AestheticLily

Actually Not So Aesthetic

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

The sun’s understanding of color has always exceeded the human’s understanding of the sun.

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

my friend keeps inviting me to her youth group and I appreciate the effort but I’m anxious and bi

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

I’m just trying to live here plz leave ur ignorance and unkindness somewhere else

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

tell me when that one person’s disapproval stops hurting

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

Admit it mayo salad isn’t the worst thing I’ve done

[ninasfireescape]

aesthetics >>> the umbrella academy (2019-)

“we all wanted to be loved by a man incapable of giving love”

[waller-bridge]

This is the employment Steve, reblog for bountiful job opportunity.

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

Please

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

Whenever the nasties come to play I say:

when you’re ace and can’t relate

[27-umbrellas]

Klaus’s four moods are horny, drug overdose, be gay do crimes, and sad puppy dog eyes

[incorrecttua]

Klaus: How have you been?

Vanya: Really good actually. To the point where I think something must be wrong

[walkingthroughhistory-deactivat]

The joyous things you hear in the english literature department.

" Isn't he dead?"

" Why the fuck is there French?!"

" Maurice, you utter twat."

" Anyone got a clean copy?"

"Pretty sure that's homoerotic."

"I've been here for an hour and have forgotten more than I've remembered."

" I hope this prick dies."

" Another dead of fever , shocked? No."

" * unintelligible arguing about Byron*"

" He's as thick as a plank of wood and not half as useful."

[robotmango]

it’s ninety-nine degrees outside, four fuck-thousand percent humidity, and my husband was like, “i’m gonna go for a bike ride.” and i was like “why. no. why. don’t put us on the news like that. local fool collapses on unnecessary journey. don’t do it.” so he says he doesn’t want to “hide in the house” because the sun is shining. bruh. honeybruh. “the sun is shining” does not cover it. its hot outside. its motherfucking hot as fuck outside. our outdoor plants have been crying into their hands all week. whole cars are melting into the sewer. our fucking patio umbrella developed sentience to ask me for lemonade this morning

[awed-frog]

@robotmango, you need to work for the weather forecast - this was both hilarious and so vivid it made me stand up and get some iced tea.

[robotmango]

this is a great idea, thank you. here goes. my audition tape for the weather channel. dearly beloved. we are gathered here today to have a fucking funeral for the outdoors. it had a good run, with all its creeks and clouds and shit. pretty great. now it’s ten-thirty at night but still ninety-two asshole-sweating degrees and humid as fuck. everything is hot and slimy, like being a “borrower” that got trapped inside a bottle of shampoo and then accidentally microwaved. you can see on my doppler radar that nothing is moving around out there because everything is probably dead. the only alive thing is the mosquito currently trying to drill a hole in my leg. no surprise that all the shitbag mosquitos are fine, since the thermostat of hell is always at the devil’s preferred temperature. this forecast has gotten away from me a little, but in conclusion fuck the sun

[scarylullabies]

I think I’ve reblogged this before, but “the thermostat of hell is always at the devil’s preferred temperature” is fucking poetry

[piranesiandtheother-deactivated]

ninety nine???? thats IT????????? buddy here in the 7th circle of h*ck, California, we get up to at LEAST 110 degrees every single gosh darned summer.  the bugs seek revenge.  the sun wreaks havoc on the mere mortals it surveys.   every plant has turned brown in its thirst for water.  the very air itself has been sucked dry of every drip of moisture it ever had.  

ninety nine degrees.  you weak fool.

[robotmango]

well since you asked so politely, let’s talk about something very important vis a vis weather-hotness that you clearly ain’t ever heard of, called

humidity

oh alas, you say. oh papa, whatever shall i do, it is ever so hotte and drye in california. the very air hath been sucked of all its moisturey droplets and whatnot.* one hundredy and tennith desiccated degrees!

*(yo, drought is serious. i am pretty obviously not making fun of that.)

alright. let’s check it out. here’s a random california city, right about now:

thirty-two percent. and here’s a random mid-atlantic city located somewhere in the wet fleshy crease behind a demon’s knee*:

*(confession: i do not live in dc, but several years ago i spent three weeks steaming like a tinned ham in arlington in august. none of the pants i took with me could ever keep a crease again.)

huh! funny thing! “see, dc’s actually seven degrees COOLER,” you say, because you’ve obviously never gone outside and taken a deep lungful of wet sock trash air in your life. and now for added bliss, here’s what early wednesday morning’s gonna be like for these poor clowns:

that’s right! eighty-two percent humidity! the point at which showers no longer matter, because you’re all caught in God’s grease trap! just stressed human eels miserably slip slidin’ their way through a damp melty bathwater-flavored hellscape that feels like it’s actively sous viding their top layer of skin! a hundred thousand people packed into public transit breathing air that feels like deepthroating swamp thing! and you wanna talk to me about fuckin california!

[cue science voice]: human bodies cool through evaporation, a process by which the body sweats and sweet invisible angels towel us off, whisking away our unwanted moisture into the air and literally chilling us out. (it’s also why air conditioned air feels so fucking deliciously refreshing: it’s not just being cooled, it’s being conditioned, aka, dehumidified. it’s cool dry air.) but. if the air is already made out of fucking chowder and can’t absorb shit then guess what the fuck our bodies can’t do.

so is this weak fool gonna remain indoors and hydrated through this only medium-hot but fuckoff-humid season? you bet your dried out ass.

[silentassassin21]

Positive 2019 Pride things!

[wardenpharah]

Fic writer aesthetic

- you just had a brilliant idea. it’s 3am - bonus: you have something important the next day - “wow I wrote so much, let’s see the word counter” 350 words “LIES” - when your worst work gets the most attention - “[AO3] You’ve got kudos!” emails are your lifeblood, water your crops, and clear your skin - B L A N K P A G E S O F D O O M - playing the entire story out in your head. never writing it - watching or reading anything ever and imagining an au - making playlists to write to. never writing - getting an “[AO3] Comment on ______” email and doing the thing. you know the one - headcanons. so many headcanons - spending days or weeks on a piece - watching the hit count rise and the kudos count stay on said work - when will the kudos return from war

[bearfeathers]

@lywinis

[ford-ye-fiji]

@dazais-guardian-angel

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

- someone comments what they think will happen and it’s way better than u were originally going to do so “snatch”

- update?

- rereading ur work and wanting to edit so bad but u know you’ll change the whole storyline if u do

- staying away from the site cause u don’t want to hear the anguished cries of ur readers wanting more

- joining as an editor on somebody’s book and they leave and make u author so now u have this child u didn’t ask for but god dammit if u think I’m gonna abandon them!

- trying to stay interested in the fandom

- trying to get to the good parts

- wishing someone would write this for you but u need to write it so that it’s right

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

I got a 26 on the ACT and yet I still can’t do shit

[homages]

this picture is so quality can we make this into a meme format it’s basically

[aestheticallyoblivious01]

Am I doing this right?

[studylustre]

u know what pals? we’re gonna be fine. sit down, drink some water, treat urself to a face mask. we’re going to make it through.