"But she gave birth to you, you owe her!"
My mother wanted to be a mother. It was her dream to be a mother. She poured all her energy into being a Good Christian Mother.
She did not want me. She wanted motherhood. I was a side effect of her dream. Once I was old enough to disagree with her, she hated me. I wasn't making her look like a Good Christian Mother. I was loud, disobedient, needy... almost like a child. Not quiet and pretty and grateful for crumbs.
Yes, she birthed me. For herself and her partner. For the people who were already born. Not for me. As all mothers have for all of time. It's not the birthing that makes a mother worth honoring, it's the parenting.
QFT:
It's not the birthing that makes a mother worth honoring, it's the parenting.
also, don't mistake "put in a lot of time and energy" for "made an effort to do a good job". if you put a lot of time and energy into hurting the kid, that's not actually trying to do a good job, that's just being an asshole.
