i'll eat your babies bitch.

a lot of you are insane and annoying but not in a fun sexy way like i am

[kingofreturn41]

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

"I'll fuck off in you when you're alive again," he countered crudely playful as he started pushing her out of the store, though the laugh that followed was full of sadness. He was, for the moment, glad her eyes had shut because she couldn't see the silent tear that had managed to free itself, falling quietly to his cheek. He wiped it away quickly as he pushed the cart down the road back toward the Wexley.

"Fucking clanging cart," he griped to himself as he walked (since Illy was unconscious after all), having to stop no more than three times to fend off some stragglers appearing from the woodworking as they traveled. Had she been anyone else he would have already decided on leaving her behind, but Ethan couldn't bring himself to abandon her. He felt a pang in his chest every time the thought crossed his mind. It was the first time he actually felt selfish thinking more about himself over someone else.

"Bitch," he thought to himself - lovingly of course. He just couldn't believe Anora had gotten such a hold on him. That she made him feel so fucking, god damn alive among all the death he chose to surround himself with, both now and then. A smile, a genuine fucking smile, crept across his face, but quickly faded with realization of what that meant.

"Guess I really do love you," he started confessing quietly with a sigh of disbelief. He honestly wasn't sure if it was more to her or himself, but she wasn't aware to join in on the conversation, so what did it matter. It was out in the open now. "That feels fucking weird to say and if you tell me you heard this, I'll just deny it, blame it on a fever dream or some shit, but you really fucking got me. Right here," he went on, tapping at the center of his chest. "You, Anora Horowitz, have made Ethan Harrison feel the one thing he never thought possible. Fucking love." He leaned down next to her ear and whispered his next admission. "You won."

-----

As soon as they made it back to the Wexley he rushed her to Val or Ruth or whoever was nearest to help save the only person he cared about. And whether they wanted him to or not, he stayed by her side the entire time, waiting as patiently as he could for her to regain consciousness.

[anorahorror]

-

All in all she was pretty fucking lucky. There were a lot of ways to die and most of them were horribly painful. Blood loss was a kindness compared to the horrors that were out there. Even the mangled flesh on her neck was a lottery win compared to the videos of acid attacks or shotgun suicides that Anora had made her name by sharing and preserving online.

Besides, attributing her survival to luck was preferrable than acknowledging how hard Ethan had worked to keep her alive. She didn't want to talk about it. And she really hoped Ethan didn't either.

"I feel like fucking shit but I'd rather be feeling like shit at my place." She complained as she sat up in the hospital bed. Anora had been here for basically a week and she was practically crawling the walls. She needed to get out of here. It smelt like stale air and chemicals and it was always too cold. She was going to hit the next person that asked how she was feeling. She hoped it was Charlie.

Anora looked down to the IV that was still in her wrist, ready for future blood transfers or saline infusions ( both of which she'd had many the past few days ). She pursed her lips before pulling the needle out and dropping it on the metal table next to her. "I'm fine. And as soon as I find my shoes I'm leaving." She would trek back to the loft that had once belonged to Butcher and his weird ass pals. It didn't have running water but it had a bed and liquor cabinet and Anora didn't need much more than that right now.

She wasn't sure she even had shoes anymore. The clothes that she wore certainly weren't hers--that outfit had probably been more blood than fabric after Spirit.

Putting her legs over the side of the bed Anora focused on keeping her balance. "If I don't disappear before Aspen gets back she's just going to follow me." And that was the last thing Anora needed to deal with.

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

He purred and bit at the air in front of her face just before handing off her drink, purposefully holding it back as he leaned into her touch. He liked pushing her buttons. And had she not half assed repeated her performance back at Spirit he would have actually admitted that, yes, in fact he would have missed her. His body instinctively jerked back to lessen the blow despite her holding back herself, a small grunt leaving him when she made contact.

"I didn't say I wanted to kill you," he disagreed, giving her one of the glasses. "You asked," he pointed out, taking a drink of his champagne. "You can't blame me for being curious if you have what it takes to survive the real me," he added with a small chuckle - but he knew out of all his girls, she would have been the final one as they say.

He led her over to table off in a cozy corner and watched the rest of the party as they just enjoyed themselves. As if all was normal and happy and fun and the world hadn't already ended. It honestly sickened him. "How long do you give until they get bored with each other and realize they settled?" he asked as he took another drink, staring at the 'happy couple' as they danced, jealousy tinging his voice.

[anorahorror]

For as many times as he's barked about the real me, Anora's finally beginning to take him seriously. For as much shit that she's done she'd never actually killed anyone until the world ended and by then it didn't really matter. And Ethan wasn't a run of the mill killer either; he was methodic, obsessive. There were so many red flags that even Anora should've went the other way ( A normal girl would've figured this shit out a lot sooner ). She grins again. "I wouldn't have had to survive to win." That would be the advantage she had over him. She was willing to die out of spite. She could've killed herself before he had the chance, or maybe found a way to call attention to him so that he was caught after her death.

Illy sips as she follows him, setting the now empty drink down on the table as she arrives. She wraps her hands around Ethan's neck and presses their hips together as he looks past her to the bride and groom. "I think he's already figured it out. He looks dead behind the eyes." Anora offers her assessment. "Maybe you can do them a favor and slit their throats while they sleep tonight." She was joking. Mostly.

"How long has it been anyway? Since you serial killed someone." They killed people all the time but usually they had it coming. Anora didn't really count those.

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

He laughed softly at her proposition of what could have been their niche film making endeavors. Snuff films. He'd honestly never thought of filming himself in the act before. Maybe she was right and they could have made an absolute fucking killing letting the world see how masterful he was at it. But who knows, maybe not. Not that it mattered anymore now that the world had ended and it no longer mattered what skeletons hid in your closet. Murder was just a way of life now. The norm. Sadly. He missed the days of it being a unique trait to be able to off someone.

Her next question wiped the smirk off of his face and he propped himself up on an elbow so she could see him, sighing as he ran a hand caringly along her cheek. "Why? Jealous it wasn't you in that chair?" he asked, his eyes dancing over her features as he watched for even the slightest tick that he'd struck a nerve. He trailed his touch down to her jaw, grabbing hold of it gently, but firmly. "I already told you I didn't do it to fuck them." Ethan's grip loosened just enough to slide down to her neck, retightening once it found its usual comfort wrapped around the throat. "I did it for control," he added, his eyes shutting the reminiscent feeling washed over him.

God damn did he miss it.

He relinquished his grip and let his hand rest against her collarbone as his eyes found her once more, his smirk returning. "Trust me, in California it's the blondes who're insufferable. Redheads are actually the smart ones," he added with a small huff of a laugh. His fingers ran along jawline, tucking her hair back from her face. "Brunettes were always my personal preference for fun though. They were both cocky and intelligent which was too good to take out of the gene pool. Glad to see that hasn't changed at the end of the world," he genuinely complimented Anora of her kind.

As uncomfortable as it may have been for him (despite the ease in which he exuded), Ethan allowed the glimpse into his true feelings remain visible to Anora. Maybe if she had been conscious during the trek back from Spirit he wouldn't have had to make himself so vulnerable in that moment, but then again maybe it wasn't so bad that she found out. Either way, he liked her and she wouldn't have ended up as just another piece of jewelry in his trinket box. She was too special.

[anorahorror]

Jealous?

Yeah. She was. And as Illy recognized how sad that was the dagger of self-loathing that rested deep in her black heart wedged itself a little deeper.

To Illy, sex and control are synonymous. Both were best when intertwined with violence; hands tightly wrapped over a throat or teeth tearing at skin. No one in her life worth staying had done so without tasting blood. But she's trying to see his perspective--trying to accept that a relationship doesn't always have to be a means to an ends. How much blood did Ethan have to shed before she'd finally believe he could be here to stay?

His hand slips around her throat and that familiar feral feelings creeps up inside of her stomach. Desire. Want. Longing. Anora Fucking Horowitz does not LONG. This is so fucking stupid! Men are stupid and she's stupid and feelings are stupid. She breaths in a long slow breath once she's able, watching Ethan watching her. "Okay." Anora contends to his point. Her lips pull into a small smile.

She listens to him without adding comment. When he's done her hand searches the bed to find his. "I guess I used to have a trophy box too..." Anora had never really thought of it as one. The people her mementos represented were all alive and generally well. "Not for kills." She's trying to find a way to explain this that doesn't make her sound like a psych case. She fails. "It was for hurts."

"...There's a fluff of fur from the hamster i put in the garbage disposal to spite my brother, Half of a set of lingerie that I planted in my dad's car to start a fight between my parents," She pauses racking her brain for a few more to share. "Oh my plane ticket from when I flew to Ireland with an older guy I met online and accused of trafficking me, and.. a pregnancy test I used to fuck with the guy who broke my heart and told me I was a disgusting piece of shit." The last one obviously held some significance. "He was fine reminding himself we weren't really family until he decided he was too good for trash like me." And at 16 that had cut pretty fucking deep.

[insporp]

©

[snuffdog]

i need to find someone who'll indulge in my awful behaviors but also make out with me

[anorahorror]

@survivalxofxthexfittest

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

"Longest someone's lasted," he repeated to himself as he thought through all of the sessions he held in his den. Each name was ticked off as the memories of their last moments recalled themselves. At the same time he wondered how long Anora would have been able to hold out. She had proven herself more than capable to withstand his flavor of pain in the bedroom, but meeting the end of his blade was another story. Could she have been the one to outlast his cruelty?

"Two days," he finally answered just as they came to the edge of the reception. The memory of Chelsea fondly replayed for him. She held out as long as she could. Her determination had almost been as resolute as Anora's. "But I never decapitated any of them. It was always..." He pulled her in closer and ran a thumb across her neck, indicating how he slit their throat to ultimately end their suffering.

Forty-eight hours may not seem like a long time, but if she'd seen the lengths he went to break them she would understand how amazing it had been that Chelsea had lasted as long as she had. He'd even felt a smidge of pity for her when he'd ended it. "Think you could have done better?" he challenged as they headed into the party and he grabbed them a couple of champagnes.

[anorahorror]

A part of her is relieved to hear that none of the women have lived long enough to.. to do what? Form a connection with him? Make an impression? Illy recognizes her feelings of possession but she's not always sure what to do with that. She certainly wasn't going to fucking admit to feeling jealous.

It's easy to imagine his fingers as a blade. She thinks of the red that would spill from her wound and cover them both. Just as it did before.

She considers his question and after several moments turns back to him with a grin. "It wouldn't have mattered how long I lasted," While his hands are occupied with the champagne glasses Illy palms his cock through his jeans. She figures no ones paying any real attention to them. And she doesn't really care if they are. "You would've missed me when I was gone." But he never would've found another girl like her. For as much as she would've pissed him off there had to be equal parts satisfaction in trying to take that smirk off her face.

She taps his dick in a not so gentle manner ( but infinitely softer than their experience at the halloween store ) and grabs the champagne before he spills it. Once a brat always a brat, sorry babe! "That's for wanting to kill me!" In the hypothetical scenario. That she created.

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

"I do that plenty," he bit back, although his tone was less harsh as he dropped down next to her on the bed. She seemed to be extra testy. What the fuck was going on with her? No way she was catching feelings. Not Anora Horowitz. Unwilling to share Ethan even with the dead?

He watched her silently after she asked her question. There was definitely something going on inside that mind of hers. If he could only figure out what. How did he pick? Ethan didn't answer her right away. If she did have ulterior motives, the last thing he wanted to do was feed into her game and let her win. But the honesty he had with her was one of the main reasons he had chosen her, so maybe he could play along until he work out the rules for whatever was going with them.

Ethan fell back next to her with a sigh, staring at the ceiling all the same a smirk tugging at his lips as he thought through each one of his girls and their desirable qualities. "I liked them to be easily forgotten or unwanted. The less likely someone was going to come looking for them the better," he started explaining. "Cali was full of naive starlets running from their shithole nothing of a town looking for their big break and my family's name got all of them into my casting chair."

There was something supremely intimate about sharing the sacred details of his process with her. No one knew the methods to his madness. No one living anyway. Absentmindedly his finger began to caress the back of her hand, the gesture a physical manifestation of the closeness he was feeling more and more with Illy.

Ethan wasn't sure exactly how deeply elaborate he should be with her, but if circumstances had been different between them he most definitely would have chosen her to be among them. She checked off almost all of his boxes. However there was an important difference with Anora - she savored the parts his other girls despised. There was a chance he would have let her live all the same. It was exhilarating to say the least to have found someone he didn't have to hide around.

"Hair color never really mattered, but I did have a penchant for blondes. They were always more fun to break because they thought their shit didn't stink. They were also always the first to think fucking me would save them," he went on in further detail with a small chuckle with the reminiscence of some of his victims begging for their lives.

[anorahorror]

Anora watched him from the corner of her eye. Ethan's expression seemed to grow dark with excitement. Something in her recognized that Ethan was actually a dangerous man to be around; but that only cemented her attraction further. She wasn't sure she could love anyone but she was certain that she couldn't love someone unfamiliar with violence. Anora was sharp edges and raw wounds. Gentle had never felt safe. It's when she's thinking this that his finger starts to trace the back of her hand. She tenses. But doesn't pull away.

"We could've made some really good snuff films." She recounts, half-kidding. Illy lifts her hand towards him, turning him by the chin to face her. "I'm a really good shot. I would've kept your face out." His precious anonymity could remain. She even knew how to blur him out if he was going to be that difficult about it, though not being able to see his body would def lower the sex appeal of the video.

She pinches his chin before taking her hand back. Illy agrees about the type of women he's describing and it's clear in her expression. "And how many of them did you fuck before delivering the news that it wasn't going to be their key to freedom?" She snorts at the idea. The crushed hope would've been something delicious to savor, even Illy could see that. Psychological pain could cut just as deep as physical ( though the blood and guts usually got a lot more views ).

For a moment she considers sharing something about herself. That's what you did.. right? He lets her in. She lets him in. Of the secrets she had from him few felt safe to share. She was a really bad person.

"Blondes? ....Kind of cliche." She ribbed him. "Honestly it's redheads that are insufferable. They always think they're quirky or something." The word was emphasized with disgust. Anora recounted the girl she'd pushed down a set of stairs in middle school. And again in high school. The year in juvenile detention had been well worth it. "Like bitch, I will knock your ass out just as fast as the rest of them."

[d3adgirlsblog]

[yasharose7]

Pull your panties to the side, we need to talk

[anorahorror]

@survivalxofxthexfittest

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

The agony written all over her face from him fucking with her wound sent a chill up his spine. Her cries of pain, quietly falling just between them as they may have been, washed over him like a wave of nostalgia. Her grip on his wrist sent a tingle of desire through his nerves and a shuddering breath escaped him. Had they been in different circumstances, he would have loved to have her in his chair. Chained, gagged, and under his complete control. It was almost overwhelming to imagine Anora as the next woman privileged enough to have a seat in his den back home. It was a shame the risk of her actually dying on him had to ruin what could have been a romantic rendezvous for the couple.

His free hand let go of her jaw and found its way around her waist, pressing them as close together as he could. He nuzzled into the opposite side of her neck as he packed in the last bits of fabric, pressing a gentle and surprisingly loving kiss against her skin. Ethan wasn't sure what was worse - the grief he already felt over the possibility of losing her or that it mattered so much to him. He followed up his kiss with a small nip, willing the lump forming in his throat away as he brought his attention to her wound and secured the 'gauze' as best he could.

"As much as I would love to relish in your torment," he told her with a strained chuckle, clearing his throat as he brought his eyes back to hers and caressed the side of her face one last time. It was bittersweet that it might be the last time he looked it her eyes. "You need actual help and you still owe me that blowjob," he added through a small grunt as he stood and lifted her from the ground, readying to depart back to the Wexley. "Especially after punching me in the dick," he added as he headed toward a nearby cart, lowering her down into it.

[anorahorror]

There was something deeply exciting about having no control. A lot of men thought they could control a strong woman until actually confronted by one. But Ethan had yet to fail Illy's tests and each one passed only solidified her desire for him. Not just sexually. Him, as a partner. Anora wasn't sure the last time she'd given a shit about anyone other than herself or Aspen. Ethan released her face and moved to adjust his grip on her. Anora's fingers began to loose on Ethan's wrist because it just hurt too fucking much to hold on. She lifted her gaze to study him. She drank in the thinly-suppressed worry across Ethan's expression as he grappled with being the one without control for once.

She did that. She made him feel that. Illy could get drunk on that kind of power.

Something was bubbling in her throat and it was probably blood but for all she knew it was the words I love you trying to crawl their way out. She swallowed hard. It didn't clear the feeling. "fuck off..." Illy joked weakly before closing her eyes. The movement was making her dizzy. Or maybe the lack of blood. Or maybe the zombie had infected her? She was supposed to be immune but what did she fucking know anymore--she'd just ignored every ounce of common sense in her body to act as a human shield.

[attachmentbarbiee]

[anorahorror]

@survivalxofxthexfittest

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

Ethan chuckled knowingly with the insult. Mostly to himself. While he was a slut, and quite proud of it, no one, not even Anora, was privy to the tradition of his true desires. All his trinkets trophies were earned through the exquisite beauty of pain and suffering, not something as trivial as pleasure. Especially from an act as meaningless as sex.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer, growling lowly through a kiss - the compliment almost as good as her admission to stalking. Ethan had already admitted to himself that he liked Illy more than any woman before (although calling it love was not something he was willing to accept just yet) and it seemed like his chosen plus one for the apocalypse was dropping hint after hint that she too may feel the same. Not that he would ever tell Anora, but for once Ethan was actually happy. It was just too bad the world hadn't ended sooner for him to experience it.

"Dream all you want baby, but I promise it definitely would not have ended like that," he dashed away her fantasy with a smirk. "Killing you on a live stream would have only got me caught and you would have won the game. But I can promise I would have made you explode from the pain you would have endured," he told her honestly with pride. "I can still make it happen if you're up for a trip back to Cali. I bet my den is still intact," he only half-joked enticingly.

[anorahorror]

She pouted as he bursts the bubble that had been growing from her head. He couldn't just let her have the fantasy? Bitch. "What's the longest someone ever held on?" There's a challenge in the question. As if she needs to know she could do better. She keeps them walking down the path towards the reception. "I mean, I know you can technically live with your head decapitated but that's not what I mean." Illy wanted to know if anyone had impressed him. If they've been able to hold on long enough to spite him ( she would've, naturally ).

She lacks the self awareness to worry about the fact she's constantly trying to one up dead women to impress a serial killer. Ignorance was bliss, right ( god she'd been so embarrassed if she could see herself ).

"I can't believe I've never asked that." She reflects, thoughtfully adding, "I think I was expecting your answer to be disappointing." There were a lot of questions about Ethan that she never got around to asking ( most of the talking she did around him consisted of threats and insults. like any loving girlfriend, right? )

[pxtitxrosx]

The mention of blood relation not being at thing shared between the two Horowitz sisters was only met with a semi-dismissive hum from Charlie, who knew exactly how little that probably truly mattered. No one in the township by this point was blind to just how much the two girls cared for and looked out for each other. Above all. That was at least something Charlie could relate to.

"I'm fine." Groaning as she slowly got up from the crate, Charlie wiped away sweat from her brow that felt like it should exist but didn't actually, and gave a wave of her hand to lead the way. "Believe me the last thing I want either is another baby." Adam was a handful all on his own most days, and if it weren't for the plethora of helpful hands around town she wasn't sure how she would have handled it on her own.

"Keep pointing fingers and Karma is gunna end up landing you with a bun in oven, just watch."

[anorahorror]

"Yeah I'd sooner kill myself," Ethan would at least agree with the idea. "So keep the..." Anora paused as she search for the right word. "Mommy Voodoo to yourself."

Illy kept her mouth shut to hold back her opinion about Charlie's sad little life as a housewife or her only talent of laying on her back. Anora could be nice--she could've ripped Charlie's head off for the fucking ridiculous notion of her being a mom. But she didn't! Being the bigger person was fucking lame. She held an awkward attempt at a smile on her face. "You really do look like shit though." Illy reaffirmed bluntly. Maybe Charlie had gotten some super std from sleeping with her half-zombie boyfriend.

[hope-zhang]

"Can't rush mother nature, even if we frankenstein it a little bit," Hope simply shrugged it off with a contented resolution to the problem. Nothing much else they can do, trees just take forever and there's no way to transplant an entire fucking tree in this day and age. They've be slower than a confused chomper. Grafting cuts a lot of corners it done right but nothing like an instant gratification.

Hope grinned at Anora as if knowing the continued line of questions meant that she was thinking about it, more than happy to take any help that might come their way. "Oh you know.. fancy housing estates, parks maybe, the Botanical Garden had one in our greenhouse, that's where I got the seeds from, but out there.. it's hard for avocado trees to survive New York winter, they need sun all year round, but it's not impossible," her voice started excitedly at first but faltered at the realization that most trees in the wild perhaps might not have survived the years, it might be a futile try but still, Hope wouldn't mind a trip back to the Garden in the Bronx.

[anorahorror]

Anora disagreed. Just about anything could be rushed given the right motivation. She found that violence usually worked pretty well. Surely there was someway that could translate to nature...

"Fancy houses are about the only places I care to loot anymore." They were a few years into the apocalypse--there wasn't a lot of actual supplies left to be found. But rich people were weird and hoarded all kids of shit. Most of it could be used to entertain Illy at least for an afternoon. "I'll keep an eye out for any... trees." It felt silly to say. It'd probably save everyone a lot of trouble if Hope actually showed her what kind of tree to look for. Otherwise, Anora was going to make Ethan lug back just about every portable one they found. They had to get it right eventually..

Yeah the more she thought this out the less likely she felt in their ability to find the right one without Hope present. "What's stopping you from going back there then?" Zombies, probably. But they were everywhere these days.

[feniksvoid]

[anorahorror]

@survivalxofxthexfittest

[survivalxofxthexfittest]

"What are you my fucking therapist now?" he asked rhetorically with hardly a glance back her way as he put the box back in its home in his dresser drawer. "This might come as a shocker Ms. Freud, but just because I like being in control, doesn't mean I need to fuck all of my girls to get it," he pointed out as if she should know his kill history - she'd never even fucking asked.

Why was he even explaining this to her? Ethan never had to justify his past extracurricular activities before and he doubted Anora cared as much as he was giving her credit for. In fact, he was sure I'd he ever did go into the gory details she'd probably get off on it - as long as he left out the aforementioned sexual escapades of course. He knew how easily her jealousy was triggered, sexy as he may have found it.

"My future might be yours but my past, this part specifically, is still just mine," he told her pointedly with a motion to the box as he shut the drawer, unaware of the silent admission of his commitmentto her. "Unless of course you want to hear about all the women who've already satisfied me. Maybe you could get a few tips," he poked further spitefully.

[anorahorror]

Ms. Freud was probably the unsexiest thing he'd ever called her. Ethan could have it his way, this wasn't hot anymore. Her shoulders fell in obvious disappointment of the conversation's direction. Sex was about all she knew; Sex and violence. She didn't know what to do if a problem couldn't be solved by one or the other. "They all say the same shit." Anora replied indifferently to being called his therapist.

Anora turns away from him and throws herself atop the bed. "It's always about mommy or daddy right?" The shrinks always seemed to think so. Did she ever tell him she was adopted? Maybe a comment about her and Aspen not being blood-related, but that was just a side step to the truth. She was unwanted since birth.

Ugh! Why the fuck was she thinking about all this. Fucking PMS. She's looking at his ceiling when his comment about asking for tips causes a sharp, "fuck you." anora would've hit him if he was close enough. but she wasn't going to ask about the other girls. she didn't care.

...it's only a moment later when she blurts out a question. "so how did you pick?" what had made these girls good enough to be one of his? was she good enough?