my stupid fucking thoughts :p @alex-vents-or-something - Tumblr Blog

okay fucking finally

sorry ab how long this took me

but in case you see this or something

uh

hi

my name is alex

he/it

this is a sideblog purely for vents. so, uhh, you prolly don't want to follow

half my issues are really fucking stupid, don't feel like you have to bother giving a shit. but you can, i guess. interact or not, idrc. but im pretty bad at asking for and accepting help in general, no matter who it's from. sorry

but uhh general tws for the blog uhh

idk dude, probably like. suicidal shit, maybe self harm, idrk

sorry. just in general

turns out i. didn't die. yet at least.

#tw self harm #tw suicide #tw selfhate #tw s3lf harm #tw depressing stuff #vents #cw sui thoughts #cw sui ideation #sorry #tw sh related #cw #vent

does it ever even count as a relapse if youve never really tried to get clean you just kind of stopped doing it as much but like not on purpose and you didn't put any work into it so like were you even that bad in the first place

#anyways my legsbleeding r

does anyone know the easiest household medicine to kys with?

like seriously tho nothings like. stopping me from killing myself. i mean i prolly wont cuz im a pussy + i have rehearsal 2day n id b killed if i killed myself before the performance AND during comp season like id acrually be executed. but stilllll its always an option

grabbin a knife js for a tiny bit of sh but raalizing nothin other than ur survival instinct is stoppin u from stabbin it into ur thraot

#im fine probably dw ab it #anyways #yeah

alex-vents-or-something

i need that twink (comfort character) obliterated (suicidal)

alex-just-vibing

getting to a point both in the night and both just scrolling thru the tag that its like. might as well read this fic with an au/plot id normally not read. itll be angsty enough.

alex-just-vibing

like.im sad enough that ill take literally just about any fic as long as the comfort chracter is saf

alex-just-vibing

ok maybe im tired but this lowkey good

alex-vents-or-something

okay switching to vent acc but like who cares but like

fuck dude i dont need the writing to even be good i just. need him to want to kil.himself. yknow how it be

tgeefs are plenty off rhings ive rhrown out of howerver ut appears that readidng fics ab comfort chracter of the month tryna kill themself when itss ways tooo lage at nivht is something you never leave behxinv

#shout out ryuji angst wrtiwirs you keeping me sane tm

i luv ao3 ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#like gragh #< forgetting about wanting to kill himself for long enough to cry a bit over sad ryuji instead #like girl #“are you worthy to live sakamoto?” “not at all but they are and i won't let you hurt them” like ????????? (pos)#girl that goes way too hard for me to be reading at like midnight #ouagh

gripping counter wow this is some good angst aint it

me : im tired . sets phone down to go to sleep

brain : KILL YOURSELF IMMEDIATELY

me : .. damn omay nevermind. tumblr and ao3 distract me

anyways. how we doing gang < talking to no one

#i. want to explode violently #god i told myself this semester id do better but it already feels like im falling behind #fuck me dude #also lowkey forgot how nice wearing my binder feels #like it's like a real tight hug #and i get boobless !!!!#can't wait to #Hurt #in the morning #ill b fine tho i dont have gym anymore itll be all good #< also means i can start dressing cool again #< he didn't wanna get dressed for gym so he just wore like sweatpants or leggings every day #< like a loser #lol #wait what was this post about #oh yeah #fuck algebra btw #damnit dude maths supposed to be ur thang #if you can't even do that you might as well just kys #cmon #oh related kinda ive decided im going into nuclear physisc probably #whicch my mom seems a good bit happier about than me going into education lmao #sighs wistfully #but yeah i mean its interesting enough #plus something something my potential something something the only thing im good at is math #and even that. im getting worse and worse at caring about #cmon alex schools supposed to be your one strength if you stop turningshit in you really have nothing #lmao anyways enough of the emo asss talking to myself #bye

reading ab my fav character wanting to kill themselves is unironically the best way to distract myself from wanting to kill myself

#translation i just found some really good ryuji angst and am going insane #and i still feel like shit but while i was reading it i.#still felt like shit but for ryuji not for me #heart emoji

would you miss me

switching to the vent acc cuz fuck this. anyways. what's even the fucking point anymore. none of my friends like me im not good at anything i cant even keep up my grades anymore so there goes the one thing i was ever able to do right. why shouldnt i just kms!!!!!!!!!!

need to be euthanized tbh

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my stupid fucking thoughts :p