee... Muscles upon muscles, hairy chest, bulging crotch… Goddamn. Pure testosterone. Can't tear my eyes away, so I just watched him play videogames but really I was salivating over the bulge in his boxers.
What am I saying? How the fuck did this happen to me? This isn't me. I don't drool over other men. How is this supposed to make me a better boyfriend? The thought of doing anything with Megan is so... icky. But someone like Phil? Or Paul? Oh fuck... Paul...
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Oh honey, Day 9. It was… sooooo enlightening.
First up, had another sit-down with the therapist. Girl was ready to break it down for me, bless her heart. Explained that the Day 8 blues are totally normal, happens to everyone nearing the finish line. Helped me sort through my fears and confusion. Basically said I ain't the same Brody I was when I stepped foot in this place. Which I could definitely tell. The real question is - who am I now? Who am I meant to be? And then she drops the bomb - I gotta choose a new name. One that represents my true self.
Took me a minute to wrap my head around that. New name? What the hell. But I went with it. Played around with a few options. Nothing clicked until I landed on BJ. Short for Brody James but also… ya know. Perfect fit for the new me! The therapist was thrilled, told me I was embracing my identity. And I felt good about it too. Excited even. Ready to step into this new chapter.
Next up, a visit with the sex therapist. Now THIS girl was a trip. She wanted to get deep into my feelings about my sexuality. Had to really examine how I view myself. Gay, bi, pan? Top, bottom, vers? Submissive, dominant? The whole shebang. Initially denied it all but I could tell she wasn't buying it. So I owned up to it. Told her about the dildo and what I did with it. Admitted I'm gay as fuck and love taking cock. She cheered, high-fived me, said I was making leaps and bounds.
So during the group share, I came clean to everyone. Yelled it loud and proud - I'm gay, I'm a bottom, and I ain't gonna apologize for it! The boys cheered, patted my back. Never felt so accepted in my life.
And afterwards? Went back to my room with Phil. Decided it was time to put my new skills to use. Dropped to my knees and sucked his fat cock until he exploded down my throat. Best. Day. Ever.
But y'all know who I REALLY want though? Paul. Gonna beg him to fuck my fat ass. I'mma be such a good little cumdump for him. Oh yes ma'am, I'm ready. I can't wait to see everyone tomorrow!
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When the doors opened, Megan nearly dropped her purse at the sight of Brody - or that man they said was Brody. This was someone else entirely. Megan gaped at the slender figure practically pouring out of skimpy crop top and booty shorts that showed off his pert ass. Her mind reeled. This wasn't possible. What the actual fuck?
Paul smirked beside her, eyes roving hungrily over the twink's thick ass. "Fuck, you're better than I imagined." he purred, sauntering forward.
"Paul." BJ practically moaned, as his ass clenched with need.
"Oh my god, what the fuck happened to you?" Megan was staring wide-eyed, turning now to face Paul, "What the fuck!?"
Paul shrugged unapologetically. "Like I said, hun, I had a special itinerary planned for him, and it looks like he responded real well." He smiled, "See, when I went through it, my ex had me become a total dominant top." He sighed, "He couldn't handle me or my needs. But now…" BJ practically melted into his arms, "I've got the perfect little boyfriend. Sorry Meg, but consider this payback for always siding with my ex."
"You bitch!" Meg stormed off, leaving the new couple standing at the entrance.
"Paul?" BJ clung to him, "Can you take me home?"
"Of course, babe." Paul purred, pulling BJ flush against him. "Let's go home and I'll show you exactly what a real man can do."
BJ shuddered in delight, his holes already aching to be filled. He had been so patient, such a good little twink. And now he would get his reward. His life as Paul's boyfriend- his personal fucktoy- was just beginning. And he was so ready.
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