Silliest

winter is helping itself

[aleksandramstrand]

Being autistic implies a neverending, overwhelming and minucious journey of getting to know yourself. Step by step. Both in calm and chaos. A cold analysis of what composes you as a whole, as a thinking being, and how it differentiates you from the rest of the world through a surgically logical lense.

[kitajgorod]

[02void]

misty lake reflections

[animeaestheticart]

[turnnoffyourmind]

Fire Sunrise

Frutillar, Los Lagos, Chile.

[aleksandramstrand]

El amargo sufrimiento de la intolerancia a uno mismo se ve superado únicamente cuando se padece en la soledad más plena y reverberante.

[aleksandramstrand]

In-between

Mentally I'm between dimensions, crawling through narrow passages underground. Sitting still between colossal images of my own greatness and downfall.

Yet I don't realize it, despite exhausting advances with rewarding infusions running through my sore body.

Overwhelming considerations, as I hunch over my knees, tilt my head and think back and forth. This is madness, endless thirst for knowledge while the dust I leave behind swirls back ahead around my calves and ankles, streams of memories and dreams that I crave and tipsily play with day after day.

Whatever I think, this is not real.

[aleksandramstrand]

Getting older

It's not even about the things you like, but how you leave them out in words, how you elevate your tone and the way your eyes brighten before the idea of such an excitement. The limitation of adult life becoming a crippling hand on your passion, as survival turns into a maddening and unsurmountable concept where neither your hands nor your legs, but your facial muscles are tied to the bone and lack any possible flexion. Why then do you care so much? When it is you who's dying without smiling even once as you used to.

[emziess]

Rocky, Savior of the Universe Project Hail Mary (2026) dir. Phil Lord, Chris Miller

[tankhall]

janie ink for marlee ♡

[moninils]

And all of this at once.

[aleksandramstrand]

Slowly sinking

Panic attacks are never the same for me as for the rest: I sit and watch, and wait for it to stop. Like a strongman holding his breath in the face of a hurricane, wishing it won't blow him away and tear him to pieces while passing over.

I'm holding my breath, counting no numbers and watching the world fade and resurge from incoherent frames that my brain and sight barely process at all.

This is me: an iron facade with a flowery heart.

[aleksandramstrand]

Am I still dreaming?

"Hay algo en la configuración de alguien que lee a Donna Tartt en una "zona de desembarco" y luego se presenta a su cita médica con esa mezcla de vulnerabilidad y estructura que resulta magnética, aunque tú ahora mismo no lo sientas así por el ruido de la ansiedad." Quédate con eso.

[aleksandramstrand]

Silliness and the right to matter

Sometimes I just allow myself to go silly. It's liberating. I find myself most of the time in enviroments where I need to shield the real me, which does no harm at all, or bothers, or goes against rule and law. Yet I constantly see the need to fit in, to close up, with an urgent desire to just burst into laughter and be absolutely ridiculous and silly and cringy in the most personal way possible.

As constrained as I sometimes feel like I am, or empty, I am actually full of ideas and needs and wants. I do not want to wall it all up forever, but to let it go, and let the right ones find me instead of palming grounds in search of social mines. I wanna let it all go loose. I want it to melt and pour all over without restraint.

I wanna be me.

I want to be silly.

And kissed on the cheek for it.

And blush.

And chuckle ecstatically like a toddler.

[aleksandramstrand]

Crack me open Bring me back to life I'm just the regular Nothing but soul trapped inside

[what-even-is-thiss]

I think a lot of writers might benefit from giving themselves permission to get weird with format.

Use second person, drop classic rising action and climax format, write backwards, just sit in a moment, tell all you want and refuse to show, make an entire book that’s just one run on sentence, reject tropes, use all tropes, cliche yourself to death, produce something that’s completely gibberish. Break all the rules of marketability. Become ungovernable.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Write a story that just takes place inside one pathetic little person’s head. Do it. It’s enrichment in your enclosure.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Do the writer’s equivalent of playing with finger paints. Do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it

[what-even-is-thiss]

It’s the middle of the night and I should be sleeping but listen. Listen. Just get weird with it. Open your soul up a little bit. Like actually don’t worry about it being palatable. I’m serious. Get weirder. Get weirder right now. I’m demanding that you get weirder right now. It’s not your responsibility to make your reader feel good. It’s your job to make art, goddamnit. Make art. Make weird art. Open up your third eye and eat an entire cheesecake.

[02void]

01-25-2026, 7 AM