"I'm not having this baby."
I’m not having this baby.
The hand gloomily hovering near her face draws back with a jolt. Rey opens her eyes, finding the face of the dark warlord just in front of her, as always. Just, the look on his face is different now. He looks puzzled, concerned.
“What…?”
“What?” she echoes aggressively, almost scornful, pulling at her restraints. She can’t believe they’re in that same situation once more. Everything has changed between them, but at the same time nothing has really changed. They’re still enemies and have to behave as such.
Kylo takes a step back. He needs time to elaborate what he has just seen in her mind. He walks around the room, glad like never before to be alone during the interrogations. He wouldn’t want anyone to see the raw emotion on his face right now.
“You…” he starts, stopping in front of Rey once again. She simply stares at his conflicted expression without understanding. It seems that something he saw in her mind has unsettled him, badly.
Her eyes grow wide. Could he know…?
The realization hits both of them at the same time.
“You’re expecting.” “Yes.”
Their voices overlap. They look at each other, Kylo can’t hide his shock, while Rey’s face is a mask of indifference.
He doesn’t know what to do. He shouldn’t be affected by the news and it scares him that his first thought upon finding out was to let her go. It scares him that his first worry was that of accidentally hurt her or the child.
Then, he remembers.
“You don’t want it,” he says, voice void of any emotion.
“No,” Rey confirms, holding his stare even though there’s a tremble in her eyes.
Kylo turns away from her, starts pacing the room again. “Why? You could give the Resistance a new fighter. Probably as strong in the Force as you are and as skilled as his father, whoever he is.” He shakes his head, realizes his voice sounds more bitter than he wants to. “The Resistance would certainly need some help a few years from now, assuming there’s any of you left by then,” he looks at her and smiles with disdain.
Rey doesn’t flinch. “It’s yours.”
Kylo stops pacing, as if frozen in place. He slowly turns to face her once more. There’s doubt and incredulity on his face.
Rey’s heart is pounding hard against her ribcage, her voice fails her a little when she speaks again. “What?” She shows a quivering smile. “You already forgot about Canto Bight?”
“That was–”
“Almost five months ago.”
Kylo’s eyes are drawn to her abdomen. He would have never guessed. It’s probably because she has always been so skinny, her belly doesn’t even show yet.
There’s another issue, though. He clenches his fists. “Why don’t you want it?” He says slowly, pronouncing every word with subtle grudge.
Rey tilts her head to the side. “You, out of all of people, shouldn’t be asking this question.”
“What?”
“I saw it the first time I got into your mind. It was such a strong feeling that it overshadowed everything else,” she says. He’s beginning to understand where she’s going, because his expression turns worrisome again. She goes on, “your fear of abandonment. What pushed you to the Dark Side in the first place. I saw it all.”
Kylo barely flinches. “It has nothing to do with–”
“No?” Rey cuts in. “The General was always too busy with the war and your father was just too scared to be there,” she eyes him knowingly. “Doesn’t it remind you of something? I’m with the Resistance now and no one can seem to see an end to this war. And you…” she pauses, taking in the guilt in his eyes. “You’re the enemy. How can I give birth to a child in these conditions? What good can I teach him, when his father is the embodiment of everything he should despise? How can I do this to him? More than that, why should I? To see him turn away from me like you did?”
Kylo stays silent, eyes somewhere far from Rey’s face. His fists, once clenched, slowly relax.
“So it’s a boy.”
Rey raises an eyebrow. “Were you even listening to me?”
“Is it?” Kylo pushes, this time staring right into her eyes.
Her shoulders deflate in defeat. “Yes.”
Kylo just nods, looking away again. “I see, now. I was wondering why you would let yourself get caught.”
Rey frowns. “What?”
“You wanted to meet me, that’s why you needed to be brought on board.”
“Nonsense,” she smirks, avoiding his piercing eyes.
“Yes? Then why didn’t you get rid of these restraints?” He makes a vague gesture with one hand and everything that held her against the chair is suddenly gone. “You could do it at any moment, but you didn’t. You wanted to be here,” she can feel that he’s more convinced of what he’s saying word after word. He looks almost triumphant when he finally says, “You wanted to tell me about this.”
Rey is still not looking at him, but he can see her lips trembling. “Why would I want such a thing?” she murmurs.
He walks closer, towering over her with his height and size, looking threatening. But his next words are incredibly soft, “Because you actually want to keep it, don’t you?”
Her eyes are watery and she blames the pregnancy for those emotions. Kylo takes her chin between his fingers. “Rey… we will find a way.”
He makes her turn his way, but she still takes her time before finally returning his stare. Their faces are so close that their lips are almost touching. She looks into his eyes and sees the same fierce emotions of that night of five months before. Those eyes are the reason she fell for him in the first place. He was always a good liar, but his eyes couldn’t lie. They always told her exactly how he feels about her.
“How…?” she says with trembling lips.
He brushes his thumb across her wet cheek, moving his eyes in hers. “You just need to trust me.”
