the silence that passed between them after the spoken words was nearly deafening, but ben had not expected anything else. amani had never been the type to scream and yell in her anger, so he understood her silence, the guilt only gnawing away at him more and more with every passing moment. he had not prepared for this, not at all, not in such an unfortunate circumstance. not once had he even considered the possibility of her return, even when so many others had been revived from death. but she was right when she said the force must hate him. the force and everyone else he seemed to encounter.
finally she spoke, shattering the silence with her soft voice. ben glanced up slowly, still ashamed to meet her gaze, but he forced himself to do so as she moved to her knees before him. he stared at her, still visibly shaken, now even more so at her close proximity. a simple sheet of glass separating them. had it not been there, would she have killed him right then? maybe. maybe he would have let her. at this point, death felt more and more inevitable every day, and in this moment he had never felt so deserving of it. but a small part of him had to keep up the fight. for rey, for his future.Â
he swallowed roughly at her words, his lips separating in disarray. she didnât believe him. she never would. he found himself at a loss for words yet again, a chill running through him at her threat. was that what it was? it made him anxious, but he was reminded that death was already upon him, most likely. would she work to further the process? it wouldnât surprise him. ââŠiâŠâ he wanted to protest, prove that he was sorry somehow, but there was nothing he could do but stare at her. nothing he could say to make this any better. not now.
She brushed the back of her hand up the glass again, shushing him the way a mother might her over-exhausted child; the way she had when they were young and perfect, giggling late at night, sneaking into dark corridors. Better days, better than this. In a way, she wanted to hear him shout at her, bring her back to the very night that ended her everything. Have him declare that she couldnât threaten him if only so that she could use the Force, feel it deep inside herself, and choke him within an inch of his life.
But the speechless was just as nice. Did he feel helpless? She imagined he must. And like a silly girl, the thought wounded her. Her dark eyes wandered the contours of his face-- explored yet unfamiliar regions. Another ache in her chest, reminiscent of a blade of light thrusting into her body. She reached out to him with the Force suddenly, an invisible hand curling its index finger and then flicking his right ear.Â
Despite herself, she giggled.Â
âOh, donât be so sad, Master. The time for that comes later,â she told him as she stood, smoothing her dressâs billowy skirts with a hand. She turned on her heel and threw him a glance over her regal shoulder. âSmile for me instead, wonât you?âÂ
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