Alice

Mainly about my disorders

[alicemaggot]

“One day you’ll have your own house.” Um no I won’t? I’ll stay here til I die? I’m too dependent to leave?

[alicemaggot]

I hope I can be relatable to you guys :) sorry for not posting, low on ideas

[hpdamechan]

(kinda) jirai (kinda mental disorder focused) shout-out of the day (25) – @alicemaggot

[alicemaggot]

“You choose!” Um um um um IDONT KNOw!!!!! Please tell me what to choose I can’t make decisions on my own..!!

[alicemaggot]

Sometimes I just want someone to see me instead of having to do so much to get attention. Well, my gyrlfriend sees me. I appreciate it. Wish more people would do so too.

[alicemaggot]

Realizing my old relationships were the problem of my depression because I told them I needed attention constantly and they never gave it to me… now that I’m in a healthy romantic one I haven’t been sad as often

[ifuckinghatemyself-chan]

i love attention sm, negative or positive idc

[alicemaggot]

What’s the point of an intro if you could read my posts and see all the curated info I put out to the world… hmmmm

[alicemaggot]

I should probably make an intro post… but those are kinda hard

[hpdamechan]

co-morbid hpd and dpd be like: I want attention but I don’t trust myself to successfully attention seek so I’m going to go back to the same 3 people who are already sick of me

[alicemaggot]

ah yes, my two contradicting views of my trauma.

“I don’t want this to happen again” vs “I wish it was worse and it happened again so I could get more attention and feel more valid”

[alicemaggot]

Anybody with hpd also have social anxiety and/or paranoia? It typically stems from fear of judgement, but I feel kinda left out with some of the criteria for hpd because I either grew out of the behaviors or my social anxiety, regular anxiety, or paranoia was too high to do such things. Mentions of sa below the cut and kind of a trauma dump? I suppose????

When I was younger I was being continuously sexually abused for most of my childhood ranging from 6-10 years old and I used to fit the criteria for the stuff like acting sexual even in inappropriate situations but I no longer feel that because of my anxiety/paranoia around being sexually abused again. Otherwise, I fit almost all of the criteria.

[alicemaggot]

I wanna be known on here or somewhere but my life is too boring to post about anything..

[alicemaggot]

I love my attention person more than anything in the world!

[nofuckingideawho]

if I don't get attention in the next 15 minutes I'll be better off dead

[nofuckingideawho]

not being the centre of attention feels like isolation

[alicemaggot]

Anybody else with hpd get sad whenever they aren’t getting immediate attention? Sometimes I feel.. ok being alone but most of the time I start to spiral into a depressive episode and end up trying to take my life to get attention.