Keeping myself accountable @angelwingsanddietcoke - Tumblr Blog

Food diary: Day 2

Just did a 25h fast!! Felt amazing and I didn't even feel hungry for most of it!

Dinner = 661cal

It's WAY more than I would usually eat. I decided to overcount bc I don't actually know how much was in it.

I'm having lowcal protein pudding for dessert as a treat so all in all my calorieintake will be ~800cal

It's higher than I would've liked, but considering I just fasted for 25 hours I'm gonna be okay. Besides I'll be fasting until dinner tomorrow.

Might do a workout later to make up for the calories:/

#anarecia #anamia #anarexia #ana stuff #tw ana vent #ana #bulimia #bonespii #thin inspo #thinnspo #thinspo #thin #bonespro #i want to be bones #i want to be thinner

Accidentally fasting for 24h bc you took a nap>>>>>>>

#anarecia #anamia #anarexia #ana stuff #ana #mia #bulimia #thin inspo #thinnspo #thinspo #i want to be thinner #thin #bonespro #bonespii #i want to be bones

I WANT TO WEAR LOW RISE JEANS AND ACTUALLY LOOK GOOD FUUUUUUCKKKKKK

#anarecia #anamia #anarexia #ana stuff #tw ana vent #ana #bonespii #i want to be thinner #i want to be bones #thin inspo #thinnspo #thinspo #thin

thinslxx

I know that we as a community as severly fucked up but can we all just

Here's to the ones that died from their eating disorders while on this app and in general.

Rest in peace, beautiful angels🌼

Diary entry: Day 2

I'm nearly done with my 22h fast! I only have 4 hours to go. I'm a little stressed about dinner bc my bf is making really fatty food. I've been thinking about loads of ways not to eat it, but I also feel really guilty bc he's making it for us. Idk what to do. I even told him I want to go vegan, but he asked me to wait bc he's making food today. I'm so frustrated:( I also thought about pretending to be sick. Even purging. But idk. He's playing video games all weekend so he won't be suspicious of me not eating and I'm hoping that he won't be able to hear me if I do decide to purge.

Also I found out that we're eating at a family member's house which is making me really anxious bc idk what the food will be or how many calories even a tiny portion is gonna be.

I'll be doing some workouts just to make sure that I'm not going over my daily calorie intake.

#anarecia #anamia #anarexia #ana #anorexia #thin inspo #thinnspo #thinspo #i want to be thinner #bulimia #tw purge #skinny #bonespro #i want to be bones #bonespii #mia

Food diary: day 1

Breakfast: skipped

Lunch: skipped

Dinner: 3 potatoes, 3 tablespoons of sauce, 1 beef patty - 576cal

Snack: 1 scoop of peanutbutter - 59cal

Total = 635cal

I think I did pretty well considering how long it's been since I restricted. I'm pretty proud of myself. I would've like to have kept it under 600 but when I woke up from my nap I could feel a binge coming on (I struggle with B/R cycles a lot) so I had a tiny scoop of peanutbutter which helped loads! I didn't work out today as I struggle with chronic fatigue do to depression but I hope I can get some workouts done tomorrow!

Here is my song for today!

UPDATE!! I said fuck it and I danced for 35 minutes! I feel amazing!

635 - 221

Total = 441 cal

I'm so proud of myself!

#anarecia #anarexia #thin inspo #thinnspo #thinspo #skinny #i want to be bones #bonespro #anamia #anorekcia #anorexiia #Spotify

shitty-piece-of-stardust-deacti

2nd entry

How on earth am I supposed to keep myself accountable like this? GOD just help me, someone, please. I can’t stand another minute in this hell hole of a life. Everything is so damn hard. I still haven’t gotten better. Not with overeating nor undereating. I just can’t win, can I? How do people find the will and strength to control themselves? I’m so w e a k.

I’m worth nothing. nada. zip.

Why do I even try? I have nothing. I am nothing. There should be NOTHING holding me back so why am I still here?? I want revenge on this body, mind and world.

This is it. I’m going all in. NOTHING is going to hold me back from winning. I want this. I need this.

Goodnight to ana only

#anorexik #ana #anarexique #thinspo #thiinsp #thinsppi #thin #dainty #diary #anorekcia #anorexia

1st entry: 17/6/21

My mind is all tattered and filled with disorienting thoughts of what might or might not be and what should and shouldnt be.

I keep battling my mind. Should I re-instigate these terrible actions or stop all and continue living the way that I’ve live for 4 months now? without control? putting on weight fast and eating uncontrollably. I know that I should be happy. I’ve come so far. But I’m torn. I’m miserable. My mind divided between starving and eating. On one half I’m rational and I think to myself “you deserve better than to starve and your disordered eating won’t get better if you don’t” and the other half says “It’s disgusting. You’ve LOST control. You’ve put on tons of weight that you worked so hard to get rid of and now you’re throwing it away just so you can eat icecream and chocolate?”. It’s pathetic, I know.

Where do I go when all I know is overeating and undereating?

There’s no in-between.