Sabrie's Tragedy

Rant and fandom account. I will do everything I want here. Anon rants a lot beware. My posts are my thoughts and opinions, and my headcannons are not being enforced on you, so don't take it personally. Please dni for people 18 below or are US-Americans - yes, I hate USA with a passion. MULTIFANDOM!

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Kuro yaibai's so funny it's like I'm rewatching Conan but with great action animation, they even got the VA 😭

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Feeling nostalgic right now.... Time to watch something dumb to counter it then! Lmao I need to avoid these thoughts.

For real though, must just be the hormones speaking. it has been due to be really bad for a while and it hasn't been this bad since that friendship separation arc* (lol)

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So far it hasn't been as bad as that time I did the oopsie back in HS though, so the recent oopsie due to that arc* was probably not even that deep too and I just overeacted so much lmao I thought we were friends but it seemed we were not from their perspective. That still hurts ngl, and it made me put my walls higher when it comes to friendship (AKA I should have stayed a lurker 😭). Anyway, glad that was done. I just need to find a way to vent that does not involve needles or blades next time.....

I have a badddd tendency to overthink, so now I think everyone else from that friend circle hates my guts secretly and it's making me more reclusive. Might delete my discord too, idk, depends on what happens next. I might even confront them for the final time before I say a final goodbye just for closure's sake. Gahd I reaaaally need to sleep this off and hope these feelings stabilise by the morning.

[Regarding the thing, I am not in danger of doing bad things or say bad things to people rn so pls do not ban me tmblr staff]

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I feel very appreciated and appreciative as well. My friends and I went out to do a little Christmas party, and we exchanged gifts and ate at a hotpot. We were unfortunately kicked out due to how loud we were during the process of gift giving. So we had to cut our trip short and went home separately from the trains. The gifts were very thoughtful! It was all useable with some edibles (*NOT WEED), I ate the jellies on the way home.

Perhaps the funniest gift is the one that looked like a Marlboro box but is actually a bubble maker! I would never use it to preserve the bubble powder, but I sure will be able to use the cigarette as props for cosplay!

Here's to another year of our friendship~

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Kinda just bummed out that the old friendship ended the way it did. But I don't dwell on it anymore because I can't do much anyway, at this point I think I have moved on in mind and spirit already and my habits just need to follow (gah I need to stop checking our chats, this is so sad)

Now I'm just worried about the current friendships I have. My year wrapped up shows I talked the most with one person from the other friendship circle, but the problem is the other friendship circle doesn't like her for valid reasons. Unfortunately, I was friends with her before I found out about what she supposedly did, which at this point in time, I am kind of having doubts. What if she is that kind of person as my other friend says? Or, what if she was, but has changed already through the years? Anyway, I'm not going to talk about it with her or ask her, because I know that will be just cause for nore drama and trauma resurfacing.... But it's just making me feel awful by the minute.

I wanna stand up for my friend who got told such a bad thing so much. But at the same time on the other hand, I don't see that other friend being the same person who could do such a thing. I'm hoping that it was all just a misunderstanding....

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I feel like my friends' patiences are running low on me. When I opened my phone I have 10 different messages from different people of varying topics, and I feel so overloaded that I ended up not replying to some of them. I keep having the thought at the back of my mind to just reply anything at least to acknowledge that I received the message, but I want to be emotionally in the moment when I do so, leading to me not actually being able to reply at all for at least a few hours....

I'm so sorry (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠)

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Bee :)