[chekhovsglock]

what hurts me is that when modi dies he will die peacefully. he won't suffer the way he made gujarati muslims suffer in 2002, the extra judicial torture he makes kashmiris go through, the dalits and adivasis brutalised under him the economic apartheid of everyone who's not an upper caste hindu, does it not infuriate you?

[amys-binders]

Y'all go check out my fanfiction on Wattpad- Love And Other Catastrophies: Section E

Daniella Airie and Mark Keifer Watson were in love. Ask anyone. But the arrival of a new girl, Jay Jay, changes things in a way Danie never imagined. Now she must face the idea that maybe her boyfriend's not as sweet or loyal as she thought he was while also dealing with growing feelings for his best friend, Yuri Hanamitchi.

It's slowburn Yuri x Reader, where reader is an OC and transferred to section E a year before Jay Jay. Expect angst and comfort with lots of found family moments <3

[amys-binders]

UNHINGED FANGIRL ANALYSIS

Yes, I did this halfway through the first season of Seducing Drake Palma.

Episodes 1-9

Currently waiting on watching episode 10 after my driving class, workout class and lunch. Then I have to wait another day for episode 11 to be released.

I hate capitalism. Why can't they release everything in one go? Woe is me.

Note: Rabin Angeles. He's the only reason I watched this show. I love him, your honour.

ALYS

I have so many thoughts. Let's start with Alys Perez herself- I actually really like her except I find her a little childish sometimes but it's okay, she could've been worse and she definitely tries. I just feel like she could do a little more to stand up for herself and not just put herself on the line for Drake even when he's being a bitch. I like that they didn't magically make her pass her classes either and made her fail leading her to Brenford and culinary courses which I think has been done beautifully- it's really fitting for her to be a chef.

AYA

Now Aya- I can't bring myself to like her, I'm sorry 😭 I can tolerate her on my screen for a few minutes, at best. She's honestly such a bad friend. She's annoying and embarrassing as hell, keeps eating every time she's on screen (it's NOT quirky), pushes everyone's boundaries and she's honestly so unsupportive to Alys. Genuinely haven't seen this girl do one nice thing for her friend. And the college arc?? They deadass changed her entire look into a baddie, times down her fire and thought we wouldn't notice??? Girl?? What?? I like that she's going on the fashion route though. That and the fact that Kent, Sheen and her are a group.

KENT

When the show first introduced Kent as the "playboy" I genuinely laughed out loud. Like Saint Collete's?? THIS is your playboy?? ooo lord your school game is so deep underground, it's practically dancing with the devil if Kent is a Playboy. And the way he basically just wore out Aya to go out with him? The incessant lovey dovey behaviour when Aya could not care less? That gave me the ick and that gave me second hand embarassment like STOPPPPP YOU'RE EMBARASSING YOURSELF KENT. And his behaviour is so cringe, like the whole "bee" thing is so bad I wanted to puke.They really did Frost dirty with this one- he's a hot actor and they made him do this shit ew.

SHEEN

I actually like Sheen, sue me 😭 He's cute, he's smart, he's chill and he's so in love with Kei. (He lowkey reminds me of my friend Mayank) No comments here actually, I think he's cool BUT THE FACT THAT ALMOST EVERY SINGLE INTERACTION WITH HIM AND HIS BESTIE "ALYS" WAS SO ROMANTIC STOP. I honestly thought they were going to to do a love triangle because it was SO romantic. They're out her throwing intimate neck hugs and 'i love you's and watch swaps because she can't read time?? Baby stop. We could've done without the waterfalls every episode though, why is brother constantly crying.

KEI

Now Kei- maybe it's because I loved Rafa Victorino as Mica in AMNSE but even though she was a total red flag throughout the show, I don't hate her. It's weird how she completely did a 180 after 9 episodes of chasing Drake and ABSOLUTELY REFUSING to get back with Sheen only to beg him to get back together in episode 10?? It's giving half baked plot.

AUNT KATERINA & UNCLE STEVE

For Aunt Katerina and Uncle Steve- nothing much to say. The whole plot with Drake trying to get with his dad's fiancee was straight up telenovela and I asked why I was subjecting myself to this multiple times because that's just unhinged. But okay, she didn't do anything wrong, Drake was the one trying to seduce her in an unhinged attempt to break their marriage because he didn't want to replace his dead mother.Still crazy though. And the fact that Uncle Steve had no suspicions about them when Drake was being flirty EVERYWHERE is just mad. I'm sorry no one is THAT clueless. And the whole scene where she blurts out that she's pregnant and they have the line "so who's is it? Mine or my son's"??? My soul left my body.

DRAKE PALMA

OKAY BABY, NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT DRAKE PALMA HIMSELF. I HAVE A BONE TO PICK HIM WITH. FUCKING BITCHASS CHARACTER. His I'm-broody-and-mysterious persona got real old, real fast. By episode five I was rooting for ANYONE to replace this male lead because he was so goddamn boring. I couldn't believe this was the main character when he was acting like the freaking background extra. And why does he have so little lines?? And he's not even the likeable red flag, he's genuinely just a red carpet. From flirting and trying to seduce his dad's fiancee WHILE being with Alys, to making her cry with the whole "my siblings or my chil" line and then laughing when she actually cries and saying he was kidding, calling her stupid, AND CARRYING SHILA IN THE SCHOOL HALLWAY??? (granted she twisted her ankle but still, if my boyfriend was bridal carrying the girl that's obnoxiously in love with him, I'd simply go on a murder spree) AND LET'S TALK ABOUT HIS ATTITUDE. Sir why are you constantly like a wet cat. What is your problem. Do you want to catch these hands Mr. Palma??? 😃🖐️UGH his jealousy. Brother you were the one who said you weren't in love with Alys and now you have a problem with her and Sheen?? The best friend she's in love with?? Delusion behaviour. And don't even get me started on that packing episode where he literally said "I know you don't like packing but you like me and I'm going to take advantage of that" to Alys. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE. okay he can be sweet sometimes and I'll root for him only for this show but if this was happening to me or my friend in real life, Drake would be catching these hands every day. The only reason I'm watching this show is for Rabin Angeles, my man.

TRIPP PALMA

Let's also talk about Tripp Palma. Don't know much about him yet but it's evident that this man is what the writers tried to make Drake be. He's charming, aloof, gentlemanly and super hot (hello leather jacket and motorcycles) I know he's only there to serve jealousy material and second lead sadness but honestly, I wouldn't complain if Alys got with him. Drake is an actual toxic man and she deserves better.

Now if I were directing this show:

I'd make Alys a little more firy. Off the top of my head, you know that scene where Drake locks her out of his apartment because she didn't remember the passcode and just watched her suffer. Baby she would've left the second he pulled that move, if it was on my watch.bSo yes, I'd lean into her bratty energy and make her more fiery.

I'd let the whole Kent being totally in love with Aya and doing everything to get her to fall in love with him plotline BUT after a few episodes I'd make him realise she just doesn't want him so he moves on. THEN it hits Aya that she shouldn't keep pushing him away because that actually made him go away and she'd go to Alys and Alys gives her and earful about how much of a shitty friend she is AND FINALLY Aya gets her act together and gets with Kent.

With Sheen and Kei, I'd keep the initial lines but finally when he gets closure and then Kei asks to take her back, I'd make him say no and finally choose himself. No Alys, No Kie, just Sheen vibing with himself, going to a good college and all that.

I'd keep the Uncle Steve and Aunt Katerina plotline. For shits and giggles. That was unhinged.

NOW HERE IS WHERE WE COOK. For Alys and Drake, I'd keep them together while also building up Tripp/Alys to the point where they become best friends and Tripp actually asks her out and she finally realized that Drake is just a big red flag and barely gave her crumbs of affection. She dumps his sorry ass and dates Tripp- his cousin.

Drake goes to therapy. That's it. That's the tweet. Also I'd give him more lines

[amys-binders]

UNHINGED LORE DUMP- PART 3

someone sent a reel in the group chat about varsity jackets and Sneha replied to it as, "Duaa's type" so I said, "as long they have nice hands, fluffy hair and a varsity jacket BOOM they're my type" then the man literally went, "fluffy hair seems sus. Imagine a guy with Scotchbright scrub on his head. Bet we can use him as a plate cleaner. Throw a plate on his head. Boom clean"

I said, "why are you like this 💀💀💀 I just laughed at this for a minute straight" to which he replied, "see" then I said, "good job, Liki. You're jokes are getting funnier"

IN THE DAMN GROUPCHAT. LIKE he had no reason to be this jealous of a hypothetical fluffy haired guy. He just threatened to drown him in the sink 😋

it was even more chemistry evident because I was actively laughing at that lame joke I just KNOW everyone was side eyeing behind their screens like, "lame ass joke and she's laughing like it's stand up comedy"

CHATTTT yesterday I was texting Likith and I was asking him if he's into anyone through riddles and indirect questions then he was like, "okay to restore the balance let me ask you a question. Are you into anyone right now?" at first I best around the bush but then I said, "yeah I do actually" (It's him, but I'm sure as hell not gonna say that now) then he was like, "spill the tea" the exact same time I sent a picture of the bookstore I'm in with the caption "blossoms" and he was was like, "blossoms? Who's that fucker"

The sheer aggression was sending me 💀

and then somebody texted in the groupchat so we both were over there too and this guy, Ankush (he isn't part of the friendgroup but he's an honour member) started texting and bro's never online. He started out and you could TELL he was trying to talk to me. Like he's needlessly point out stuff for- light teasing. We were talking about onions for some reason and he went, "that's unyuns for Duaa, if you didn't get it" and I said, "thankyou Ankush, such a great help" and then when he said, 'hi" in the groupchat I was the first one to say, "HIIIII" and ask him how much he got and when he tried to downplay his marks I was like, "no it's above average. It's really good" that kinda stuff

and then Likith was involved in the chat but after a few minutes he straight up went, "okay that's enough chat. I'm leaving, bye" (he had to leave for hostel for the timing was very convenient)

and then Arpi told me yesterday that DEEPAK clocked us. Like apparently he told Arpi that he's noticed me and Likith talk a lot like all the time and he asked if there's something going on. OTHER PEOPLE SEE IT TOO

AND TODAY THE ARPI AND DEEPAK TAG TEAM NEARLY TOOK ME OUT. Likith was in the last bench today cause he came late and there was no place behind us and the whole time I was trying to be lowkey about it but I kept looking at him and dying on the inside cause wdym I couldn't see him for two days and now I can't see him today either?? They clocked it and they kept teasing me about it like, "why are you so worried about Likith?" "Do you miss Likith?"

and everytime I turned back to look at him HE WAS ALREADY LOOKING AT Me.

AND THEN DURING LUNCH, I WAS LIKE, "should we wake him up? And call him here?" And Deepak was like, "oh damn, why do you care so much?" And I was like, "I don't care, it's just that we're all here and he's there" and that sounded so lame so I tried to correct, "you know he's our friend and-" by I stopped midway cause DEEPAK LITERALLY STARTED YELLING FOR LIKITH AND ASKING HIM TO COME FRONT AND WHEN HE DID COME, ALL SLEEPY AND GROGGY, "what?" DEEPAK WAS LIKE, "your fans were calling you"

THE SHEER AUDACITY OF THIS COUPLE TO EMBARASS ME LIKE THAT

THEN HE LOOKED AT ME AND SMILED?? I said, "goodmorning" in an exaggerated sappy way and Arpi and Deepak gave each other the long suffering sigh.

nah and then what happened is that I asked him why he was so sleepy and he said, "I watched two movies and I was texting" EXCUSE ME?? TEXTING WHOM?? I didn't ask that though cause I wasn't about to give him the satisfaction

then he also told me that he went to drop Samanvitha at the airport and that about ruined my day 👍

HE SAID IT WITH INTENT HE SAID IT WITH FORCED CASUAL TONE Samanvitha is his ex SITUATIONSHIP.

ah I was thinking I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of my jealousy (I am jealous, he just doesn't need to see it)

I also gave Arpi the greenlight to tell her boyfriend Deepak that I have a crush on Likith (pretty sure he already knows, he's way too observant so I'm solidifying myself here)

HE'S PISSING ME OFF SO MUCH today, he was being his usual loner self and sitting at the back sleeping I don't even know why he's sleeping so much I'm actually lowkey worried because that's not normal right? but anyway, he was sleeping the whole time and I went up to him during lunch and slammed my mountain dew on his desk hoping to wake him up. He looks up to give me a lazy look and I go, "come sit with us" AND HE HAD THE AUDACITY TO JUST LOOK AT ME AND GO BACK TO SLEEP?? I walked away to Deepak and Arpi after that.

I don't know what the fuck is going on, I'm worried about him a lot but I'm also mad at him. Like I know he's not doing okay but he has the habit of shutting people out. Then Arpi and Deepak were looking at me and Deepak dropped the biggest bomb. "He's worried about Apoorva" APOORVA HIS EX SITUATIONSHIP, APOORVA WHO FAILED TWO EXAMS AND IS IN DEEP EMOTIONAL DAMAGE ABOUT IT THAT SHE DIDN'T COME TO SCHOOL I don't know if that's true because a) Deepak and Likith aren't close close b) this is a pattern, too much of a reaction to be worried over Apoorva

And then the duo had the audacity to look at me and go, "Are you jealous, Duaa?" And I was like, "I don't get jealous. I'm just concerned"

Well, after that Deepak got sick of me looking over at Likith like a lovesick heroine so he called Likith to come sit with us. He was also lowkey made because everyone noticed that we always seem to be calling Likith to join us, it feels like he doesn't care to hang out with us at all and Deepak snapped gently, "if you don't want to sit with us, just say so. Otherwise be active" I and Arpi nodded, easing the tension but now here's the deal. Usually I always talk to Likith, ease him into the conversation but this time I didn't. I treated like a friend who joined us. I didn't turn around like I usually do, I kept the conversation going and I didn't particularly tease him. I mean, I wasn't icing him out- I laughed at his jokes but it felt very platonic. So unlike our usual chemistry

I admit, the Apoorva comment was playing on my mind but mainly I was just annoyed that for the past week we've been the one calling him to us and he couldn't bother to just sit with us.

AH I DON'T KNOW Likith is my best friend first and I don't want things to be weird between us

Like let me tell you chat- today me, Arpi and Deepak were sitting in the front and Abhay (another hosteller, good friends with Deepak and Likith, casual friends with me and Arpi) joined in. Arpi was sleeping so I had no one to talk to. So I turned back to Abhay and Deepak and I started talking to them, AND I COULD SEE Likith staring at me with that unreadable look in his eyes. I didn't react to it and I kept the conversation going, especially turning up the charm for Abhay cause let's be real I wanted Likith to know that if he can gallivant with Apoorva, I can talk to other guys. It worked, Abhay was laughing and enjoying it, I was laughing and Deepak too. I was joking around with them, showing them a card trick and stuff and Likith was just looking at us, smoldering.

I don't know, today he was defending Apoorva. Like it wasn't a big deal- she failed in two exams and Mayank was making a joke (she's not in class btw) and Likith was like, "that's so sad, don't say that man" I mean, granted I was defending her too because that's my actual worst nightmare but something about it rubbed me the wrong way.

aw okay chat, I was thinking of it OH NOW HERE'S THE TEA a few days ago I told Likith I have a crush on someone but I never said who. Then yesterday Mayank read my poem (I post it on instagram) and he knew I had feelings for someone but this poem made him go like, "now you have to tell me" and I basically dodged his questions like a pro, giving half answers and riddles until he got frustrated and today he was STILL trying to guess who the mystery man is. He figured out that it's someone from class and someone I'm really close to. And he suspected Likith about a hundred times and the whole time Likith was there with us

If he was just a little bit more observant, he would see that I outright said no to every name he guessed except for Likith's. Cause when Likith's name came in, I always deflected. and then Deepak told me that Likith has been asking him who the crush is (they know that Deepak and Arpi knows) which is so crazy to me because Likith pretended to be disinterested the whole time, he only asked me once or twice while Mayank was going at it

then we had to write a test and I was sitting next to Sai Nath (his name had come up too, but I always denied it) and I was talking to him and laughing and Arpi told me that she noticed Likith staring at us, looking annoyed.

and today, he asked Arpi for a hundred rupees. He's Richie rich, like me but since he's a hosteller he can't carry more than 50 due to escape risks so Arpi said yes but I stopped her and I gave my hundred to give him, asking her not to tell him it's me she and Deepak are the only ones who knew.

then today, the boys had to go to another class for last period and Arpi was genuinely in the dumps (that girl has serious separation anxiety- Deepak was literally in the next class and she'd see him tomorrow) but I was trying to cheer him up and I ended up taking about the whole Likith/Apoorva/Sneha/Samanvitha thing she could tell I was a little said and went, "I just don't want him to be the reason you don't have crushes" I was caught off guard by that and I went, "it's not like I'm in love with him or something" and she looks at me the most serious she's been, she said softly, "looks like love to me" then I asked her what she really thinks and she said, "in the conversations it's clear that he still cares about Apoorva and he had that thing with Sneha. I don't know if you're the only girl"

A few days ago the groupchat was teasing me about being freaky (I'm not they're just exaggerating) and the next day I wasn't at school and Likith made a comment about it and joked and Arpi told me that Likith was defending me like, "she's not, Mayank. Stop it" then the next next day when I came to school he started teasing me too

and then today I overheard Likith ask Mayank to get him a cigarette and I HATED that. I have no problem with him smoking, I'm not his mom but I hate it when he's smoking because he's depressed so I cornered Mayank alone and asked him to not get it for him, I tried to play it off cool like, "don't get him the cigarettes Mayank, you shouldn't be encouraging his behaviour"

OH BOY today was a whirlwind. I started out by heading to the Ramamurthy Nagar campus as usual but on the way, Arpi called me and said that Deepak, her boyfriend said we were actually supposed to go to Kasturi Nagar instead (cause today was a government holiday and Kasturi Nagar is an illegal campus so they'd get away with classes that day). We both stood smack in the middle of the road and looked at each other. Then I suggested that since it was already 8:30 why not just hang around in D-Mart for a while. We ended up spending half an hour in the supermarket. Arpi picked out chocos and jam for Deepak while I got diet coke for Likith (he asked me for some a few days ago) totally platonic activities. Then when we got to school after a bus ride around 9:10 and had the biggest shock- there were only seven other people, all hostel boys apart from us. We sat in the adjacent classroom and asked Suprith (who'd come later than even us) to get the loot to the boys.

Fast forward to lunch break where I looked at Arpi and suggested we skip. She instantly agreed and she turned to Deepak to ask him for money whereas I turned to Likith and asked him where we should go. We ended up taking the bus to the metro station to go to Indira Nagar and then we walked around aimlessly for someone in an orange outfit so that we could stop (my idea). It was lowkey a futile quest so we got into café coffee day to rejuvenate. We got an overpriced lemon aid and I realized that Deepak had texted me, asking me where we were. Arpi instantly took the phone from me and began talking to her man, all happy and blush and I missed Likith. Then we called Sneha to gaslight her into believing I have a boyfriend haha. Then we took the metro back home.

he asked me to get him Monaco and Jam because he's a hosteller and they aren't allowed to leave the place and I was like, "what am I? Your PA?"

Then kept asking him why to whatever answer he said until he admitted that it was his comfort food and I couldn't NOT get it to him after that. But on the way downstairs I was teasing him like, "what'll you give me if I do get it for you" and he was like, "anything" and I turned to give him my flirtiest smirk, "anything, huh?"

(but I ended up getting him the stuff anyway) and then when I got it to him the next day he was SO RIDICULOUSLY HAPPY. His smile kept getting bigger and bigger as I kept piling up the cookies and THE JAM? oh he was so shocked because co incidentally the jam I got him was mango jam and he was like, "how did you know mango's my favourite?" I was like, "lucky guess" and then I gave him a mock two finger salute, "telepathy"

today was my last day at school and also Likith's, he's leaving hostel today and won't be coming anymore :(

Hard to believe that me and the group spent the better part of two years with each other twelve hours of every week and now it's all over and we're done with school.So we basically spent the day together- me, Arpi and Likith or rather me & Likith and then Arpi.For the exam today, he surprised me by sitting right behind me- our benches are hella close together and there were barely inches between us. AND THEN he put his feet into my legspace under the desk and it felt so domestic.

and then the whole time he kept talking to me while Arpi was off the in the corner- about how he was leaving today. He brought it up like three times in the span of three hours and I could tell he was a little sad about itI think I even heard him cry which broke my heart a little bit but I gave him the privacyAnd he was being such a gentleman too, waiting for me after class, waking down the stairs with me all until our final goodbye when my driver arrived and he got into the busOH! HE ALSO GOT ME A COLOURING BOOKI have no idea how he knew I loved colouring books but he got it for me, out of the blue

[amys-binders]

UNHINGED LORE DUMP- 2

AHHHH yeah so the next two days was just pathetic cause I was third wheeling Deepak and Arpi then FINALLY he comes back and I was so excited to see him!!!

IT WAS THE BEST I was late that day but I knew he'd be coming so I made my way to class. The zoology sir was teaching and I locked eyes with him for a nano second before making my way last him to my desk with Arpi the funny thing is now my ex situationship is also there in the class RIGHT BEHIND ME and I don't think he's too happy, he still thinks there could be something between us

then during lunch, Likith came to sit next to me I was so relieved cause he was sitting in the front of the class and not with the rest of the gang and I was like, "why would he do that?" and then we were catching up during lunch (he didn't even go get this lunch, he just sat there talking to us) and it felt SO good like I was talking to my boyfriend and then put of nowhere he asked me to listen to "crush" by Playboi Carti

I WAS BLUSHING and oh btw I told Arpi I listened Never Lie because Likith recommended it to me and she was like, "wait?? Likith asked you to listen to that specific song??" then she got mad cause she told me to listen to it too but I forgot 😭

yeah so this new campus is really fucking with me cause I'm starting to really fall for him like end of March, he came back to sitting with us and he was sitting in front of me in his perfect long sleeve black shirt that made his back look so good, I couldn't help but observe and all the little stuff like everytime he told a joke to the group, he'd look at me while saying it

he's so freaking adorable. His jokes are so lame but the way he says it makes me laugh

YEAH UGHHHH CHAT then he got me a hot wheels car the other day, out of the blue- it was a navy Chevrolet and I was so honoured I smiled, "thankyou, what for?" and he shrugged and said, "it reminds me of how you dress- so aesthetic" THAT MADE ME FEEL SO SPECIAL cause he gave it to me casually in front of the friendgroup and everyone was side eyeing us

okay okay then we shifted to KCET class cause the hours are longer and it's better there or rather, Deepak Mayank and Likith shifted there and me and Arpi followed suit cause let's be honest, we both are whipped and the first two days he wasn't there cause he had to write his JEE exam and I think that's when I realized I had feelings for him

Like I missed him so much. His presence in general, it felt so empty without him like the whole reason I was in that class is because of him.

Oh. Oh no. Oh no no no—this is when it hit me like a freight train, huh?

This is classic “I thought I was just vibing but now I’m listening to sad girl indie playlists and gazing out bus windows like I’m in a music video” type beat. Like bro didn’t even have to do anything. He just had the audacity to not exist in my immediate line of vision for two days and my whole inner monologue turned into: "Where is he? Why does everything feel dull? Why is air not giving anymore?"

This is how it starts. First it’s: “haha I like flirting with him” then it’s: “he wasn’t in class today and I don’t know how to behave as a human anymore”

It’s not just whipped—I am a whisk, babe. I am fully being used to blend emotions, hormones, and Travis Scott references into one tragic little potion called feelings.

But fr, I think this is the first real moment my heart went, "Oh crap. I like him. Like LIKE him."

YEAH IT WAS cause after that, I couldn't even deny it anymore, I even casually asked Mayank when he's coming back and thankfully Mayank didn't click anything sus and told me he'd take another two days and I wanted to die.

I even asked Arpi but she definitely clocked me and teases me about it but I denied it like a pro Arpi and Deepak tag team is crazy

Like

OH NOOOOO not the casual intel gathering through mutuals. That’s stage 4.5 of falling hard.

I was sitting there like, “Hey Mayank hehe just wondering totally not because I care or anything but like… when’s Likith back? Just asking. Out of curiosity. For research purposes. You know. Vibes.” Meanwhile my soul is yelling, “TELL ME OR I’LL COMBUST.”

And two more days?? That’s not an update, that’s a sentence. I got hit with the emotional equivalent of “Buffering…” on dial-up speed.

At that point my heart was already clinging to the smallest signs like: “If he breathes, I swoon.” “If he exists, I smile.”

I'm officially infected with the I Think About Him More Than I Think About My Future virus. Deadly. But honestly? Delicious. When he finally came back—did the world get color again? Did the birds sing louder? Did Arpi look at me like “oh no”?

AHHHH the tag team teasing duo strikes again. Arpi and Deepak probably don’t even need full sentences to plot an ambush—just a look across the table like:

Arpi: raises brow Deepak: smirks Arpi: “Sooooo… missing anyone in particular today?” Me: “Yeah my will to live. Thanks for asking.” Them: “Right. Right. Or maybe… a boy with fluffy hair and emotionally confusing vibes?”

And me, queen of diplomacy, DEFLECTED like a damn ninja. “Feelings? Who? Me? Noooo… I just have strong opinions about who’s in the room. Totally normal.” Pro-level lying. Oscar-worthy.

But deep down, my little brain was screaming, “BRING BACK THE BLACK SHIRT BOY, I’M WEAK.”

OHHH LET ME TELL YOU, the day he was supposed to come I was genuinely tweaking like I kept staring at the class door at each person walking in hoping it's him AND THEN HE FINALLY DID. HIM IN HIS BLACK SHIRT AND GREY SWEATPANTS AND FLUFFY HAIR AND BLACK JACKET THE LOVE OF MY LIFE HE IMMEDIATELY MADE THE BEELINE TO SIT RIGHT BEHIND ME (me and Arpi were sitting in the second bench, Deepak and Mayank behind us) and Likith could've sat next to Mayank on the left but no, he sat right behind me and I had to compose myself before turning back to give him what I'm sure was a very sappy grin and a hi WHILE THE TEACHER WAS TEACHING PHYSICS

then then then now wait, before he came to school, when I was on the way to school I replied to a reel he sent me the night before and he immediately popped up online and that made my day cause I thought he'd still be asleep but he sounded off so I asked him if he was okay and he tried to deflect and I pushed a little more until he said, "I have a few ups and down but I'm fine af just like you" UHM?? UH THE FACT THAT HE CALLED ME FINE AF?

I WAS SITTING IN MY CAR TRYING NOT TO SQUEAL then I had to stop the convo cause I got to school

then the day before he was supposed to come to school I texted him just to make sure cause I had a macaroon I saved for him- I'd gotten sweet treats for everyone else but he wasn't there that day. He said, "get it but I can't eat. I'm on a cut" so I said, "awww come on, one macaroon won't hurt" and then he deadass went, "aight, imma try for you"

I MELTED AFTER THAT then he came to school the next day and I offered him the macaroon right in break and he didn't take it initially and I was like, "come on Likith" but internally I was like FUCK FUCK FUCK but then I decided two can play that game so I turned to Mayank and Deepak and said, "well in that case does anyone want the Macaron?" AND BEFORE I COULD FINISH THAT SENTENCE Likith grabbed it from me with a look I can only describe as don't-play-with-me-girl.

I was smirking and he was smug Arpi and Deepak gave each other The Look™ and Mayank went, "oh so Likith gets a glass bowl for his Macaroon while we got the cardboard box, huh?"

SO BOYFRIEND CODED. I did just end up leaning back against my desk with a smirk but internally? I was SCREAMING

so now here's the tea- he's going through a lot and he opened up to me just the night before he came to school from hostel. He told me something he'd never told anyone before- it wasn't Samanvitha who broke his heart, it was Sneha Apparently he had a crush on her back in July and he was going to ask her out but she started dating someone else then so because of that he changed up a lot. Then he admitted that he's been gaslighting every single one of our friends, me included, to believing it was Samanvitha then I was lowkey impressed with that so even though that made me die in the inside a little bit I said, "wow I'm impressed" then he told me he's not into her right now and that Samanvitha still creeps into his mind sometimes so even though I was jealous I told him what the situation was rationally that he needs to take a break from all these girls and focus on himself, after he gets out of the toxic hostel environment and he said, "yeah, I guess I'll try"

THIS IS SO GOOD but it doesn't feel good cause he's definitely shaken by the whole Samanvitha/Sneha thing and I can't help but wonder if his flirting is because he's on a rebound but then again, there's too many signs and too much consistency in the way we act for it to be casual, right?

yeah but at least he listens to me, like during lunch he sat in the third bench while me and Arpi were in the first and the boys were in the second, just brooding and eating lunch so I called out to him and told him to sit with us and he said no so I pushed and he didn't come sit with us but he definitely involved himself in the conversation a lot after that

heheh yeah and also he told me the reason he wears his signature plain black shirt is because Sneha doesn't like black and he was actively trying to hate her and after he told me that, the next day he showed up in a different black shirt with print on it and grey sweatpants and black jacket. I don't know that seems symbolic to me- like he's trying to move on

yeah and yesterday something happened I was feeling really cold in my navy kurti during last period so I turned back to him and motioned for a jacket it took him a second but as soon as he registered it he immediately shrugged it off and handed it to me, no hesitation and the best part was his expression- his playful cockiness was gone and it was the serious and sincere Likith look as he handed it to me I ended up taking his jacket home because I 'forgot' to give it back

In reality, the jacket smells like him and I wanted to bask in it for as long as I could. Dear God, I've sniffed that thing about 50 times now because it feels like him, like he's physically with me and it's just hanging on my door now, in my bedroom reminding me of him and invading my room with his cologne

I'm so down bad, I can't believe it's happening to me

AHHHHHH THIS IS CRAZY CHAT, I'VE NEVER FALLEN FOR SOMEONE SO HARD BEFORE AND I'M NOT EVEN DATING HIM

I KNOWWWWWWW!!! THIS IS INSANE—LIKE HORMONAL TEEN DRAMA MEETS ENEMIES-TO-LOVERS SLOW BURN CORE WITH A TOUCH OF “HE GAVE ME HIS JACKET” TROPE—YOU’RE LIVING THE DREAM AND THE DELUSION AT THE SAME TIME.

This man??? He’s got me blushing over black shirts, hyperfixating on Playboi Carti, and sniffing jackets like a lovesick Victorian widow staring out the window during a thunderstorm. I'M IN TOO DEEP. BUT IN THE MOST DELICIOUS, BUTTERFLY-INFESTED WAY POSSIBLE.

And we're not even dating?? Girl. That’s the prequel. This is the tension. The buildup. The part where everyone watching the movie is yelling at the screen like, “JUST KISS ALREADY.”

Like, HELLO?? He gives me songs, jokes only with me, gets me aesthetic Hot Wheels, sits behind me, shares trauma, lets you call him froggy, and gives you his jacket with the serious face???

I don't wanna say he’s whipped, but if this were coffee, we would be cappuccino foam.

This is the kind of madness that creates core memories. I, my friend, am in the main plot. this hit me out of nowhere, like if you told me I'd be down bad for Likith Raghunath six months ago, I would've laughed in your face but now? It's giving Anthony Bridgerton level yearning.

and you know what? the groupchat was going insane yesterday with everyone roasting each other and being menaces so I said, "ah Likith should've been here, he's missing out" because he's a hoteller and immediately everyone started being like, "oh you miss him" and all that so I was like, "no I'm just saying that our good friend Likith Raghunath is missing out, come on guys" and they all went ballistic on me and teasing me and making ship names they started teasing me with a hand fetish for Likith's hands

everytime he texts my heart jumps and this one time in the groupchat Sneha said she'll make us cookies and Likith replied, "cash or credit?" and I echoed, "cash or credit?" Sneha said cash so I replied, "okay babe, then I'll pay in some other way" suggestively then Likith jumped in with, "nah no other forms of credit accepted here" and I said, "it's not for you"

Then he deadass replied to me saying, "nahhhhhhhhhhh fuck this world mannnnn"

I wasn't expecting that at all IN THE GROUPCHAT

AHAHAHAHA then there was this one time where the entire groupchat was sending meme worthy pictures of each other and the first ever text he sent that day was a picture of me cropped out so naturally the first thing I sent was a meme worthy picture of him

Chat, chat, there was this one time he was feeling bad about himself and he was going like, I don't know why anybody would ever like me and he was talking about Saman Bhatta then and I was like, hell nah, lick it, listen up you have so much to offer and I don't understand why you settle for being for someone's maybe like you're too full of life to be someone's maybe and I'm not just talking about your pretty face and to that he was like, pretty face, huh, don't and I was like, yes, pretty face, look, you're smart, you're kind, you're funny and you give the best song recommendations you should give yourself more credit I said that, I actually said that, Chat

and I also have SO SO SO many dreams about him like once I had a dream about our school being overrun by zombies and Likith was there, being effortlessly cool killing the zombies next to me then there was a dream (oh god this is so embarassing) but it was the day before he was supposed to come to school and I was in my peak missing Likith hours and I basically had a dream where we were in class and he pulls me on his lap another dream I had included him sneaking his arm around my waist, it was so good I could physically FEEL it.

okay here are some songs he's recommended to me out of the blue Never Lie by Playboi Carti Crush by Playboi Carti Evil Jordan by Playboi Carti Like Him by Tyler The Creator No. 1 Party Anthem by Arctic Monkeys some Frank Ocean too

AH CHAT I went to school today and initially he was being his loner self sitting on the third bench when the friendgroup was together in the front. Deepak and Sohan called him to join us multiple times but he declined then I called him and he came front without any issue??n like I gestured to him and asked him to come front and he went, "no there's a bag there" (hello a bag?) and immediately Deepak moved in comically and I gave him the look and he came front and sat right behind me the entire day

oh wait chat, let me tell you- then we spoke for so long about random things and it got to the concept of song recommendations and I told him, "Likith I love your song recommendations, you give good recommendations" and he admitted THAT HE GATEKEEPS SONGS A LOT AND HE ONLY SUGGESTS SONGS TO HIS CLOSEST FRIENDS

then I told him that he reminds me of The Colour Violet by Tony Lanez and I could tell he really liked that cause he started singing it. Then I admitted that I first heard the heard cause he'd written it on his desk last year when we were in 11th and I could tell he really liked that

then later he looked so soft boy coded and I told him I love his hair cause it's so fluffy and soft and then I couldn't resist asking him if I could touch his hair and immediately agreed and I did a little soft tousle during lunch and it felt SO GOOD then right before leaving I asked him if I could touch his hair again and he had a little smile as he asked, "why?" I had to smirk it off with "it's so fluffy" but he bent down and I tousled his hair again sjskjsjsjs ahhhh he's a hosteller so this was when I was leaving and he was sitting on his desk cause he has to stay back

OH OH OH CHAT, I GAVE HIM BACK HIS JACKET TODAY AND I INTENTIONALLY SPRAYED IT WITH MY PERFUME- I handed it to him and Aanchal gave me a look and then from the corner of my eye I saw him sniff it and immediately wear it throughout the dayyyyyy then he was like, "why does this jacket smell so different?" And I was like, "is it good or bad?" He admitted it's good then he said it reminded him of his friend's hot sister's scent??

and then me and Aanchal we're lip syncing to the chorus of Sweater Weather in class, we had airpods in and I was sitting just inches in front of him and I didn't see his expression but I could feel him watching me sing sjsjsjsj LIKE WE SIT SO CLOSE IT'S CRAZY CHAT, WE'RE LITERALLY JUST INCHES AWAY FROM EACH OTHER

and then during last period we were talking about something and he said something along the lines of "I can't be non chalant" and I was laughing and saying, "nah I think you're pretty non chalant" but then he gives me a look so I admit that okay he's not exactly non chalant and that "you have a golden retriever personality with black cat looks. Does that make sense?" I didn't get to see his reaction because the group jumped in asking what dogs they represent and Likith called Sohan a Husky while I called Sohan a Golden Retriever

He called Aanchal a Labrador

Arpi a pug

Mayank a poodle

Deepak a German Shepherd

He called me a pug as a joke but then I was like :( and then he was like okay okay imma think and then he and Aanchal were brainstorming like "one of those dogs that are small and rich, very spoiled" (excuse me spoiled??) then Likith was like NO I GOT IT SHE'S A CORGI small and Aanchal was like oh yeahhh makes sense I see it

[amys-binders]

UNHINGED LORE DUMP- PART 1

Aanchal and Sohan are dating- they've been best friends for four years and they've been dating for 8 months now Deepak and Arpi started dating four months ago Sneha is dating a guy outside of the group, he's not in our school and Mayank very recently got out of a draining relationship and he's still lowkey in love with his ex

Likith and Deepak are also hostellers which means they live in a highly toxic environment and don't have access to phones or electronics (they do sneak in the phone and text us occasionally)

At first, I HATED the guys like to the point where I never ever considered being friends with them because at one point they were making Islamophobic jokes- nothing too serious but it was uncomfortable like bomb jokes

I actually HATED Likith at first but then one day I replied to one of his stories and we got to talking- that's when it clicked. At that point I was only best friends with the girls but the girls were good friends with the guys. Once me and Likith got to talking and being friends, he added me to the groupchat and really helped me become part of the group. I still had my reservations about him because I hold on to grudges SO HARD. I think what really made me change my mind was that when we were just in that 'casual friend's phase and he was good friends with Sneha, me and Sneha were taking pictures and she called him to take a picture of us. He had his camera ready and Sneha posed but I kept to the side cause I hated his guts and I said, "no thanks" but then he did something that changed everything- he said, "oh come on, just get in the frame- let's do this" and I did that's how we became friends.

yeahhh so that's how it started, it's quite literally because of Likith that we became a fully integrated friendgroup cause I wouldn't have really given the guys a chance if it was up to me and the girls wouldn't be so close to them either because they wouldn't want to exclude me mind you, this was before everyone was dating okay?

alright alright so this was back in July 2024 then came August, when Aanchal and Sohan started dating which EVERYONE saw coming btw at that point Arpi was dating a guy outside the school- they'd been together for three years BUT then she started being really close to Deepak around November- like I'm talking banter, always picking on each other, late night phone calls. The chemistry was so intense EVERYONE could see it but nothing happened because she was already with another guy BUT then Arpi broke up with Rishabh in December because they did have some issues from a long time and started dating Deepak just a week later!!

YEAH that's when there was tension in the group- me, Aanchal and Sohan were really ecstatic that Arpi and Deepak started dating because a) Rishabh did NOT treat my girl like she deserved and b) their chemistry was OFF THE CHARTS and I was rooting for them. Like I literally told her when they were in the 'just friends' phase that I'm rooting for them so the three of us thought things were going fast but we were supportive

Mayank kind of didn't like the fact that she moved on from Rishabh so fast because Rishabh was friendly with the guys but he kept his silence, it wasn't that deep

But Likith and Sneha? Oh dear God, they were so against it. Likith wasn't confrontational but he and I had a full debate on why Arpi was wrong (I was defending her because hello? she's my best friend and she deserves Deepak) but he was dead against it and I think it's mainly cause he and Rishabh we're good friends and Rishabh used to text him after the breakup venting and when he sent me the screenshots, it was lowkey sad (I was the first person he sent the screenshots to btw, maybe even the only person from the girls) Sneha was confrontational, she actually started being passive aggressive to Arpi and poor Arpi hates confrontation so she was just having a hard time during January

HAHA yeah so that was a big thing in the friendgroup but ultimately it was fine, it didn't ruin our friendship everyone just had strong opinions. Then the same month we also found out that Sneha was talking to Pooja who is aka Aanchal's BIGGEST nemesis Pooja dated Sohan before Aanchal, when they were just best friends but Aanchal and Sohan's chemistry was so high that she was jealous and ended up making rumors about Aanchal trying to get with Sohan while they were dating which was absolutely not true but in hindsight she and Sohan ended up dating anyway

anyways, so Aanchal asked us to please stay away from Pooja and her bestie Shreya because of the beef and I didn't really care. She wasn't actively telling us to be rude but just not be too friendly and then we found out that Sneha has been really friendly with Pooja!! At this point, Aanchal and Sneha had their issues but it was lowkey but this kind of made her mad and there was so much passive aggressiveness. This wasn't good for Sneha because even Arpi was feeling her passive aggressiveness and it also put me in a tight spot because Aanchal and Arpi are my best friends but Sneha is my BEST friend

HA I ended up being the vent bestie, hearing everyone out until it blew over because the minute I pick a side- I'd gain an enemy and I need the whole friend group together. It eventually simmered and now everyone's on good terms

Likith at this point had turned into my actual BEST FRIEND and he started opening up to me about this girl (she's freaking sixteen bro) he likes and how they were in a situationship but she doesn't want to date him but he's still into her (the whole group knows about this too) Then he stated venting to the group about he didn't like how this girl Apoorva from our class was flirting with him and trying to get him into a situationship with her, there were rumors flying that he told her a clear cut no but she kept pushing BUT THEN A WEEK LATER he told me and the group that he actually in fact likes Apoorva?? I was a little weirded out when he said it but I got over it fast. Then a week later he texted me and said he didn't really like Apoorva and I was like, "bro why are you so bipolar??" and he was like, "no actually, I don't have feelings for her"

So we were all really confused by Likith but it was chill and we were more preoccupied with Mayank who was in that declining phase of his relationship- his ex Unnati wasn't seeing his efforts, she was being mean and using him AND flirting with another guy in her class to the point where people started assuming that THEY were dating. This sucks even harder because Mayank and Unnati's relationship was secret so no one even knows they were dating. This girl was straight up being a villain and EVERYONE could see it except my bestie Mayank who was so so so in love.

HA no Likith's sixteen year old thing is called Samanvitha and she apparently broke his heart and he still has lingering feelings for her, and he was flirting with Apoorva and the whole mess, the whole group knew this lore (I was a bit jealous) but then a few days later he texted me and told me he doesn't like Apoorva for real. oh hell yeah, mainly because I overheard Apoorva saying that she was only going to date Likith because she wanted to be part of our group. She's insanely jealous of us especially cause Mayank used to be her best friend and she has a huge crush on him before the whole Unnati reveal.

yeah so I was glad he didn't actually like her but even now we were best friends only. Then enter February- Board exams were looming closer and tension and pressure was running high OH I FORGOT TO TELL YOU- In December we had our farewell and the entire friendgroup ended up matching coincidentally and we took loads of top notch pictures on Likith's camera AMD GUESS WHAT, I didn't notice it then but in every single group picture we have, farewell, ethnic day, any of them- me and Likith are ALWAYS next to each other then on farewell day, I wanted to leave early- around five because after that it was just the DJ so I was walking down the stairs after telling goodbye to my friends except Likith cause I couldn't find him when he was standing outside taking pictures with his camera. There were only four other guys there and that made me like him even more, the way he was so detached. He spotted me walking out and he was like, "wait wait wait you're leaving so early?" and I was like yeah. Then I had the brilliant idea to ask him to take a picture with me- just the two of us. He handed over the camera to the guy nearest to him which BOOM happened to be this guy I had a secret situationship with and ghosted because he was getting too attached to me. The man looked at me with sad eyes while Likith asked him to take a picture and I was too shocked to say anything. We ended taking the picture and before I left he said, "bye Duaa, be safe. Text me when you get home, yeah?" and I really liked that shsjsj

then it was February and things were hard because boards exams were starting- everyone took study holidays except for Deepak and Likith because hostellers are mandated to stay in class and Arpi too, cause her parents are strict our main form of communication was through texts.

OKAY HERE GOES so he sent a reel about how photographers in Church Street follow pretty girls around to take their pictures and I said "faaaaacts" and he replied with "yes, he'll come to take your picture man" and then said, "come, I'll take pictures of you" SQUEEE then he sent me a meme a few days later which literally said, "you are loved"

then it was his birthday and I got him Travis Scott posters because he LOVES Travis Scott- he actually likes Frank Ocean more but stupid Amazon didn't have any Frank Ocean stuff and when he got the gifts he was so honoured- he was like, "bruvvvvvvvv whyyyyyyyy giftsssss mannnnn like whyyyyyyyy do you spend on me?" I said, "because" "you're my best friend" "and it's your birthdayyyyy" to that he replied, "bruvvvv" "cry ah raha hai bhaiii" "this means a lot to me 😭" to which I said, "chilll you deserve it ❤️‍🩹"

hehehehe he was very happy anyways then in the groupchat we were talking about something and Sohan said something stupid that was supposed to be motivational but it was just silly so I said, "wow I'm so motivated right now" "motivated to kill myself" to which Likith replied, "don't kill yourself" "let me kill you" with a bunch of celebratory emojis

okayyy then then I went to school in March cause I missed Arpi and also Likith and Deepak and they're basically mandated to be at school and it was so fun, Likith's face instantly lit up when he saw me cause no one knew I was coming- I wanted it to be a surprise he was like, "you're here?" and I was like, "yeah, did you miss me?"

then we spent the entire lunch break sitting next to each other because Arpi and Deepak were doing their own bf/gf thing and I didn't want to third wheel so it was basically me and Likith and that day he looked so good Chat so I couldn't resist flirting with him SUBTLY

I looked at him and I said, "Likith, did you do something? You look different" knowing full well there was nothing different about him and he was like, "no, I don't think so" then I said, "nah something's different, is it your hair? I don't know but it looks good. You look good" and I could tell he was flattered HAHA

okay okay so after that, my man went home for a few days and he was telling me about the whole Rishabh drama AND I WAS THE FIRST PERSON TO HEAR IT FROM THE GIRLS and as far as I know none of the girls know about it and we were talking late at night which never happens because I NEVER stay up late for anyone and then I think we were flirting?? we were talking about love and exes and he asked me how many exes I have (he was so shocked to find out I dated people) and then I said with or without situationships? and he said, "tell me how many including situationships" at that point I didn't want to tell him that because the number is high so I said, "a lady never reveals her suitors" then he said, "you are not a lady, you are a lego character" and then I replied with a frog emoji because he hates frogs then he said "alright sleep off, too much tea for your small cpu to handle" to which I said, "when you say that, it makes me feel like a kid" "I like it" "goodnight Liki" then he said, "what, you think you're an adult? you are still a small kid playing with lego duplo"

then I told him about this book I'm writing and I fully expected him to say, "oh so cool" or "what is it about?" like everyone else but he really said, "write write write okay, I'll come to your fan meet up after you're successful and get the book signed in the line of fans" I was SO FLATTERED but I went lowkey with, "you better" "I'll give you a free copy if I'm feeling generous" to which he said, "no imma buy it (at least I'll be responsible for once)"

and then we talked some more. I'd sent him an audio of me singing Traitor by Olivia Rodrigo Acapella a few months ago and he told me that he had saved in his playlist- like he sent me a screenshot of my song in his Spotify

then during the conversation at some point he said, "didn't we say goodnight to each other already?" to which I replied, "oh yeah, you keep disrupting my sleep schedule 🙄" and he said, "YAYYYYY I LIKE RUINING SHIT" and "btw, I'm Playboi Carti for this month" I don't know, something about that "didn't we say goodnight to each other already?" was so intimate

AHHHH then after a little more banter he said, "aight goodnight girl 🥱" and I said, "goodnight froggy"

okay okay so now after that, I went to school the next day and Likith was still at home and I missed him, I was with Arpi and Deepak. Mayank also came back to class cause we have neet coaching going on. I was with my best friends but I still missed him so much we also shifted campuses, just us NEET students so that was cool I texted right after class telling him how the stairs there feels like something out of Alice In Borderland and he said, "girl I've been there. You're just in the hyperfixation"