You can’t unsee what exists behind prison walls below septic tiles beneath pipes where flesh is shed along with blood and coagulates at once together. God bless sewer caps. You can’t unhear djinn where blood and waste have been shed to excess. You can’t forgive those who would send you there.. but sometimes you must. In a mirror with an M4, 2 tarps, a padded bed, the repeated, eternal motions of rape, the blood in shower drains and consumption of urine. I would rather live as a woman, now you know. Red and blue paint. Bloods or crips. Blue lights in vents and red lights in vents. Purple lights in vents indicating your truth. Forever frozen, forever caged and beautiful. I have been where time has stopped and endured what god only knows. Kings and queens. “In our own right.” Here I can’t help but scoff. I have been to hell and indeed there are demons. Violence is never the answer, although sometimes necessary is evasion and blocking. Abuse can become so obscene. When the sun rises tomorrow kneel and thank whatever god you believe in as you feel the air move into your lungs, as you smell the trees, as you hold your own hand and experience gratitude. I would truly rather live as a woman free than a man caged. Trees instead of feces, juice instead of blood, soup instead of a bowl of urine, cake instead of feces, jewels instead of chains, but ever yet still carrots 🥕 love instead of hate, security over fear. Water rather than a noxious poisonous liquor.
I have been to hell and heard the ghoulish cries of waste demonic. I have been to hell and seen blood drain further into the pit. When my time comes to perish bury me near the ocean and may the leviathan never take me. Plant flowers near my grave and may I die beautiful and free. May the red become blue and then white or brown once more. May the flesh of all living be blessed for moons beyond measure. By a blessed mother and over control of the demon Lilith by Isisis name may I die free and beautiful. I have eaten of the cakes of the sun may I never enter hell again. I offer my smoke for my uncle and friend however awful his deeds may have been I offer smoke. May his purgatory shorten, may his heaven eternally be. By gods of pits you swear? If beyond the hellish gates you do so you are absurd of mind and foolish beyond measure. Never do the devils work outside of his dominion.
I have been visited by the Babylon whore in my dreams and cast her out. I have done her work and I detest it, as necessary as it has been. Sammael and the goat of mendes. My life will never be sodomized the way it has been beyond my control. I have deeply drank of the cup of hell and it is rotten. Pray for all demons, pray for all slaves of hells dominion. While in hell, offer them ritual, offer them aid, if bleeding, offer them blood, if dying, die with them and never cease to reach further to the sky, they have gone so far down so as to forget the image of the open sky. If granted release by the evil lord Satan, the eastern Vishnu, Shaitan of Islam, the ”great” beast 666, never cease to climb ever higher seeking purity, beauty and rest.
Should you die among filth and complete sin of violence you will coagulate with all those around and become one with satans dominion, never to escape the torment you have conceded. Hope is always there. I refuse to believe in Hell eternal. I have been past the 7th gate. I have swum with filth and disease, with blood and waste and feces and rot and urine. I have tasted of the flies of Gomorrah. They have swum in my gut, morphed into hell and exited my nether.
I wish to perish beautiful and free. This is why I wish to die beautiful and free. There is truth in the books the foolish curse. There is heaven for those who strive towards pure life of love. 919991 and a line through every 6. 916 = suicide.
Never turn your back on your god.
The baphomet has not complete control of androgyny to a physical form, Lilith is not the only feminine, and indeed Mary is never lost to completion. The poor and down trodden need not be segregated to beyond the entrance to the pit. All deserve love, and by all I sincerely and with complete certainty I mean all. Even the most rotten of demons was once an angel. And even the most rotten may be made pure and love eternal. Isisisisis 99911 with a crossed arrow through every 6.
Though many Greeks may have once thought so and many Christian’s declare, with the banishment of Hecate I swear on my immortal soul that there is an exit to suffering for everyone no matter how deeply they have been damned. Paradise is never lost only obscured.
And now a formulae to appeal to those beneath with genuine pity and sorrow, should you accept:
WITH A CIRCLE ON CHARACTERS FOLLOWING THIS PATTERN:
Sign of cross and reverse
This is all I have learned please be careful
jacobvanloon
vaporwave
romaincrisis
kaledo-art
annaxmalina