amethyst archive

currently obsessed with bsd, will post about anything, she/her(I don't mind "they")

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Dazai is laying flat, eyes closed, in a peaceful, dreamy state surrounded by crimson camellias (the flower language for profound longing and passion). Chuuya is hovering over him like he is caring for him but Chuuya is not looking at him I think it is because that would be too even gayer they are always masking their care underneath harsh words(this makes their interactions extremely human to eo), so it does not fit to be direct. And just look at the Atmosphere. It can be used as a poster for a romance novel.

First off, they are holding hands?! Like, these two are always hiding how much they matter to eo in their interactions. This picture is quite the opposite of the other one, here Chuuya lays down in a peaceful, dreamy state while Dazai is the one with his calculated mind being there for Chuuya. Their hands are tied together by the red string on fate which symbolizes their souls being tied to each other forever.

I especially like this one because Chuuya is looking away, extending the snack to Dazai and Dazai and Dazai has a genuine, warm smile on his face. I think it symbolizes how much Chuuya really cares for Dazai but also wants to hide it(by looking away) or even that despite the fact that Dazai left the PM, Chuuya still cares about him(beyond his partner).

In all of these artworks, I think the atmosphere is dreamy and soft. It looks loving and intimate. I also think it is exclusively romantic. This frame is not used for any platonic bonds like Shin Soukoku who are also considered characters who complete eo. It does not have any romantic elements even though it has emotional elements(sharing snacks, standing side by side without any soft, intimate gaze or positioning.)

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Now that I think about it, Chuuya is so smart he can see Dazai's tricks very easily. So he probably have been faking having huge reactions to Dazai because he knows that stimulates Dazai and makes him feel a little human. I mean, just seeing Dazai annoys him so much it probably is a way of making Dazai feel more alive in their interactions since we also know that Dazai starts to think of living after interacting with Chuuya.

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This scene melts my heart. Fukuzawa was the first person to give Rampo understanding and care anf help him recover from the isolation and self blame he felt. In this scene, he felt so overwhelmed by the fact that someone understood and cared for him that much. He also did not want to offend Fukuzawa.

Rampo waiting by Fukuzawa's bed for him to wake up

Rampo used to be so scared of everyone else because he thought everyone saw the details he did. It scared him that everyone chose to ignore these these details and it made him feel alone and others are "monsters". He also blamed himself for this feeling but Fukuzawa helped him get through all this by just giving him a logical framework that people are just not as smart and it is his job to help others with his "ability". Fukuzawa gave him the glasses as a way of making him feel that he has control over the powers and he can simply not detect all these details when he doesn't need to and can feel like he can fit in for a while.

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Atsushi is such a sad character to me. Imagine feeling like YOU DON'T DESERVE TO LIVE because you have been told that so much by others. So much that you feel like you need to earn the reason to live by proving to people who told you "you make the world a bad place to live in" that he can make the world a better place. Even though you want to do that your mind keeps telling you that you cannot and you are destined to perish. But you use your last bit of strength and self respect to fight hard to earn your reason to live by helping others. You go through a journey of controlling and learning better and better till you finally heal. Each time you succeed your confidence increases.

That is why he clashes so much with Akutagawa even though they are both searching for a reason to live. Akutagawa thinks it is earned by proving that you are stronger than everyone by killing them and earning Dazai's approval through it while Atsushi is quiet the opposite.

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Dazai calling himself "snow white" in this scene? So basically he is implying Chuuya is his prince ? Its like he was implying a kiss might have been better. Also their trust in each other is immense and also Dazai is happy that Chuuya trusted him so much. They also really know each other so much. Look at how much they predicted each other.

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In the dead apple movie, Chuuya and Dazai could have collapsed side-by-side like exhausted battlefield comrades, Chuuya could have just face-planted into the dirt next to him, He could have fallen across Dazai's chest or shoulder, instead where the hell did he fall down? CHUUYA FELL DOWN INBETWEEN DAZAI'S THIGHS. Like, that was not out of nowhere, the animators chose to draw it like that. And there still will be people who say, "they are platonic best friends/brothers"

Dazai also tries to push him back into this intimate position. Resting a comforting hand on Chuuya's hair.

He has a soft expression this whole scene the atmosphere turns into a soft, calm lighting(like a romance scene).

This is how they look from an angle.

So... They are definitely platonic besties/brothers. Nothing gay here.

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Chuuya has to be the most important person in Dazai's life at this point. Dazai is trying to get things that would stimulate him and give him meaning. Where does he get that from? Chuuya because he really annoys him and he clashes with Dazai. It makes him frustrated, amused, basically feel emotions. You also see that during that time, Dazai only joked or interacted like a human with Chuuya. He still does not get a meaning from Chuuya but I feel like this might be also why Dazai became more curious to try to find a meaning. I think this is also where he found out that he enjoys the emotions he feels from annoying people. Also Chuuya is extremely easy to get a big reaction out of(more reasons why Soukoku is compatible).

I think the reason why Dazai and Chuuya hated each other at first is because Dazai was like "this guy just jumps into conclusions and has anger issues" and that's a nightmare for a strategist like him while Chuuya is like "this guys is a suicide maniac not committed to anything" but they are actually super compatible because Dazai is a strategist while Chuuya is an executioner. They are just unstoppable together.

Also they really really care about each other too. Like, when Dazai gets hurt Chuuya is so worried. They had just normalised speaking this way to each other. Also that Chuuya sees Dazai's unlocks the human side of Dazai while Dazai gets perfect reactions out of Chuuya. Their relationship is exclusive.

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I have not watched the whole story of bsd but I have to write down what I think of Dazai(I finished 2 seasons of the anime). I mostly think that his emotional state which I would say resembles clinical depression connects into many details and aspects into his personality and past.

I assume that he went through a lot of hardships in the past which probably made him quiet emotionally numb because when you go through a lot your brain shuts down emotional responses like fear or pain or even happiness. This shows up in how non chalant and apathetic Dazai was during the time he joined the port mafia. He also did not care about morals the reason for that probably was that when your brain is numb to emotions, it probably also numbs your brain from other people's emotions and makes you lack empathy. Even during this time Dazai is searching for a reason to live and is curious even tho he is completely not amused by life anymore.

He is an intellectual. One thing about intellectual philosphers like him is that they crave stimulation in their brains which prevents him from giving up completely. This is probably why he also joined the Port Maifia because he wants to activate his brain and is detached from good/bad. He wants to experience things that can ignite his brain again. Being around danger and carrying out operations can activate your brain and he is in desperate need of it. His brain orobably got its stimulation from joining the port mafia but there was still one thing missing that he cannot still feel like he is a human.

(This scene is such a contrast to how he treats Atsushi)

Stimulation alone is not enough to do that, there needs to be meaning to the stimulation(especially for a philosphical character like him). Then while with the port mafia, he finally finds a pathway in which he could find the answers to these questions. Which is from Oda Sakunoske who hadbthings he wanted to work and live for. This made Dazai tune into Sakunoske and he was told that Dazai can most probably find the answer to it if he saved humans. I think what is meant by their conversation is that. Life is something that humans understand and live for. It is repeated a lot by many characters like Akutagawa that cruel people are dead. So in order to understand humans you need to empathise and save them. Then Dazai joined the special investigation unit where he saves people.

There is a very good change after joining the special investigation. He is improving by giving his brain activation from solving mysteries, joking, flirting, pissing of Kunikida, and later Chuuya rather than surrounding himself from around just gore. This way he gets more and more into people and their lives which assists him in his goal to have meaning in life.

(This is also why he saved Atsushi and is so kind, compare that to Akutagawa and Dazai)

You can also see that he still is not fully feeling every emotion and is still obsessed with suiciding. But as the course of the series I noticed that he talks less and less of suicide. He gets better and better at being ansurd. Dazai is someone who has innate intellectual but funny nature which is why dealt with his life the way he is. Hopefully, by the end of the series he can feel like a normal human being and have a great life!

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I love how the scene were Chuuya and Dazai meet is so cool because it is pretty subtextual. They look like enemies who don't give a damn about each other at a glance but on a second glance, THEY KNOW EACH OTHER TOO MUCH! Like they predict each other, understand eo's humor and also doesn't Chuuya let him go?

One of the things that actually shows that they really do care about each other is that they understand each other's humor. To understand someone's humor, you need to be really tuned into them emotionally. Also, the fact that Chuuya lets Dazai complete what he came there for also shows that.

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Explaining Wei Wuxian's characteristics

1. He always jokes around and is quiet saracastic:

He had always been treated like a servants son in the Jiang Family to some extent and joking around is probably how he had always coped with a difficult situation, by reducing the seriousness of the situation by joking.

2. Him being really into bringing justice to the world:

Wei Wuxian is very good at logically thinking. He can analyse sociological dynamics pretty and can understand how unfair certain things in society are + he is empathetic enough to understand how it is like to be treated unfairly.

3. He is so oblivious to his own feelings:

WWX was not oblivious to his feelings but he subconsciously ignored processing his feelings because he thought Lan Wangji disliked him in his first life. He did not want to think about or process the hurt of wanting approval and love from someone who rejects you.

4. He does not care about what society says about him:

He had grown up with Yu Ziyuan always criticizing him and Jiang Fengmian supporting his actions. Since he knows Yu Ziyuan hates him, he had mostly listened to Jiang FengMian's support and learned to trust himself despite the people who hate him.

5. Him pestering his crush:

It is because he really wants Lan Wangji's attention but if he approaches LWJ in a straightforward manner, LWJ will shut him down and he will feel pretty rejected. So to make it look unserious to both himself and LWJ he jokes and pesters instead.

6. Not valuing himself:

This probably is a culture and environment. In the MDZS world, adopted children are expected to forever devote their life to their adopted parents as a symbol of gratitude. He had also been belittled in the Jiang family by Jiang Cheng sometimes calling him a "bastard", Jisng Fengmian obligating him to protect Jiang Yanli and Jiang Cheng, Yu Ziyuan always treating him like a servsnt, etc. He had probably leatned to value himself less.

[lgbtqiatext]

[delesaria-blog]

Japanese BLs always do this to me. They lure me in with the sweetness, increasing cuteness every episode, then hit me in the face with trauma. I fall for the formula every time-

1. Longing glances

2. Giving solace

4. Fluffy moments

5. Growing intimacy

6. Laughter

7. Tears

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Chiaki wears punks fashion because it helps him be less anxious(if you haven't noticed, he gets anxious with a lot of people and he touches his lip piercing when anxious and dressing like Ai makes him feel so confident because he views Ai as confident and cool) because now people perceive him as unapproachable(remember his classmates talking about him in ep1) and they don't approach him and THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT HE WANTS! he thinks everyone is his competition and he doesn't want to be close to them and also he doesn't want to deal with the social anxiety of dealing with people.

Enaga also wore punks fashion as a way to make himself look unapproachable, as a result, making people avoid him and not give him attention. Also, he uses his very "unimpressive" look as Enaga, also so that no one gives him any special attention now that he gets attention for dressing punk as he is a model. The thing here is both of them are quiet different from what their appearance suggests and they are using fashion to control what others think about them and navigate social situations. It is a fascinating idea that the way you dress can be used as a mechanism to navigate your social life because people judge or/and make assumptions very quickly.

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idk if you're still looking eng subs on "led astray by love", but here's the archive link i watched at: https://archive.org/details/eng-sub-led-astray-by-love-full-series

Thank you so much!

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Here are the actors from "The Untamed", that I am blown away by (this os not entirely ranked):

1. Wang Yibo (Lan Wangji) - LWJ is supposed to have no expressions in his face and this character is so hard to portray without making it look plain but WYB's microexpressions did it so well! Lan Wangji's emotions are portrayed through very minute changes in his face which conveys LWJ's feelinfs while still showing the audience how repressed he is. I can't be the only one who stares at LWJ's expressions more than anyone else's.

2. Zhu Zanjin (Jin Guangyao): He has layers of expressions in his face. There would be 0.5 sec leak of his true emotions and then his fake emotion on the outside. That is so cool! I loved this so much. Those dimples also make him look extra sweet and innocent!

3. Xiao Zhan (Wei Wuxian): What is so cool about his acting is that, Wei Wuxian goes through a lot of changes throughout this series shaped by his experiences but his emotions were portrayed so well connectedly that all of it felt like the same person. I feel that the teen WWX, YLZ and 2nd life WWX are all different in demeanour and behaviour but they are all interconnected and I think the biggest challenge here is to portray all of them without making them feel likedifferent people and XZ does it so well!

4. Song Jiyang (Xiao XingChen): Well, the thing that blowed me away about this actor is when he had to act as Xue Yang duribg Yi City. He literally felt like Xue Yang so much that, I felt no difference between them accept for the looks.

Overall, I think all actors in this drama were perfect for their roles but I feel like these performances just stood out.

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Why is LWJ crying so aesthetic? Him showing emotions are all about WWX and that just makes it so romantic. That is why LWJ is being himself when he is around WWX. They makeme believe love can be so beautiful ❤️

[8lu4ee]

MuQing x MuQing🥰

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Possible ship names include:

MuMu

QingQing

MuQi

Mu^2

Qing^2