Apex Predator @annefitzherbert - Tumblr Blog

TEXT 😏 CHANNE

Chad: I'm glad you asked, yes, yes I do! How comfortable are you with the idea of getting tickled? Also, have you ever played with e-stim toys in bed before?

Anne: I don’t do being tickled, mostly because I don’t see how that’s sexy. Also what are e-stim toys?

#x

TEXT 🤔 RAUNNE

Raul: Just the shit we all called Dyl. You think she'd be over it by now, she's been a 10 for like ages now. Fine. What would you want if it was you?

Raul: Same, except I'm wishing it'd start a few days early. I missed it. Then again, I don't have to deal with law school so maybe that helps lmao.

Anne: Not to begrudge another woman a good grudge, but? Still? Geez. If it was me, I’d be thanking you for the motivation to not look like that anymore. But since she clearly feels differently, perhaps jewelry?

Anne: I miss school too, honestly. It’s just a lot and I’m just not looking forward to just how stressful it’s all going to be.

#x

TEXT 🤔 RAUNNE

Raul: It's been YEARS so I guess I'm due again. If you were really mad, would gifts along with the apology make things worse or better?

Raul: What's been going with you lately?

Anne: YEARS? What did you do that requires another apology years later???

Definitely gifts need to go with an apology that overdue.

Anne: Not much. Just emotionally gearing up to go back to school. What about you?

#x

TEXT 🤔 RAUNNE

Raul: You're a girl -- how much time in between apologies works?

Raul: Also, hey.

Anne: Depends on the severity more than anything else? But 48 hours is a good average for most things.

Anne: 👋

#x

TEXT 😏 CHANNE

Chad: It's okay. At least I have someone like you to lift my spirits after she tries to waterbored them. I know I'm too good for them but I still try so hard to love them and all I get for that in return is attitude at best and hate at worst. Of course I care about parenting! My children are the future rulers of Cinderellasburg, and I'm so excited to meet them whenever the exist, hopefully within the next five years. I bet they're going to be awesome. And maybe their going to be family that loves me back.

Anne: Oh okay. Anyway, do you have any like kinks or sexual fantasies we haven’t tried out in bed yet?

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Ruby: She had no idea of knowing she'd be a good mom before she was one though! Maybe she didn't always think of herself as a mom type, or maybe because of how she was raised, she was scared she wouldn't be good at it! You don't know unless you ask, and even if she can't relate, she can sympathize better than anyone I know!

Ruby: They are, but one is way more terrifying in like a morality, legality kind of way! And oooh okay then, I don't think you have anything to worry about, no way is he going to be able to get in there and if he did, he'd have cuts all over his hand to let you know!

Ruby: Why do you want to be with Chad again?

Anne: I guess you have a point but UGH. She’s so excitable and might WANT me to have kids sooner rather than fucking never and I’d rather not know or ask about that one.

Anne: Yes, but it’s also the easy way out which kind of tips the scales more in it’s favor. Yeah, exactly! But now that’s I’ve made myself paranoid, I’m still just kind of 😬 about it. Also you didn’t answer my question! How does HIDING your birth control make you not lose it?

Anne: He’s gorgeous, the heir to Cinderellasburg, understands the importance of maintaining a good image, a great boyfriend, fantastic tourney player, obviously one of the most sought after princes in Auradon. And I love him. Why WOULDN’T I want to be with him?

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Ruby: Still, you could've not said anything to anybody but you didn't! Maybe think about telling Mom though? She's HAD kids, she'd definitely have some good input!

Ruby: Convenient is not better than inconvenient if it also comes with such scariness! But if you hide your pills, he can never switch them out at least. My pills are ALWAYS hidden, mostly because if I don't hide them I forget where they are and I don't take them lol. And yeah! Just make sure talking about sex doesn't lead to like... pregnancy.

Ruby: But.... but why?

Anne: I guess! I don't really think it'll do me good though. She had kids because she's such a mom type and GOOD at it. I can't even imagine what she would have to say on the subject that I could ever even begin to relate to.

Anne: Both things are terrifying though. They're in my purse, he'd have to navigate his hand through, what I think, is currently 13 different knives to even get to them sneakily. Also...what. It won't, I'd literally rather die.

Anne: Why what?

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Ruby: But you shared the trauma with someone who loves you and I know that must've been hard and I'm proud of you!

Ruby: Anne! That doesn't sound convenient! That sounds scary! Isn't that like illegal? And okay, okay, please no rolling off cliffs just yet! Maybe you can just keep putting off the subject and distracting him until you're ready. He IS Chad, after all, his attention span isn't like amazing or anything.

Ruby: Or like... and please don't hate me for saying this, because I'm just saying it because we're listing out multiple options and stuff, but you know, you don't HAVE to be with someone who wants kids so much quicker than you do?

Anne: Only because my therapist is on vacation and telling mom feels like it would be a *Thing*.

Anne: I’m sure it’s illegal and it’s an absolutely horrifying nightmare scenario that I’ve now placed into my own brain to constantly be terrified about, but it would be convenient for ME. I’m not going to roll myself off a cliff /yet/. But I guess that’s a good idea. He gets really distracted if I bring up sex or himself, so maybe that’ll work.

Anne: I know that. But I want to be with CHAD, so I do kind of have to be with someone who wants kids so much quicker than I do.

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Ruby: Thanks, I thought so! But now, no matter what, the first time you bring up babies won't be when you're pregnant so yay, we fixed that!

Ruby: THAT'S SO WILD OF HIM! He really should've dropped that on you a little more gently. And okay, okay, we can work with that! Maaaaaaybe something a little more like "I'm sure your kids are going to be so amazing to meet, whether you meet them today, in five years, or in ten years. Speaking of which, it might be closer to that ten years if you plan on having those kids with me. I do have law school to get through, after all. But we can hash through timeline details at a dinner sometime soon, maybe!"

Anne: We did! Instead the first time I had to bring up babies is because i’m being TRAUMATIZED.

Anne: It is! I really wish he hadn’t dropped it on me at all ever though. If he wanted me to ever think about babies, it would’ve been much more convenient for us both if he just secretly switched my birth control out with candy or like secretly fed me penicillin or something to fuck it up. Then the overwhelming nausea would at least be morning sickness and not an outrageous amount of anxiety that probably won’t disappear for the next five years. I don’t want to hash timeline details out at a dinner sometime. I just want to roll off a cliff and die now!!!

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Ruby: IT WOULD BE PRETTY MESSED UP BUT ALSO... ON BRAND?

Ruby: So that was the first time he dropped baby talk on you?! Like, the first time he mentioned children, he says he wants them in five years?! That's a lot at once, Anne! WOW! And ummmmmmm I wouldn't know what to say to that either but if he HADN'T said that part, what would you have wanted to say? Maybe we can workshop how to say that but like, nicer?

Anne: You know what? That’s fair.

Anne: YES! I knew children were probably going to have to happen eventually because you know, HEIRS. But I did not know it was a CLOSE eventually in his mind. I KNOW! If he hadn’t said that part I probably would’ve been like “five years is stupid and even THINKING about children any time soon is making me physically ill!!”

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Ruby: WHY ELSE WOULD YOU BE ASKING ABOUT BABIES? I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER HEARD YOU TALK ABOUT BABIES! LIKE EVER!

Ruby: Aww, that's such a sad thought! I'm sure they'd like him just fine though, kids are nice! Oh wow, that's FAST! Have you told him that your timeline maybe doesn't line up on that front?? Also, I can't believe you're talking about BABIES with him, wow! Chad and Anne babies. My brain can't even wrap around that yet. I'D BE AN AUNT!

Anne: HOW FUCKED UP WOULD IT BE IF THE FIRST TIME I EVER MENTIONED BABIES WAS BECAUSE I WAS GOING TO HAVE ONE?

Anne: I know! I told him the same thing, but idk I wasn’t thinking that hard about it because I didn’t know he wanted it to be RELEVANT TO MY LIFE SOON. It’s so fast and I’m not even halfway through with law school yet! I would’ve told him that didn’t feel like a realistic timeline but the five year part came from a way sadder statement and I felt bad! He literally said “ I'm so excited to meet them whenever the exist, hopefully within the next five years. I bet they're going to be awesome. And maybe their going to be family that loves me back.” Like??? What was I supposed to say to THAT? My brain can’t wrap around it either. 😐

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Ruby: HMMMMM maybe! Sometimes I think I can't wait to be a mom and sometimes I think having kids is dooming innocent children to have depression that I won't be able to help them through because I can't even navigate my own LOL! Why?

Ruby: OH MY GOSH ARE YOU PREGNANT?!

Anne: NO! WHAT THE FUCK?

Anne: Also 🙃 good to know. One of Chad's horrible sisters said something hateful to him about how all his future kids are going to hate him, so he asked me for reassurance and then started saying that he was so excited to meet these future children in the next five years and??? I've NEVER thought about having children, not really! And especially not in the next FIVE years!

#x

Text 👶 Fitzsisters

Anne: Do you think you’re going to want kids someday?

#ruby #x

TEXT 😏 CHANNE

Chad: It's because Elle is cruel and people usually ignore that about her because she's also not very bright and that tends to draw more focus but she can be really mean and she chooses to aim it at me, probably because I'm her brother and she knows I'll love her anyway, despite her big flaws. I wish she hadn't said it though. It really hurt my feelings more than I think she could've ever guessed.

Anne: Oh my gosh. That’s terrible, baby. I’m sorry you have to deal with someone like that. You are entirely too good for your sisters. I didn’t know you cared that much about parenting either.

#x

TEXT 😏 CHANNE

Chad: See, that's what I thought! My sister said some stuff about how even my own kids wouldn't like me and I don't know, I know she's WRONG, but it still hurt to hear so I thought if the smartest person I knew told me the opposite that maybe that'd help.

Anne: Really? That's terrible! Why did she say something like that to you? I can't think of anything crueler or less true.

#x

TEXT 😏 CHANNE

Chad: Do you think our kids would hate me?

Anne: No. I’m sure you’ll be a wonderful father someday. Why are you asking?

#x

TEXT 😏 CHANNE

Chad: You're so hot, thanks.

Anne: I know 💕

#x

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