half of my time spent in public spaces consists of me wondering if i’m acting normal enough

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@afghanwanderer
half of my time spent in public spaces consists of me wondering if i’m acting normal enough
sorry I forgot i'm alive Can you please repeat the question.
“I feel very small. I don’t understand. I have so much courage, fire, energy, for many things, yet I get so hurt, so wounded by small things.”
— Anaïs Nin, from Nearer the Moon: The Previously Unpublished Unexpurgated Diary, 1937-1939
James Baldwin, Giovanni's Room
Imaam Malik bin Dinar said:
"When you see hardness in your heart, weakness in your body, deprivation in your sustenance, then know that your tongue spoke which does not concern you."
[فيض القدير 369/1]
“I was so tired of being alone, but I was always alone, even with people around me. And I was so tired of being surrounded, but I was always surrounded, even when I was by myself.”
— Maggie Stiefvator, Sinner
Someone was once pierced by a thorn, and he said: “Indeed, I know that you’re due to my sins, and that my Lord isn’t a tyrant!”
Hasan al-Basri - Kitab az-Zuhd by Imam Ahmad (p. 229)
Son of Adam, if you knew the value of yourself, you wouldn't insult yourself by committing sins. You are chosen and preferred among His creation, and heaven is prepared for you!
Kitab Lataif al-Ma’arif by Imam Ibn Rajab al-Hanbali (p. 183)
Imam Sha'bi was asked about an issue, and he said: I don't know.
He was told: Aren't you embarrassed by saying, I don't know, whilst you're the jurist of the people of Iraq?
He replied: Yet the Angels weren't ashamed when they said: ﴾We have no knowledge except what You have taught us﴿ [2:32]
Source: I'lam al-Muwaqqi'in 'an Rabb al-'Alamin by Ibn al-Qayyim (v. 4, p. 167-168)
Afghan fighter in destroyed western suburb of Kabul, Afghanistan, 1995
Life went on here once; families grew, children played and neighbors built a comfortable, middle-class community with one another. And then the fighting destroyed it. And looters carried the remains away - doors, window frames, plumbing, everything.
Say, “I seek refuge in the Lord of daybreak From the evil of that which He created And from the evil of darkness when it settles And from the evil of the blowers in knots And from the evil of an envier when he envies.”
﴿وإذا قرئ القرآن فاستمعوا له وأنصتوا لعلكم ترحمون﴾
Translation: And when the Qur’an is recited, listen to it, and pay attention, so that you may receive mercy.
Commentary: If this is the reward for the listener of the Qur'an, then what about the one who recites it?
Source: Tafsir al-Qurtubi (7:204)
When I remember death, it becomes easier for me to deal with the world.
Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal, Siyar a’lam an-Nubala
Surah Al-Infitar (82:6-9)
يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلْإِنسَٰنُ مَا غَرَّكَ بِرَبِّكَ ٱلْكَرِيمِ
ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكَ فَسَوَّىٰكَ فَعَدَلَكَ
فِىٓ أَىِّ صُورَةٍ مَّا شَآءَ رَكَّبَ
كَلَّا بَلْ تُكَذِّبُونَ بِٱلدِّينِ
O man! What has deceived you concerning your Lord, the Most Generous?
Who created you, fashioned you perfectly, and gave you due proportion.
In whatever form He willed, He put you together.
No! But you deny the Recompense (reward for good deeds and punishment for evil deeds on the Day of Judgement).
“You were so nice to me when I was having my problems, but now that you’re having yours, it seems there’s not a thing I can do for you. You’re all locked up in that little world of yours, and when I try knocking on the door, you just sort of look up for a second and go right back inside.”
— Haruki Murakami