ANNA JOY LIVE

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Words for a Kingdom

These days of awe were long foretold in the hearts of men.

Once we who followed stars, could only whisper hope's name.

And the silence seemed so empty to keep desire alive.

Still, I am one who has been waiting for peace that would come to stay.

My heart is yearning to know if this has changed the world.

Would eternity find another face in this hope fulfilled

Of all creation finding herself trembling, kingdom meeting king

Promises of restoration, of glory that would find space in earthen sphere.

A single breath causing history to be written on fresh pages.

As though my voice could now be heard into the holiest places

And the haze that once separated my understanding from yours

Finds itself lost in the midst of the glory that caused you such sacrifice.

Life that is now Yours flowing into the earth creating beauty from marred.

You who did not see fit to see us as slaves and you as master,

but came into the middle of our worlds, to redeem our very souls.

You took the distance between us as a dagger to the heart of all that you are.

And rejected fear as though it were something to be despised.

Wrap broken flesh around you, and become the heart of my very being.

The promise of Your Spirit has come, and I see your face as it truly is.

The hungry are full. The oppressed, free. Justice has a champion.

Love that could infect life into this earth as though there was no evil.

Your will is being created in the midst of my living, my desire.

The surroundings that are filling my senses are where you're invading.

I've created sanctuary for You. I'll be the home that you've never had.

So create your world through me, the dream that you always wanted to be.

If you would but walk with me. If you would but live among me.

I'm yearning to know you from a glance of your eyes.

A God who would make such sacrifice. Just to make love known.

Too deeply do I feel every breath that is this new world. God With Us.

[theessentialmannyc-deactivated2]

[annajoylive]

“It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living, I want to know what you ache for. It doesn’t interest me how old you are, I want to know if you are willing to risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive. I want to know if you can live with failure,...

This is beautiful and true.

[annajoylive]

Thoughts about a woman named Anna

I came across this beautiful snip of poetry by the Russian writer Anna Akhmatova today:  

"You will hear thunder 

   and remember me,

And think: she wanted storms.

   The rim

Of the sky will be

   the color of hard crimson,

And your heart,

   as it was then,

   will be on fire. “

I’ve been thinking I would like to read more poetry as of late, and something about her sparse words caught at me, so I looked into her works a little more. 

I read her biography on Wikipedia, here:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Akhmatova

While I don’t support her choice of lifestyle overall, a few of the choices she made struck out at me.  She lived in a time where revolution was all around, and the poetry she wrote was being attacked as corruptive, but she chose to stay in her country despite severe personal loss so that she could tell the stories of her time. 

Anna gave a voice to an entire generation of Russian women.  She taught them how to speak.  She molded culture by her poetry, and by her pain.   All with simple written words.  

A brave decision.  A brave voice.

It’s hard for me to understand that words can have that kind of power.  

I’ve always understood, I think, that my life has power.  My actions and choices have power.  But perhaps less so, I’ve believed that words have as much power.  I listen to the words around me, but I don’t always hear them.  

I guess I’d better keep working on my ‘smithing. 

[annajoylive]

But you're not afraid of my failures.

Fear doesn't touch you in the face of my lack.

I thought perhaps I didn't know

what it is you meant when I listened

to the stories you dreamed of my days.

And still, I'm not sure that I do.

Words won't do justice to the pain.

The sacrifice, or the sorrow.

And neither can they paint a picture

fair of the triumph, fulfillment, or life.

But these things you've put inside me.

The ones that feel like concrete mist

or the haze over the mornings dew.

Underneath the solid earth.

Breath and wind, but heart and soul.

I don't see that I could possibly be enough.

Still you're there inside it all.

So the waiting and the searching.

The praying and the hoping.

Even the breaking too.

How beautiful, life.

How beautiful, You.

[annajoylive]

This is making me happy today. 

[annajoylive]

Pieces for Winter

In between the mornings and the evenings

where salted light finds it's way to the warm breathing.

There on the fleetings of time

the livings come and go as if they were smoke.

But still, even in their vapor, the icy castles

frozen inside a still more frozen world

slowly melt when the salt caresses their walls.

Warming from the seasoning, warming from the touch.

Dripping down and forming a river,

slipping away to run to the sea

The hearts are left exposed.

I reach out into the frosted air.

Cold with the failings of my own heart.

Wanting this place between us to be on fire.

But time is warming slowly, just the way it should.

And I'm watching the winter nights slowly turn to day.

This silent moon won't last forever.

And these sacred nights of ebony will come to an end.

But will these glittered frostings never die?

[annajoylive]

I wrote this originally, thinking of the way that it felt when I first got to know some of my favourite people.   But then I realized I wanted this to be about me, too.  The way I get to know myself, and how I begin to find myself inside the spaces of time.   The description notes for my year, even, perhaps. 

Strange how words have a way of doing that.  Becoming their own meanings apart from what you gave them.  Sometimes I think the words are simply borrowing my fingers to give themselves life.  But then I think that's a little overly dramatic and shake my head, back to reality.  ;)

Anyways, here it is, a bit of museful wondering, perhaps you can relate to this feeling of acquaintance-ing:

.

.

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"I've been throwing this ball around inside the dark caverns of your soul, beginning to understand the shape of your smiles, and the size of your dreams as it comes reflecting back to me.

Letting in slips of light, your eyes are windows illuminating the way the life pours out of you like water dripping down into the earth.

I sit here and wonder, an explorer of your mind. Thoughts that you perhaps will share, or the ones that dance across your face, thinking I'll never know what it is they mean.

But I'm growing accustomed to the rhythms of your breath, and the beating of your heart. Seeing inside these archives of feeling you keep so silently hidden from all the world.

They slip out more than you might know, to those who are wanting to see.

I've been looking.

The beauty of you just being hasn't gone unnoticed by me. I didn't miss you sitting there, you who are wanting to be. You're succeeding.

You're what I've been waiting for, in all your uniqueness, the silence and the glances, the smiles and the dances. Stronger in your fragility than diamonds only there to shine, you're here inside these spaces of time. "

[annajoylive]

Holiday Cheerfuls

Oh my my.

Time does fly.

However, it's been a lovely holiday season so far, and I've been off gallivant-ing to parties and plays and bake days.  All the whimsical traditions and obligations of the Christmas season.  

And, also?  I've finished college!  One and a half years later, and I've completed all my requirements.  Now I simply impatiently await the paperwork to shuffle it's way through and my degree to be conferred in a month or two.  After all this work, it's all rather anti-climactic, but never-the-less a lovely feeling to be finished.   I have plans to spend a slow Christmas day or two with no where to go, and little to do besides create food and consume it.   Definitely a well-good reward for finishing up my studies on time! Hopefully this also means I will return to more rhythms in my days, and more musings to ponder across the white pages.... because I've been missing you!

Until our tomorrows then, love!

-A

[annajoylive]

This cultural enrichment moment is brought to you by Yours Truly and Great Big Sea. Thank you.  {cod liver oil}

[creativesomething]

Creativity is not all about changing the world or pushing boundaries.

It’s not centered on breaking the status quo or creating some timeless invention. There are no desperate leaps towards some great future. New ideas are not sought merely for the sake of having new ideas. Good ideas are not the...

[annajoylive]

I needed to read this today as I struggle to find inspiration for creating in the middle of this gray week. Words I must remember: "For the love of."

Sigh. Tomorrow will be brighter, thank the Good Lord.  

[annajoylive]

I've been watching God.

He's been surprising me.

I keep seeing Him inside my own mortality. Keep running through my own circumstantial tries.

I want Him to do things my way, though I didn't know it. Expected that my priorities would be on the top of His.

But the way He moves, He does it all so much better. Moving in unexpected ways. Leaving me in such awe of the design.

Outside my logic, outside my perspectives. Grander than the stories inside my spaces. He's expanding my visions and my world.

I thought I knew what it was Love looked like.

I thought I knew what it was He did.

I thought I knew what it was He wanted.

But I've been learning about the way His heart is beating. The way His life breathes across my soul. And I realize I don't want to control Him.

This best I've been trying can't hold up to what He does.

[annajoylive]

Can I be forever fascinated by the music, by the creative, by the dancing of You?

Or is there more to this story I've yet to understand?

You are a God who hides Himself, waiting to reveal to those who seek You with whole hearts yearning for life.

How do I begin to unravel the mystery?  Where are the clues You've left for me inside this slender box of gray?

My humanity pushes on these walls, waiting for the cracks of light to seep their way through. Waiting for the tiny threads of yellow sunshine to illuminate the features of Your face.

Mystery and hiding.

Boldness and still Grace.

Love in ways I don't expect.

Your words are beyond what I could have expected.

Can I know such a God? Can I be a friend who You share your thoughts with?

I'm reaching out with my soul stretching to grasp, and yet it is still as you fill it with Your life.

Paradox.

[annajoylive]

Letters from my yesterday-self

Telling me how I was once and will be again

A child who dreams and a child who yearns

Across each sky of blue that takes my hands, these two.

Once I heard a song of beauty and grace

Today I hear it again with another face

My heart is the same, but my heart is grown

I'm beginning to find my way back home.

[annajoylive]

You reach across my living to offer peace for my soul.

Waiting for God in the quiet places of soul, to find Him in the silence of worship, to hear His voice in the spaces of peace.  And He finds us there, in rest, speaking life.

I move into the spaces of chaos, the ones where messy living takes it's place in my senses.  I think perhaps God is silent here. But He is a God who delights in bringing hope to the darkest of places. To messy, peace.  He is not overwhelmed by the confusion, but offers grace in the quiet spaces of our souls to seep out into the realms of life.

Each moment is His presence offered. Each moment is His life available.

I need them here, in these places of living. Peace to offer in the midst of chaos. His Joy to breathe life in the middle of simply drawing breath.  This is how He comes to make me alive.

[annajoylive]

Just in case you happened to be wondering about the entomology of "Gung-Ho!" like I was... I thought I'd give you the link.  ;)

Quite the interesting evolution.

[annajoylive]

Have you seen this video?  I'd heard of this "Good Life Project" before, but never watched any of the videos. This is an interview with Seth Godin, which I really enjoyed. I particularly liked when Seth was talking about "Projects" and going from one project to another.  Good stuff! I'm definitely planning on watching some of the other interviews!  

[annajoylive]

I'm very excited for this coming Sunday, as I'm going to be getting together with about 6 other girls to start our very own article club!  It's like a book club... evolved. ha!  I thought this article would be rather fitting as the first debutante in our little affair, and offer it here for you to enjoy as well!  I find the title particularly incisive.