this is heartbreaking for me to say, and itâs a decision thatâs been a long, long time coming. I can no longer continue *AMADEUS. I have several reasons for this that Iâll explain, but let me firstly say thank you. I canât thank you all enough for sticking with this project. For your theories, your reblogs, or encouragement, your fanart, your interaction, and most importantly your patience. There arenât words to express how much I owe you all. So thank you.
I am devastated by this decision, but after a lot of stress, thought, and soul-searching, Iâve decided this is for the best for my own mental, emotional, and creative health.
I have completely left the Jacksepticeye following. This was something that happened back in late 2018/early 2019, and I have lots of negative associations with the following now. I donât want to go into details (it was no one personâs fault, donât worry), but my rationale for continuing the comic after that was that I was moving to another arc that Jack wasnât in, and the Jack in the comic was written and based around a version of Sean that was still near and dear to my heart. Now, it remains an awkward situation for me that I donât want to delve into.
On that note: Fanart versus original projects. I donât know how much you know about what has happened, but a key figure in the comic has had some very serious accusations pinned against him, and it has prompted a full rewrite of the Bel Ru Arc, already a very lengthy and complicated story (you can see my previous post for more details). The thing is, I donât want to rewrite the arc. But more importantly than that, this has proved to be a huge wakeup call for me (and almost a sign) that I should finally leave the bulk of my fanart-centered projects behind and move onto original projects instead.
Time restraints. I started *AMADEUS bc I knew it would gather myself a following that would then support my original projects. Now I am at the point where I need to start making decisions about developing my skills in a more professional direction, and creating things for myself. Plus, My colorists have also moved on to their own projects post graduation and for the same reasons (and I wish them nothing but the very, very best!!), so the weight of the pages again fully relies on me. When I start working a ârealâ job, I need what creative time Iâll have to focus on my own projects.
Sparking joy. I love *AMADEUS. I love the story, I love the community, I love the art. I might even say I love creating it, but the truth is I love creating comics, no matter the subject. This project, with all the emotional implications and restraints it puts on me, has evolved from a labor of love to a labor. I am still motivated to give this story what it needs, but I am not in a place to do that.
I know this is probably disappointing to most of you, itâs disappointing to me too, I assure you. So hereâs a few questions you might have, and some final notes:
I have considered a few different ways to continue this, even thru itâs own Patreon tier, releasing all the writings, art, and everything to the open for you all to consume, or putting it up for âadoption,â but at this point I am unsure how or if this would ever happen. I have one batch of pages started, so I might finish and release them still. I might release the full story for the closure, I might keep the âbackgroundâ material for Patreon. I just donât know yet. Of course I will let everyone know.
You probably may wonder how @devil-may-care-series plays into this, since that project has been consuming my mind and energies for the last six months. Honestly, I am much more motivated and invested in that series right now, and Iâve already decided it will be my final âfull-time fanartâ project before fully transitioning to original projects. Iâve grown so much in this series, new skills I never knew I was passionate about, and new and deeper relationships. DMC has not replaced *AMADEUS in my heart and soul, but it will replace it in my creative energies.
I will not be deleting this blog, the prompt-blog, or the playlist. It will stay up for the archive and pages, and I would still like to keep it active. But the exact future of what will be on this blog is still unknown. I donât want to ever end this AmFam, so I donât think Iâll ever permanently âcloseâ the blog. How it will stay alive is another question I donât have answers to.
I may decide to continue to release pages at a much more casual pace, but since there is still 3/4 of the story to go thru, Iâm not sure of the point of this. I still love creating the pages, so itâs something that will happen if it happens. Iâm not making any promises anymore.
I hate to publish this announcement with so many unknowns, but I feel a like I can make much clearer decisions when the pressure and expectations have been lifted. Never from you, but from the weight of my own words and promises.
All I know, in this moment, is that I feel more peace when I consider discontinuing this project than I do excitement when I consider continuing it. And that this is a conversation I have had many times with myself and my closest friends several times over the last two years. Recent developments have only assured me in my decision.
I love you all. I thank you all. And Iâm sorry. I will be launching a Patreon soon, and I hope those of you who enjoy my work will give it a look. When I begin making my own projects, I hope youâll take a look at those as well. I hope you continue to find something that brings you joy, and I hope this comic and the fond memories associated with it will always be one of those things.
With all my love and thanks,
