
shark vs the universe
Today's Document

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JBB: An Artblog!

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Not today Justin
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Cosmic Funnies

Janaina Medeiros
$LAYYYTER
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

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DEAR READER
AnasAbdin
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@apatheticalpha
would you ever consider wearing a tutu?
*Slowly reaches for a knife, murderous intent palpable.*
|̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ |̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿| ͇ ͇\̿ ̿ ̿ ̿|̿ ̿ & FµrÎ◊µS || Tabitha & Jun
"Ngh, whatever!" Jun snapped back, shakily forcing himself to stand. That last kick had hit him dead in the stomach, and he was having trouble breathing. He wasn’t gonna lose this fight anytime soon. Pissed off, now soaking wet, and apparently completely out of his mind he spat back, "You can try, but an old man like you has nothing on me!"
And with that, his fighting attitude practically melting away, he tugged at his lower eyelid and poked his tongue out in the best akanbe gesture he could muster.
As much as he’d have liked to brag about his seriously masculine strengths, of which he had none, Jun knew that this guy could seriously hurt him, and the last thing he wanted was a broken nose to ruin his pretty face. So, now the only way he could really win this brawl, was either by kicking his legs into overdrive and hoping he’d never meet this guy again; or, the rather more dignified option of challenging him to a Pokémon match, which was, of course, the option he’d much rather take. The last thing he wanted was to be remembered as was “Oh yeah, that kid who picked a fight with that fashion disaster and got his ass handed to him.”
Taking a few steps back, he pointed a challenging finger towards his, now furious, elder. "Why don’t you prove that in a Pokémon Battle?!"
Please work, please work, please work. He silently prayed. I don’t want to die at the hands of a man in a cat hoodie.
O l d what!?
This bastard ... he didn't know what he was getting himself into. How dare he call him, Tabitha, an o l d m a n !
HE WAS ONLY 25!
His fingers twitched rigidly at his side - eager to experience the feeling of fists breaking skin. Never before had he felt so enraged! Well ... that wasn't entirely true. When that fuckin' bitch May and the damned punk Brendan ruined Team Magma's-- Che.
No! That was a memory he dared not reminisce on for fear of demolishing the surrounding area.
And Maxie wouldn't be all too happy should news his trigger happy admin went just that: trigger happy.
His aggression only intensified at the taunting action thrown at him.
This bastard was seriously going to get it!
"P o k e m o n battle?" The admin barked out a deranged laugh at the suggestion, taking great pleasure at the way the boy nervously took a few steps away from him. Well, at least he knew who was in charge here -- and it wasn't some bright ass hobo either.
"Who fuckin' said I even had any?" Of course he had Pokemon; he didn't go anywhere without his beloved minions team. But this kid didn't need to know that.
"But even if I did ..."
His knuckles cracked ominously as he slowly approached the other, a dangerous glint lighting up his eyes from the shadow of his hood. And then, with years of reaction training, he shot out a hand in an attempt to grab the kid's shirt collar.
"It'd still be much more satisfying breaking your face in myself."
Entertainment! Or not. || Tabitha & Silver
Big place, hm? Well, this forest certainly didn’t look all that big. It’d take him all of five minutes at the most to get through it - Unless the cosplayer was referring to Mt. Chimney, which just so happened to be right past this lame excuse for a forest. He didn’t care much for the history of other regions, so he only did minimal research on the famed mountain. At one point in time, it was a secret base, if he recalled correctly, but he never found out who owned the base or if it was still active.
Nevertheless, the other seemed pretty amused by his implications. “Tell me, Cheri Berry; does this handsome mug look like the face of an evil villain?”
Silver gave a nonchalant shrug. “Mmh, little bit, if I’m being honest. If nothing else, you certainly look like an asshole.” Weavile prodded at her trainer’s leg, and he lowered his arm so she could climb up and rest comfortably on his shoulder. She glanced from the red-head, to their ‘company’ and back again, looking a little concerned as she did so.
"Look, if you’re only reason to stop me was to make fun of my hair, then I’d like to finish this up so I can be on my way. You’re wasting my time."
This time Tabitha laughed outright -- though not entirely at what the redhead had implied. He was a cheeky bastard all right, and the admin didn't know whether to be amused or insulted. It had been a while since someone had the audacity to try and be smart with him; but it had also been a while since someone so obviously had no idea of his allegiance.
Arceus was this irritating!
Living the high and mighty life had certainly spoiled him.
And that was just the way he liked it.
"Ahahah! You've got good eyes then, kid." It took him all of a second to find the path he had worn into the side of the mini-cliff from his many trips to and from the base, and then he skillfully scaled down it until he was on the same playing field as the other.
"Not so fast, Cheri Berry~ I'm not done talking with ya' yet. What's the rush?"
Leisurely strolling closer, Tabitha picked up on something quite unfavorable. And it was such an unfavorable discovery that it even caused his eyebrow to twitch. Twice.
Fuckin' hell. Why is everyone always taller than me, damn it!?
Che. Biology. He'd have his moment to shine one day ... even if it wasn't in the h e i g h t category.
"So tell me, you're not from 'round here, are ya'?" In all honesty, he could've cared less where the kid came from.
All he wanted to know was what rock he had climbed his fiery red ass out of.
Only so he'd know which region to torment next.
|̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ |̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿| ͇ ͇\̿ ̿ ̿ ̿|̿ ̿ & FµrÎ◊µS || Tabitha & Jun
If he was honest, Jun didn’t really like Snowpoint City. Yes, Sinnoh was well known for being one of the chilliest regions; and yes, Jun practically loved the snow when it came in light dustings over his home town of Twinleaf; but no, he did not like Snowpoint. Whether it was the muffled quiet of the area that irked him, (How could anywhere be so freaking quiet?!) or the fact that snow was so deep even the most expensive of snow shoes would end up soaking within the hour he didn’t know. What he did know, was that he was here for a reason, and that reason was the Snowpoint Temple.
After spending hours, well, maybe an hour at the most, flicking through mythology books in the Canalave Library, Jun thought he’d like to investigate the Temple for himself. Apparently, a crazy strong Pokémon lay dormant inside, and he couldn’t wait to get a look at it! After reaching his limit at the summit of Mt. Coronet, and witnessing the amazing power of the legendary Pokémon that were believed to control space and time, the blonde had grown fond of hunting out myths and legends, in the hope that he’d eventually run into them again. Dialga and Palkia seemed like a dream now.
Letting out a low whistling sigh, he tugged his coat closer about him, trudging awkwardly up to the Temple. The snow grasped at his legs, and he could already feel the mush turning to slushy cold water in his boots. Ngh. Head down, he kept onwards, the sooner he was out of here the be-
"Hey!" Jun felt a sharp elbow in his torso, winding him slightly. Glancing up get a good look at his ‘assailent’, he was taken aback when he realised he was faced with, uh, well, he wasn’t quite sure. He frowned, what the heck was this guy wearing?! He was about to point out the stranger’s obvious misguided fashion sense, when he was forcefully shoved backwards, "Watch where the fuck you’re going, bastard!"
Landing in a heap in the snow, the blonde clenched his jaws, his teeth grinding against one another in fury. Now he was cold, wet and angry; and he was in no mood to be screwed around by some idiot in a weird cat hoodie. Too mad to come up with an excuse, Jun simply threw himself onto the stockier man. It was totally on.
To say the Magma Admin was shocked would have been an understatement.
He was fuckin' blown!
He had expected the kid to yell at him, throw him a nasty glare, run crying to his mama -- not fuckin' t a c k l e him like he's some football jock!
"Argh--!!" A strangled cry split through the air as Tabitha lost balance -- damn ice! -- and was sent crashing to the ground, back aching from the fall and the uncomfortable weight of the kid pushing on his abdomen in a way that made him gasp for breath.
Okay. If he wasn't pissed before, he was definitely pissed n o w .
"You fuckin' bastard! Even Arceus won't be able to help you when I get my damned hands on y--"
And then, as he went to push himself up and shove the other away from him in a classy display of multitasking skills, his hand slipped -- and he fell again. Hard. And this time, it wasn't just his back hurting either.
"Shit--!"
The kid temporarily forgotten, his hands flew to the back of his head where he was sure a nice sized goose egg would form. Ugh! The pain! As he cradled the injury in the palm of his hand, a rather nasty migraine beginning to assault the inside of his skull, he pushed himself up -- slowly -- while sending the darkest glare he could muster in his crippled state in the blonde haired menace's direction.
"I'm gonna beat the fuckin' shit outta you, punk." Teeth grinding together roughly, he kicked the boy away from him and rose to his feet.
He had done it now.
There would be no mercy.
Entertainment! Or not. || Tabitha & Silver
Just what was this asshole going on about? He has the guts to try and insult Silver, then goes on to say he had no real reason for doing so? Fuck, this was a complete waste of time - And he now appears to be hung up on some insignificant question he failed to answer. His expression had shifted from amusement to irritation in no time flat.
"What the fuck is a brat like you doin’ ‘round here?" He repeated, quickly following this question up with… A threat? Weavile glanced up at her trainer in concern, but he payed it no mind - This entire situation was a joke. Dressed the way he was and using the insults he had dished out, there was no way Silver could take this seriously.
"Yeah? What makes you say that? As far as I can tell, you and I are the only ones in this forest. You wouldn’t happen to be planning something, would you?” He inquired, apathy apparent on his face. “Because, honestly, I’m not really in the mood to deal with any bullshit today.”
Yeah, he was definitely a foreigner. Or a fucking idiot.
There was no one in Hoenn that wouldn't recognize the ominous red-hued uniform of Team Magma -- and at least half the region could point out the general area of where their secret base, which wasn't really so secret thanks to Tabitha's habit of causing trouble, was located.
"Jus' us two, eh?" Plus a couple hundred more, give or take a few grunts. "Who knows? This area's a big place. No tellin' whose hiding up in here and getting into all kinds a' trouble."
Tabitha simply shrugged his shoulders in a noncommittal manner. Might as well play along, right? It wasn't every day that he came across someone who didn't recognize his style.
... but now that he thought about it, he wasn't sure whether that was such a pleasant thought.
He was used to fame! Something he saw no lack of as Magma's mischief-making admin. Now with this fuckin' Cheri Top standing face-to-face with him, not even recognizing the only too obvious uniform, Tabitha was beginning to feel a little put out.
Okay that was it.
When he returned to base he was going to have a very serious talk with Maxie about their next big project.
World domination.
Or some shit close to that.
"Planning something? Me?" Tabitha laughed, a bit sardonically despite his attempt at innocence. "Tell me, Cheri Berry; does this handsome mug look like the face of an evil villain?"
『 O ɳ ʅ ι ɳ ҽ 』
Hey, lovelies! Good morning/afternoon/whatever time it is for you! Just wanted to pop in and tell you all that I'm online, and if there's anyone who wants to start something with my cheeky Tabby-cat here, then just shoot me a message and we can work out the details!
Catastrophic Shenanigans || Tabitha & Proton
Today was a special day, and not just because Tabitha had managed to get off his lazy ass and actually drag himself a good distance from Magma HQ (all the way to Slateport City, mind you). Nope. Today was a special day because was wearing normal clothes -- yes, you heard right. N o r m a l clothes. At least, normal by his standards.
He wore the typical skinny jeans, wife beater, fashionable jacket combo -- paired with a cap large enough it obscured a good portion of his face when the rim was pulled down. A simple enough outfit, but completely mind-boggling to those who were used to seeing him prowling around in the standard Magma Uniform.
Not only was he feeling especially stylish that day, he was also feeling undeniably s e x y .
Even though he always felt sexy - just more so that day. Eh. It was probably the change in attire.
So what was he doing in Slateport City? Nothing. Yet. His mind was slowly forming plans that would certainly get him into trouble -- not like he was ever o u t of trouble to begin with -- and as he watched the ships leave and enter port, sprawled out on a solid stone bench and shamelessly taking up more than half of the limited space, he was finally able to narrow down the list to a select few.
None of which were going to earn him any ' nice guy ' points either.
Not that he gave a rattata's ass anyway.
Cackling to himself, he pushed off the bench in one easy motion when the next group of tourists stepped off the newest ship that had entered port. With hands stuffed in his pockets, he leisurely strolled closer - lavender eyes locking instantly on a man that had quite the look to him.
Well, that one looked interesting enough.
T a r g e t F o u n d .
|̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ |̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿ ̶̿| ͇ ͇\̿ ̿ ̿ ̿|̿ ̿ & FµrÎ◊µS || Tabitha & Jun
He didn't like being cold. Nope, he didn't like it one. B i t .
For fucks sake! He was in Team Magma for a reason! And it didn't even have anything to do with the s t y l i s h uniform ... which he had tweaked a bit from the original version Maxie had created.
... Shivers ...
What a damned nightmare t h a t had been. Talk about being fashion dead. Yeesh!
Back on the subject! He hated the cold!
SO WHY THE HELL DID MAXIE SEND HIM TO S N O W P O I N T C I T Y ! ?
All the way in fucking Sinnoh no less! Arceus was he seething. Had his hood been down, it would've been beyond obvious to see his displeasure -- and not just because the vein in his temple was protruding out to a worrisome degree. Nope. It was all in the eyes. Those narrowed, set your body on fire and watch in gleeful, sadistic perversion as said body turned to ash kind of eyes.
Yes. That was how obvious his displeasure, at that very moment, was.
So why had he agreed to go out of the region to pick up a package (yes, just for a fucking p a c k a g e !!)? Because Maxie told him to, and then used the worlds, "You're the only one I can trust with this," to make Tabitha feel like a fucking special ass person. Argh!
Just Maxie wait ... when he returned to based, the first thing he'd do was --
"Hey!" It had been entirely his fault, but there was no way that Tabitha was going to admit such a thing. Rounding a corner in the snow covered city, the Magma Admin had roughly bumped into something.
Someone.
An eye achingly b r i g h t someone.
And that just served to piss him off even more.
"Watch where the fuck you're going, bastard!" He growled, roughly shoving the other away from him.
Entertainment! Or not. || Tabitha & Silver
Silver was glad that there just so happened to be a cluster of trees vaguely resembling a forest on this cliff side. Hoenn’s climate was a lot different from Johto’s - It was hot, but worse than that, it was muggy. The shade from the ash-covered trees was helpful in cooling him down, but he could still feel the heat cling to his skin. It was a shame he hadn’t expected it to be this gross out, or else he would have prepared better.
Weavile didn’t seem to be a fan of the heat either, being an ice-type and having black fur, but she was as eager as ever to explore. She hopped through the tall grass and poked at every new plant she found, gesturing to her trainer each time she found a rock or plant that she liked. He could only grunt in response, seeing as he wasn’t in the mood to care.
"Oi, Cheri Berry," Both Silver and his Pokemon had their attention pulled to the source of the voice - A man of average height standing on the cliffs above them, wearing one of the most ridiculous outfits Silver had ever seen. His eyes were locked onto the red-head as he continued, "You missed your turn a few roads back. Big ol’ cluster of berry trees down there. You’ll be right at home."
Who the hell was this? Well, he didn’t feel insulted, just irritated that someone was trying to pick a fight completely unprompted. “‘Cheri Berry’, huh? Is that the best you can do?” He hollered back, while Weavile scurried back to her trainer’s side. “At least I don’t look like I belong in a fuckin’ anime convention. What do you want from me? I don’t have the patience to deal with your shitty taunts.”
Tabitha grinned mirthlessly down at the Cheri Top.
What a cheeky punk.
"Oh-ho~?" His hands found their way into the pockets of his pants, and he leaned back on his heels slightly as he studied the -- Arceus! Why the fuck was his hair so r e d ! ? "You look spicy, but your not so hot are ya'?"
A simple shrug of his shoulders allowed the ... Crap a la I n s u l t to slip right past him. Anime convention? Che. It was obvious this kid didn't know anything about style.
"Don't want anything in particular." Except to see how you'd look with a shiny scalp. "But you didn't answer my question."
The grin fell from his face as quick as it had come, and his eyes narrowed threateningly down at the male below him.
"Tell me, kid." A hand rose out of his pocked to tug down the rim of his hood, causing shadow to obscure half of his face. Che. Didn't berry boy know who he was talking to? Tabitha! Admin of T e a m M a g m a . Only an outsider to the region could possibly get away without recognizing this d e v i l i s h l y handsome face of his.
"What the fuck is a brat like you doin' 'round here? It's not safe for kids to be out in such a nasty place all alone. Someone might come along and," lavender eyes glinted dangerously down at him from within the shadow of his hood, "hurt you, or some fucked up shit like that."
Of course he was talking about himself.
... ... ...
Wait ... did he just fucking insult himself!?
Entertainment! Or not. || Tabitha & Silver
Tabitha was in one of his rarely seen, highly rumored, ' good moods '. It could be better -- hell, it could be a l o t better if this one particular grunt was around ... after all, what was a good day without a good laugh? And by good laugh, the Magma Admin typically found such a thing in the torment of his underlings.
Who said he had to be nice?
Certainly not Maxie! After all, Team Magma was a villainous organization. They didn't go around holding fucking tea parties for every new member! H e l l, Tabitha didn't even know what a Tea Party was! If there wasn't even the slightest bit of violence involved, he wouldn't give it a second though.
But still ...
Arceus! Was this damned day dragging on or what!?
F o u r H o u r s !
He had been sitting there, on his ass under the shade of that same tree, for the past four hours straight. Don't get him wrong, he loved being lazy -- but he was feeling particularly ... active right at that moment. So, with a huffed directed at nothing in particular, he pushed himself up - fixing the hood attached to his uniform which had gone askew - and began walking in a slow gait down the tree clustered path leading to Lavaridge.
If he didn't find something to sate his energy, Legendaries help poor Lavaridge. He was tempted to waltz right on down there and shake things up a bit.
Much amusement for him. Not so much for the town.
"Heeeeeeh?" Red. Fucking bright ass red. The admin blinked his eyes as if to clear away the hallucination he was half tempted to believe he was experiencing. How the hell could someone have such bright ass hair!? Talk about being a true red head.
"Oi, Cheri Berry. What'cha doin' 'round these parts? You missed your turn a few roads back. Big ol' cluster of berry trees down there. You'll be right at home." Tabitha cackled to himself, obviously finding much amusement in the picture he had subconsciously painted in his head.
Well, looks like he found what he was looking for.
E n t e r t a i n m e n t .
A 『 ʂէყlἶʂհ 』 Encounter || O P E N
Nudge.
The cool breeze felt wonderful as it brushed against Tabitha's steamy skin; the intense heat of the blazing sun resting on its pinnacle in the sky causing tiny beads of sweat to bubble out of the pores in his flesh.
Nudge, nudge.
A groan rolled past his slightly parted lips as his lavender orbs moved rapidly from beneath the protective covering of its lid. The feeling of fur brushing against the exposed part of his arm slowly began to coax the young admin to wakefulness, and once he regained some feeling in the appendage he sloppily waved off his assailant.
Nudge, nudge, nudge.
A low growl, almost inaudible, caused his vocal cords to vibrate quickly; and in an attempt to block out the tiny body excessively probing at his arm with a cold, wet something, he shoved it away and rolled to his side belligerently.
"Go away, Kain! Fucking annoying lil' shit ..." The pup didn't seem deterred by his trainers harsh attitude - confidently continuing his nagging until the admin finally gave up all attempts at a nap and gruffly sat up.
"What? What the hell do you want?" Kain stood up on his hind legs and rested his forepaws on Tabitha's knee, the fluffy tail attached to his hind end wagging eagerly back and forth. The pup let out a loud bark, causing his master to sigh in annoyance. What the hell did he want!?
"Listen you-!" Narrowed eyes slitted dangerously as a soft sound off to the side caught his attention. With a casual turn of his head that didn't once betray his threatening disposition, Tabitha glared darkly in the direction the noise had sung out from.
"Who the fuck's there?"
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Just a small introduction post~!
おぬこ
ROBOTS OR DINOSAURS?
"How ‘bout none of the above.
Like hell I’d like anything a snot-nosed brat would.”