Final Fantasy Games Summed Up
Final Fantasy: Some jerk in armor says he'll knock you down. You kick his ass and he becomes a god.
Final Fantasy II: David Bowie decides Earth isn't enough to rule so he takes Heaven and Hell too.
Final Fantasy III: Stormy weather is a pain in the ass and also kinda hot. Also, Onions.
Final Fantasy IV: The world's slowest on the uptake knight decides to turn good just as his best friend decides to bitch about the friendzone and try to kill him. This leads to them beating up Darth Vader and flying to the moon to fight a cockroach.
Final Fantasy IV The After Years: How much shit can happen to the same guy twice?
Final Fantasy V: An awkwardly named boy sets off on a quest to chop down a tree.
Final Fantasy VI: The Joker decides to kill Hitler and blow up the planet. Also, opera.
Final Fantay VII: A goth with an Oedipus complex decides to ruin the life of a roleplayer with severe issues.
Final Fantasy VII Crisis Core: Gackt screws everyone over with his universe's equivalent of Twilight, and Cloud turns emo.
Dirge of Cerberus: Vincent gets confused and thinks he's Shadow the Hedgehog.
Final Fantasy VIII: High school sucks. Having to kill between classes and beat up an old witch while your teacher hits on you sucks even more.
Final Fantasy IX: Goku sets off with a girl and some Muppets to lay the smack down on his S&M fetishist brother and his robot overlord boss. Also, food.
Final Fantasy X: Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy...? Also, abusive dads suck.
Final Fantasy X-2: Charlie's Angels go looking for a blonde bishie who may or may not be alive.
Final Fantasy XI: Square Enix used Ultima! Time K.O.!
Final Fantasy XII: Aladdin joins the Rebel Alliance and beats up Judge Dredd. Also, bunny girls.
Final Fantasy XII Revenant Wings: He may look like Jesus, but he hates your guts. Also, flying judge!
Final Fantasy XIII: The Robot Pope decides he's had enough, so it's up to a pissed off soldier, Duke Nukem's surfer cousin, Richard Pryor, and two Aussie lesbians to save the world.
Final Fantasy Type-0: High school really, really, sucks
Final Fantasy XIII-2: Axl Rose is pissed, so he decides to kill time, literally.
Final Fantasy XIV: Buggier than Yevon and Zeromus combined, enjoy waiting for the rerelease.
Lightning Returns Final Fantasy XIII: Majora's Mask with a cyberpunk aesthetic.
Final Fantasy XV: Derpy Goths do stuff...eventually. If it doesn't get delayed again.
Final Fantasy Tactics: The Church is actually the Demons. Oh snap.
Final Fantasy Tactics Advance: One boy decides to stage an intervention for his Final Fantasy addicted friends.
Final Fantasy Tactics A2: I'm going to spend my vacation AT THE LIBRARY!
Dissidia: Final Fantasy: DBZ Budokai Tenkaichi with all your old friends. Also, Kefka trolls everyone.
Dissidia 12: Kain joins with Lightning and a thousand fan art pieces were born.
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