Okay but running with the Nemeton-created-Eli theory is just. Scary as hell but also really funny. Like imagine Stiles and Derek both feeling drawn out to the tree stump, confused as hell as to why they feel like they HAVE to get there, only to find baby Eli full on baby-in-a-basket-style.
So they take him to the station because duh they need to figure out who his parents are, so they run his dna but since his eyes flared they keep it quiet since they don’t think a social worker can handle a werewolf baby
And just who’s dna gets pinged?? None other than the (exonerated) murder suspect Derek Hale AND the delinquent sheriffs son Stiles Stilinski (who’s dad once booked him to try and scare him after he first stole the Jeep when he was like 14 (which definitely did not work))
Noah just reads the results, sighs so hard he nearly breaks something, and then goes to Derek’s loft where he and Stiles are babysitting the kid, and he can hear the bickering and sarcasm before he’s even through the front door
*then Stiles and Derek go on to raise Eli, Stiles decides he doesn’t want to be in the FBI and instead opens up a private investigation business specialising in supernatural shit, they buy a house together, they fall in love, Noah has flashbacks to raising Stiles whenever he babysits Eli and Derek has a family that loves him*
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