public apology
okay this is legit the only blog i now have on Tumblr, i think the last time i actually posted on here was may or something like that so it’s not active.
so anyway. as the title says this is a public apology to everyone in the rp community, and i know not everyone is going to listen to me but i accept that anyway - at least i tried to apologise and i know i’ve done something good for doing it.
a few days ago i actually spoke to brogen (@warblossomed) to clear the air and move on from the situation, i apologised in that chat but all you guys saw was the screenshot of a conversation between me and my friends; including “courtney the bully”. i shouldn’t of gotten my friends involved as this wasn’t their fight - i was a coward and couldn’t fight my own battles.
this is basically part of the conversation i had with brogen, me apologising for basically everything that has happened (of course people here wouldn’t of seen that because brogen decided not to share that part with anyone)
now really this is really what people need to know, about how i really feel about the whole situation. i even mentioned in there that i know not everyone will welcome me back with open arms but i know that and i accept that not everyone will even listen nor accept this apology now - i can only hope some of you DO read this.
basically to put the whole conversation into a paragraph it would be; i’m so sorry for what has happened the past week. i didn’t mean to upset anyone nor did i wish for anything to go this far. what i did and what i said to not only talia (gothamcartel) but everyone in general was nasty, it was wrong and yes it may have come across as racist without me realising it.
i’m sorry for being racist. i’m sorry for disrespecting everyone and i’m sorry for upsetting people and for not listening.
i wanted to apologise to @gothamcartel , @warblossomed but also @gutrage & @nahzferatoo - you two were friends to me and i broke that friendship, i hurt you and i didn’t mean to.
to steph @nahzferatoo ; you have no idea how much you mean to me, you were one of the only people i could trust, you would cheer me up on my bad days and even thinking about what i’ve done to you now is already making me tear up a little - i’m so so sorry for hurting you steph, it breaks my heart.
to danny @gutrage ; you might not have seen me as a friend but i saw you as mine. you are one of the funniest most creative people i’ve met on here. you’re talented and your love for logan makes me so happy. i know the struggle of what you have to go through - i have a trans sister and she has been dealing with bullying and other issues for god knows how long (probably over two years now) and she’s been struggling with not only being trans, her sexuality and so many other things. i apologise not only to you but any other trans person i might of hurt as well during this time and many times before.
as i said in the statement above i might come back eventually; whether it’s under a new blog, a new alias again or whatever. i enjoy writing too much and just the overall experience of roleplaying to let it go. and i only hope as time goes on people and people i thought of as friends would forgive me and move on as well. some might not and i understand why; please let me make that clear right now. i’m sorry for hurting poc, i’m sorry for hurting everyone, i’m sorry for just my attitude and the way i acted, it was disgusting.
for now this is all i can say, if anyone has anything they want to say to me feel free to message me on this blog or on my d*iscord ariestals#5471