The marriage of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and umm Salamah رضي الله عنها
Abū Salamah died, رضي الله عنه. As soon as her [umm Salamah] 'iddah was over, and the 'iddah are the months a woman must stay single before she remarries again, abū Bakr approached her and said "I am interested in marrying you". She declined him. 'Umar approached, she declined him and she's in distress so much that she complained to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. She's crying and crying, her husband is dead now, what is she going to do? The Prophet told her a du'ā. Everyone should know this du'ā. She said: oh Prophet, I am in my misery, I am in my agony, I am a widow. He said: say this du'ā, and Allāh is going to replace you with someone better than abū Salamah.
اللهم أجرني في مصيبتي واخلف لي خيرًا منها
Oh Allāh, aid me in my misery and replace me with that which is better. Everyone has to know this.
She said: "oh Prophet of Allāh, who's better than abū Salamah?" The days go on, when the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم approaches her and asks for her hand. Was Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم a womanizer? I will tell you how he was, that this woman was an old woman. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم remained with one woman from when he was 25 to 50. With one woman, Khadījah. What's the pride of a men? If one wants to be a womanizer and marry a lot of women, you do it when you're young, actually the women the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم married, every single one of them, has a very important reason behind it and most of the women the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم married were when he was 58, 59, 60 years old. Why didn't he marry anyone when he was 25 to 50? There's a lot of reasons behind it, as you're going to see.
So the Prophet approached her, and once to compensate for what she lost, he approached her and said: "I would like to marry umm Salamah". Umm Salamah said: "oh Prophet of Allāh, I can't say no to you, but I have a problem. Number one: I am an old woman. What do you need with an old woman? Why don't you marry a young one? Number two: I have too many kids to take care of. Number three: I am very jealous. Number four: all my guardians are in Makkah."
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم tells her: "your jealousy, I'll ask Allāh to take that away and help you with this. Your kids are my kids as well. I will raise your kids." In fact, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم raised her kids in the best kind of manner anyone can raise kids. That's one of the main reasons, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم married her. "Your guardians, all your guardians will accept me." Who's going to reject the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم? As to her being old he said, just to make her feel better; "I am older than you, tell someone, I feel older than you are".
She felt better and accepted the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم.
- Shaykh Ahmad Mūsā Jibrīl حفظه الله
